Name: "Bros" | The Tim Dillon Show #318 (ft. Greg Stone)
Uploaded: 2022-10-09T00:45:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video '"Bros" | The Tim Dillon Show #318 (ft. Greg Stone)' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-10-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video '"Bros" | The Tim Dillon Show #318 (ft. Greg Stone)' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-10-09. Transcript available.

"Bros" | The Tim Dillon Show #318 (ft. Greg Stone)

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show. I'm here with an old
friend of mine I have
not seen in how long? 2002. The towers were up last time I think I saw you. Is
that true?
I think, no, they were coming down at the end of the conversation. There was,
there's no way the towers were up. No, no, no. There's no way. 2016, 18, 18, 17.
I don't know.
I haven't seen you in a minute, but we were very close and we had a lot of fun.
Yes, so much fun.
City. Yeah. I'm so happy we're still friends. Yes. And it's good. Things are
good. Friendships
are hard. Yes. But I had a phone number of yours for three years. I've been
texting you. Three
years I've been texting you. Still not getting back to me, Tim, just to find
out that it wasn't
your number. It was not mine. And I was consistently being like, oh, if you're
not texting me back,
I'm going to keep texting you more, Tim. And just being like, all right, you
piece of shit. Wait
till I see you. Yeah. And then Mike Feeney was like, dude, that's not his phone
number. Yeah. No,
I would have texted you back. And you have a kid now and a wife and you're a
very funny
comedian, Greg Stone. Thanks. Those of you who don't know. Yeah. And it's good.
It's good
to see you. You look great. Thanks. You know, diabetic. I lost 13 pounds. 13.
Very exciting.
I'm hiring a trainer. I'm trying to go in that direction. Yeah. Yeah. You
should get Rogan.
We're going to do it. I'm going to train you. I'm scared. Get that guy. That
will severely damage
our relationship. If I have to be accountable to him, that'll be the end. Why?
Because he doesn't
fuck around with that. He doesn't kid around. He's serious. But that's what you
want. Yeah,
I know. That's what you want. I want, I want a trainer who's like, yes, but I
also realize you
are, there's other things you got going on. Yeah. Like I want that kind of
trainer. I want a
trainer who's like, you're going to fucking get ready. But also, but also you've
got, you have a full
plate. This new movie, did you see bros? I don't even understand. I missed
everything. I don't even
understand what it is. I was told that I'm not allowed to see it because I'm
straight. I don't
even, I didn't know it was a gay movie. It's a gay movie. It's a gay rom-com.
And it, what happened?
It bombed. It's Billy Eichner. It's someone else. I don't know. They tried to
do, they tried to do a
movie about just dudes fucking. Okay. And America did not come, and I don't
think it said America's
homophobic because the birdcage did 185 million worldwide. Brokeback Mountain
was huge. But this,
this movie, for whatever reason, has done 4.8 million opening for bros is so
low that it also
means many LGBTQ viewers didn't show up because everyone's gay now. Yeah. You
can't blame straight
people because if you go on the internet, everyone's kind of gay if you look at
their bios. So they
also didn't do, see this movie. I didn't even know in there, I didn't even know
what it was or
existed. It was called bros. I thought it was about bro dudes. I didn't know it
was about gay guys.
It's about a gay guy who's a podcaster. It's about a podcaster. That's why no
one went.
Yeah. It's about a podcaster and a dude who's kind of like a jock. And they
meet up and they're
not releasing it in the Middle East because there's graphic sex scenes. Oh
really?
Yeah. There's some graphic. Here's the thing with a movie like this. It's got
to be so funny.
A movie like this has got to be so funny that you have to be the, you know, the
dude to suggest it
to your other friends and not seem gay. Right. So the movie has to be so good
that you have to go,
guys, you know, because it'll never be easy to do. I think you bring someone, I
go, we got to go see
bros. Right. There's not a laugh and it's just men fucking. Your friends go,
well, now we've learned.
Now we've learned something about you. You've come out. Thanks for telling us.
What you have to do with
this? Cause it would start where it's like, you would, you would literally have
to be like,
Hey man, you know, maybe, maybe we'll go see a movie. You know, it's like a
bunch of dudes and
they're like, they're all sitting there and you got to go, Hey man, like, uh, I
don't know what's
out, you know, uh, maybe, uh, there's something, uh, what about bros? And they,
one of them's going to
go, isn't that the gay movie? That's your moment. That's your moment. You have
to hit them with
bullet points. You have to be like, no, no, no, no, no. They're like, dude,
aren't they sucking
each other off for two hours? Go, no, no, no, no, no. It's, it's so funny. And
he, Steve Martin's
in it or whoever, like you got to have so much star power in that one movie.
You guys be like, dude,
did you see the trailer? It's fucking hilarious. Look at the trailer. Like it
has to be so aggressively
good. So funny. So funny. Just to get through. You have to actually, you'd be
like, or you have to
like fuck a girl in the theater as you're watching it. Like, yeah, this is cool
too. You gotta be like,
listen, I was fucking my bish the other night and you know what she wanted to
go see this movie,
bros. And now she's left town, but I figure we're all together. Right. I'm here.
We're here.
Maybe we'll go see bros. And, and the, the thing is, it's really, so they've
spent an estimated 30
to 40 million to promote bros. Cause it's everywhere. If you look, I know it's
hard now.
So you haven't even seen any of it. I saw one sign that said bros and it was
two guys. And you know,
I thought the movie honestly was about, I thought it was about straight guys
pretending to be gay or
something. I was like, Oh, are they doing this? 2006? Like we didn't hear about
the me too.
Like real like unwoke. Like it's like the Sandler movie. What was it called?
