Name: #254 - Apocalypse Olympics with Abby Martin | The Tim Dillon Show
Uploaded: 2021-05-30T04:00:17.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video '#254 - Apocalypse Olympics with Abby Martin | The Tim Dillon Show' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-30. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video '#254 - Apocalypse Olympics with Abby Martin | The Tim Dillon Show' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-30. Transcript available.

#254 - Apocalypse Olympics with Abby Martin | The Tim Dillon Show

ladies and gentlemen welcome to the tim dylan show happy memorial day thanks
everyone uh for your
service um what does memorial day mean to you so much so much correct now the olympics
are
happening in tokyo where we think i'm we i'm wheezing when i go to breathe
i don't know what that is but it's not
i it would make a lot of sense if i got this right at the end like after i've
been vaccinated
a month after this is all over i just dropped dead like i made it through the
entire thing i went on
the road i was not taking it seriously i barely wore a mask finally get
vaccinated memorial day
everything opens back up i dropped out of it when it's not even a news story it's
not even in the top
five news stories i just pass away from covered tokyo is learning that the only
force stronger
than a pandemic is the olympics olympic organizers say games must go on tokyo
is getting hit
in japan the population has turned against the olympics one poll found a
whopping 83
percent opposes staging the games this summer 83 percent nevertheless japanese
prime minister yoshida
suga tokyo organizing committee president seiko hashimoto and international olympic
committee
president thomas bach insist that the show must go on he goes ioc the olympics
committee their
spokesman mark adams went as far to say we listen but won't be guided by public
opinion that should be
the quote of of of everyone in power anywhere we listen but we won't be guided
by public opinion we're
listening but that's where it ends it ends at listening um so they have a state
of emergency
happening right now because of coven and hospital capacity is a problem and
they're in some other
some type of lockdown i believe and they're gonna do the olympics um there's
also militarized security
measures including surface-to-air missiles ratcheted to the roof of an
apartment complex to fend off
terrorist attacks
that's nice
they want you know olympics brings in a lot of money for they had they were
thinking about la
for the olympics in a few years and everybody was like no because they had to
move the homeless people
for the academy awards and they got upset they go well can you only imagine
what will happen to the
homeless in la if you have the olympics i say let them compete but no one has
thought of that compromise
um first of all and i'm wearing glasses now because the lights we're in the
middle of getting a new
studio here and the light the lights are so oppressive that they hurt my eyes
and i'm getting ready for the
miami bitcoin conference uh don't even want to tell you who we have it is so um
monumental and it's going
to be wild uh guests we have several guests several of them are trying to pull
out as we speak because
we're handing others and we don't know it's a real behind the scenes you know
musical chairs up there to
see who's going to sit with us at the main stage uh when saturday saturday at 4
15 saturday 4 15
the main stage of the convention tim dylan show podcast with guests
um so this is interesting first of all the way i have felt about when is the
last time you watched the
olympics oh man probably phelps right do adults still watch the olympics does
anyone care can we stop
pretending that this matters in anyone's life this is not diplomacy anymore
like this idea that it's like
it's sportsmanship and it's diplomatic and it helps international relations to
have people it does it
that is do the palestinians have a delegation and the israeli and that's going
to matter
if israel and palestine play volleyball is that really going to matter i
understand at a time
potentially but right now i think things are at the point now where no one
cares anymore about this
adults do not watch from i mean children watch it my dad and me used to watch
it we used to watch
uh the olympics because people had fun names like peekaboo street that skiing
or or there was a speed
skater named hey chavo we liked that um and you'd watch it with you you know i'd
sit there with my dad
and we'd eat hagen daz ice cream and and uh and fast food and we'd watch the olympics
um and then you know
they would have all these inspiring stories of people but the stories now have
gotten so hellish
they've gotten so disturbing that and first of all have you ever met anyone
that like
got close to the olympics or qualified for the olympics and went and didn't
place like these are the most
destroyed people you'll ever meet like my friend's sister like went to the olympics
in volleyball like
nothing happened and she just i mean the woman is a wreck she's just like a
tall beanstalk of a woman
and we'll we'll tell people like she went to the olympics but nothing nothing
came out of it so
it's it's it's it's only nice if you're winning a medal truly otherwise and it
used to be like oh
you know she was the youngest of six kids and she used to ski going down the
stairs like they were
like heartwarming stories about the olympians like she used to put on you know
she used to take her
brothers uh you know uh skateboard and pretend that they were it was a snowboard
and she would go down
the stairs and and then she became the greatest skier now the stories because
life has gotten
harrowing the stories are so horrible now that you're not you you're just
worried about the people
that are in the olympics it's like too much of a pressure cooker bring up that
article i told you
about this this article listen to this by the way this is listen to this this
is the title of the cnn
article depression drove her close to suicide now olympian raven saunders wants
to quote destigmatize
mental health um and and good for her but the idea that she was close to
suicide and then she
discovered the shot put is troubling since returning from the 2016 rio olympics
