Name: Lance Oppenheim, Melinda Sullivan & Larry Goldings (Episode 292)
Uploaded: 2024-04-11T21:29:13.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Lance Oppenheim, Melinda Sullivan & Larry Goldings (Episode 292)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Lance Oppenheim, Melinda Sullivan & Larry Goldings (Episode 292)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-11. Transcript available.

Lance Oppenheim, Melinda Sullivan & Larry Goldings (Episode 292)

I'm basically not capable of functioning in society!
Good morning everybody!
Hi, this is Tim Heidecker. Welcome to Office Hours Live.
It is April 11th, Thursday, 10 a.m. here on the Pacific Coast.
Pacific Time Zone, I should say.
Weather outside is quite nice.
Sunshine, a little breezy, a little chilly.
Sorry, I'm starting to show a little low energy.
We just received some heartbreaking news.
I'm not sure, I guess you guys are aware.
Yesterday, I believe, Wednesday, 2024, April 10th, that would be,
we, the world lost O.J. Simpson, a celebrated actor from the Naked Gun films,
from the Zucker Brothers, and a football legend.
I mean, one of the great football players of all time, Heisman Trophy winner.
And we just wanted to take a minute and remember him,
and talk about our memories of watching O.J. play on the gridiron when we were
just kids,
and seeing him in those great Hertz rental commercials that were so popular.
And then, of course, as Norberg, the partner to Frank Drebin from the Police
Academy.
I mean, the, I apologize for that.
Naked Gun.
Naked Gun, thank you, Matt.
And Naked Gun, two and a half.
So, this news came by my radar this morning as I was looking at the news.
It says, New York Times reports O.J. Simpson, athlete whose trial,
he ran, let's see here, I'm sorry, O.J. Simpson, who ran to fame on the
football field,
made fortunes as a black All-American in movies, advertising, and television,
and was acquitted of killing his former wife and friend in 1995.
What?
What the hell is that about?
What?
What's the big deal?
He's acquitted.
Huh.
I don't know about that.
Is that worse?
We do, apparently, I guess, what, what, he killed his,
well, he doesn't say he killed, he said he was accused of, I guess,
and there was a big murder trial back in the '90s.
Tim, you can't be digging up these old tweets or whatever you're looking at.
I'm staying at the New York Times here.
They say that the jury in the murder trial, mur, I cleared him.
Wow.
Oh, that's good.
Damn.
He's acquitted.
But there's a, but there's a but.
But the case which had helped, which has held up a cracked mirror to black and
white America,
ruined his world.
Oh, that's too bad.
True.
It's a shame.
Oh, damn it.
I didn't know he had that kind of baggage.
Well, we still remember the great OJ.
We actually got video.
This just came in.
We have exclusive video of his death, which we hate showing on our show.
But cause of death revealed this morning.
And this is sad to see a guy go out this way.
A guy who's really built his reputation and his career in the, in athletics.
Um, but, uh, and children, please look away.
This is pretty graphic stuff.
Let's see how OJ left us yesterday.
Do we have video of that?
Do we have video of that?
Yeah.
It's, uh, it's our duty.
Alec, can you pull that up?
Hiya, buddy.
Hey.
Look, he's seeing those old friends.
I'm sure I should view all my bean and it's good as new in a week.
That's wonderful.
Whoa.
Oh, Frank.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Wait.
Oh, God.
Oh, man.
Oh, God.
Damn.
There's no way to survive.
There's no way to survive such a thing.
There's literally dead.
He seemed like he was already quite, look at him, mid.
He's there.
He knew it was over right there.
It looked like he was already pretty banged up.
That's like your riddle the other day, looking at a field.
Yeah.
He knew he was a goner.
He knew he was.
Oh, dear.
Doug, any thoughts on the passing of OJ Simpson?
Uh, I can't say I have any thoughts on that.
Anytime.
Uh, we got the virus and it's party time.
Well, I, I, uh, was--
I do regret not doing a fake act called OK Simpson.
Well, I, my thought was OJ Simpson died.
Uh, who's next?
Bart?
Uh.
Simpson?
Yeah.
What, is Homer a better punchline?
Well, folks, let me do my, remember I used to do a one joke?
