Name: The Mayor Goes to Tim (Allentown Mayor Matt Tuerk), Kay Heidecker (Ep 374)
Uploaded: 2026-02-12T20:23:11.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Mayor Goes to Tim (Allentown Mayor Matt Tuerk), Kay Heidecker (Ep 374)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Mayor Goes to Tim (Allentown Mayor Matt Tuerk), Kay Heidecker (Ep 374)' from Office Hours Live with Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-12. Transcript available.

The Mayor Goes to Tim (Allentown Mayor Matt Tuerk), Kay Heidecker (Ep 374)

Let's get bound, let's all go.
Welcome to My Squirt Room.
I like to lie, I like to meet people who can make me lie.
Hey, wow, we're doing a TV show now.
That's how you start a TV show.
A lot of these jokers have it all buttoned up
and they're trying to put on a professional show,
but it's boring and it drags everyone, everyone tunes out.
We don't do that here.
We make fun of ourselves.
We love, I talk like this now.
My character, people say,
are you doing your character when you do Office Hours?
You bet I am, I'm doing this guy.
Great.
Morning Radio is here for everybody to tune in,
unless you're on the East Coast,
in which case it's early afternoon.
Hey everybody, by the way, I'm Tim Heidecker
and you're watching Office Hours Live.
It is February 12th, in all honesty.
And we are broadcasting live from Glendale, California,
where it is beautiful outside, thank the Lord.
I prayed so hard last night for good weather today
and the Lord delivered.
That's all you have to do, folks.
Get on your damn knees.
And Vic, how long did you pray last night for good weather?
Oh, about 30 seconds and it worked.
I did an hour.
Whoa, okay.
Deep, deep prayer.
Well, let me introduce the gang
while you're just getting settled in.
Pour yourself a hot cup of coffee.
Sit back, relax.
Have a cup of Three Stooges coffee
because we've got DJ Doug Pound.
Good horning.
All right.
Wow, some circular breathing.
I love that one.
That goes on real long.
Yeah, it's a long time.
Speaking of circular breathing,
we're going to look at that Kid Rock video
and determine when he got a chance to breathe
during all that wrapping.
And Victor Berger IV.
What's up, everybody?
And Captain Carlin running the phones
and managing everything down to the,
every, dotting every I and crossing every T,
making sure the show runs fluidly.
The world did.
Here, we aim to please.
In the studio.
I'm going to get right to it here.
We've got a very special dignified guest,
an elected official, current,
we've had former mayors on the show before.
Matt alerted me to that.
But no current mayors,
no really current,
well, we've had,
we've never had a current president on the phone.
Never an elected mayor.
Never had an elected current mayor here.
From the city of Allentown,
the place of my birth,
with me is Mayor Matt Turk.
Thank you.
From Allentown, Mayor Matt.
People are glad to be here.
Thank you.
An honor to have you, sir.
Where, what hospital were you born in?
Good question.
You have a bad memory, Aaron.
I was born in a manger.
I was born in a stable.
Much like Jesus Christ himself.
Which manger?
I was in Bethlehem.
It was actually in Bethlehem.
Wild.
What's the main hospital?
The Allentown?
The one that is a couple blocks
from my house is,
it used to be called,
the old school,
the Dutchies will call it
Allentown Osteopathic.
But that is now St. Luke's Allentown
at 17th and Hamilton.
I will find out from my mom.
She might remember.
I think I was born at Easton Hospital.
That's possible.
My first kid was born in Allentown,
17th and Hamilton.
Second kid was born in
Lehigh Valley Cedar Crest.
I was 17th and Hamilton,
I'm pretty sure.
There you go.
It's a great spot to be born.
We're so happy.
What are you doing?
I don't think so, too.
Who's running Allentown?
The place must be out of control.
There's a steering wheel on the desk.
My chief of staff
is chained to the steering wheel.
She's doing an amazing job.
I'm here for the city,
the U.S. Conference of Mayors
has its leadership meeting.
I'm on the advisory committee.
So I'm here talking about...
We thought you came just for this,
but unfortunately...
I would have.
This is for not...
I came...
Conference of Mayors gets together
to talk about advocacy positions we take.
