Name: Mile High Club w/ Mark Normand! | Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Uploaded: 2026-03-22T23:00:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Mile High Club w/ Mark Normand! | Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-03-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Mile High Club w/ Mark Normand! | Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-03-22. Transcript available.

Mile High Club w/ Mark Normand! | Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This
is R U Garbage.
It's our little show. We sit there with your favorite comedians and we find
that if they grew up to be classy,
if they're just a big old piece of trash, I'm your host, Tate Foley, coming at
you on a beautiful day.
We're out back here with Tooties in a new edition. She's out picking up nightcrawlers.
He just fucking spit on them.
The worms. My new co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
He's got a brand new special out there on Netflix. Give it up for Mr. Mark
Norman, everybody.
Our ace.
Good to be back.
And our guest we couldn't be more excited about. He used to have the company,
got bought out by Norman.
He's got a little cash.
The check goes a long way.
Give it up for KJ. Kevin James Ryan, everybody.
What up, gang? Shout out to you as always. Just make sure you rate, view,
subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube. Full video available over there on Spotify.
Climbing the charts.
The boys are climbing the fucking charts over there, baby.
Top something.
Top 100 in...
All podcasts.
Top 100... No.
No, no, no.
No?
No, I don't think so.
Top 100 Eastern Regional.
Oh!
Southeastern Pennsylvania.
We're on the list in top podcasts, and we're in the top 100 on top comedy
podcasts.
There you go.
Nah, we're better than that. Get out of here. That thing's bought and sold.
And check out Patreon.com, the greatest website in the whole wide world, gang.
Yes, sir.
Check it the fuck out.
Mark.
Yo!
I hear you're a comedian.
Yeah, yeah. I just got back from the BAFTAs. I had Tourette's.
I felt so bad for Delaware Lindo in that.
Oh!
I love him, man. He's the best.
Poor guy. Poor guy. Well, it's a funny, like, it's like a woke nexus where you're
like, disabled
or black? Who do we care about more?
Man, that was so... That was crazy.
That's a crazy scenario.
Did we confirm he has Tourette's?
Oh, yeah.
He was the guy that the movie that won was based on.
Wait, really?
Yeah. The guy that won Best Actor.
Selma?
The guy with Tourette's, he had a movie, and the guy that played the actor in
that was the
guy that won Best Actor.
Oh, all right.
He was great in it, too.
I don't know what we're talking about.
I didn't know about this movie. Yeah, I haven't heard of this.
I think you might be making all this up on this spot.
Big Man's good.
Do a little PR run here.
Yeah.
Buddy, congrats on the special.
Hey, thank you.
Netflix.
Netflix number two.
It's a fun hour, and now I got nothing.
Nice.
I'm back out there.
Kid's spent. He's cashed.
I'm cashed out.
You're back doing clubs.
Back at the clubs, trying to work it out.
Yeah.
But, you know, you think, like, hey, I've been doing theaters for a while.
I'll go back to clubs.
You still got to kill in the club.
I know.
Sometimes you got to do it harder.
I know.
Because you got to maintain that.
It gets white hot, and you got to keep it.
And they're right there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, the theater, like, you got the dark room with the chandelier and the
curtain.
This is like, I got a white trash guy going, that's it.
This is my night out, Dickhead.
Let's go.
And, yeah, there's a two-drink minimum here.
And you can always blame it on the theater.
Not blame it, but just be like, it's big, and it's the floor, and the club.
If it's a low ceiling, and you can touch them, and you're not doing well.
See the whites of their eyes.
Bombing at the Comedy Works in Denver.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, the hottest club.
Woo, the best.
You did this in Boulder.
Boulder, Colorado.
I'd never been there.
And we put up a theater date.
It sold.
So then we sold another one.
And then another one.
I said, let's shoot it there.
That's three shots.
That's the way you did it?
You did it on a wind like that?
Yeah, and I was nervous, because Boulder's a little crunchy, a little queefy, a
little
mountain town.
But, no, they were ready to go.
See that?
Look at that.
