Name: F*ck Zoom Calls - Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2022-05-03T16:00:13.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'F*ck Zoom Calls - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'F*ck Zoom Calls - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-05-03. Transcript available.

Okay. Sorry. Keep yawning. Sorry. I'm old. All right. Zoom, everybody. Hey,
Bill. Hey, man.
He's talking about Zoom. This is like the Zoom meeting, or she is. Hey, man. I'm
sick of Zoom.
I don't want to jump on a Zoom call if I can make a phone call and people are
really starting
to lean into it because they're sick of their boring desk jobs and need face-to-face
to liven
up their afternoon. I recently... Yeah, I don't get that. It's becoming that
thing, though,
if they can't see you, it's like you're not on the phone. It's like I am on the
phone.
All right? I'm just going to sit here with my eyes closed as I listen to you.
I bet all corporations, they're all going to start every... Like, it's all
going to be video
conference because we want to be able to read your face. We want to see what
your face is doing,
scan your face, scan your retina, all of that shit, and just see if we can see
any inconsistencies
in the level of loyalty that we demand here as we deliver soul-sucking
information and instructions
to your side of the room. Anyway, I recently told someone I don't have Zoom and
opted to get on
the phone. The reaction over email was loud and clear. They passively,
aggressively made it seem
as if we couldn't accomplish what we needed without it. Fuck the Zoom. Also,
why am... Why is it assumed
that I have it? Hey, bitch, come over to my house and install it or get the
fuck out of my email.
All right. That was a lot of anger in there, but I understand what you're
saying. Yeah. The Zoom calls
and all that. I got a couple people that are in the corporate world in my life,
and it just seemed...
Like, I just don't understand, like... I don't feel like corporations value
their employees as much
as they're just like, we're just going to just burn them out, burn them out,
burn them out, burn them
out. We don't care about the turnover or anything. We're treating you like shit,
and we're getting every
ounce of fucking work out of you that we can. And when you leave, we don't give
a fuck,
because we'll just get someone else to replace you because we've destroyed all
the mom and pop places.
I don't know. That's just my opinion. And I feel like the Zoom call is another
way for them to
like gain information about where you live, how you're living, you know, your
commitment to the
thing. The whole fucking thing is just creepy. But on the other side, I love a
Zoom call as opposed to
like if I was in the corporate world and you had to go to Hong Kong, it's like,
why can't we just
jump on a Zoom? We're still face to face. What is the fucking problem? You know,
pollute the
environment less. Like, I think that that's a good use of it, I would think.
But, you know, if you guys
are just, you know, living close by and this guy just says, hey, man, I just
want to be on the phone.
I don't look at you. Why can't you just say that? Listen, I don't like doing
Zoom. If I'm going to be
on the phone, I want to be on the phone. I don't want you to sit there looking
at me. But I think what
they... Maybe that's what they like about it. Maybe they like the fact that you
can't act like you're paying
attention when you're not. Because you can fucking mute Zoom and you can mute a
phone call. But when
you mute a phone call, they don't know what the fuck you're doing. I mean, you
literally could be
doing anything. You'd be asleep. And they wouldn't know. And I don't think that
they... I think that
they like the control of Zoom. And I got to be honest with you, it would be
nicer if it would be... The world
would be a better place if more people kind of rebelled against shit like this.
At least push back
a little bit. Anyway.