Name: Marc Maron (Episode 255)
Uploaded: 2023-06-21T22:45:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Marc Maron (Episode 255)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-06-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Marc Maron (Episode 255)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-06-21. Transcript available.

Marc Maron (Episode 255)

I like having fun. I like to love. I like to meet people who can make my life.
What's up? I was going to do a parody of Mark's opening, but you can't do it.
No doing. What's up motherfuckers, fuckerinos, fuckadicks, fuckalucks, fuckaruckers.
Yeah. That's it. Feels good, right? Yeah. Hey, man. You've heard the
Urbaniac impression of you? Urbaniac or I know the other guy. Is that great?
Caliendo? No. Oh, yeah, yeah. He's good. He's good. Do you like that? Yeah,
sure. I never thought it was possible. Right. Because I don't see myself as a
guy who's got enough quirks and ticks. But you do something long enough, people
pick up on the things. Yeah, he gets it. I haven't seen Urbaniac. He does me.
Oh, my God. I might have to show you something really. All right. Hey, let me
just introduce the show. We're lying. Oh, my God.
Tim Heidecker's Office Hours Live going 60. How long were you on the air for?
Six years? 14. No one knows. No one watches. Eight. I think eight. No one
watches? No, no. This is one of the lowest rated. I don't know what you're
doing here. You should have had. Hey, that's nothing to shake. That's good.
Good for you.
Well, people are really into popularity now. It's all about your audience, you
know, and as long as you've got your people, even if it's nine, it's not
nothing.
No, it's true. And we have a dedicated, wonderful following. But, you know,
people sing, you know.
I'm sorry about the panicky email yesterday. I loved it. Can I talk about that
real quick?
I know I'll explain to you why I sent you. Let me get, let me access my Gmail
here. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the show.
Let me just welcome my guests here. Yeah. My, my, my, uh, comrades. Introduce
everybody. Comrades. Do what you do. Ladies and gentlemen, we got Doug Rosenhop.
Good horning. And Vic Berger here. What's up, everybody? I'm so nervous. I'm, I'm
hyped up from the coffee. And, uh, I'm nervous. Yeah, I'm nervous. What are you
nervous about?
I don't know. Having Mr. Man. And apparently I do know you. I, I think you did
a Trump montage. I, yes, I've done a few of those. Yeah. That I was, uh, I
talked about publicly. Yes. Yes. Thank you. Excited about it. Thank you. WTF.
You know who else loves you is, uh, Joe Rogan. He does. Yes, he does. Does he?
Yeah. Big fan. Big fan. He's a big,
the funny thing is Vic, uh, Joe Rogan is a big fan of, of like Tim and Eric.
Yeah. And Doug's work and Vic's work. DJ Doug Pound. Of course, not a two-way
street. No. DJ Doug Pound's cool as fuck. Smartest. One of the coolest people.
Did you see my Rogan parody? I did. I loved it. It was great. No, I never got a
text about it. I, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. There's
a strange history to me. And like, uh, you know, me and, and, and we've known
each other for years to some degree. And there was a time where you booked me
on the show. On this show. Yes. I must've been towards the beginning.
Cause this is what's been going on a few weeks. And I, uh, you know, then you
canceled me. He said, do you want, you want, can we rebook it? So in my mind,
it was because of like my schedule. It was not because I was not interested in
having,
well, no, here's what my brain does. It's like, how, who bumped me? What, what
guests did he get? So that stuck for a long time. And I'm like, I'm not doing,
cause I have a weird,
but go ahead. This will all come from the email. Yeah. It makes a bunch of very
funny, uh,
internet videos. Oh, this is okay. Play that again. So Mark can hear it.
Vic Berger makes a bunch of very funny, uh, internet videos. Vic Berger smash
cuts.
Fucking hilarious. So that's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Yeah. Good. Let's
not give him any air.
So Matt here, producer Matt, who you've been interfacing with more than me.