We're really interested in housing.
I know your guy a couple weeks ago
talked about imports of housing
here in Glendale.
Yes.
But housing's an issue
across the country.
We're talking about ICE
and immigration enforcement.
What do you guys...
When you guys get together,
and gals,
and all sorts of people,
first of all,
look at all these tattoos on this mayor.
This is a very...
I'm getting excited.
We don't have a lot of tatted up mayor.
You're not like that John Fetterman, though,
are you?
Are you going to be like...
No, sir.
No.
What's this...
What happened to him?
A few things.
Head injury?
That's one that I'm not
trying to be political.
I just do not understand
what's going on there.
Something odd.
Yeah.
But what was I talking about
before I...
When we get together.
Yes.
We get together
on a regular basis.
We advocate
for things that benefit
cities and mayors
at the federal level.
We get to...
A lot of it is
learning from each other,
but the biggest thing we do
when we get together
is just vent a little bit.
I was going to say,
bitch about the world,
the country.
It is positive bitching
sometimes.
Is it the feeling of...
Certainly now this year,
this crazy year,
this past year?
Is it a feeling of
we're on our own?
We got to do this
on our own?
Yeah.
So that's actually
a really interesting
take on the idea.
We as mayors...
Cities are the social
safety net, right?
Everything fails
at the federal level.
It drops down to the state.
When the states
aren't delivering,
it drops down to cities.
And when you don't have
a partner in the federal
government,
like we haven't now
for just over a year,
you have to figure out
how to do all these
things yourself.
And affordability
for housing,
for healthcare,
for food,
for gas,
for utilities,
like as that starts
to harm urban residents,
we have to figure out
how to stitch together
something that looks
like a social safety net
without federal support.
So we need each other
to help make that happen.
We learn from each other.
Mayors have like
lots of trite sayings.
They say good mayors borrow,
great mayors steal, right?
We say that about
songwriters too.
There you go.
So we steal from Providence.
We steal from Chicago.
We're stealing.
I'm going to take something
back from L.A. with me.
You steal what?
He steals my weed.
How did you get that so fast?
Now you got,
you said you want to talk
about ICE.
I can talk about ICE.
But you said you could.
You've got ICE
coming into Allentown?
Very limited.
Like surprisingly limited.
ICE hasn't been super active
in Pennsylvania generally speaking.
Because it's a red state.
It's purpley.
Pennsylvania is very purple.
And I don't know
what the because is.
I know that most
of the deployments of ICE
seem like they've been
politically motivated.
But one thing we're certain
is that whether it's in L.A.
or New Orleans
or Chicago
or Minneapolis,
wherever they go,
they're being deployed
in a way that causes chaos.
So that's what
we're worried about.
And the chaos they cause
in Minneapolis
becomes,
you feel that
in Tallahassee
and in,
you know,
in Denver
and in Allentown
because people are just
looking over their shoulders
all the time.
Yeah.
Is Allentown
a sanctuary city?
I don't know
where the hell
a sanctuary city is.
We are,
we passed,
prior to the passage
of a welcoming city ordinance
about a year ago,
I already had a policy.
As soon as Trump
was elected,
we looked at our policy
for collaboration
with ICE.
City of Allentown
Police Department
is not in the federal
law enforcement business.
We don't do
immigration enforcement.
Right.
So we never ask
for a person's
immigration documents.
We just provide service.
Right.
So we have,
we don't collect data
and because we don't
collect data,
we don't end up
sharing data with ICE.
Gotcha.
We can get stronger,
but that's where
we're at right now.
Is Allentown thriving?
Yes.
Thriving is a great word.
What is your pitch?
Bustling.
I haven't been back
in a long time.
I know.
We need you back.
I'm coming.
Well, you have to,
you have to entice me
with something.
Pay a lot.
No, no, no.
I have a question.
Wait, wait.
The pitch to come back
is,
I can't even see Doug
over there.
That's the idea.
By design.
He's not smart.
Tim's just in the way.
So Allentown,
one of the things
that we just,
about a year ago,
we opened a new
1500 seat music hall.
Okay.
It was like,
you might have remember
Croc Rock.
Maybe that opened after you.
