Name: Louis CK’s Secret Wine Regifting Strategy
Uploaded: 2026-03-12T20:00:31.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Louis CK’s Secret Wine Regifting Strategy' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-03-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Louis CK’s Secret Wine Regifting Strategy' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-03-12. Transcript available.

Do you drink?
If you have a drink, what's your drink?
You're like winding down.
Red wine.
Red wine?
Yeah, and whiskey.
I like scotch, good scotch.
Okay.
And I like beer, but I don't drink much.
But those are the three things I like.
Very cold beer.
I assume you've had a couple of nice bottles of wine.
French wine.
Yeah, I've had some very good French wine.
Like I go crazy for like a very good French wine.
How expensive we talk about.
Yeah, what's the most expensive bottle of wine you ever bought?
Oh, a lot.
$2,000, $3,000?
Something like that, yeah.
Oh, wow.
Wow.
It has been a long time since I've done that.
Okay.
I live very differently than I used to.
I used to have gold watches.
That's a sweet shark watch.
Does that go underwater, Louie?
That's pleather.
No, I don't do stuff like that no more.
But I used to go like, let's get to bed.
You know, crazy wine.
Sure, of course.
Once in a while I buy a heavy bottle of scotch, like a really good scotch.
And I keep that for a long, I don't, it'll keep it for months.
Just sip on it, yeah.
Nice bottle of Yellowtail these days.
That's right.
I think your finest box you have back there, please.
What if you're going to dinner, you know, at a friend's house, and you're
bringing a bottle
of wine?
Do you have like a go-to?
What are you spending around there?
Anything?
It depends on the friend, right?
This is what we get into, yeah.
Yeah.
There's, you got the, the wine that was brought to you last.
Oh, you're just re-gifting?
Just re-gift the last one that brought to you.
That's a power, but I never thought of that.
A go-toaster?
Yeah.
I mean, if anyone brings me wine, I ain't drinking it.
Let's say-
Let's say-
It's not going to be what I like, so I just hold on to that until next time I-
Wow.
No one's ever had that answer.
That's really smart.
Yeah, you got to do that.
Let's say Martin Scorses, Martin Scorses, he watches the movie, he sees 4th of
July, he
says it's fantastic.
I want to discuss how you guys came up with it, how you worked with someone
like Joe Liss,
how good he was.
Come over to my house, I want to discuss how you got this performance out of
this guy.
What do you bring in there?
That's a different caliber.
I mean, I bring him or somebody I just really like and feel, or feel grateful
to somebody,
you know what I mean?
Like that, like somebody who I'm like really wanting.
Wow.
I'll get a Lynch bag 2005, if you can find it, 2006, if you can only find it
2006.
Lynch bag?
Lynch, it's French.
It's L-Y-N-C-H and then B-A-G-G-E-S.
I don't know how, Lynch badge, I don't know how to fucking say it.
Lynch bag?
Yeah.
That's the fucking Boston coming out of this.
They got you a Lynch bag.
Let me get a 2022 Lynch bag.
But that's about $200 to $400.
That's a flex, yeah.
Or any kind of like Margot's are good, San Julian kind of things.
Sure.
Any of those in the range of $200 to $400.
Margot's are nice.
A Roudet, Julian.
What do you like red wise?
You a Cabernet guy?
You a Malbec guy?
What do you like?
Only those Bordeaux's.
I'm just really into French Bordeaux's.
Really?
I can get it.
I was just in Copenhagen on tour and our promoter, he's obsessed with
restaurants.
He's been to all the best restaurants in the world.
He's one of these guys.
He'll wait months to go somewhere or whatever.
So he told me Copenhagen is his favorite city for restaurants and that he was
sending me to the best.
So it's his favorite place.
And I did a pairing, you know.
You get a tasting menu with wine pairings.
And they introduced me to natural wine.
This is a new thing.
Yes, very new.
Yeah.
So they start you with the white wine.
They start you with a champagne and then white and then it gets like literally
those orange wines.
