Name: A Victimless Crime with Yannis Pappas | The Tim Dillon Show #359
Uploaded: 2023-09-02T22:14:21.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'A Victimless Crime with Yannis Pappas | The Tim Dillon Show #359' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'A Victimless Crime with Yannis Pappas | The Tim Dillon Show #359' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-02. Transcript available.

A Victimless Crime with Yannis Pappas | The Tim Dillon Show #359

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show.
Day 68 of the SAG-AFTRA strike and the WGA,
America in Crisis, Hollywood Insider,
someone here that can help us make sense of this time.
Help us make sense of it.
Giannis Pap is the host of, what is the name now?
Giannis Pap is Our.
So Giannis Pap is Our.
Yeah.
Help us make sense of this time because here's the reality.
My mother's last wish, she's dead.
When she was dying, she said before she died,
just pay the writers.
That was her final, that was the last thing she said.
She goes, just pay the writers.
She goes, just pay them.
Yeah.
She jumped ship when they turned on Trump, right?
On Fox?
She didn't want to live in a world
where Tucker Carlson was not on television.
Right.
Here's what I will say about my mother.
She got out at a decent time.
She had a great run of America.
It was a good run.
She did.
Like, that generation.
Ironically for her, the Obama years were great for this area,
for the country.
And then, yeah, Trump inherited a very booming economy, you know?
Yeah.
She lived through a time where she made a lot of excuses for Trump and Cheney.
A lot of rationalizations.
Well, what did Obama do for the economy that made it so good?
He was no drama Obama.
All they could get on him is that his wife has a dick.
Who doesn't?
Do you believe his wife, do you believe he's, as we all...
Big Dick Mike?
No, but let's be honest with you.
If I told you Obama was gay, let's be very honest.
Yes.
Would you be a shocked man?
Would I be shocked?
If I said Obama's a bisexual, you would be shocked.
He smokes Newport City, plays basketball.
I'd be shocked.
Why would he, why would it shock you that he's gay?
Do you, do you look at that...
I'm shocked he's got a white mom.
Do you look at that relationship and think that that is genuine?
Absolutely.
Really?
Yeah.
What is that based on?
Black love.
It's based on RMB.
I mean, it's just so crazy.
It's just so crazy to me.
I don't have a gaydar like you'd got.
What do you think?
But everyone I talk to that says...
And listen, by the way, I'm pro that.
Right.
I'm pro him being gay.
Right.
And I'm pro Big Mike.
I'm the progressive.
I'm actually the progressive.
Everyone else...
The Republicans are trying to dunk on him because they hate gay people.
I'm a gay person who likes gay people and thinks it would be pretty fucking
cool if we had a gay president and a trans first lady.
Here's the only thing I don't understand.
If Michelle Obama is Big Dick Mike, as it's...
If she is...
Big Mike, don't make it vulgar.
Well, no, they...
Is this off YouTube already?
Is this off YouTube?
Is probably off already, right?
No, this is what she's called in the hashtags.
Okay.
On Twitter or X, NWO.
Yeah.
Since Elon went Hollywood Hogan.
Yeah.
If Michelle is Michael and those Dick Bounce videos are true, you never watched
the Dick Bounce videos?
Oh, I have.
And by the way, can we ask what's going on?
Well, this is what I'm skeptical of.
Why is she free-balling as a transgender woman?
Good point.
Don't they talk?
Good point.
Don't they at least wear Tommy John's?
Hey, credit where credit is due.
Yeah.
Why is she not wearing boxer briefs?
Why is she wearing 1997 boxers?
If you think some days you think you can get away with it.
Right.
But she knows she's going on L and she's going to have to dance.
Why would she pick that day to wear old school boxers?
If the Bounce videos are real, she's packing.
She's got a nice cut of meat.
She ain't Irish.
Yeah.
If the Bounce videos are real, she's not an Irish Catholic.
She's packing.
Yeah.
Listen, all I'm saying is this.