I try to stay out of the, you got in though. You jumped in. I did. And I'll
tell you,
we'll play by play this. We'll go minute by minute. Okay. So I'm, oh, my,
my brain is like everybody we book is not going to show. Really?
I just feel like, why would you sit? You're 10 minutes away from me. It's true.
It's like the great, I could come over every day. Oh, no, we're going to get,
but I always think something's going to happen. You know, you're going to
realize,
I don't really feel like doing this, but you're not like that. You're,
you're a man of your word. But so then last night, let's see, seven o'clock.
Mark and I, I mean, Matt and I get an email. Uh, what's going,
this is all it says. Well, actually Matt writes, says looking forward to
tomorrow.
Here's the address. Right. Right. Very responsible. And I appreciate that, Matt.
Thank you. And I would appreciate it too. If I'm you,
like somebody checking in. Like sometimes I forget things, right? You know,
cause I don't have an assistant cause I'm a regular person and not a regular
person.
But, but yeah, so some things I'm just like, Oh shit. I was supposed to.
Right. So Matt says that, then you respond pretty quickly. I'd say 20 minutes
later
from the iPhone, cause that's at the bottom. It says sent from my iPhone. It
says,
this is all it says. What's going to happen. What's expected.
That's a heavy, that's a heavy email to get. I can't, you want to know the
backstory on that?
Yeah. So what happens is like back when you were in the Beatles, you know, with
Tim,
yeah, with Eric. Yeah. I, uh, you know, there was, I always appreciated what
you did,
but I always felt that there was, there was a, a meta thing going on. So
anytime I engage with
anything, Tim and Eric. Yeah. You feel like you're going to be the joke or
something.
Right. I always feel like, uh, like I've told you this before that, that there's
going to be a joke
happening and I don't know that I'm part of it. And then lately I've realized,
well, that's,
that's the genius of those guys is that's what life is, man. So, so I hadn't
really watched the
show in its entirety. So I thought what, I just want to know what I'm walking
into and, and how goofy
would I have to be? So rather, right. Yeah. So rather than actually watch the
show,
you just emailed. I did watch it. I did watch it. But did you email, did you
watch?
No, I watched after. I realized because there's something I, because of my Ben
Kingsley experience,
I'm like, what kind of person doesn't research the show he's getting on? Right.
That was,
that was funny because I did listen to the Ben Kingsley this morning. Yeah.
Doug,
email and Doug does a little research too. And he says, uh, I hear this one's a
doozy.
Yeah. So can I just read what I wrote back? Yes. Cause I didn't feel Matt was,
I was, I didn't trust Matt to write, to handle Marin, to handle Marin. No,
I wouldn't have had a good answer. This was a great email for me. I believe it.
I think so. It was made comforted. It really, it calmed you down. Yeah.
We expect, this is a beautiful way to begin. Yeah. We expect nothing but your
presence and wit.
I meant to say presence. Like you'd bring me something like a WTF mode. Matt's
a really,
really nice guy. It's just a live morning show hang. Yeah. Live morning show
hang.
Great. Then I was expecting like, maybe there'll be a guy with donuts there.
Sam. I don't want to do that. We'll talk about you and your special and
whatever else comes up.
It was very nice. Definitely want to talk about music with you. Yeah.
You can inspect my guitars and rate them. I don't know. Sure.
They're behind there. You want to pick one bit? Like a whole bowl and a ham fan.
Throughout the show, we'll pick a guitar for you to inspect.
Anyways. Well,
I thought that was very nice and I think it's a testament to our evolving
relationship that I didn't feel like
that email. I felt it was earnest. I didn't feel like I was being set up.
Nice.
Well, I'm growing. I'm changing like everybody.
You are. Yeah. I feel like that. I feel like that.
Well, yes. We have a long, we have a long history.
I think I have one of these.
Well, that's not the best one to show. I mean,
it's just a 96 Les Paul standard.
