Name: Bastard Radio | The Tim Dillon Show #372
Uploaded: 2023-12-02T17:00:21.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bastard Radio | The Tim Dillon Show #372' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bastard Radio | The Tim Dillon Show #372' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-12-02. Transcript available.

Bastard Radio | The Tim Dillon Show #372

but I can see you having, like, a spot one day in Mexico
that you go to and enjoy.
Instead of going to Jamaica all the time.
He thinks it's Puerto Rico.
Yeah, you can tell people it's Puerto Rico.
But I can see you having, like, a nice spot in Mexico.
Can't do Mexico.
Really?
Why not?
The only reason I like to travel is to eat good food.
Interesting.
And Mexican food is just, like, the best Mexican food is in America.
Is that true, though?
Kind of.
Maybe.
I agree with you.
Like San Diego and San Antonio.
Yeah, dude.
The best street tacos I've ever had in my entire life.
San Diego.
Incredible.
Yeah.
And I got sick in Mexico.
Twice I've been in Mexico, and I got sick both times.
Interesting.
Eating fucking whatever.
Or eating the ice.
Is it because the meat is just not a good quality?
Or the water?
I think it's the water, dude.
I think whatever it is.
And I think you've got to be used to the bacteria and shit in the water.
I don't know, dude.
I just...
Just seems kind of fucking low rent to me.
Yeah.
Well, there's that.
It was a suggestion.
But you're right.
You're right.
They're monsters.
I have.
I've moved on from Jamaica, though.
I mean, I still go to Jamaica.
Where is the new spot?
Maybe Costa Rica.
Interesting.
Costa Rica's a shit.
Interesting.
Nick, have you been to Costa Rica?
No, I've only been to Puerto Rico.
But I...
Puerto Rico sucks.
No, Puerto Rico's awesome.
I think Puerto Rico's, like, the perfect...
You know, it's close.
Right.
You can go to Puerto Rico for a fucking weekend, and you're not going to feel
like, oh, there's
all this extra stuff I could have done.
Right.
You got it.
No, you didn't.
There's no extra stuff.
You go to the beach, you go...
There's, like, there's three blocks of downtown Old San Juan that you can look
at, and then
that's it.
There's nothing else there.
There's cockfighting, and, like, maybe, like, there's this, like, bootleg
jungle that you
can go to.
What's good about Puerto Rico is...
The Yomke Rainforest?
Well, it's funny because...
It's like fake.
Yeah, well, I guess they tell you, they're like, Puerto Rico's, like, a natural
island,
so it doesn't have any, like, big, like, animals or flora fauna or whatever.
But I'm like, is that how islands work?
I felt...
Isn't the Galapagos Islands, don't they have, like, the biggest turtles in the
world?
Huge iguanas.
Yeah, I think Puerto Rico just kind of sucks.
They have shitty animals.
They have shitty animals.
Like, their whole thing is, like, this frog, and you go into the jungle.
The koki.
Yeah, the koki, and you go into the jungle, and the whole time the tour guide's
talking
about, like, they're building up this frog that's on all their branding.
Yeah.
And...
There's how much it sucks.
It's a little fucking tree frog.
It's just a little tree frog.
And we get to the end of the walking tour in the jungle, and the tour guide's,
like...
Okay, so...
And now we'll show you the frog.
And there's, like, a tree stump that's open.
They're like, be quiet so we don't disturb it.
This lady looks into the tree stump, and then she's like, okay, he's not...
He's not here.
There's no...
Yeah, it was all leaves.
It was basically, yeah, we saw a different type of...
Well, half of Puerto Rico is that...
It's...
I forget what it is.
It's either St. Regis, the Dorado.
Is it Four Seasons, St. Regis?
They have, like, this, like, development for people that want to pay 4% tax
rate.
So, Logan Paul, Jake Paul, Peter Schiff, that guy who's, like, the economist
who's...
All of the people that don't want to pay federal taxes in the U.S., they pay,
like, 4%.
Yeah, the Ritz-Carlton Reserve, it's just a bunch of rich people that go, like,
they pay 4% taxes.