Adam Sandler. That movie
where they pretended to get, I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry. And it was
like, who was it? It
was Kevin James, right? And James Sandler. And they pretended to be, they
pretend to be because he
wanted to bang. What's her name? With the great ass. Sorry. Yeah. I'm about to
say. Yeah. It's my
show. You're allowed to say anything you want. What's her name? Anyway, Justin
Timberlake's ex-wife.
Jessica Biel. Yeah. So it's, they pretended to be gay. And they were firemen.
Yeah. They were
firemen. Firemen can't be gay. So we were thinking like, I was, I was wondering,
it's like the marketing
in this. Number one, the, the thing bros right there, B-R-O-S with the thing
like this. You have
to market this very differently. Right. This cannot be marketed as like, Hey
everybody, it's a gay movie.
You have to market this as a fucking hilarious movie where guys fuck in it.
Like there's a
there's graphic sex in it. Yeah. Dude sex. And it's gotta be so over the top.
Like dude
sex can be really funny, but it's gotta be really over the top. What's it about?
Is it
just gay sex? So we'll, we'll try to get the, uh, gay sex. Right. No, I, I
think it's, it's
about. Are they brothers who are gay? That might be a problem. It's about here.
Hold on.
Uh, go, go back for a second. Bobby, a neurotic podcast host. Who's happy to go
on Tinder dates
and content not to have a serious relationship. That all changes when he meets
Aaron and equally
detached lawyer who likes to play the field repeatedly drawn to each other.
Both men begin to show their
vulnerable sides. If you go see this, you are gay, right? You're coming out.
Sure. Like the description
of that, if you're paying money to see that movie, you're gay. I tell you, they
call it the gay movie
or the, you're the gay test. Yeah. Making more money. Yeah. Bros was a bad name.
No, this, if this is,
you're a gay movie. If this was like any other type of movie where it's a guy
like me, who's a garbage
man in Staten Island and who has to tell his fat wife, he sucks cock. Yeah. And
she's throwing shit
at him and calling him. She's like, you're a faggot. Yeah. That's a movie
people watch because they go,
and then you can sneak in some disgusting, you know, not that gay sex is
disgusting, but I mean like
it should be in a comedy. Right. Gay sex in a comedy should be funny. Sure.
Just like straight
sex in a rom-com should be funny. Yes. Like it shouldn't be like hot. No. I
think any sex in a
comedy should be kind of like what's going on. I would argue this though. I
would argue that if you're
going to put a sex scene in, you, they've yet to do this, put in a real super
hardcore. Yeah. Fuck scene.
into a comedy. I'm saying, come on your face. I think this is that. Really?
Supposedly. I don't
see this. Yeah. I think it's so graphic. Really? Gay people aren't going to
watch it because
they're turned off. It's too gay for me. How graphic. Your gay voice is a gay
Latino. It's too gay for me,
poppy. That's too gay for me. It's so much fucking apparently. And I don't know
because
Billy Eichner's come out and said, listen, you're all homophobic. You didn't go
to see it. Now here's
the thing. Respect to Billy Eichner. You're not a big celebrity. Sure. You did
Billy on the street.
It's to show people watching taxis. He, what does he do, right? He runs around
and he's like,
doesn't, isn't this his show? He's like, Hey, I'm on the street, everybody. And
who are you?
I don't like it. It's very mean. He's a mean guy. He walks out of the street
and he says, Hey,
I don't like your hair. They go, what? He goes, you're a bitch. And he leaves.
I'm like,
this is not a show. It's like a show that legitimizes hate crimes. You go, oh,
you punched that gay guy. Yeah. That's all the whole show is, is he chases
people on the street.
And you answer fast. Yeah. He goes, what's going on with you? You know? And you're,
you're like,
I don't know. What are the three branches of government? You're like, I don't
really know. Like,
yeah, he's like, all right, you ignorant pig. And then he just runs away.
And so he's the guy. So listen, this, let me read a review here. This is not a
movie for teens of any
age. It's basically soft core porn of any age. Teens of any age. Well, euphoria,
which is the
biggest show on TV. Fucking great. And it's a great show. I love that. I've
always wanted to be in
that as some unimportant thing. I'll edit you in thing. Can you set a man? We'll
just do some scenes
and I'll put you in it. Now you're in it. I've always wanted to, just so I
could like stand next to Jacob
the Lordy and just be like, it's another day on the, you know, it's another day
for guys like us,
you know, just something stupid, but it's soft core porn, right? It's a very
like, so now this goes,
it's not a movie for somebody, by the way, brought their teens to bros and is
very, very angry about
this. Some parent said, we're going to bros. I don't know how that happened.
They walked in and
they're like, we're going to browse. Yeah. This is not a movie for teens of any
age. It's basically
soft core porn. Why would you let your 16 year old watch a movie with fairly
graphic orgies,
gay or straight are standards for what is considered appropriate entertainment
for teens
has reached a new low. I don't know if this was marketed to teens. And then the
next person under
goes hilarious and raunchy. I'm going to go see this movie and see if I get
some lift. It's very
exciting for me. I don't know what's going on here. I don't know how graphic it
is.
It doesn't matter. Yeah. I mean, let me tell you this after you get married.
Yeah.
You become gay. You become everything. I am. I am. It's like prison. You know,
people go to prison. You have to figure out, I will fuck anything. Yeah. And I'll
do it. And I
watch these things. I try to test myself to see where I can go sexually, what I
can watch.
I'm going to go to this movie. Just, and I'm going to try to jerk off. Yeah.
See what happens.
I love this article. It goes, bro's review. Billy Eichner won't play nice for
the straights.
It's like, why is everything so angry?
I know. It's annoying. It's like, why is everything so just make a really funny
movie and sneak some
graphic sex into