Wow.
Is that a good year for these?
Oh, it's the best.
No, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know enough about guitars.
I just started playing Gibsons, really.
I was like a Fender guy my whole life.
We can get you a Fender.
No, no, no.
That's all right.
I like Gibsons.
I've been playing Gibsons a lot.
All right.
Can we do something?
I took a guitar lesson or something.
I saw that online.
You did from your guitar player that you played with.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I took a guitar lesson because I needed,
like, I, you know,
I've been bending the same notes for like all my life.
Yeah.
And I'm pretty good at those notes,
but I'm like,
what about these mixed Lydian scales?
Jerry, the Jerry scales.
Jerry scales, right.
Yeah.
And he showed me them and I'm like,
oh my God.
Do you remember what?
Because I learned that too,
actually, recently.
And the blues, the blue note,
you know, the blue note?
Yeah.
Well, I know pentatonic.
I know the major and minor pentatonic.
Pentatonics, right.
And then you drop down,
like, I know where the pentatonic,
the country pentatonic is for A and stuff.
But then like, you know,
the A mixed Lydian is right there.
Right.
It's basically that country pentatonic
with a couple of flat sevens added or something.
I think so.
Yeah.
He went to music school.
I did go to Berkeley.
He went to Berkeley.
You went to Berkeley?
Yeah.
But it's been a while.
So I'm trying to remember.
Mix Lydian is like five, I believe.
I don't remember.
I don't know theory at all,
but I just know I wanted new notes.
Right.
Right.
And he gave me new notes.
And that Jerry stuff turns out,
it's just these runs that want you to be.
It's like, it's not,
I'm not going to say it's easy.
Right.
But I know where it is now.
Well, you know what my guitar player said to me
on tour last year?
He goes, you know,
you're always one note away from the right note.
Right.
Yeah.
You can just hang a little bit.
You can always work around you.
I mean, isn't it?
Right.
What do you mean there's hidden notes?
They're all right there.
Just one fret going one fret down.
We don't want to hit the,
you don't want to hit clams as Buddy Rich said.
Do you ever play like non-bluesy kind of stuff?
Do you ever play like major?
It doesn't satisfy me.
No, it doesn't?
Okay.
It doesn't like,
even when I listen to,
like I've been trying to listen to like this morning,
this was a harried morning, dude.
Tell me what's your morning.
Well, I knew I had to be here at 945.
I knew it was 11 minutes away.
And then I set my clock for seven
because I just get up early.
And then I'm like,
when am I going to get the gym in?
Because I'm compulsive about it now,
about exercise.
And so I set it for seven.
I'm like,
my plan was I was going to do the gym after this.
I was going to come in gym clothes
because I thought that would be fitting.
I'm going to do the gym after this,
by the way.
Yeah,
but like I got a fridge guy
that's been trying to fix my refrigerator
for a long time.
I got a fridge guy.
Yeah,
fridge guy is supposed to come,
but he's been keeping me hanging for a while.
But anyway,
what's happened to all your food?
It's okay.
The fridge is working.
Okay.
I just got,
when I have free time on my hands
and I'm just trying to write stuff,
I end up getting very obsessed
with dumb shit in my house.
Right.
Everywhere.
I just need,
it's an old fridge.
And I don't even use the ice that much,
but I need the ice maker to work
because it's making funny noise.
So I get up
and I'm like,
do I have time for the gym?
It's seven.
And I go,
if I get down there.
So somehow or another,
I went to the gym,
I got home,
fed the cats,
took a shower,
had a piece of toast.
And I got here at 942.
You got up at seven
and did all that?
Yeah.
Where's the gym?
It's got to be closed.
It's right down there.
Please tell me it's closed.
It's right there.
Yes.
You can walk to there?
Almost.
Okay.
Like this is the nice part.
I've never come to this side of Glendale.
This is where the fancy people are.
I'm down there with the working people.
The