I don't have a problem.
Like, Abraham Lincoln is rumored that he had a very close relationship with his
friend.
Yeah.
I was about to say, not his wife.
Yeah.
So, like, does that make him not a good president?
I don't think so.
It makes him bi.
So, maybe Obama was bi.
Maybe he's not.
Maybe he's a straight guy.
Yeah.
He did say, and I'm sure you've said this as a heterosexual man.
He did say in a letter, I make love to men in my imagination.
You know that.
That is a letter that Barack Obama wrote to an ex.
I make love to men every night, but in my imagination.
I've never said that.
As a heterosexual man.
Have you said that ever?
No, I've never thought it unless the guy has taken a lot of hormones and looks
exactly like a girl.
Because, by the way, which is not, that doesn't even count.
Hey, I'm fooled.
You know what?
But here's what I'm saying is that I'm not basing this on nothing.
The quote is, I make love to men daily, but in my mind.
I don't know what that means.
That might mean I make love to men daily, but in the imagination.
That might be something he's just saying to seem cool to get pussy.
Right.
Is that how men get pussy?
Who knows?
Did he want to be an actor before he became a politician?
It's very possible.
I don't know.
And I can swim.
It's a good stick.
So if I turn up in the East River, we know what happened, Mike.
But I'm just saying we have to get more evolved about how we look at people.
Are you suggesting that his hot chef drowned in the two-foot pool because an
affair between Obama and him was about to come out as you put your cool Moe D
sunglasses on?
I don't know.
I'm just saying if I was fucking a hot chef, and by the way, it would be lovely.
Yeah.
If I had a hard-bodied chef who paddleboarded every day in my pond, and then
one day that chef came to me and said,
you got to be who you are.
I'm telling everybody about our love.
That person would be done.
So whose fault is it?
If that story is true, whose fault is it?
The chef.
It's the chef's fault.
You keep your mouth shut.
I mean, you know, it's like they say in Scientology, this is for sucking, not
for talking.
Is that what they say?
That's what they say.
Is that really what they say?
That's what they say.
Wait a minute.
Yeah.
What's his name?
David?
Miskovich.
David Miskovich said to Tom Cruise, remember, this is for sucking, not for
talking.
We have your audit.
We know what you think about men.
We know what you like to do.
This is for sucking, not for talking.
Right.
Okay.
Yeah.
Is it a bad deal what Scientology did for those people, by the way?
Not at all.
It's not at all a bad deal.
Not a bad deal at all.
Right.
It's a nice deal.
I think Leah Remini's a rat.
She is, technically.
She's a rat.
And I said it before, all of them get famous.
They all participate in that thing.
The Sea Org.
They torture the other people.
They have to work 20 hours a day, whatever it is.
And then they decide, once they're famous and rich, they're not into it anymore.
Because, you know why?
Because Scientology goes, we want your kids to be in it now.
And then they go, no.
Yeah, that's when they grow a conscience.
They've gotten everything out of it that they can.
That's when they decide to grow a conscience.
It's like asking a murderer to give an apology at court after he's convicted.
Right.
And he goes, I'm sorry.
It's like, you should have been sorry before you did it.
To me, I'm like, they did what you wanted to do.
They went to Tom Cruise and goes, listen, we know what you like.
And the reality is we can protect you.
We can protect you for decades.
You could be the biggest star in the world.
We just will create an alternative reality of who you are and sell it to this
country of people.
And Tom Cruise said, great, let's do it.
And maybe John Travolta did.
I don't know.
I don't know.
It's not my business.
And they were repackaging an old blackmail apparatus, the old confession, right?
You do the audit.
So the Catholic priest goes, come to confess.
And then they go, okay, we know all your dirty secrets now.
So you're going to have to turn the other way while I go on this date with this
seven-year-old.
Right.
Don't say anything.
And then the audit, similarly, you do the audit.
You tell all your dirty secrets.
And Scientology goes, now we got a vault of all the guys that you slob.
