Name: Names On Paper | The Tim Dillon Show #376
Uploaded: 2024-01-05T03:37:37.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Names On Paper | The Tim Dillon Show #376' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Names On Paper | The Tim Dillon Show #376' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-05. Transcript available.

Names On Paper | The Tim Dillon Show #376

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show being recorded the day
that the Epstein names have leaked and we're playing.
I want to play a little clip here from the good people at NBC who are always,
you know, incredibly focused.
And focusing our attention exactly where it should be.
And here we are. NBC News. This is how they are filtering the Epstein news for
you.
Found I should mention none of this obviously suggests any wrongdoing by the
former president, suggests that he was involved in a crime.
It's merely talking about his connections to Epstein, something that has
already, again, been out there.
But he has obviously maintained his innocence and denied any wrongdoing as it
relates to any abuse by people that Epstein exploited Tom.
That interaction that clinched. God, no, thank God.
And I, the slander has to stop.
And I thank God that NBC has the guts to come out and say,
Hey, just because the president was mentioned 50 times in the deposition of a
victim of a human trafficker,
just because he might have taken said human trafficker's plane 25 times or
whatever.
Just because the human trafficker's best friend, Ghislaine Maxwell, was at the
president's daughter's wedding.
There is no wrongdoing.
None of this suggests any wrongdoing by the president.
It's very important that NBC and all the other news networks that we know and
trust
come out and first and foremost defend the honor of the man who's mentioned 50
times in the human trafficking docs.
It's very important who will do it, if not NBC, who will do it?
Who will come out and, you know, defend, rightly defend this man who is being
maligned with such ugly talk?
Such ugly talk for no reason.
None of this suggests any wrongdoing by the president.
None of it.
Play it again.
Play the first couple of lines again.
None of this.
Found, I should mention, none of this obviously suggests any wrongdoing by the
former president.
Suggests that he was involved in a crime.
With the human trafficker, being on the plane of the human trafficker, having
the human trafficker's friend at the wedding.
None of it suggests any wrongdoing.
None of it suggests any wrongdoing.
It just happens.
It just happens.
Like Chris Matthews, who used to host Hardball until I didn't even know what
happened.
I don't know why they threw him out.
I don't think he even did anything.
I think he, I don't know what he did.
I think he made some inappropriate comment to a woman in an elevator.
Whatever.
Chris Matthews, his reaction to the Epstein thing was like, well, all of these
politicians, they're just, they're broke and they need rides around the country.
So some of them end up in these planes.
And rich guys offered to fly them around.
Yeah, this is a, yeah.
Chris Matthews came out and said like, hey guys, the Clintons can't afford to
charter their own plane.
Yet they, yet I can.
Somehow I can charter a private plane if I want to go perform at side splitters
in Tampa.
But the bill at Hillary Clinton somehow can't afford a chartered plane.
So they have to take the charity of Jeffrey Epstein.
Chris Matthews goes, to get around for their professional and political reasons.
They've become friends with the wrong frickin' people.
And these people are frightening and they want something.
They want the prestige of hanging around a politician.
So that was Chris Matthews.
Again, somebody who works at NBC.
That was his way of understanding it is that it's a big 90s movie mix-up where
you end up on a plane with a human trafficker at an island where they're having
sex orgies with children.
It's a big mix-up.
You weren't supposed to be there.
You just needed a ride.
It was planes, trains, and automobiles starring the ex-president of the United
States and a bunch of 15-year-olds.
That's what it was.
And anyone who thinks it's anything else, you're not.
You're crazy.
Because none of this suggests any wrongdoing.
Not one, not any of it.
None of it.
None of it.
This is the level of gaslighting.
And I hate that fucking word.
But it is.
But I will use it when it suits my purposes.
And I will say that this is a level of gaslighting.
It is almost impressive.
The news now has to tell you that your eyes and ears are, you're seeing the
words and they're on the paper.
But they have to then tell you that none of the words actually are any
indication of what the words are supposed to mean.
Like, for example, it would be like me handing you a menu and then walking over
to your table a few minutes later and going, none of this is food.
And you go, well, I don't understand.
You go, well, it's just words on a paper.
None of it suggests we have any of the food.
You go, wait, but it's a menu saying you've got a steak and mashed potatoes.
Yeah, but have you seen any of it?
Well, no, I haven't walked back into the kitchen.
Well, then it doesn't suggest that we have it.
That's what they're saying.
I mean, this is insane.
These are legal documents.
These are legal documents.
This isn't something people made up.
This isn't like something people came up with on X to be cute.
These are genuine legal documents released through the media.
You know what I mean?
They're not only being handed.
It's not like the Twitter files.
They're not being handed exclusively to a small group of journalists.
These are a wide ranging institutions are publishing these.
The veracity is not in question.
These are real documents.
And how many times, find out how many times Clinton's mentioned.
I believe it's 50.
Yeah, I think it's like 56.
Oh, I pulled up.
Yeah, I believe it's 50 to 60 times that the president of the United States,
the ex-president of the United States,
the ex-CIA director, Ehud Barak, the ex-prime minister of Israel,
all of these people were mentioned in the documents,
but the media is now coming out and going,
but by the way, none of them,
this doesn't suggest that they did anything wrong.
This just, you know, it's just something that happens.
They'll pin this whole thing on David Copperfield, by the way.
