Name: Bill Burr's Most Awkward Interview Ever (ft. Sarah Silverman)
Uploaded: 2023-08-02T23:00:22.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr's Most Awkward Interview Ever (ft. Sarah Silverman)' from Fans of Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-08-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr's Most Awkward Interview Ever (ft. Sarah Silverman)' from Fans of Bill Burr on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-08-02. Transcript available.

I'm not related to my next guest, but we fight like siblings.
Please welcome brilliant comedian who I love to pieces,
but who makes me fucking crazy, Bill Burr.
Thanks.
I thought we got along great.
No, we love each other.
But you have to-- we always fight.
We fight often.
No, 'cause I go on stage and then you try to correct my jokes.
I don't try to correct your jokes sometimes.
What if you said if the woman did this because of this?
That was one time, but-- and I admit I was being aggressive.
Micro.
It was a microaggression.
Microaggressive, yeah.
Sometimes I read interviews with you,
and you talk about everything you hate,
and if you added it all up, you would get me.
But somehow we love each other.
Am I correct in saying that?
I think that you love me.
'Cause every time we fight, as I'm driving home,
I get a text from you that says,
"You know I love you, right?"
And I go, "Yeah, I love you, too."
That isn't me.
I've never-- I've never said, "You know I--"
Are you fucking serious?
Well, my memory isn't good,
but I don't remember doing that.
I'll show you.
I-- what, you save them?
What, you save them?
I can't believe you're--
No, texts just exist.
Yeah, I press save on my text.
What kind of phone do you have?
No, I, like, delete them after a while.
What are you saving it for?
You delete texts?
Yeah.
Oh, I never do, because all our friends die,
and then it's all you have left.
How many of you had?
Die?
I'm up-- I count--
I have a huge list.
I'm 30.
30.
Yeah.
Get something funny out of that.
That's what you do.
I'm not good at that.
I'm not good in the mom.
All right.
I do like you, and I just--
I always feel like you're frustrated with me.
I fucking love you.
Look at my posture right now.
I'm like, I'm as far over into this chair
as I can possibly be.
I just feel like--
I'm not going to hurt you.
I love you.
You're having a good time, and you just like--
Like, that intro was just like--
I thought you'd like that.
I fucking hate this guy.
He's a douchebag, but he came down here.
I mean, that's how I heard it.
I think that's how you hear a lot of things.
You ever hear this?
If it's hysterical, it's historical.
So I think, like, things trigger you,
make you fucking crazy,
and it maybe means something, like,
it comes from something from your childhood or something,
like the ticking time bomb that your dad was,
or things like that that were out of your control,
and you don't like feeling out of control
or people telling you what to do.
That's my theory.
This is so uncomfortable for you.
I love it.
It feels like an emotional intervention.
All right.
No, I'm trying to be--
No, my big thing--
all you think I'm really working on in my life
is I'm trying not to snap as much.
Like, it's like, I just have a fucking temper, man,
and I don't know how to--
like, it's just my natural--
I'm driving over here.
I snapped, like, five times.
This guy had the audacity to slow down
and make a right onto the street he wanted to go onto.
And all of a sudden, I just found myself just going,
like, oh, what the fuck?
Really?
Really?
Fucking asshole?
Just go.
Like, why--
why didn't you turn so slow?
And then I talk myself out of it.
That's like, he probably lives on that street, Bill.
Yeah.
His kids could be playing out in the yard.
So I've gotten to the point where I still snap,
but I sort of talk to myself afterwards.
So I don't know if that's better
or if I'm slowly going insane.
But the one thing I would say we--
that is a trait we both--
I don't like to be told what to do.
No.
My instinct is always fuck you, a little bit.
Yeah, my instinct is fuck this.
But I do like to--
I walk out.
Like, I went to-- this is so embarrassing.
I went to some place--
I was at some fucking airport,
and I was-- I can't even remember what I ordered.
It was some avocado toast with, like, salmon on it
or some shit, right?
So I order it, and I'm standing there for, like,
15 fucking minutes, and I'm watching these--
like, one person's making it, and then they just, like,
gave up, and then somebody else came over.
And it's, like, forever.
And I'm just standing there, and she got mad at me,
and she starts saying all this,
"We have to put it through the toaster,
like, two times.
We have to get the avocado out."
She started, like, breaking the thing down.
And I was standing there.
And I got so mad.
I'd already paid for it.
And a banana.
And I just said, "Fuck this."
I just walked away, still hungry,
and then I ate the banana, and it was overripe,
and it was all mushy, and I threw it out.
And it was, like, 17 bucks down the tubes.
And I just remember, I'd rather be fucking hungry
than have one more fucking interaction with somebody
that described to me how to make salmon avocado toast
and act like they were pouring the foundation
of a fucking house.
And it's just, like, I fucking hate people.
I fucking hate people that hate their job.
Especially a shit job.
And it's just like, this is why you're fucking here.
I had this job.
I fucking crushed it.
I crushed it.
I was a dishwasher.
I was a cook.
I did all of this shit.
I fucking crushed it.
I'm not saying this is the only skill this person fucking has,
but it's just, like, if you're not going to try at this
because you think you deserve a better fucking job,
when you get that, you're going to be an arrogant ass,
and you're not going to be fun to work for.
I thought all of that over fucking avocado toast.
I think that we're not so different,
but I could be wrong.
You feel that I feel I've got you figured out,
and you're right.
I just think you like me.
I do like me.
You like me, but we can be different,
still like each other.
Yeah.
I mean, like, I like to--
I don't like being told what to do,
but I do like changing with the times or something.
I don't really resist that.
I feel like you resist that a little more,
but ultimately, you do change with the times.
Okay.
You thought I was wrapping it up.
I fucking ripped another.
No, I--
I feel like with you, there's this person you want me to be.
So you keep telling me that I'm this fucking guy that I'm not.
Who's the guy you think I think you are?
I-- I don't know.
I don't know who sent you those texts.
I'm gonna fucking post them.
No, I won't.
Okay.
I remember driving home and you being like,
"You know I love you."
And I was like, "I love you, too."
Does not ring a bell at all.
When the way you just did it, it did.
This was one of my favorite interviews.
I had a great time.
That can't be true.
No, I liked how weird it got.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
Well, all right.
How about this for weird?
Thank you, Bill Burr, for coming on my show.
Thank you.
Thank you for having me.
Thank you.
All right.
Well, that is our show.
Thank you to Bill Burr, Anthony Tamanik, and Will Ferrell.
Look, America, I-- I know I always say I love you at the end,
but to be honest, in the beginning, it was like a joke.
It was a bet I had with my buddies,
and then I really fell in love with you.
Good night.