And then you get deeper red as the meal goes on.
And they're cloudy and they're not, there's no filtering.
They're not like refined or anything.
Nothing.
It's just the grape.
It's like you taste the earth in it.
It's just, yes.
You can really, and that's what I like about wine is being able to taste, like
I feel like I could taste the weather when it was, and the soil.
So these things, holy shit.
And there's a gamey, like almost rotten smell to them.
Like pussy.
Yes.
But the wines get, and at one point I was like, I'm getting, like I trusted
them.
And I'm like, do people, what do people do to not get drunk?
And they go, no, you get drunk.
Yeah, that's the point.
Yeah, you're fucked up.
And I had to, I had to walk along the buildings.
I mean, I barely made it back to the hotel.
Really?
You were that fucking.
I was blind ways.
I almost, I've never blacked out drunk.
Yeah, never drank.
Serving you fucking Copenhagen fucking moonshirt.
Like Sharon Stone in Casino.
House of the Rising Suns play.
That's how I felt.
And it was a bad day the next day.
You do ice in the wine?
No.
Excellent.
Crazy.
I knew that was going to piss you off.
How many suits do you own?
A lot, but I don't wear them anymore.
I had one tour where I wore suits.
Oh, right, right, right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I got the, because I can't, I wear a suit and in 10 minutes I look like a
disheveled.
A bad accountant or something.
Yeah, like a guy who's had a nervous breakdown.
Sure, I'm the same way.
That's how they fit me.
The second I get into a car, sit down, it's fucking over.
The shirt comes up and out.
Oh, it's horrible.
And the pants are down to my balls.
You look like a kid at his communion party.
Yeah, it's horrible.
Like a fat kid at the end of a wedding.
That's right.
Fucking cake on your face.
That's it.
But when I was in San Francisco with my daughter and we went to a thrift store
and she found a
suit that it was like really cool and almost fit.
So I found a tailor in San Francisco.
I'd never even been to one.
And I said, can you do this to me?
And he said, yeah, by the way, I can make you suits.
You know, you can get one, just get whatever you want.
And he wasn't expensive, but he was, Peter Panos is his name.
And I picked, just that day, I picked a bunch.
Cool.
I decided that day, I'm going to wear suits.
You're going to be a suit guy.
I'm going to wear suits.
I always wanted, when I was a kid, I wanted to be a comedian in suits.
Sure.
And so I had a bunch of shirts and suits made by that guy, like eight of them.
And he sent them.
I wore them for a whole tour of wore suits.
But I'm done with it.
I'm not going to do it again.
Any Armani or anything like that you got at the house?
Like from a couple of movies I was in that they let me keep the suits.
Nice.
You own a tux?
I do own a tux because I used to go to award shows all the time.
You are?
Yeah.
Nice.
Yes.
You know how to tie a bow tie?
Yeah, I did it a few times.
I'd need a refresher.
It's tough, yeah.
I don't know how to tie a regular tie.
Really?
Is that garbage?
I don't think you have a tux, Mr. List.
I don't.
I got two suits.
Nice suits, right?
Ted Baker, right?
Ted Baker, baby.
Imported.
I just got a Ted Baker bag.
I love it.
Hey.
Yeah, he's all right.
Good stuff, Ted Baker.
Yeah.
But I remember hearing you talk about it.
I thought it was somebody you knew.
I thought he was like a fan or something.
That's how trashy I was.
No, Ted Baker.
You know Ted Baker, kid.
I remember when Ted Baker was, I don't know how long he's been around, but I
think he was
a new thing.
Uh-huh.
And I was with Chris Rock in Aspen, Colorado at a festival, and there was a lot
of people.
There was a lot of activity.
People were excited.
A lot of famous people there.
Uh-huh.
And Chris was huge, and I was nothing at the time.
And somebody came up to us with a headset and just said, get in this van.
We're taking everybody to ... And we're just talking, so we just let ourselves
be put
in a van.
Anyway, next thing we know, we're in a Ted Baker store, and they had closed the
store
for Chris.