her mental health had
spiraled sitting at the wheel of her car her mind was now drawn to a dark place
from which there seemed to
be no return as she circled past a drop off along the mississippi highway the
urge to veer off the road
towards the towering trees below was almost overwhelming this is nice huh this
will be a nice montage they do
just have her sitting in her car they'll recreate it they're like can you take
us through the route
where you thought about driving off the highway we want to film it we want to
have like a little
compilation before you go up and and lose it was like no one really understood
the pain and the
challenges i was going through saunders who placed fifth in the shot put this
is what i mean if they if if
they go and it doesn't happen it's curtains it got worse and worse and worse
and worse till it all boiled
over i remember in the morning just going through the motions kind of being in
a daze having things to
do but not really having any motivation or any care to really get anything done
then hopping in my car
and driving and looking at that spot a few months before saunders had
considered how the chances of
survival would be slim if someone was to drive off the edge of the same drop-off
she now circled past
however it was an impromptu text to a former therapist really a last-ditch
effort that saved her life
she soon received the response was it better help providing her with the reassurance
and courage to
go home and get the help she needed today she's preparing for the olympic
trials in june with the
prospect of her second olympics looming she wants to quote destigmatize mental
health and help others
who like her can get caught up in cycles of depression and anxiety so these are
the types of
stories you're going to hear at the tokyo olympics i mean if you think i mean
there's not going to be
any more cute like you know stories where it was like you know this athlete you
know we always knew
they were special it's going to be like i wanted to hang myself and then
i decided that my only hope was synchronized swimming
i had an eating disorder for many years where i would vomit up everything that
i ate
but then i realized that that positioned me perfectly to be a synchronized swimmer
and and i like it because
only my legs that show and the rest of my body's in the water because i still
can't look at myself
without wanting to purge but i can look at my feet and those are the only
things that come out of the
water i keep them perfectly pointed i mean get ready for the tragedy like you
have never
i mean it's going to be and it used to be like they were athletes and it was
like you know great
athletes that had like worked their entire lives at being athletes now it's
just going to be people
who you you're worried about and you don't think they should you actually go we
don't think you should
go we don't think you should do this like after i read that i go i don't know
if you should do this
this might what happens if you lose again what happens if she comes in and this
time she comes
in seventh it's back to the car isn't it that's a problem she's going to be
driving on that same
stretch of highway it's going to be sad and now with covid i mean there's going
to be like some memorial
in japan to covet which people are still dying of covet by the way osaka is
getting
yeah they're getting ravaged so what they're going to do is like you know like
it they're just going to
like they're just going to release like you know those lanterns into the air
and one represents
everybody who is still in a hospital bed it's going to be it's going to be very
strange olympics
i think we don't need it we can skip it who believes no one believes that they're
going to be in the
olympics by the way like no one gets like very few people get into the olympics
nobody like my mother
was a swim coach and i think a few of those people got to the olympic trials it's
very very tough to get
into the actual olympics it doesn't motivate anybody it might you know but i
just don't think it it
matters anymore it doesn't really matter anymore and i don't i don't remember
the last time anyone
i know has said did you see the olympics i don't care i don't root for america
i don't care who wins
i don't really care i mean that's the other thing does anyone give a if your
country beats another
country no one really cares anymore we've gotten soft here we're probably going
to lose and aren't
these people all junked up anyway aren't these a bunch of drug addicts i mean
they have to they have
to test them like nine times to make sure they're not like skin popping
steroids in the locker room right
before they get in the pool aren't these little junkies anyway i mean we've
just created a race of
junkies to perform these people some of them have natural talent but but
everybody's doping that's
what the olympics is it's a bunch of it's it's like a bunch of lab rats doping
and i don't i don't get
inspired by it is my point i'm uninspired by the olympics i don't need it and i
don't know why you
need it but it's it's a it's an antiquated idea i understand that people think
it's important but it's
not just leave it alone that's my take on it i don't need to see a bunch of
drug addicts run around and do
hurdles i can skip that and i think you should too and i don't need all the
stories about she was raised
by a single mother in the bayou you know and now she does hurdles good good
moving on like i just don't
i don't need that it's going to be and here's the other thing about destigmatizing
mental health you know
i'm let me say this at the risk of offending anyone can we destigmatize people
who aren't mentally ill
because i believe they are getting a lot of pushback right now in society the
people who are
not insane i feel like are having a much tougher time of it mentally ill people
and not real mental illness like my mother has like schizophrenia but i mean
mentally ill seems to
kind of be a little bit of the benefit in certain industries certainly the one
i'm in can we perhaps
destigmatize people who don't want to kill themselves is that okay is it okay
that someone
doesn't want to kill themselves anymore well can we destigmatize that
experience in life
people who don't w