Name: Elon Musk's Starlink Hooks Remote Amazonian Tribe on The Worst of the Internet #395
Uploaded: 2024-06-14T18:00:35.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Elon Musk's Starlink Hooks Remote Amazonian Tribe on The Worst of the Internet #395' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Elon Musk's Starlink Hooks Remote Amazonian Tribe on The Worst of the Internet #395' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-14. Transcript available.

Everybody now, by the way, is trying to take technology from the children,
but apparently there's some more evidence that technology itself
is having adverse effects on an Amazonian tribe.
They were given Starlink internet.
This is Elon Musk again.
F*** people up.
Elon Musk has become a god, by the way.
What's interesting about billionaires is they actually become real-life gods.
He can give you Starlink.
He can give you the internet.
He can give you speech on Twitter or X if you want it.
We are watching billionaires become actual gods in front of our eyes.
Like they have these uncontacted tribes in the Amazon,
and Elon Musk's Starlink has connected an isolated tribe to the outside world
and divided it from within because now a lot of them are addicted to porn and
social media
because this is inevitably what happens when you introduce something like this.
After only nine months with Starlink,
the Marubo are already grappling with the same challenges
and have racked American households for years.
Yeah, by the way, get them.
Get them involved.
I'm sick of their lives that are about, you know, necessity.
I'm sick of their old customs and their f***ing get them.
I want every uncontacted tribe hopelessly addicted to online porn.
If we got to go through it, they got to go through it.
Reach them.
Pierce the densest thicket of the jungle to deliver these people porn and
social media.
After only nine months with Starlink,
the Marubo are already grappling with the same challenges
that have racked American households for years.
Teenagers glued to phones, group chats full of gossip,
addictive social networks, online strangers, violent video games,
scams, misinformation, and minors watching pornography.
And this is, can you show some photos of the tribe?
Because this is, yeah, this is the real deal.
This is real deal tribe.
They're in the Amazon, and now they're on TikTok.
Overnight, they're living in a hut, and the wife's trying to go to sleep,
and the husband is on the phone.
Look at this guy.
This is amazing.
This is an uncontacted Amazon tribe that has lived forever,
probably maybe warring with some other tribes.
Maybe not.
I don't know.
I don't want to cast aspersions on anybody's.
Maybe it's lovely and peaceful.
But they're living in nature, in harmony.
They're doing what they're doing.
They have customs.
They, you know, there's, and then the whole thing is upended in the matter of
nine months.
The tribe is, it's out of good, because now they know there's more.
Guess what?
Now they know there's more.
And that's why they're f***ed.
You can't know in life.
This idea that you should always know how good someone's doing.
You shouldn't know how good someone else is doing all the time.
It's bad.
We go back to the beginning, where we're talking about Caitlin Clark.
We're talking about whoever.
In your face, every minute, how good someone's doing,
and how important that people feel that they are.
It's bad for the person.
It's bad for other people.
So this tribe that was probably pretty f***ing happy a year ago
is sitting around, and they're watching the real estate shows,
and going, it might be nice to have a toilet.
It might be nice to have a toilet.
Or go see Taylor Swift at an arena.
That might be nice to watch the white woman sing the white devil woman.
That's what they probably call her, but they say we like to walk.
Why can't we see the white devil woman?
Can you imagine the wives being like, they want to see Taylor Swift?
They now know who she is.
She can't be on the internet for any length of time and not know who she is.
So, by the way, our culture is at the lowest point it's ever been.
It is across the board.
Not all things.
There are good things.
I'm not trying to be needlessly negative here.
But our culture across the board is the most banal it has ever been,
for the most part.
And it is also insane.
It's interestingly both at the same time.
It's completely insane and also somehow boring.
It's like boring and then also crazy.
But it makes the least sense it ever has.
Nothing really makes any sense.
We are introducing this Amazon uncontacted tribe to the internet at the worst
possible time.
Literally, there are people, children are identifying as animals on the
internet.
Not all of them.
But there are people that are claiming that they feel more represented by, I
don't know, birds or something.
There are people on the internet wearing diapers.
There are adults wearing diapers and demanding to go to spas where they can be
treated like babies.
And this is when we are introducing them to culture at this exact moment.
This exact moment is when they're going to get their first taste of American
culture.
They're watching TikTok.
They're just seeing crackheads and Waffle House brawls and people in Down
syndrome doing drag.
This is their first taste of American culture.
All they've done is try to spearfish in the river and now they're watching
people with Down syndrome do drag shows.
And they don't get it.
It's hard for people like me to get, and I've been around a while.
I mean, I was kind of raised on this.
Not drag Down syndrome.
You know what I mean.
The internet.
I've been around.
I get it.
These people overnight have been thrust into a world that is completely upside
down, insane.
They don't know what's happening.
Can you imagine being a tribe in the Amazon and trying to just navigate what
the f*** is going on?
Everyone is so connected that sometimes they don't even talk to their own
family.
Alfred Marubo, the leader of the Marubo Association of Villages, has emerged as
the tribe's most vocal critic of the internet.
The Marubo passed down their culture and history orally, and he worries that
knowledge will be lost.
He's most unsettled by the pornography.
