Name: Shane Gillis and Bobby Lee Debate Soccer
Uploaded: 2026-04-22T16:00:46.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Shane Gillis and Bobby Lee Debate Soccer' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-04-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Shane Gillis and Bobby Lee Debate Soccer' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-04-22. Transcript available.

you know who is a huge soccer fan i just had no idea is gillis oh is he uh-huh
love soccer
we were in the van we had lunch and um you know i was watching the um arsenal
champions of the
game on my phone he's like what are you watching like arsenal playing you know
and he goes arsenal
i go you of course i'm saying that because i defend myself that's your argument
that's my
argument yeah yeah you know me who does he follow can i just finish our
conversation i go what'd you
say to me man he said you said that this reuben was the best thing on the menu
wasn't because he was
like you got to try the reuben it was okay anyway he's a man he's a manchester
united fan thank you
and then i asked him like specific questions he knew everything it was i was
mind boggled he's a big
sports fan no but he was like i've been following them since i was a kid or
whatever i even historically
i was asking him questions and gillis is a man you've had fans so is give me
give me another
comment that's a man you fan you know uh i feel like we do know someone that's
a man you fan they
have the they have black tatted on them he's black oh ian edwards yep yeah
exactly he has a tattoo
doesn't he have a tattoo uh yeah i couldn't see it anyway i knew i could it was
about to come out
dude you're so fast today there's only one i'm so tired you can't be quick
today okay yeah it's just
too you know yeah it's too you know you talk so fast sometimes i'm not there he's
using the laser gun
it's like those greenland sharks you know about those have we talked about that
greenland sharks yeah they they live to over 400 years old some of them 500
years old
really the greenland shark the uh longest lived vertebrae on earth studies
estimated to live 400 years
they're found in the cold deepest part of the arctic and north atlantic these
sharks is my ex up there
these sharks grow at a glacial pace for only one centimeter per year reaching
maturity around 150
years so they grow up at 150 that's when they're like an adult what happened
historically 400 years
ago just google that what do you mean like what happened right from today 400
years ago a greenland
shark was born do you google yeah yeah google that i want to see that happened
today 400 years yeah what
happened today 400 years ago or this month no just say today 16 26. 14 uh 400
and mccone get hit by a
bus um august what is this around 400 years ago the first recorded africans
arrived in the english
colony of virginia at pointe comfort you're up row right row i'm marking a
pivotal tragic start to
slavery in north america roughly 20 enslaved people were traded for supplies
yeah uh okay okay greenland shark
not a good time not a good time yeah time people are on the you know me on the
almost on an old baby's
born wow not good it's not good not good i'm just saying though that they've
been around i mean imagine
there is something alive today that witness that not witness he wasn't on land
going oh my god this is an
atrocity he wasn't like i gotta check this out you know as a baby you know but
he was still a lot
deep in the ocean born when this was going on what are you guys doing what are
you guys doing man
are you guys trading and buying humans i'm gonna go back to the depths of the
ocean
that's crazy imagine interviewing one right now on his deathbed and he's like
do you guys still buy
humans you're like wow yeah that's that's what they look like yeah that's what
they look like they
look 400 years yeah yeah 400 years that's crazy beautiful though it's beautiful
what's the longest
species that what's the longest age length of a species on earth what species
the longest that one
yeah that's it vertebrae yeah yeah yeah yeah longest i'm sure there are plants
or trees that are longer
do you think yeah trees live yeah the longest lived individual invertebrate uh
is the ocean quahog a
clam that can live over 500 years no wow wow oh or the immortal jellyfish they
put it right there
so clam what happened five years 100 years ago google that
500 years ago yeah yeah i'm a clam what did he what did we see i'm a clam we're
clams we're clams
what did we what did we see what did we see so tell us what the world was like
yeah yeah well it was
shaped by the height of the protestant reformation expansion spanish empire boo
boo and the flowering
of the italian renaissance yay this beauty this painting is beautiful gorgeous
a clam today was
just like wow look at the artistry well look at that for magellan so a clam saw
magellan whoa on the
beach saw magellan yeah yeah what is he doing yeah yeah yeah yeah or me i'm i'm
more of a columbus
guy right yeah yeah you're happy about magellan i like columbus that was their
soccer teams back then
yeah yeah are you a diehard columbus fan i'm more a magellan guy the inca
civilization at its peak in
south america stretching from modern-day colombia to chile just before the spanish
conquest in 1533
another bad thing you've done so basically what we're finding out through the
history of invertebrates
invertebrates yeah yeah it is you guys are good pieces of shit pieces of shit
