Name: Bill Burr - My Female Friend Smells Terrible
Uploaded: 2023-04-16T17:00:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - My Female Friend Smells Terrible' from Fans of Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr - My Female Friend Smells Terrible' from Fans of Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-16. Transcript available.

i'm okay friend who smells like anus oh boy hey you redheaded mick bastard um
i don't give a shit what are you gonna do i'll tell you i think you're banned
from this podcast
huh can i read it yeah go ahead you read it thank you big fan of the podcast my
friend and i saw you
and mr don't forget this part you already read that hey you redheaded mick
bastard that's offensive
now somebody's gonna take that somebody's gonna take that and cut out the part
where you said
that's offensive i just wanted you on tape saying hey you redheaded mick
bastard i love it
all right big fan of the podcast my friend and i saw you and mr verzi do stand
up in albany new york
phenomenal show my question is about women's hygiene oh boy my two buddies and
i have a
friend that is a very nice person and he wears very preppy clothing however
however
she smells like a bag of rotten clams the odor has become so bad that the three
of us have
questioned whether wearing a gas about question whether wearing a gas max
around her this person
needs to write better as men ugh we know it is not right to tell a woman she
smells like ass
but we don't know what else to do should we tell her or con one of her friends
into telling her
thanks bill keep up the hilarious podcast and go fuck yourself first of all you
are so unoriginal
by being like she smells like a bag of rotten clams you know clams pussy um
second of all
if you're not fucking this broad no you don't have anything to say next here
you answer um all right
nia got a little defensive
nia can i ask you a question if you walked around smelling like a bag of rotten
clams wouldn't you want
somebody to give you the heads up before you became a person and wears very preppy
clothing
however she smells like what does that have to do with and i don't i don't get
it
oh because she's nice and she wears nice clothes but she smells like clams a
bag of rotten clams a bag
of rotten clams this sounds like an exaggeration give me a break smell so bad
the three of us have
questioned whether wearing a gas why are you why are you around for what like
where's the rest of your
sentence first of all learn how to write a sentence properly then maybe i can
why are you getting so
defensive like they said you smell like a bag of rotten clams this is this
thing you're just
defending this person because she's a you know what you inserted yourself in
the story and you would
be the person i'm supposed to do isn't it i'm supposed to put myself in the
scenario i guess so
so now what i'm trying to do is i'm trying to help pull you out of that oh okay
and say that you
in no way shape shape or form smell like a bag of rotten clams um yeah maybe i'm
a little edgy tonight
all right fine okay uh so what would you say how can they tell her
all right this this this woman okay probably wants to find love at some point
and you're not gonna you're really limiting you know she's got to find somebody
that works in some
sort of chemical plant that's destroyed your sense of smell so she's got some
sort of like uh medical
issue yeah sometimes you could have like literally a sinus infection that can
give you really bad breath
there's all kinds of stuff like um you know and this is the thing like guys
like it's not like i never
ran into a woman that didn't wasn't so fresh and so clean you know and i there's
no way to tell them
because it the embarrassment of it yeah what should i do singing telegram you
smell like ass like ass like
um how can they do that i i would actually uh i would i would actually think
that she needs if
she's dressing nice and all that type of stuff meaning she's clean i would say
that she probably
needs to see a doctor and it's probably something with her diet i'm just this
is just that i've heard
diet um or i don't know maybe she's stressing a lot i don't i have no idea but
i i honestly don't
know how you would handle that well how how would you handle it okay if they it's
it's like the end
of a tom cruise movie and you got to clip the right wire it blows up in your
face okay first first
thought how are you doing it i think you you take you take them out not on like
a date but just hang
out and just be like listen i love you so much you are such an amazing person
you are the best you're
the best yeah are you breaking up with me um no no no i just feel like you know
sometimes i just notice
like like an odor coming from you so i don't know oh my god i don't know if
like i don't know if like
your your washing machine isn't working you know or like the why would she put
her vagina in a washing
machine they're not smelling her vagina they're smelling her bo right oh when i
heard clams i thought
the problem was in the basement exactly exactly they're talking about her bo i
would assume
oh but it could be helitosis it could be if you're not if you're not her like
what do you
what do you care you know but because they like her they want to hang out with
them but she smells like
fucking i'm sorry he said a bag of clamps i don't know what to tell you yeah
she smells like low tide
yeah maybe well maybe you're washing your what do you call it washing machine
isn't working
effectively or you should try a different uh i know what i would do detergent
what would you do
i get two uh those spray aerosol cans of like deodorant and i dress like a
cowboy
i walk into the bar and go hands up and when she did i go
sorry i got nothing i don't know i i would try to have uh i would i would have
i would talk to a
female friend of hers and tell her to do it because it'll be less embarrassing
and just say you're just
giving her the heads up that's i had a friend and uh i still have this friend
and we had someone that we
worked with someone who i'm actually still a friend with and was it a white
male yeah and he would talk
about how my friend's breath stink and i would always like laugh because he was
right her her breath
did stink a lot and i would always offer her gum gum mints oh you want one you
want one and she would
always refuse so it's like what can i do you have to sit her now and say bitch
you just think no sorry
her breath isn't sink anymore but at the time because probably somebody told
her yeah probably