Real.
Wow.
And they said, pick whatever you want.
And it's yours.
And Chris is a high-class, classy guy.
And he said to the girl, you pick me one shirt.
You pick it for me.
Like, that's the kind of guy he is.
Louie's going to the cash register.
And I was like, no, I went to the leather jackets.
I said, I want one of these.
Yeah.
And they're like, um ...
Are you Chris Rock, sir?
They had to unlock it.
It had a lock on it.
Oh, yeah.
I was like, I want one of these.
Because I was like, I'm never going to be in here.
Chris is trying to maintain this lifestyle.
I was like, this is my last time.
This is happening.
So I still have it.
It's a really good leather jacket.
That's fucking wild.
Did you do Hands Across America?
No?
No.
No.
Did you go to Live Aid?
No.
Farm Aid?
No.
Okay.
Do you have AIDS?
Did you have a Pet Rock growing up?
I had a Mood Ring.
Ooh.
That's what we're looking for.
That's tough.
Any Chia Pets or anything?
No.
I think I might have had a Pet Rock.
Yeah.
I think I might have.
Were you a Captain Kangaroo guy when you were a kid?
I liked the moose.
I hated Captain Kangaroo, but I liked that moose very much.
Dude, those cartoons in the 70s were fucking wild.
Yeah.
I liked, there was some, well, I liked Bullwinkle very much.
Okay.
Those were very funny.
What about H.R. Puffin stuff?
That used to freak me the fuck out.
So I, there was, that was pretty good, but then they had these offshoot ones
like, what
the fuck, the new Zoo Review.
Zoobily Zoo?
New Zoo Review was a frog, Freddy Frog.
Yeah.
Like how fucking shitty that, you know, Freddy Frog.
And then a wise owl and a Henrietta Hippo.
And I hated them.
It was very kind of, I think they tried to go against H.R.
Huffins with kind of Christian ones.
And I hated those.
Jesus the mule?
Yeah.
What was your first concert?
Queen.
Really?
Billy Squire opening for Queen.
And Billy Squire was amazing too.
Queen in Boston Garden.
Wow.
Damn, that's a fucking concert.
Incredible show.
Incredible show.
You saw basketball?
1979, 80, something like that.
They did in fact rock you?
They did rock me.
Because they said they would.
And he took an outfit, changes, and smoke.
Yeah.
And that fucking Brian May on the guitar.
I mean, just incredible show.
That's fucking, that's pretty classy right there.
Ever going ghost hunting?
No.
Have you or any member of your family ever claimed to have seen a UFO?
No.
I don't think so.
Not that I can think of, no.
Ever bought anything off a TV?
I think I might have bought an album off of Late Night Commercial.
Okay.
Did you have Columbia House?
You ripped them off?
No, I didn't join.
I didn't join that.
Really?
My sister did, but I didn't.
Woo!
That was a fucking goldmine.
Yeah.
They were idiots.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They send you whatever you want and you just never pay.
Fucking stupid.
You just don't have to, you have to not mind getting a lot of mail.
Yeah.
You really should pay.
You guys should, you should seriously pay.
Hey, we're not playing around anymore.
This one's in red, red ink.
But you didn't have to pay.
You ever read Autotrader Magazine?
Sure.
Yeah.
First car?
First car was a Datsun B210.
Really?
A 78 Datsun B210.
Wow.
Was it a hatchback?
No, it was a sedan.
It was the best car ever.
I'm always looking on eBay for one.
Four, no one.
They never have them.
That was the first.
And I got, a friend of mine's mom had one that died, so I bought it from her
and that
was my parts car.
That's the car I learned how to fix cars on.
Damn, that's fucking hot.
I would just take parts off of hers and put them on mine.
Yeah.
We drove from Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania to Texas in a hatchback Datsun.
To best.
Yeah.
Big head.
Broke down like four times.
Yeah.
Well, they were made to compete with Mustangs.
Yeah.
So they were actually pretty cool.
Thank you.