well yeah the philippines
you guys oh my god oh my god what did you do what'd you do lapu lapu lapu lapu
you lap a lapu with it
okay so google zoom in real fast yeah what is this immortal jellyfish a glass
sponge lives up to 15 000
years whoa what 15 000 years what happened 50 000 years ago i'm a glass we're
glass bunches
we're glass all right around 15 000 years be a glass yeah be a glass sponge the
world was
transitioning out of the last ice age warming climate using glaciers man is it
getting warmer
i can feel my toes i can feel my toes finally dude whoa dude humans begin
transitioning from purely
nomadic foraging to living in semi-permanent settlements yeah what are they are
and the
suburbs were born no i'm kidding the use of clay for artistic expression began
beads pendants rather
than utility children's adults were shaping clay reflecting a forgotten chapter
in social development
wow it is cool to be the first person what do you call that hammer we witnessed
yeah we saw a hammer
we saw hammer dude and getting invented that's insane hammer in the morning isn't
that insane
there are glass jelly what are they called glass glass sponge glass sponges
that were around
when a hammer was invented wow yeah the same guy what do you mean glass sponge
same guy today same guy
today same dude yeah yeah same guy same dude is still around crazy is it boring
i bet he's having a good
time no all he's doing is this depends on who's visiting him have you done this
how long can you do this
15 000 years that's insane but there's no thought there's no this is the
funniest thing he literally
googled glass sponges daily life as if they have like a not you know nine to
five y'all brought it to
life oh yeah yeah give me daily life bobby bobby he's got the glass sponges of
get ready with me tick tock
get ready for me to float in the ocean again i have the answer yeah sitting in
one place using their
silica glass uh spicules oh whoops sorry to filter vast amounts of water for
bacteria and plankton so
they're filtering they're living fossils they can live forever and ever show me
the video the glass
sponge i'd love to take a look to see you know this is the thing about this
show is it a poop fart show
yeah but do you learn you sure do you sure do you sure do maybe this thing okay
okay which is film
porifera is this fancy did he do this that is my previous job glass sponges are
classified in
the class hexactin they're actually beautiful dude they exist in all oceans is
he a deer they're asian
and white there's the only two colors back there that's us we started it all we're
sponges dude we
started it all asians and whites and you know why they're so pretty yeah you
know why about because
they're untouched right because no one's with them that's why they're pretty i
want to kill one okay
strange life survival in the dark depths oh look at that they beautiful
geometric shapes they get to
form into the silica structures are so well formed that they can transmit light
similar to fiber optics
amazing yeah but here's my argument against this yeah let's find something
negative i'll say well
because the difference between that and obviously the uh the um greenland shark
is there's no
consciousness it doesn't have a brain as far as far as you know but it doesn't
like you know i mean
it doesn't have thoughts like you know i mean you know i mean why did dad leave
where did all my friends go yeah yeah yeah or you know i mean or you know i
mean god gas prices are
so high i mean they don't have thoughts and he's like well they are doing we
saw what they're doing
to iran yeah yeah yeah yeah i mean there's no right so they're not on twitter i
guess a greenland shark
you know i mean i don't know what they're thinking about probably food first
food for 400 years
yeah yeah yeah it's the second coachella tickets no i'm kidding that's what do
you think they got
what the greenland sharks got backstage passes you think so it's like one greenland
shark watching
harry styles
it's just popping no uh so i mean i'm greenland shark has a brain and it's
right hunting in the
you don't have brains greenland sharks all they do is hunt all day and they
have brains right so they
have thoughts they don't think much how do you know it says they're instant
they're living purely by
instinct focusing on slow motion scavenging opportunistic hunting in the dark
but that every
day is a new day to hunt so it must be fascinating to them because they're
approaching new all the
time they don't stay in the same place do they stay in the same area right so
far and wide swimmers
of their size they have stealth mode stealth mode but also this right it's like
they have to know what
to eat and what not to eat so they don't they eat everything that's you don't
have to know garbage
disposal it's just like you know a diet pepsi can aluminum can they eat i mean
that's what instinct
is you don't have to know it they literally say so that's not a thought process
listen yeah that's
an instinct yeah despite despite being apex predators they're primarily scavengers
are garbage
disposals with diets that include seals polar bears reindeer anything they'll
eat anything
they'll eat anything reindeer yeah reindeer wait wait wait where does it say
reindeer right there right
i just yeah yeah go where reindeer reindeer santa's after you know oh he
crashes into the ocean
right and then greenland sharks are like yeah again like ho ho ho very good
every year he kills him yeah every 300 years he does this right