I know.
Look at this guy.
He's killing it.
This guy's good.
Fun times.
We've been asking people on the show lately, what's something that you do that
makes you
feel wealthy or classy?
And it doesn't have to be like a money thing.
It could be like, when I go to the store, I buy a lot of toilet paper to make
sure I have
it.
Or like, you know.
I'll tell you.
Because you don't indulge on yourself.
Because we have one from a fan that wrote it, and he goes, having all my shirt
hangers
the same color, or even the nice wooden ones, makes him feel like he opens his
closet and
he goes, like, I'm put together.
I'm a wealthy guy.
A wooden hanger is big when they make that clunk, clunk noise.
Because the metal ones are like, tang, tang, tang, they're all stuck together.
I've had some bad hangers in my day.
Oh, yeah.
But one thing I do that makes me feel rich is sometimes I'll go to the self-checkout
and
not steal.
And I feel like a king.
Like, what an upstanding citizen I am.
I could have taken those raspberries.
That's not bad.
You're stealing every time you do the self-checkout.
Easily.
Well, if I'm doing the work, I'm going to take a little tip.
You mean not when you're on the road, like here at the grocery store, if you're
going
for the family?
Stop and shop.
Brooklyn.
That's crazy.
They don't watch you.
So I'm like, well, I'll just put the salad dressing in the bag.
There you go.
You're famous.
You're rich.
You're stealing?
It's a principle.
I hate self-checkout.
Why am I doing the job?
No, I agree.
Now, do you buy the bag there, or do you bring your own bag?
I try to bring the bag, but you forget, so I steal the bag, too.
Yeah, you never.
Well, see, I got a bone to pick.
Hit me.
This world is changing.
It used to be a country.
This guy's deep all of a sudden.
Hold on.
It used to be all queefs and fucking ain't come, Jeff.
It ain't come.
All right.
I'm still coming.
It's right here.
It becomes a Christian comic.
So, I like him in the middle.
This is a good vibe.
We got him right where we want him.
Every restaurant used to give you, you go to a Mexican restaurant,
they put chips and sauce on the table.
Yes.
Now, it's $5.
Okay.
Okay.
No more bread baskets.
No more bread baskets.
No more bags.
The bags cost a nickel, whatever it is.
I went to a restaurant the other day.
The ketchup was extra money.
No.
Ketchup.
I'm telling you.
What, right at the airport?
No.
Was it in a little bottle?
Yes.
So, I was like, can I get some ketchup?
And they brought the little bottle, and on the bill, it said $3.
Jesus.
So, I was like, times are a-changing.
Checkout at a hotel.
You used to be able to check in at, like, 1 p.m.
Now, it's 4.
You get three hours at a hotel.
Exactly.
You got to be out by 10.
You get in at 6.30.
They keep squeezing you.
It's crazy.
And it's going to keep going.
Things are going to keep going.
And I get it.
The restaurants are getting squeezed, too.
But don't fuck us.
The whole country's getting fucked.
The COVID really, they go, we need the extra time to sanitize the room.
Yeah.
That was the big thing.
That was the big, hey, instead of, you know, instead of going out at 11 or noon,
sometimes you'll be on the road, and you'll be like, what time's check-out?
What time we got to hit the road in the morning?
What time's check-out?
And they go, noon.
You go, woo, I can wake up.
Yeah.
We can all grab breakfast.
We can go somewhere.
You got to, it's that.
Love a late check-out.
Love a late check-out.
Love a late check-out.
That's when you feel like a king.
Very true.
That's good.
You hear the cunt of the vacuum in the other room.
You're like, not me, baby.
I'm still here.
I haven't finished jerking.
I still got first 48 going.
Sometimes they knock on the door real early to clean the room, though, the day
you're
checking out.
It's like, what the fuck?
Call ice on her.
I mean, that's crazy.
I'm trying to sleep here.
It's a hotel.
Why would you knock on the door at 8 a.m.?
What am I, a preacher?
But let me ask you this.
