Name: F1 (with British accent) 03/21/2022 - Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2022-03-25T16:30:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'F1 (with British accent) 03/21/2022 - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-25. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'F1 (with British accent) 03/21/2022 - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-03-25. Transcript available.

jesus christ a buddy of mine sends me a tech message and he's like moto gp was
great this
week you might want it but you got to check out the f1 the f1 was incredible
all right so i'm
thinking oh my god this we got some racing we got some racing going on we got
some passing we got
all of this shit going on right and i'm watching the race and it's great ferraris
are out front i
don't know why they're maroon now but i'm enjoying that max verstappen's out
there you know that perez
guy's driving for red bull i'm a little behind in the sport so i'm like oh wow
some shit jumbled
around you know daniel ricardo's all the way in the back of the race because he's
driving
some fucking shitbox ever since he left red bull which is my problem with that
sport is it's really
the team that you're with is is is bigger than the driver's skill because when
ricardo was with red
bull he was getting podiums all the time he was winning races he was drinking
out of his fucking
boot you know now he's in the back of the race it's the same driver different
team you know so anyway
speaking of which i'm watching the race and i'm like look at mercedes
struggling lewis hamilton
fifth sixth place the whole fucking race right and i'm like all right this is
good finally some new
fucking blood you know i know mercedes will get the car dialed in this is good
right so we get to
the end of the race john leclerc ferrari fucking first place the other ferrari
driver is in second
place max verstappen is in third and perez is in fourth and lewis hamilton is
in fifth all right and
they're driving there's like five fucking laps to go all of a sudden this guy's
car catches on fire
lewis hamilton is completely out of the race and out of podium right fucking
guy's car catches on fire
they got the new rules they do the fucking restart whatever the hell it is now
he's in the leader
group and i'm like here he comes here he comes the rich kid is fucking fucking
the richest car out
there oh for fuck's sakes i'm not answering that um yes i still have a house
phone um do i need to
answer something to answer that ah trying to reach me for my car's extended
warranty we've been trying
to reach here hey a car they said you're a robot fuck off okay let me guess you
have a diamond mind
that i can invest in and then you'll cover my muffler um anyway uh yeah he's
like in fifth
fucking place they get to like the second to last lap all of a sudden max verstappen's
car just dies
just fucking dies nobody passed anybody it dies so now lewis hamilton is in
fourth place he's almost
on the podium and i'm thinking how he's gonna pass perez here we go and he can't
because his car
fucking sucks right so i'm like oh great the rich kid finally having a tough
race i get to watch him
pout one of my favorite things in the world watching lewis hamilton sitting in
his car with his helmet on
acting like the world just ended because he didn't get on a podium i i'd say no
it's the little
things in life ever since i saw that i saw botas be a teammate for him and then
like six races later
it's like five years ago the exact same scenario was presented where lewis
could have hooked up botas
and he's just like yeah no i'm not doing it and i was just like you're a cunt
fuck you that's it i'm
done with you right so now there's one lap to go lewis hamilton cannot catch up
with perez and by
the way ferrari is going to be one and two for the first time in like 46 years
at this race announcers
could give a fuck they're doing what they always do screaming and lewis hamilton
is now in fourth
place right swear to god the guy's voice is that high they get to the final
fucking lap the other
red bull car just dies it goes around and turn the engine just fucking dies and
he wipes out
and lewis hamilton and the announcers oh my god this is incredible what a race
who would have thought it
oh lewis hamilton is now in third place he made lewis hamilton makes the podium
screaming the whole fucking time guys coming in third place they said lewis hamilton
more than
they said ferrari's one and two and then they told me it was an incredible race
not because ferrari went
one and two not because lewis hamilton passed two red bull cars on the final
two fucking laps because both
cars fucking died and they're so excited that the goddamn golden boy gets on
the fucking podium it
was the and my buddy had the balls to tell me that that was a good race then i
get to see you know
what he's like he's like the cunt in every coming of age 80s movie except in
the end he's still banging
the cheerleader ah would you ever think you could get this worked up about
people driving cars
you know what it is it's just it's just they were acting like he passed
somebody he didn't pass anybody
it's it's the same reason that i don't like the nba i don't like the fucking at
least when daniel
stern was running it and he used to just rub his balls he'd paint his nutsack
purple and gold and
just root for the lakers to make the finals every year like openly like well
date not daniel stern
that's the actor david stern what's your dream finals oh the lakers versus the
lakers uh then they
have a mobbed up ref who helped the lakers get there but stern wasn't involved
no not at all not at all
that guy ran a nice tight ship the whole time he was there that that league
wasn't finessed
whatsoever yeah yeah the nicks won the lottery in 85 and got patrick ewan absa-fucking-lutely
absolutely i'm buying all of that i'm buying all of that you know the kevin
garnett trade oh yeah
they made total sets and all of a sudden i don't know you know with this the nba
needs you know it's
just the ratings are down let's just get the lakers and celtics going again let's
just give them that
finals two years in a row okay sounds good dial it up um no one can tell me
differently i literally
heard an nba player one year when they lost in the playoffs he goes yeah we
just didn't fit their script
he literally said it and people still sit there and act like that the most
easily manipulated
game out there oh look at that great player he could do some damage today there's
two quick fouls
and out of the game you go um all right sorry anyway lewis hamilton is in third
place
can you believe it it's unbelievable what a race it was fantastic it was
brilliant spectacular he came in third place
i don't know what's more hilarious to me watching those announcers screaming
about lewis hamilton
getting third place in a race or watching vladimir putin score a goal in a
pickup hockey game i don't
know what is more ridiculous to me um or to use the great dennis miller's uh
reference uh elvis presley
look at that i was so worked up i hit stop on the record um the great dennis
miller's reference uh
watching elvis presley do karate dennis miller had this amazing joke one a long
time ago and one of my
favorite stand-up specials of all time the black or white special black uh no
the off-white the off-white
album no that was the album i think it was the black and white special i forget
what the oh my god i'm
fucking old it was like 30 years ago so he had this um and i have to look it up
that's going to drive me
nuts um he had this joke saying so and so deserved something about as much as
elvis presley deserved
his black belt um oh black and white all right that was a stand-up special that
was it yes um yeah mr
miller goes to washington and that two huge specials for all young billy burr
when i used to watch stand-up
comedy so um anyway it was still fun though um you know i and by the way for
all you lewis hamilton
fanboys i know that guy is amazing okay and i know his story is amazing it is
amazing okay without a
fucking doubt okay but i just you know jesus christ the guy came in third place
all right he didn't just
cure covet oh my god it's unbelievable lewis hamilton just went through a drive-thru
and ordered a big mac
and he got the fries oh this hurt my voice lewis hamilton i drive my wife nuts
when i watch the the
fucking the races because all i do is scream acting like that fucking guy i'm
yelling at the golden boy lewis
hamilton and the silver arrow of a mercedes he's in ninth place all right i
have to stop doing that
it's just hurting my fucking voice um some fucking screaming about men driving
around in cars
i literally got off my couch like you got to be fucking kidding me when the
second one the bed and