There was also, like, Bitcoin guys trying to turn on Puerto Rico.
That main guy, Brock, what's his name?
The one that'll, like, go after you if you...
Lesnar.
No, no.
UFC guy, right?
No, Brock Pearson or something.
He was in, like, Mighty Ducks.
He was a child actor.
I can't remember the story, but him...
Brock Pierce.
Brock Pierce.
He was a child actor.
I think he was in Mighty Ducks.
I can't remember.
But he was...
Got caught up in this scheme in, like, 99, 2000 with this guy who was, like, a
pedophile.
He was in Mighty Ducks.
Yeah, so he was...
He got caught up in this scheme with this other...
It was him and two other guys, but one main guy was, like, he ran a production
company
that Bryan Singer invested in.
Ooh.
That would, like, convince young boys...
They did, like, real world with 12-year-old boys, but then they were, like, raping
the kids
and making child pornography.
And the one guy got caught, but Brock Pierce, like, I guess, kind of skated.
So on Twitter, like, then Brock Pierce, that was his story.
He was in Mighty Ducks, and then he got caught up in this pedophilia thing.
Is this kind of...
Is there proof to this, or is there some lawsuit coming?
No, no, no, no, no, no.
This was, like, 20 years ago.
I just want to know.
No, this is, like, pre-Pizzagate stuff.
Okay.
This was back, like, Hollywood is filming.
Is this, like, that open secret documentary?
Yes.
Yeah, I think this is part of that's in there, but...
Den, D-E-N.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I get this.
Right, yeah.
Marth Ancier.
Yes.
Right?
Yeah, yeah.
Ancier, and then...
Gary Goddard, maybe?
Gary Goddard, maybe, sort of.
Kind of.
There was a guy named, like, it wasn't Mark David Chapman, but he had a name
like that.
He was, like...
Mark Rector.
Mark David Rector.
Mark David Rector.
Mark David Rector.
Damn, your brain still works.
Yeah, dude.
I saw this documentary.
I couldn't remember the name of Argentina yesterday.
Okay.
I kept saying Argentinian.
Yeah, I don't remember that stuff, but white pedophiles, I remember.
Damn.
How did you pull the Mark David Rector?
Because that's in the...
There's a whole documentary called An Open Secret.
When was the last time you saw Open Secret?
Oh, I don't know.
Seven years or whenever it came out.
Yeah, well, that's what I mean.
You remember a name from that.
Yeah, I'm good at it.
Who was the agent?
Mark Weiss?
Which agent?
There was an agent that was, like, that's the one that's mainly featured in
there.
That I don't know.
But I know that documentary came out and it was ignored.
Everyone in Hollywood ignored it, but it was damning.
It was incredibly damning.
It was a kid sitting in a drive-thru of, like, Del Taco calling these guys
going,
why did you rape me?
And they were like, I'm sorry.
Yeah, right.
I was to die.
It was crazy.
Yeah.
Literally, he's like, remember when you raped me?
And they're like, hey, come on.
Mm-hmm.
Stop, you know, we had fun too or whatever.
Yeah.
And he's, like, sitting in a drive-thru.
Yeah, no, the documentary's insane.
But when that came out, people would go after Brock Pierce,
who had reinvented himself as a Bitcoin guy.
Yeah.
And he's, like, somebody...
Me and Nick should give the tours of Puerto Rico.
You just hear this.
There's a bunch of people sitting there like, fuck the frog.
We're like, it's pedophiles.
It's Bitcoin.
Well, Brock Pierce was offering, like, $50,000 bounties to anybody
that could, like, unmask whoever was calling him a pedophile on Twitter.
Interesting.
Which means if he's paying that much to get the information,
he's paying that much to have this person fucking killed also.
So he's got a lot of Bitcoin.
He was, like, an early investor.
Yeah, he bought on the dip, is what you're saying.
Well, that's the thing, is because he's, like, the whole point,
when Bitcoin started, people were like, oh, this is for pedophiles and drug
addicts.
Right.
And then fucking, so pedophiles and drug addicts were like, well, I guess I
need...
Because it's our dark web.