Croc Rock?
Croc Rock.
Croc Rock was like,
I don't know that.
Croc Rock was a dump.
The Archer Music Hall.
Hey, it's gone now.
Archer Music Hall
is brand new.
It's a really great venue.
Is it down by the river there?
No, it's up off
Hamilton Street.
It's on Hamilton Street.
So Hamilton Street
has seen
over a billion dollars
of investment
in the past 10 years.
Jesus.
Wow.
Like completely,
you wouldn't recognize
Hamilton Street
from the time
that you were there.
The PPL Center
is an arena
that has
the Phantoms
minor league team.
Sorry,
the Flyers minor league team.
Elton John
I think opened it.
Elton John
opened there
for another band.
I think he kicked off
like one of many
farewell tours there.
That arena
has been going
for a while
and they do
like wrestling
and monster trucks
and stuff
that I'm not terribly
interested in
but they also have
a great hockey team.
But then the smaller thing
is this 1500 sheet
music venue
which has
like Nico Case
played there.
I gave
the Guts of Welcomer.
The Menzinger's
played
a couple weeks ago.
Mountain Goats.
Like bands
that I actually like.
Yeah, yeah.
for 20 plus years
that I've lived
in Allentown
we haven't had
a lot of options
like that.
Rocket Man.
Thank you.
You say Elton John
it's where they're
off to the race.
There we go.
We've got to give you
a do not say list
for guests.
My affinity
well,
the strongest connection
I have to Allentown
besides growing up there
is the Civic Theater.
19th Street Theater.
Yeah, of course.
Were you in?
I was in a lot
of productions there.
Yeah.
And they're still
thriving, right?
They are.
They have a new-ish
executive director
William Saunders
lives right down
the corner.
Awesome guy.
Well, William
he was my true
mentor in life.
Oh, really?
Yes.
Oh, I shout out
to William Saunders.
So you know him?
Very well.
I know.
I call him Bill.
He now uses William.
Okay.
I dined with
him and his awesome
husband, Jason.
Jason's like
an amazing
vegan cook.
So I've been
there for dinner.
But Civic
we love, love, love,
love the Civic.
Well, that's where
I want, if I'm going
to come home,
I'd like to do
something there.
Just putting that out there.
I'm throwing it out.
Let's let William know.
Okay.
How's this doing here?
Let's go get Yacko's.
Yacko's.
Of course I know Yacko's.
Okay, okay.
This is like the most
hot, like if we had
to stay away,
I don't have to stay away
from talking about
ICE or like
Flock Safety
or Donald Trump.
I have to stay away
from like the Yacko's,
Potts,
Willie Joes talk.
Oh, well,
I don't know those two,
but I know the Brass Rail
and Yacko's.
Yes.
And the Brass Rail's
doing, it's open again.
The Brass Rail,
the site of the Brass Rail
is, I can't remember,
I think it's a Wawa.
Actually, it's a Wawa now.
Is it?
So when I was growing up,
we didn't have a Wawa
in Allentown.
We have a lot of Wawa's
in Allentown.
Okay.
And what about Turkey Hill?
There's a Turkey Hill
on 15th Street.
There's a couple sheets,
which I'm not,
I'm not loving sheets.
I'm not a sheets guy,
but so where Brass Rail was
is a Wawa that's opening,
I think in two weeks,
I'm like doing
the ribbon cutting for it.
This is essentially
your job,
is ribbon cutting
Turkey Hills and Wawa's.
Sometimes it feels like it,
but the Brass Rail
is in the farmer's market now.
Yes.
So that is
So is the farmer's market
like Thrive,
is that open like every day?
I will break out my first,
it's fucking awesome.
Like it is open.
We're going to go back.
I know, I'm ready.
You have to go back.
There's Marianne Donuts,
there's Brass Rails there,
there's great Korean food.
I'm talking about the farm.
But it's still like,
nobody can possibly imagine.
The farmer's market is,
I always describe it
as like a plate.
So it's only open
for Thursday, Friday, Saturday.
Yeah.
Saturday at four o'clock,
you go into the farmer's market.
There are 80 year old
Dutchie women arguing
over the price of meat