He said young men were sharing explicit videos and group chats.
Yep, welcome.
A stunning development for a culture that frowns on kissing in public.
We're worried young people are going to want to try it, he said, of the graphic
sex depicting in the videos.
No, I mean, these guys now are seeing women get choked out, get their heads
smashed through glass tables.
They're seeing bags over women's heads.
The Marubo.
The Marubo are watching our porn at its most violent and its craziest.
They're watching people f***ing on each other.
They're probably, what's that?
We had this creepy comedian from one guy who used to watch that cake farts
website where women would just fart in cakes.
This is what they're watching.
They are watching all of this now.
This is not like fun, early 2000s porn, like, oh, the pizza man's here.
This is like people are, there are genres of porn there where women are just
stepping on bugs with high heels.
You know, can you imagine leading this tribe and seeing, like, immediately
seeing all of this and going, how do we, we can, we can't handle this.
We can't handle it.
He said some leaders have told them they already observed more aggressive
sexual behavior from young men.
Oh, yeah.
Where's the Marubo, Andrew Tate?
He's coming.
He's coming.
There's going to be a guy chewing leaves in the forest being like, these b***hs
got to start making that porridge.
These b***hs are trying to go to school now.
Where's that paste they used to make?
Where's that yucca paste?
Yeah.
Look at those two right there.
Go up those two.
They're going to be doing, like, some type of house hunters vlog.
It's very destabilizing to people.
The idea that immediately they're being confronted with all of the things they
didn't really know existed or they had heard rumors of.
They had heard rumors from people that went to a faraway place.
Look at the Starlink.
The girls holding up the Starlink.
They have no idea what's about to hit them.
They have no idea what's about to hit them.
They don't need to know.
I mean, are people better off with this?
If they've lived the way they've lived for so long, are they better off?
At least in America, if you watch some of these things, right?
It's, you know, maybe you could say to yourself, listen, maybe one day I can
start an OnlyFans and I can shit on a glass table and a guy under it can
pleasure himself, jerk off, and I can make a couple of bucks.
Maybe I can make a couple of bucks on glass tables where men under it masturbate.
Maybe I can make it.
If you're an American, you could look at that and go, maybe I can do that.
Maybe I can get involved.
Maybe there's something in it for me.
Maybe there's some meat on the bone for me.
But if you're one of the Marubo and your job is like, you know, fisherman or
hunter for the tribe, do you need to, you know, watch season two of Buying
Beverly Hills?
You know, it's just, it's just, it seems like it's unnecessary.
Young people have gotten lazy because of the internet.
They're learning the ways of the white people.
That's right, baby.
You're going to learn the ways of the whites.
The young people are like, fuck you.
I don't want to make the pottery today.
I don't want to make it today.
I don't want to make it today because I just sold a picture of my feet.
You people are backwards.
You're making fucking pots.
Who cares?
We'll go buy pots.
I'm selling pictures of my feet on the internet.
I've got a future.
And listen, let me be honest with you.
This whole indigenous uncontacted tribe porn thing could go big.
I'm dead serious.
These people doing porn could go big.
Big.
This could be huge.
And again, I think porn has a lot of negatives.
But I'm just saying from a business marketing standpoint, if these people would
just start to embrace this, if it's here anyway, and we can't get rid of it,
this would be a big, there'd be a lot of people into this porn.
You know, there'd be a lot of people, especially it's a mixed race, get some
whites in there, you get the colonizer, the colonized, the whole indigenous
thing.
Everything's a fetish.
Put it up on FetLife.
Put it up on FetLife.
This could be big.
Embrace it.
They need to stop.
I realize now that it's probably very disruptive in the negative thing that
they're experiencing.
But I also think if they play their car, they're not that great looking, but it
doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
It's really just about, are they willing to really put it out there?
You know?
The internet has divided opinion in the Marubo tribe because some people are
holding on to the old ways.
But the new ways are better, guys.
The new ways are better.
I mean, this is the fight, right?
This is a whole fight that every civilization is going to have.
They're just having it in one year.
That's pretty extreme.
But you can't fight progress.
It is going to be, there's such an interesting experiment to watch next year.
Like, what's going to happen?
The leader dies.
Someone claims he was murdered.
They start all these Reddit threads about it.
They become deeply suspect of each other.
They do like a January 6th.
But they kill the people, you know, because maybe they're really about it.
I don't know.
I feel for them.
I don't know what to say about it.
But if it's here and it's staying, you got to get with it.
There's a lot of stuff.
By the way, it's a great reality show, number one.
It's huge.
It's great.
The Marubo.
You're on Netflix.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like, we're into it.
We're seeing it.
We're seeing it.
We just need to send a producer down there.
Hi.
How are you?
Hi.
My name is Jessica.
We're so excited to show your uniquely, you know, your culture and how special
you are.
And put cameras down there.
Live stream.
Can we contact them?
They have the internet.
Can we contact them?
Can we get them on this show?
Is there a way we can get them on this show?
You would have to find them, yeah.
Well, they're found.
They're in an article.
If you can get them, I'll interview them on my show.
If you can get one of their, this Marubo tribe, because I get it.
These people, we're letting them into the party at peak insanity.