Ladies and gentlemen, uh, OJ Simpson, accused murder of Nicole Brown Simpson
and Ron Goldman,
uh passed away last night with a after a battle of uh battle with cancer uh i
said what's next bart
the whole big band playing right on that i don't know i think the the uh the oj
simpson
trial of the century they called it matt uh riveted us as i was in i was a i
remember this i was 1994 i
was graduating i graduated high school and was home for the summer before going
off to philadelphia
for college and i mean it's all that you could talk about right matt you were
around oh yeah this
is yeah i remember jim apple and he was this was the trial this was the picture
i think yeah
that's kuba gooding jr oh that's oh that was the remake right show me the money
and it seemed clear and obvious that he had murdered his wife like well tim the
sad thing is
that it got whoever killed his wife and rod goldman are still out there
maybe not maybe they were killed shortly after by oj himself as in an act of
revenge
no we never got to the bottom of that but uh i was reading that oj had written
this book called if i did
it shortly after he got out as a way to make some cash um and i guess i don't i
never read the book
but apparently it seems like a ghoulish book where he kind of imagined the
scenario where he if he had
killed his wife and ron goldman here how he here's how he would have done it oh
is that really what it's
about i think so he would have done but but then the goldman family uh sued him
and and uh
acquired uh rights to the book and republished the book and on the cover it
said this title still had
to remain if i did it but they made the if tiny almost impossible to read and
so if you looked at it
it just said i did it wow but it was i mean there's the great espn documentary
and speaking of
documentaries we're going to be speaking with lance oppenheim today with his
new documentary sperm world
it is doc month here on office hours as we uh we clear all the docs off our
plate i'm like get ready
for some all the way yeah i'm getting the feeling of coming at home okay i got
the merch uh and i should
also add that uh we have a musical guest melinda sullivan and larry goldings
who'll be doing a
tremendous tap dancing jazz performance that we saw in the soundcheck and was
quite delightful i think
it's going to cheer you up for all those people who are weeping over the
passing of oj but uh i remember
it was uh then when that i don't know where you were you must have been in high
school when the trial when
the uh when the verdict was read oh yeah yeah vic was probably in eighth grade
i was probably seventh
seventh grade i remember them announcing doug was uh studying medicine doug was
in med school at the
time but i was in philadelphia at temple university which was um where it was a
it was a very large african
american uh you were i was a very large african american i had some corrective
surgery uh no but
the population of the school is largely african-american and i'll never forget
being in the cafeteria
where the live broadcast of the verdict was read and it was me and my buddy jared
and everybody else
african-american and everybody erupted in joy and it was very strange i mean i
had just moved it was
only a few months after i moved there it was confusing of course now we can
look back and remember that
this was coming after the rodney i'm looking at you and i haven't even
introduced the guest
but i'm talking to this gang here people watching tim isn't african-american an
outdated term is it
isn't it isn't it just it's black with a capital b i think i don't know that
well you gotta get woke
come on is it really yeah i think it is yeah i don't think that's what i say
well look and vick
when have you been right right now but i was trying to finish my thought which
is uh this was in
the aftermath of the rodney king horror and it felt that there was this feeling
of payback and revenge
regardless of whether he had done it of course uh we are a country of laws and
the jury said he didn't
do it so what can you do except sue him which he lost and then he had to give
all his money away
is that what happened i think that's what happened with the golf course then he
got arrested again for
selling memorabilia or like robbing it back the guy was a mess yeah well do it
live
i'll let my wife do it but what relief that he's gone because i was always i
have these nightmares
that have been coming in and hacking me to death so we're safe from oj right doug
um yeah we're safe
i never felt too nervous about that i don't i haven't really thought about him
in years
well everyone's talking about and the good news is we've gotten a jump on the
late night guys
so they're they're gonna they're gonna it's already gonna be old news by
tonight
when jimmy and jimmy and seth and everybody has to assemble some bad jokes
about the story um
lance let's welcome you hey back up a sec let me welcome
stand by j doug pound is with us of course uh good morning
let me do something controversial and turn off this system here
okay he's trying to make us sweat we're time for work
victor burger the fourth thank you good morning everybody what sip everybody
what you got in there
a little blood a little menstrual blood and i got a uh water enhancer do you
know what every of these
things there's not there's not a really a water i swear to god they're called
water enhancers
they're they come like in a little uh tub thing and you squeeze it and it goes
in and it's great
what does it do gives it a little flavor okay no more calories it's better than
just
it's better it's a little better than water it's just chemicals it's just
chemicals more chemicals
yeah yeah uh captain carlin is here were you here last week i was not ah wait
no i was no you were
here for game night i was here for game game night game night was available
only to patrons
at patreon.com office hours live become a part of that community now this is
captain we had a great
time it's worth a rewatch we talked about the plumbing sewage incident here we
talked about
so many things we dove and dove into the divorce dad world of randy van warmer
that was great well now
i'm addicted to that song that song is legit great uh it's all right i like it
uh yeah no i don't go
back to it i don't know it's in my head it's stuck in my head it goes like that
uh we'll have a game
from doug later on which is uh called guests the lyrics game i'm excited to
find out vic's got a new
guy oh yeah and everything else oh i always forget to do this and i shouldn't
be responsible for this
that should be producer matt's job but we like to provide a recommendation for
everybody so if you want
to put that in the back of your head it can be a movie or a tv show or a
podcast or whatever we'd like
to do that at the end of the show okay yeah okay i'm ready i'm ready for you
great grandson of the
inventor of the atom bomb okay whose family then changed their name to protect
their identity from
the embarrassment of causing such trouble in this modern day world of ours
lance oppenheim hey
thank you you dropped the ur yeah that's well you you know you're you're
actually not protecting me
from any embarrassment you're only litigating it for everyone to experience i
apologize thank you for
doing i i like full transparency on my show it's interesting it's uh the oppenheimer
movie success
you'd think could be good for um the you know my my uh your brand my movies
yeah it's actually um it's
been pretty terrible you could have been in that movie you know how benny
safety was in that movie
i could see you as one of those scientists with your glasses and everything
what is that the only
thing you're trying to do you look like filmmakers two two jewish guys book
bookish looking you know
yeah very intellectual type i saw someone um uh there i was uh there was i was
doing an interview
and i looked at the comments on this website don't ever do that that is one
unfortunate looking guy oh
come on and there's another comment that said he looks like like one of those
hollywood guys in the 20s
and so well that's kind of nice yeah harold lloyd compliment you look like howard
lloyd especially
you know howard lloyd yeah yeah yeah harold harold i s