Name: Norm Macdonald Hosting High Stakes Poker S7E1
Uploaded: 2022-05-07T10:59:11.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Hosting High Stakes Poker S7E1' from Norm and Other Stuff on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Hosting High Stakes Poker S7E1' from Norm and Other Stuff on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-07. Transcript available.

Norm Macdonald Hosting High Stakes Poker S7E1

High Stakes Poker has a new home, a new feel, and some new players to shake
things up.
Is there a joker in the deck?
Ain't no fun when the rabbits get together.
I'm guessing no one has a clue what you have.
But the sharks circling the felt of the Bellagio Poker Suite are up to their
same old tricks.
It's Johnny effing Chan, kid.
I think this game is too big.
Can we make it smaller stakes?
Giving away all your secrets.
I could have like won 10 million.
So much talent.
So much beauty.
So buckle up for the action.
Action and comedy.
What would you prefer?
Drama.
The jams.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'll take it out.
The suck outs.
Show me a queen of spades.
I got a little action in this little high stakes poker season.
And the laughs.
Of Season 7 High Stakes Poker.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm going to kick it.
If you got what it takes, you can play high stakes.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
I'm on.
Welcome to High Stakes Poker, presented by PokerStars.net.
I'm Norm MacDonald.
I am really thrilled to be hosting Season 7 of the best poker show on
television.
You may not know this about me, but I am a professional poker player.
Fact is, I've been killing the $2 and $4 games at Indian reservations all
across this land.
But, now my secret's out, and they no longer let me play.
So, I'm here tonight to share with you my expertise.
This season, we are at the world-famous Bellagio in Las Vegas,
with some of the greatest players in the game sitting at the table.
And I can't wait to see who wins huge and who gets stacked for the minimum buy-in
of $200,000.
The lovely Kara Scott is down on the floor to tell us more about our players,
so let's get right to it.
Kara?
Season 7 of High Stakes Poker is about a minute from getting started.
And the atmosphere at the Bellagio Poker's mecca is electric.
This season is shaping up to be a battle of high-stakes veterans and some
intriguing newcomers.
Familiar faces, Doyle Brunson, Barry Greenstein, Daniel Legrano, and Antonio Esfandiari
will all be here.
But we'll have some new players, too.
Vanessa Selps, who won nearly $3 million this past year, becomes the third
woman to ever appear on our show.
And later in the season, 2010 World Series of Poker main event champion
Jonathan Duhamel will take a seat.
The players know that past accomplishments will not win pots in this game.
Here at Poker's Field of Dreams, only the players with the courage and the
cards who win the big money.
And there's two of the newcomers that Kara was referring to.
Phil Ruffin and Bill Klein each have $500,000.
I'm out. I didn't know that was what we were doing here.
Good luck, everyone.
And the rest have bought in for $200,000.
Somebody's got to have bad luck.
I'm rooting for Bill.
It won't be me.
I'm rooting for Bill, too.
So it's the pros against the zillionaires.
Any man that donates his losses and wins for charity has got my vote.
Vanessa wakes up with an ace-queen firsthand.
Discipline laid down by Barry.
And Croak flat calls with Jax.
Ladies and gentlemen.
And that brings in Klein and also Pete.
I hope somebody gets whacked for $200 on this spot.
Just get things going, you know?
Right, Bill?
Absolutely.
Gee, that's nice to say when you're not in it.
Correct.
There's always a nine.
Croak's Jax lead.
Vanessa fires in a continuation bet.
What is that?
$7,600.
Robert Croak, who amassed a fortune when he created Silly Band.
Is now wondering if Vanessa is just making a silly bet.
So he'll try to find out with a min raise.
Hard to know what Pete's thinking about here on the first hand.
A little spillage.
How much did he throw it?
$200.
$200.
Now Vanessa is trying to figure out what an amateur would raise with there.
She figures he wouldn't do it with a draw, so she probably puts him on a pair
of nines or better.
She'll call and look to the turn.
