Name: Bill Clinton and Gavin Newsom's Mysterious Mexican Adventure
Uploaded: 2024-01-18T23:00:24.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Clinton and Gavin Newsom's Mysterious Mexican Adventure' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Clinton and Gavin Newsom's Mysterious Mexican Adventure' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-18. Transcript available.

The ex-president of the United States, Bill Clinton, and Gavin Newsom went down
to Mexico to hang out.
They went to a cool resort.
I would love to be a mortar and pestle of guacamole sitting at the table
listening to this crime family give the last bit of wisdom.
This is all they have left.
The standard bearers of the Democratic Party, which is the Clintons, are
telling Gavin Newsom and his wife how to become the new power couple.
Because the Obamas can't, the Republican Party's in utter disarray, meaning
that there's infighting in the Democratic Party as well.
But both political parties are ****.
The Republican Party, you have the Wall Street types.
They want, like, Nikki Haley.
You want, you have, like, you know, the MAGA people for Trump.
You know, I don't know.
I don't know who wants Vivek, but I guess people that are, people on Reddit,
maybe.
But this is the Clintons telling the Newsoms, you know, and what a great dinner.
Because, you know, there's some, Bill's really just saying, listen, I let it
get away from me.
This is, he's, you know, there's a beach walk with him and Gavin.
There's a beach walk with him and Gavin, right?
Because they're kind of a similar guy.
Gavin's a **** boy.
You know what I mean?
He was married to that chick who's now dating Trump Jr.
Kimberly Guilfoyle Newsom.
Yeah.
So, Gavin's, like, kind of a pretty boy.
He, Bill, they speak the same language.
Hillary does not speak the language of Harvey Weinstein's testifier, testifying
about the penis woman.
Hillary doesn't speak her language.
Because she's, like, a real wife.
Hillary was never a real wife.
Hillary's a ****, you know.
Hillary is a problem.
And she wants her own thing.
And this ****, you know, when her and Hillary have to talk, Hillary's not
really excited by that.
She probably is.
But Bill definitely does a beach walk with Gavin where he goes, hey, it got
away from me.
And just, you know, just, you know, you've got to be careful out there.
Because, you know, it's not like it used to be.
This is a different world now.
Can you imagine just Bill Clinton, you know, at the end of it, being like, hey,
I mean, listen.
And you know, like, he definitely says to Gavin, like, he goes, they're trying
to say that I was, like, doing stuff on Epstein's Island.
And you know, Gavin's, like, looks at him strangely.
And Clinton's, like, can you believe that?
Like, they're trying to tie me into that.
And Gavin's, like, I, these, Clinton's, like, these QAnon types.
They're trying to tie me in to this Epstein stuff.
I mean, that's how perverted these people are.
It's how sick they are.
And Gavin's kind of, like, going, like, like, you know, Gavin's face is kind of,
like, yeah, no, it's, these people, man, they'll just, I mean, they don't care
about the truth at all.
Bill's like, right.
I mean, it's insane what they're doing.
And they're having a little beach walk.
And Bill's a really smart guy.
So Bill's not out there.
Like, people think that Bill's probably, like, and then I'll f*** this one and
that one.
And then we drown one of them.
Like, he's not, they're not doing that.
He's, like, setting it up.
So he's telling Gavin, like, they're lying about me.
They're going to lie about you.
This is what they do.
They lie.
And you have to get one step ahead of their lies.
That's where the fun comes in.
That's where the fun comes in.
Because Bill's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to get, you got to go one step
ahead of their lies.
Because they're going to, they're going to make up a bunch of s*** about you.
They made up a lot of stuff about me and Hillary.
They never stop.
Because the Clintons are boomers.
So they're the victims.
The Clintons are there only to complain to Gavin and his wife about how badly
they've been treated.
And Hillary's like, and they went at me.
They never stopped.
From the minute I raised my head, I became the symbol of everything that they
hated about women and about femininity.
And, you know, Gavin and the wife are sitting there and they're having some tequila
and drinking a Don Julio Blanco.
And they're like, yeah, yeah, no, it's, we saw it.
You guys were just, I mean, they, I mean, they never, I mean, sure, Bill's not
perfect.
But they never stopped.
And it's annoying.
It's annoying.
You know, they're just, the Newsoms are sitting there.
But they, but the Newsoms are sucking it all up because the Newsoms are like,
how do we, how do we convince the country that we're not going to, you know, s***
everybody over?
How do we, how do we do that?
How do we do that?
And Newsom's not Clinton, like Clinton's really good or he was really good.
But it's got, I would just love to be sitting there and listening.
It's 90% the Clintons complaining, 90%.
But then there's going to be 10% like, here's what you got to do to get the
things you want.
And that would be the interesting stuff.
Here's the people to talk to.
These are the guys that have to like you.
Here's the way it works.
You know, you need a bigger war chest than you used to.
You know, why do we really think Hillary lost?
Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.
But a lot of it is just complaining.
It's probably very boring.
What would be great is if the Clintons decided to kill them.
Like if they just killed them and then just, that was it.
Like if the Clintons just decided to poison Gavin Newsom and his, for what, I
don't know even why they would do.
I recorded a Patreon episode years ago.
It was called Bill and Hill's Last Kill.
About how there will be a time when they just have one more kill.
That's it.
There's like one more guy to get rid of.
But they, there's no reason to kill these people here.
But it would be fun.
There'd be something beautiful and Shakespearean about Newsom and the wife
going to get the secrets.
From the Clintons and the secrets going, and here's the biggest secret.
And then Gavin and his wife are dead in the guacamole.