Money on the dark web.
Was it all dark web originally?
And it's, well, that was the, that was the...
The thought?
The thought.
That was the use case for it, was buying drugs or child pornography.
You want to get someone killed.
Oh, I want to get hired.
I hit man and kill my wife.
So the worst...
Pay her in Bitcoin.
Pay him in Bitcoin.
The worst kinds of people you can imagine.
Yeah, somebody trying to kill their wife or a pedophile.
Those were the de facto early retail investors.
The early adapters.
And then there had to have been somebody that, a lot of them,
there's now a whole world of secret millionaire pedophiles
who couldn't figure out how to use Silk Road,
who bought Bitcoin to buy child pornography,
then couldn't figure out how to use the Tor browser.
And now they've found the thumb drive.
And they all live in Puerto Rico.
They're like, oh, literally, they all move there.
And they're all in Puerto Rico staring at that frog,
going, I wish you were a kid.
Yeah, right.
They're like, I don't want to, they're like, I, you know,
I don't want to pay taxes on this.
You know, I just, I just bought this shit years ago.
I love the idea of being a pedophile.
You have the Bitcoin and you can't use the browser.
You're just like, and you can't call tech support.
Well, Tor is kind of hard to use.
I imagine.
Yeah.
But I mean, it's like,
that's the idea that you can't just call someone over and go, hey.
There's no geek squad.
I don't even know.
Amazon customer support.
Right.
How are you doing, Mr. Brock?
Yeah, I'm good.
Listen, I'm a pedophile.
And I, I figured out how to buy the Bitcoin,
but how do I use the Tor browser to purchase child pornography?
Oh, Mr. Brock.
Yes.
Okay.
I'm sorry you're having trouble with this, Mr. Brock.
We want to thank you again for being an Amazon Prime subscriber.
And happy holidays to you.
We will look into that.
Those guys are the best.
Yeah.
And so I was, I was, I was saying that like somewhat recently,
but I remember how mad,
and I don't think it's that like xenophobia has went away.
Yeah.
Remember how fucking irrationally mad people were at the Indian,
like customer service department?
Oh, anybody who doesn't speak English at all.
No.
I get furious.
Well, maybe you're bad.
Like nobody, because in my mind I'm going like, why would you?
Why would you put this person on the phone?
This is the only thing they have to do.
It's like a prank.
Well, this is my point.
It is putting them in the line of fire sometimes.
This is my point though.
But the Indians are very friendly.
The Indians, everyone would get mad at the Indians,
but now nobody complains about it now that it's the Filipinos.
Oh yeah, the Indians are much better.
No, the Indians are much worse.
Wait a minute, than the Filipinos?
Nobody complains about the Filipinos.
They're so much better.
Dude, if I call any customer service and they hear an accent,
I hang up immediately and I call right back and try to get a white person.
What makes the Philippine, and by the way, this is off YouTube, right?
So go watch Nick's special.
What makes the Filipinos so much better than the Indians?
Literally just calling you Mr. or Mrs. your first name.
Okay.
Because then it makes you feel like Donald Duck or Mickey Mouse.
And then, you know, it's like, it's so disarming.
Okay.
I just, I think the Indians have gotten better in the time that they've done
this.
They were really terrible.
Like, they'd be like, hello, my name is Josh.
But now they've gotten, I feel like, better and they're more.
Well, yeah, I feel like they lie about their names a little less.
They have to.
Give them fake names.
That's woke culture.
That's one of the positive benefits.
Indian customer service people no longer have to lie about their names.
Is that true?
Did we start already, by the way?
Yeah, we've been doing this for 20 minutes.
Oh, wow.
Nick just does real good bits in life.
Yeah.
What do you think?
We're all enjoying each other's company?
I thought we were going to be talking about Puerto Rico with no ad revenue and
no money.
I thought, I thought, sitting here talking about Puerto Rico.
I thought there would be like, and we're starting, you know.
Well, we all know, everyone knows who everyone is.
We'll introduce everybody.
But we haven't been here before.
Right.
The new studio?
It's a studio in New York, yeah.
It's nice.
I