Name: Mistook Fan For Karen - Bill Burr
Uploaded: 2022-07-14T16:00:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Mistook Fan For Karen - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Mistook Fan For Karen - Bill Burr' from Billy Twinkle Toes on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-07-14. Transcript available.

oh man i yesterday my life was like the tail of it was the you know it was it
was the balance of
the universe i just had like a great morning and then the end of the day just
ended up being
totally fucked up like listen to this shit last night i go down to uh lago and
i do a spot
and um and i'm not gonna lie to you i was up there i was being an idiot but
like you know
a lovable idiot just saying dumb shit right i was up there i was talking about
you know
fucking whatever you want to talk about i was talking about it and i was being
a fucking idiot
so the show ends and a buddy of mine and a woman that he knows they were there
so we hung out and
we shot the shit for like 45 minutes right so as i go to leave um i come
outside i go out to the
parking lot or whatever and uh you know somebody said oh there's a couple
people waiting for you
out there so i figured it was you know fucking star wars fans you know somebody
out there with like uh
you know princess leia dress or some shit i don't know what the fuck was gonna
happen so i walk out
there and i just see two regular people so i figured they wanted a picture so i
go hey how you doing i
enjoy the show and the woman bows her head and she goes i didn't and i just go
well guess what i don't
give a fuck i go jesus christ there was eight other fucking people on the
fucking show i'm so sick of
this fucking bullshit just you know the whole fucking world's going to hell you're
gonna get
mad about a comedy show what are you fucking standing there for 45 i'm walking
to my car doing
this what are we having a fucking exit interview i get in the car and i drive
away and she stands still
standing there with a giant boyfriend and i'm thinking like she's gonna throw
something in my
car whatever and i drove away i was like what the fuck was that jesus fucking
christ right so
somebody works down there calls me up he goes uh yeah listen i think you had a
misunderstanding
uh last night with an audience member uh she said you missed herder
i guess i am so fucking embarrassed i think when i said did you enjoy the show
she said i did but i fly helicopters and play drums and i heard i didn't and
then i just fucking cursed
around and i left i am so fucking embarrassed or maybe because i heard she was
the one that shushed
the drunk in the crowd and when she shushed it was really quiet in the crowd so
it was a joke i'm
like why are you shushing they can't get any fucking quieter in here i'm
eating my red balls up here right so maybe she said i didn't and she was gonna
say because there
was some drunk guy who wouldn't shut up next to me i just like yeah so we're
tracking her down
oh my god i mean this is like a bad sitcom episode you know yeah i thought you
said left i went wow
it's zany so i mean how do you make up for that i'm gonna have to go over a
house and fucking man
the grill at a cookout you know is that that hack from comedy central yes it is
what's he doing you
know him no he just told me to go fuck myself after a show when i was hanging
out to ask if i could get
a picture why would he do that because he can't hear anymore so my apologies to
that woman and her
giant boyfriend who should have fucking body slammed me on the hood of my car
um yeah so that happened
uh but the beginning of the day was great people i'm going to track her down i'm
gonna find her i
still remember what she looks like even though she had a mask on i still know
what she looks like
um oh my god my buddy who also plays drums he heard it the same way
so we were just fucking going off on her though talking on the phone the whole
ride home
he goes what the fuck do these people expect
two fucking deaf guys walk out of a club she bowed her head like i thought she
was going into that you
hurt my feelings thing then i'm just you know i i mean i don't know it's like i'm
fucking sitting
here i'm looking outside and all the trees are all turning like brown really
quickly and the weather
that's going on like these fucking weathermen like i don't know like what kind
of drugs are they on
as they're doing the weather and they're not literally screaming at the fucking
camera
going guys what are we doing stay home today or or some what we got to solve
this global warming thing
i mean like tomorrow today i guess when this podcast comes out it's going to be
like dangerously hot
in so much parts of the country right and uh that's where my thought goes when
someone complains
about like a comedian's act you know i was at the gym today right and on every
tv screen they have
cnn on and i'm just sitting there going like i'm trying to get away from this
shit and feel like
i'm doing my hindu squats shown to me by andrew themilis i'm up to three sets
of 25 get really winded
feel good about it though right now everybody's googling hindu squats in the
background they're
showing footage of the armed swat team that came in to stop some school shooter
and they go this is
going to be graphic just to let you know if you're really sensitive and evidently
the sound was down
but evidently you could hear the screaming children in the background and i was
just looking at it going
like how do what the fuck what does this do for anybody other than try to get
another psycho out
there to do some shit like that and then secondly they're actually making money
showing that fucking
footage it's the worst fucking thing in the fucking world those 24-hour news
networks whether they wear
red ties or blue ties and that shit is fine right no one gives a fuck about
that but i go down and do
one bit about fucking x y and z and all of a sudden i got somebody standing in
an alley that i misheard
um anyway um i will not rest until i find that woman and apologize to her face
i feel so fucking
horrible about that hopefully you're listening i apologize i thought you said i
didn't you know and
i'm not gonna lie to you you were a white chick so i was like oh here we go
here we go oh fucking
you know oh kathy cul-de-sac is gonna come here with their fucking feelings and
i'm gonna have to
listen to this bullshit you know i i mean i said a lot of you know take it back
i mean i i went pretty
hard last night you know but i was being an idiot all right what did i talk
about last night uh you
know what you talked about um anyway uh but my new stand-up special bill burr
live at red rocks
uh directed by mike uh came out um yesterday two days ago if you're listening
to this on thursday
or i guess you will be because that's when it's going to be posted and uh
evidently it's it's it's
doing great i'm very excited and uh i want to thank everybody for watching and
uh i also got nominated for
an emmy so thank you to tyler falbo uh the roku network and everybody go out
and watch a moral
compass i don't know why i got nominated because i'm gonna tell you right now
al madrigal and uh and
vince vaughn with bobby lee i mean for my money you know that's where it's at
on that thing so uh who
knows maybe because i was wearing a wig he really reached deep down for that
character um so anyways
thank you to the brilliant tyler falbo and everybody else that worked on
everybody over at atc mike
bertolina everybody uh that worked on that thing and roku for uh picking it up
when quibi went under
i really appreciate it so there you go it's all freckles it's gonna go to an
award show and this
time i think i might actually be at the award show as opposed to when i was at
the when i hosted the
online segment of the grammys jesus christ if you knew the amount of fucking
money that i blew on that
fucking suit just to be on the internet you know maybe that's why i snapped at
that woman
you know maybe it was a little negative juju hanging around from the haberdash
over there
um so anyways that was my day oh my god i am like fucking mortified about that
interaction i had with
that woman i gotta i gotta fucking make that right i'm gonna make it right all
right i'm gonna find i'm
gonna find this person this is like a tom hanks movie isn't it you know it's
like a sleepless in
seattle but it was uh shitting on him in fucking seattle accidentally shitting
on him it's gotta be
alliteration is that why they never did a sequel to sleepless in seattle
married in minnesota
married in minneapolis divorced in denver they could have kept going with that
no one wants to see tom hanks
get divorced not tom and meg how about uh domestic
domestic violence in vancouver um we're gonna do a reboot all right