Name: Driverless Car Conversation - Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2022-03-22T16:45:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Driverless Car Conversation - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Driverless Car Conversation - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-22. Transcript available.

All right. Driverless car convention. Oh, conversation. Dear Billy Front Wheel
Drive
in the snow. I work for an engineering firm that has a big contract with a
large tech company.
We work on a small part of driverless technology. I won't get into the weeds,
man, of the tech or
the problems, but I would like to comment on something that hits close to home
with you.
Nerds. Those evil nerds you talked about years ago are out of control. You are
way ahead of
your time on this one, Billy Bright idea. These guys come to conferences and
investor meetings
and they espouse the most maniacal shit. To put it simply, they speak about the
world as if it were
their spare bedroom and they want to redecorate. Isn't that fascinating?
Because nerds have really
been like glamorized. They're like these harmless fucking people. I think they
can affect more people
than a meathead. Where a meathead just sort of destroys what's in front of them.
And these guys,
nerds can reimagine a whole fucking society here. This one guy came in and
started telling everyone
that choice was a privilege and that tech is going to remove that choice for
the greater good.
To hearken back to last, I mean, what in the fuck? I mean, that is just, that's
one of the most insane
things I've ever heard. And as always, that's why I'm telling you, standup
comics are a distraction.
All of this shit where they get offended by standup comedy and comedy late
night and films and shit,
it's all just a fucking distraction. Choice was a privilege and that tech is
going to remove that
choice for the greater good. To hearken back to last week's email on the topic,
you will have no choice
but to ride in a self-driving car and take the route it wants you to take. Joy
riding would be a thing of
the past. It's not just private nerds, it's the government too. They have their
hands in how all
of this will get rolled out. Fuck these nerds. Driverless cars would be amazing
for people who can't
operate a vehicle due to disability or age, which is why I don't completely
hate my job. But forcing it
on everyone is fucked up shit, Bill. Love you. Love the podcast. Yeah. And the
bottom line is,
is if the fucking politicians can line their pockets enough with it, they'll
tell us it's a good thing.
And I don't know. I don't think that that's something that you can sell. I like,
I feel like
the right, that's going to be hard for them all to get on board with that. You
know what I mean?
You take the average like fucking redneck out there. I mean, that guy can turn
a lawnmower
into a fucking usable car. I mean, those guys are amazing. So I mean, and there's
nothing they like
doing better than fucking riding down the goddamn road, you know, all over
their property, nobody
telling them what the fuck to do. I don't think they get on board with that. I
think the liberals
get on board with that one. We all, and by the way, I'm not trashing liberals
because we all get on
board with dumb ass shit at some point. There'll be each year, the amount of
wildlife that gets killed
by people driving cars. They'll get on it somehow like that. Um, all right. Badass
thing. I shouldn't
own professional video. Well, here's one for you. If everybody is microchipped
and somebody kidnaps
your kid and puts them in the car, then you know where the car is. And then
they could tell the car
to drive the police station. That's how they'll sell it to you. Uh, bad. That's
why you should
microchip your kid and have somebody else drive your fucking car. Cause nothing
bad will ever happen
except we'll control every decision that you ever make.