Five of hearts on the turn.
Five of hearts on the turn.
Vanessa now with the net flush draw.
Croak's studying her.
And Vanessa bets out representing a flush.
Oh, that's such a horrible card.
$28,400.
How much did you start with, Vanessa?
Oh, $200.
Vanessa didn't want to hear that question.
Wow.
You might get your wish here.
She's betting out with a semi-bluff.
Can Croak figure this out?
I had that same wish, but I wish it was Antonio, and then he folded, so.
How do you want to hurt me, Booth?
Huh?
And one for the pros.
1-0 over the zillion errors on that one.
At the wrist, I don't want to offend anybody.
I don't.
If you ask me how much I've got, I don't answer.
I don't get involved in a conversation when I'm in a pod.
Well, if you ever ask me, I'll probably be too scared to answer, so.
And if I had more room, I'd move it.
I'm the same way as Doyle.
It seems like most people, for some reason, especially in the tournament,
how much you got, what you got, how much, you know, I just, there it is.
I just want to know what she started with.
I won't ask, though, after that, yeah.
Doyle getting a little political,
announcing that he's a strong proponent of don't ask, don't tell.
Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
Do you think that's right, Antonio?
Do you think you have to write a man up there?
You got to put the, uh, she got it.
Oh, okay.
No, you think, I think, I do think it's right, Doyle.
I started questioning myself, because it's Doyle, you know?
Doyle's never wrong.
I thought that because I made the mistake,
I thought you said something, and I thought you'd done it yourself.
Me?
It's Doyle's never made a mistake when it comes to blind Zanny's,
and he's never missed a prop.
Ruffin seems unsure if it's his turn.
Especially a big boy, as they call it.
You missed a big boy, Doyle?
Oof.
I heard a story.
Woo-hoo-hoo.
We all have.
Raise it.
And Doyle gets frisky with a raise.
I bet there's one person that probably hasn't.
Everybody.
Everybody has.
I still ever miss the...
This is why I don't play with these players.
7-5 raises, Queen's call.
How am I supposed to know what they have?
If you think he hasn't, that means you haven't played the props he's played.
Yeah, everyone has.
He has left.
Worse than the big boy, don't worry.
Yeah.
Yeah?
Every person.
Antonio's in with the suited connectors, and Ruffin comes along.
Bag it.
You got one more to make?
Yeah.
Four players.
Set of threes for Mr. Ruffin, and this could be trouble for Vanessa.
Antonio, with top pair, will ignite the match.
Call.
And a quiet call by Phil Ruffin.
Call.
Now, Doyle's got the gut shot, but I don't expect him to stay frisky with this
hand.
And now, Vanessa.
She's trying to figure out what to do.
I've got to believe she thinks she has the best hand right now.
So, she's going to raise the 63,800.
That's more than enough protection for her queens against an ordinary hand or
draw.
But...
Make it 100.
There's an extraordinary hand, and look at that.
That's okay.
Ruffin wants in that hand immediately and plays out of turn.
That should be a big signal to Vanessa.
Make it 100.
Makes that easier.
I'm sorry.
You're raising school.
Alarms have to be going off for Vanessa right here.
You got raised.
Viffer, translation, you're beat.
You have a good hair?
You have a period?
And Vanessa starts to talk.
I haven't looked yet, so...
She's fishing for information that Ruffin just gave her with that raise.
But do you like your hand?
It's okay.
It's okay?
Mm-hmm.
But not super amazing?
God, I didn't expect that.
I have to say, I didn't expect that.
What could she be thinking?
Tenzer Jack's the only hand she's a big favorite against.
All right, I'm on.
Call.
Snap call.
And she knows she's dead now.
Yep.
Nice hand.
Vanessa looks like she's in shock.
Do you want to run it more than once, or...?
No.
No?
He might not know what running it twice means,
but he knows if Vanessa asks, it's a bad idea.
Nice hand.
I would call that a super amazing hand, actually.
It's a good time for her.
