Name: Patrick Bet David is a Grifter and a Perv
Uploaded: 2025-03-09T00:35:57.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Patrick Bet David is a Grifter and a Perv' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Patrick Bet David is a Grifter and a Perv' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-09. Transcript available.

thanks for joining us uh of course of course hi guys hi doug hi vic hi eric
hello big big fan
huge fans thank you brown i gotta say i love your opinions and stuff remarkable
i love the charts
that you draw on the on the whiteboard hilarious look before we get into pbbd bbbd
bbb you moron
you should get a menecht bugs bunny should be ah this is what i want to talk to
you about is menecht
this is the greatest thing ever man it's like you have to pay to talk to them
or something yeah
we can help you take that step forward we can even help you take that step back
menecht wait 48 000 for 30 minutes oh my god no oh my god how embarrassing for
adam he's five
500 and tom is 2 000. how much is vinny saying how much is 48 000 minutes 2000
he's just under tom tom's
the big deal look at oh salvator looks like uncle junior oh well you know the
key thing for business
is you gotta always be growing and what i do is i recommend starting some kind
of scam where you
charge people 48 000 for a half hour a year time let's see vinnie i'll do uh
two thousand dollars but
i'll give you three thousand dollars if i could turn you red as a beat the
problem is he doesn't
get that red on pbd because he's so and he's so happy and he's still relaxed he's
just happy to be
there you want to get him on piers morgan or somebody else's show so he could
blow a fuse
blow a gasket pbd gives gives a gift here we go we walked in here you commented
on the batman that i had
outside i want to gift it to you man i just want to hand it over to you and it's
yours wherever you
wanted to get it what a cool we've had it here for almost eight years and every
office i've ran
it's been there i i don't need i mean you're so kind to do that it's beyond
kind
when you came in the reaction i saw because i have my underwater yeah when you
said that i said you
know what i love it i love that it was very innocent sincere so this right here
it's an
official one i'm sure you're going to appreciate it having it i thought it
would be better you having
it than me having it no no that is unbelievably generous all right
congratulations to tony robbins
for getting a giant batman statue it's like taller than him and he's already
like a giant man i bet
i wonder vinnie blew a fuse on that one wait you gave away you gave away a batman
were you nuts
that looks so cool daddy don't tell me you gave away joker now all i gotta do
is all i gotta do is do
a half hour zoom with some dumb numbskull we'll get you another batman in here
no problem that's one
it's me i'm the bad guy you know kissinger he's kissinger i believe henry kissinger
he said a whole
bunch of negative about me wasn't he pro-irac war was he pro-war kissinger i
don't know the exact
schematics of it but there are literal warmongers you don't know the exact schematics
of it what are
you talking about a new new pool house you're designing blown to pieces then
tweeting that i'm
the bad guy what did kissinger say about you oh something like i'm bad and i
shouldn't kissinger's
dead oh oh man adam kissinger or the old kissinger oh sorry henry kissinger is
dead i want to make
sure we was a very heavyweight guy i do not like this uh i do not like this andrew
tate
one of my guys that i was working with his porn started like going from regular
porn then he started
watching and he watched some stuff that one day i walked in on an office some
of the stuff this guy
watched was i don't even want to tell you what he watched but go to what he was
watching and i
looked at this guy i said man you okay watching this stuff well everybody has a
different fetish
this is a very weird fetish bro this fetish is not actually healthy for you and
this fetish is actually
not healthy for society you're going here yeah what's wrong with that a lot of
stuff is wrong with
this you shouldn't be doing this i'm not trying to judge everybody sends in a
different way but i was
trying to encourage him to get away from that what the hell what this is going
on at the valutainment
offices people sit around watching porn yeah get into the office oh hey hey
check this out hey check
this out what i'm looking at in the office is there nothing you should be doing
right now no basically
i just scheduled your 230 minute and that seems to be all i need to do today
let's see what a prediction
uh in the next 10 days you're going to see the epstein file released in the
next 10 days next 10
days oh please you think in the next day the whole thing's going to be released
yeah
and and what kind of information you have to be able to be that certain about
it
uh i plead the fifth in the next 10 days 10 days day number one uh cash patel
walks in by the end of
the day it will be released please conservatives explode at botched epstein
document rollout complete
disappointment okay and vinnie's one of them we were promised the jfk we were
promised 9-11 we were
promised epstein nothing's happening i'm calling business days we're on day
seven this i don't know
if that is in trump's top five list okay i don't know if it's in his top 10
list something very weird
about um this this story i don't know there's something very weird about the epstein
one that
people get very uncomfortable with and i don't know why oh i wonder hey i'm
just asking questions hey
i don't know i like that because it's like all right here we go we're getting
the files
then nothing happens glenn beck makes the prediction a couple weeks later they're
like
yeah it's not even this is not even that big a deal we did get to see vinnie
hot there i appreciate
oh yeah this is the greatest show ever i mean this is better than any snl we
got to put lockers behind
us pdb better than snl after a year and a half of trying to get permits of this
city for the cigar
lounge after creating the sprinklers that they wanted in the ceiling for the
cigar lounge after
getting the tobacco license after getting the alcohol license after getting the
two bar set up after
getting all of it permitted into a club comedy club that's being launched here
soon hey so for those of
you that are wanting to be members of the cigar line of the board there's
already 61 members okay that
it's only 80 of them that we're talking about at the phase one that we're going
through oh my god
here's another building website what did you spend your what did you spend 16
000 on uh it's a platinum
membership to a cigar club you got to go platinum you gotta go platinum i mean
embarrassing company with
a silver am i going to lay am i going to lend am i going to lay down 10 g's for
gold or 16 for platinum
you go plat am i gonna am i going to commit to this or not come on platinum
imagine showing up with a
silver you know left out of that cigar room concierge services i love two boxes
of this is the best
secret access to all areas of the lounge
i think we should go full pbd we go to the top let's play platinum memberships
and and just like
stay there all day every day yeah all three of us hey can we sleep here hey
where the is my concierge
where the is he where's my personal locker i need another cigar we go to the
comedy club and we sit
right in front we're like de niro and cape
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!