David Copperfield, he's going to jail.
You will see David Copperfield perp walked.
All of these billionaires they've mentioned, Dubin and Black,
Leon, the Apollo guy, and Glenn Dubin,
they'll all be fine.
The Clintons will be fine.
Somehow David Copperfield, this creep fucking magician,
that me and my dad, you know,
we watched him make a train disappear in the 90s on television.
It was kind of cool.
Do you remember that?
I don't.
You were young, but, you know, he did a thing.
He made a train disappear, and me and my father watched it.
Maybe you could find it.
And I like David Copperfield.
But apparently,
apparently,
yeah, he made this train vanish.
What year was this?
It looks like...
Are we going to get a YouTube strike for playing this?
That's a good point.
Or do you think Copperfield's people are distracted?
He's got no problem.
Maybe they're distracted right now.
Maybe Copperfield's media team's distracted,
and they're not going to be reporting people playing as a train trick.
I don't know.
But I will tell you this.
Apparently, David Copperfield was doing magic.
You know, you think when you go to a pedophile orgy,
that would be all you do.
But apparently,
Epstein went the extra mile.
He had, like, fun other things happening.
Can you imagine being a frustrated pedophile,
and you're sitting there and you're like,
all right, you know what I mean?
Like, I get it.
He's a big comedian.
But, you know, we're here to, you know,
I mean, that's why we took the plane, you know?
I mean, we're all being blackmailed and videotaped.
And, you know, can we just get to it?
Because, like, if I see this guy do another card trick,
I'm going to kill myself.
But apparently, that's what Epstein did.
You know, it's never enough just to be a pimp.
It's never enough to be anything, by the way.
This is what's interesting about life.
It's one of the great human comedies
where it's never enough.
So you have this guy who's, like, a pimp.
Jeffrey Epstein's a pedophile pimp.
And everyone coming to that island,
now, I know the media would disagree
with my crazy generalization, right?
Because, of course, there were people
that went to the island to see the fauna and the flora.
But let's just say that a good 90-some-odd percent of them
were there to fuck kids.
That's where they're going.
And Jeffrey Epstein is,
he's created this island pedophile paradise
for all of these people.
But it's not enough because he goes,
well, you know, he goes,
but I want them now.
I want them now.
I want this to be a weekend they'll never forget.
And he goes, well, no.
You know, probably even Ghislaine was probably like,
no, no, no, darling.
They're going to love it.
We got everything.
I got all these gals.
We're bringing them in.
He goes, no, no, no.
But what about a magic show?
And she's like,
I don't really know if we need.
I don't, darling.
I don't know if we have.
We've got all these children from bad homes
and they're going to fuck all these people
and, darling, they're going to love it.
And he's like, yeah, but I just want more.
I want people to talk about this.
I don't want this just to be, you know,
the same old pedophile orgies
that they've always been doing in Washington.
I want magic.
I want fun.
What about a tarot card?
What about a tarot card reader?
How about a tarot card reader?
What about a fun carnival, you know?
Some circus games.
It might fit the theme of being pedophiles.
How about that fun thing where, you know,
the water gun in the clown's mouth?
Ghislaine, can't we make it fun?
Shouldn't we have it a little more fun here?
You know, they don't want it.
And then there's probably all these pedophiles that are like,
and this guy Jeffrey was insufferable too.
He started talking about science
and seeding the human race with his DNA.
And can you imagine that?
You show up to the pedophile island
and then Stephen Hawking's there.
And Jeffrey Epstein's like,
so we're doing a talk about physics with Stephen Hawking.
And then David Copperfield is making a tree disappear.
And then we'll all fuck the kids.
People are going, hey, man, not for nothing,
but can we get a move on this?
It is hilarious because he was a pedophile pimp.
I mean, none of that's funny,
but just the idea that it wasn't enough.
He wanted to be known.
He wanted to hang out with like scientists
and he thought he was like a bon vivant.
And he was a pimp.
He was like, you know, the people that you noticed
or that you didn't, you know,
you would see in New York City when I was growing up,
like these guys with fur coats or leather coats
or, you know, big Cadillacs.
And then they'd have the hookers standing in Times Square.
That's all Jeffrey Epstein was.
All he was is a pimp.
But he had delusions of grandeur like anyone else.
Anyone else?
Because the Mossad and the CIA kept, you know, pushing him
and he was blackmailing all these people
and they were kind of like, you know,
they had his back up until when they didn't.
But he had all these delusions of grandeur.
It's like, you know,
he wanted to have all these scientists hang out at his house.
He wanted to hang out with Bill Gates.
And he wanted to pick their brains
and he really fancied himself as this guy
who was on the cutting edge.
But he was just a pimp.
That's the thing.
Magician David Copperfield had dinner with Jeffrey Epstein
and asked victim if she realized Predator's girls
were getting paid to find out other girls for him to abuse.
So what does this mean?
Was Copperfield saying this like,
hey, what's up here?
This incriminates Copperfield potentially.
Why?
Or maybe he's asking because he doesn't like this.
Maybe.
Maybe it's just, you know,
but did he leave the island after he asked this question?
Because, you know,
then he kind of knows something's going on either way.
The documents that go down here for a minute.
David Copperfield was at a dinner at Epstein's
and there was another girl present who looked young
and Joanna asked what school she went to
and Joanna did not recognize the school name
as being a col