In your private life, do you and the missus do anything, you know, a little bit
fancy?
You got the car.
You got the vintage car.
Yes, yes.
Where's that parked?
In a lot, I assume?
Don't get me started.
I just, I just, turnpike.
It shut down on me.
Yeah, it broke down on me.
Broke down.
Jesus.
So I had to, I had to push it.
I was on the freeway, I had to push it down the ramp and then get in it,
because it was
going too fast.
Why'd you just leave it there?
I can't leave.
It's a classic car.
That's all I have.
You pushed it?
That's all I got.
That's all I got, Jerry.
Yeah.
So I had to push it down, then I got in it, and I yanked it, no power steering,
got it
off to the side of the road, and I popped the hood, and I'm looking in like I
know what
I'm doing.
You always think you're going to figure something out.
Jersey, though, there are nice people out there.
One guy saw it.
I've told the story before, but one guy saw him, he goes, you good?
Oh, yeah, I did hear this.
This is great.
He brought me to my car, to his house.
He got a tow trailer thing, trailed it up, brought it to his place like an hour
away.
We sat in the car.
We chatted.
I had dinner with his mom, with his family, and then I got an Uber and went
home, and he
goes, comedy.
At the end.
No way.
Way to.
Where'd he get the car towed to?
His house.
And it's still there?
No.
Then I called a friend of mine who's a mechanic in Philly, and he goes, I'll go
get the
car and fix it.
I'll charge you a million dollars.
And then when you do the Stress Factory in New Jersey, I'll drive it there, I'll
watch
the show, and then you drive it home.
Really?
Yeah.
So I drove it home.
No insurance, no registration, straight down the Holland Tunnel.
Very nice.
Yeah.
Free and cold.
I brought gloves.
A system of dirt bags around the tri-state area.
I like that.
How much was it going to get it fixed?
I don't want to talk about it.
Because don't you have to go to like a specific kind of mechanic?
Yeah, well, this guy's good, but he said the only problem was my fuel valve had
popped off
the engine.
So I was just shooting fuel out, and it wasn't getting to the engine.
So it wasn't even that big of a fix, but...
Gee, that could have killed you.
Jesus Christ.
I know, I know.
I think I'd have blown up like a bomb and I ran.
Sorry.
I thought it was going to be like a real specific.
Like a bomb and I ran.
Yeah.
Because that's not the day-to-day car, right?
You guys have another one.
No, no other car.
That's it.
That's it?
It's a classic car.
I live in New York.
Where am I driving?
What does the wife do if she's going to the grocery store?
The kid or stuff like that?
We live in Brooklyn.
There's a grocery store right down the street.
There's a Target, there's Whole Foods, and a Stop and Shop.
Man, you rents a tight ship over there.
You know, you can't be an Aldi.
I love Aldi.
You probably love Aldi.
Of course you don't.
You ever go to Aldi?
Yeah, we know Aldi.
Oh, I love Aldi.
It's like a FEMA tent.
What are you talking about?
It's bad.
Bristed flakes and fucking cocoa bombs or whatever they are.
It looked like when they put people after Katrina.
I know.
It's all messy in there and shit.
Those silver blankets.
Yeah.
I'm surprised you don't go to Whole Foods?
It's too, to quote, too queefy.
Queefy.
It's like...
He does well.
I know, but it's like you can't get the stuff you want.
Yes.
You can't get the good...
You got to buy all their shit and a version of what you really want.
When you guys did the house, you got like, you know, the good fridge and all
that stuff,
the range and all that stuff.
You spent...
I blew it on all that.
Yeah.
I fucked up.
I should have gotten...
No, I should have gotten that.
I forgot.
Oh, you blew it.
You got cheaper shit.
Well, I just got the thing there.
Like, hey, we got you a fridge and they all did it.
And I don't have the cup in the fridge door.
You know, that thing, the water.
I fucked up.
You could have got the Sub-Z that you can't see.
I might do it in a year or something.
Redo the redo?
Redo the fridge and stuff.
It's an investment.
It pays off in a long run.
Ye