And so now, remember, this is for sucking, not talking.
I told the priest when I was 12 years old, when I was 13, I said, I'm having
these thoughts and feelings I don't understand.
And he was like, why don't you keep them to yourself, you fat fuck?
That is tough.
Yeah, that was a straight priest.
That's a rare.
You caught a rare one.
Yeah, that's like an albino tiger.
It's rare, yeah.
Well, here's what I will say about this writer's strike, which we are, America
is in crisis.
We're not getting out.
It's like, it's going to be a long time.
It's like the Afghanistan war.
Here's what happened.
David Zaslav, Big Daddy Zas.
Yeah.
Ted Sarandos, Teddy.
Greek.
Donna Langley, I believe NBCUniversal.
These are all my best friends.
This is so strange for me.
I think I actually heard through the Greek grapevine that Ted Sarandos loved
your interview with, what's his name again?
I think his name is.
Who?
He's from Austin.
He's a little famous.
Rogan?
No.
He liked that one, but he liked more the one with Alex Jones.
Alex Jones.
Yeah, probably.
Yeah.
Ted Sarandos was going, let's put that on Netflix.
I think, but by the way, he definitely does.
Oh, he's into it.
Here's the thing with a guy like that.
In private, he's into it.
Yeah.
Because here's what people don't realize about life.
It's really boring.
Yes.
It's actually incredibly boring, especially if you're rich.
Yeah.
It's really boring.
That's where drugs or the show come in.
Ted Sarandos is so bored.
He's so bored.
What's he going to do?
Buy another house?
Stare at a few more dolphins?
Marry another black woman.
So when someone goes, hey, maybe Michelle's got a hog or something, he's tuning
in.
Probably.
It's not more entertaining than that.
It does not get more entertaining than that.
It's fun.
Yeah, it's fun.
It's just fun.
Yeah.
They had a meeting with the Writers Guild.
Everybody was hopeful about this.
I spoke to people that, you know, that represent me.
They go, yeah, this is coming to an end.
This was about a week ago.
The AMPTP, whatever it's called, that's what it's called.
They sit down with the WGA negotiating team.
Now, the WGA negotiating team is hardcore, like old Brooklyn Marxists.
I respect them.
It's like Adam Conover, guys like that.
They don't give a fuck.
They don't want to hear nothing, right?
They want, they want, it's like grapes of wrath time with them.
Respect to them, right?
They're doing their thing.
Everybody's playing their role.
So you got them, and then you got Big Daddy's ass, and the crew.
And Big Daddy's ass, David Zasov, is very offended at how mean everybody has
been to him
because he decided to pay himself a quarter billion dollars because he thought
he was worth it.
Now, by the way, if you don't realize your own worth, who will?
No one will.
I mean, if someone is deciding their own salary, what are they going to do?
Short sell themselves?
I mean, it's crazy.
It's genuinely crazy to expect David Zasov, Big Daddy's ass, which that's a
brilliant merger,
Warner Brothers and Discovery.
Because people, they go, why doesn't Warner Brothers have more investigation
discovery?
And so he goes, for thinking of that brilliant idea, he paid himself a quarter
billy.
He's very offended at how nasty people have been to him.
He's very offended at how directly they're going after him.
He goes to a college to speak.
They're booing him.
They're chanting, pay the writers.
All of these billionaires are upset at how personally this has been, this has
gotten personal.
It's gotten ugly.
So the AMPTP meets with the WGA and goes, you have to take our offer.
You have to take this offer.
And it just falls flat.
The WGA is like, get the fuck out of here.
The WGA now is refusing to meet.
There's no new, there's no new meetings on the books.
How do we solve it, Giannis Papas?
How do we do it?
How do we change it?
I don't know.
This is kind of like the rush of Ukraine.
It kind of feels like our military operation in Afghanistan.
It's going to go on for a good decade or two.
Yeah.
Whoa.
Yeah.
I just don't think it's going to end.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
I just think that it's, I don't