What was I doing in that box?
A club club.
Yeah.
And Vanessa looks like the dejected amateur,
and Ruffin looks like the...
That broke the world.
...com pro in this one.
That was you.
Two outs.
Nine-ten of diamonds.
And High Stakes Poker Season 7 is officially started
with a pot of $475,000.
Nice hand, sir.
Nice hand, sir.
Played it well.
Oh, you made it straight.
I guess by you played it well, she means she played it awful.
I have another $200.
Okay.
Seat feet.
Those silly bands weren't so lucky, after all.
Money is on its way.
Welcome back to High Stakes Poker.
On that last hand, we saw Vanessa stacked with her queens.
She tried to explain it to Kara.
The hand that you don't want to talk about is a hand with Phil Ruffin.
The queens versus the threes.
When you're looking at him and talking to him on the flop,
what kind of information are you trying to get from him?
Well, I was really just trying to get him to say something about my hand.
I mean, I had the pot got bloated because Doyle made a big raise preflop,
and there was a lot of action.
And I decided to flat call Doyle,
which sometimes I re-raise there, and sometimes I'm going to flat call.
You know, if I flat call, it can be really profitable.
And then when it's four ways, Antonio leads out.
I know he can lead out with a really wide range.
And when Phil flat calls, you know, I'm hoping to get value
because I've heard that he's, like, a less experienced player.
And so I'm hoping to make a raise and get some value out of my hand.
When he then re-raises me on the flop, it's a very strong line,
especially when an amateur takes it.
So I was a little bit conflicted.
I was trying to get any information,
and then, you know, he told me he had an okay hand.
But do you like your hand?
Okay.
I put it in based on the information that I had,
and it just happened.
I don't know.
Well, he told her he had an okay hand.
Well, that makes complete sense now.
Yeah, if I didn't leave it.
You nearly go back.
No, I've been when I got broke.
Eight and eight.
Yeah.
Well, she's going to bet if he checks.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, I would have bet.
How are you going to call?
I'm going to bet.
Oh, you're going to bet.
Yeah, I guess, yeah, the only way you get involved, right,
if you bet and she just calls.
And under the gun,
Vanessa had a pretty good game.
Kline finds aces.
What else?
If I check, she bets the 17,000.
David Peet will come along with jack 10 suited.
Well, okay.
Doyle says it.
I believe it.
Well, with no, with no flush draw,
how are you ever going to call 17,000 with a gutter?
Total.
And Ruffin calls,
so Kline's aces in very good shape.
In that spot,
I don't think you're going to win.
All I'm telling you is most of the big props
he played the last time he played.
Whoa.
Check.
Pairing a flush draw for Pete.
I think some of these young kids
think they invented gambling, Doyle.
They don't know they'd do that.
Kline makes the bet with the aces.
They built a better mountain.
Could see some fireworks here.
Expect a raise from Pete.
And there it is.
Me.
Sorry.
And Ruffin acts in turn for a change.
So it's bad to Kline.
Now, he's hoping that Pete has a hand
like King-Queen.
Raise.
Decides to find out.
Yeah, I mean, every pot's gotten flooded.
Every pot's getting big.
Raising it to 60.
Raises it.
Yeah, there's an alternate.
To 67.
And now, Pete is thinking.
There's never a shortage of players
for high stakes program.
All he's really thinking is,
is he up against a set?
Everybody wants to find high stakes.
He's looking.
Yeah.
Against anything else,
he's in good shape.
I'm all in.
And Pete goes all in.
And Kline starts thinking again.
Didn't expect that.
You've heard that before.
That's what I say.
That's what they always say.
Everybody's double parked.
Everybody holds exactly still
as long as they can
and say, ah.
Call.
And he calls.
It doesn't take us long
to get to our second
400,000 plus pot.
It's going to be
unclassic coin flip.
Run it once or twice?
This one.
And the pro asked the
zillionaire to run it twice.
I love that one time,
you know, just punish.
No again is the answer.
