Name: Andrew Cuomo Can’t Control Himself!!
Uploaded: 2025-11-04T13:01:43.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Andrew Cuomo Can’t Control Himself!!' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-11-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Andrew Cuomo Can’t Control Himself!!' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-11-04. Transcript available.

how you doing everybody this is uh andrew cuomo running for mayor of new york
okay
how are you doing great are you going to call in and say happy halloween
um how long have you had your nipples pierced excuse me i'm just curious what'd
you say to me
i said how long i don't have my nipples pierced trust me on that then what the
hell is that myself honey look you i'll tell you one thing
you don't talk about me or my family or my nipples keep my name the cuomo name
out of
your mouth i'll keep your nipples in my mouth how about that oh now we're
talking
hey cuomo have you do you have any questions for the musicians we have here we
have some special
uh them hey i listen to that music who's your favorite you're not going to get
any votes that
way mayor what's on your spotify playlist yeah what's on your spotify playlist
i like billy joel
right about it i like dion what the is wrong with dion how come you don't get dion
on the show
isn't he dead oh he's still going dion's around hey hey what do you say dion's
dead
you what's your name doug lucenhop you chicago prick oh you look back to chicago
how do you know this
you you come into my town you come into new york i'm gonna put your jaw on the
curb and
bash your fucking head in that's not hard you too i'm gonna take care of you
two later trust me i'm
gonna be finding out where you live and then what and then what well you know
what you can take
you can you can fill in the rest why don't you fill it why don't you fill it
all right you know
what i'm tired of this lip from you too tired of it will you take us to bucca
to peplo next time
you're here oh you fucking look i'll tell you something you come to my town i'm
gonna take you
out down to chinatown okay i'm gonna take you out for a nice chinese meal okay
hey all right and then
afterwards we'll go up to the clubs and we'll have a good time you know who i
fucking know i
fucking know lauren the fuck lord fucking michael look don't vote for this muslim
whatever his name
is maligatani whatever i got evidence i'm gonna put out tonight this kid you're
gonna put out tonight
for who i yeah i you little i'll tell you something this kid is in isis all
right he's in isis
the dude was on the plane that ran into the world trade center okay
where is actually the name of a guy okay how do you survive the guy was in the
plane how do you
survive that and now he parachuted you much such a fucking thing why don't you
use your head
parachute it out so the voting begins it's actually begun already you can vote
now
and uh i wish you'd vote for me i've been having a hard time i apologize if i
got out of hand with
you i appreciate you and i want everybody to come together wait now you're
apologizing for what you
just said the heart crying hey i'm italian i run i i fly off the handle every
once in a while you
want to give a fucking sue me fuck you