Name: Epstein, Wexner, & The Great Silverware Heist | The Tim Dillon Show #484
Uploaded: 2026-02-22T00:30:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Epstein, Wexner, & The Great Silverware Heist | The Tim Dillon Show #484' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-22. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Epstein, Wexner, & The Great Silverware Heist | The Tim Dillon Show #484' from The Tim Dillon Show on Comedy Buff. Published 2026-02-22. Transcript available.

Epstein, Wexner, & The Great Silverware Heist | The Tim Dillon Show #484

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon Show.
I apologize that I am late.
The episode is late.
I went to a show last night in L.A.
I went to the Snow Strippers concert.
I don't know anything about the Snow Strippers.
A friend of mine is a manager in the rap world,
the underground rap world, like young people.
And he was like, the Snow Strippers are a thing.
Have you heard of the Snow Strippers?
So you have.
Okay.
And it was, people were messaging me.
You're at a Snow Strippers?
Okay.
First of all, yeah.
Yeah, I am.
So what?
But I didn't know who they were.
And a lot of their fans seemed to be very lovely people.
They were kind of furries and kind of goth, Mexican furries, trans.
And great.
Love it.
Go to the concert.
Stop with the shooting.
But yeah, I mean, like, you know, that's the thing.
Trans furries just go to the concert.
You know what I mean?
Like, the shooting, if that's what happened, and that's a whole nother thing.
But we're getting, we're getting sidelined.
We're getting sidelined.
Because frankly, let's be honest, a lot of us don't, including me.
I don't think it was that.
But whatever.
Whatever.
Moving on.
But a lot of their fans, and I had trans furries coming up to me, which was
nice, saying thank you for your work.
Literally.
And there was a few trans furries that took photos with me and said, thank you
for what you do.
And I think the trans furry kind of Mexican goth community, in small parts, in
small numbers, it wasn't a million people, but in small numbers, I think, are
starting to warm to me.
You will come to me eventually, no matter what segment you're in.
You will find the program eventually, no matter what segment you're in.
I will start to make sense as you go through life.
It doesn't matter that you have the fox head on or whatever that woman who came
over to me last night had.
Could have been a cat.
Doesn't matter.
Again, we're off track.
I will start making sense to you at a certain point in your life.
You can't fight it.
I know many people want to fight it.
And they fought it for decades.
I bump into people and they make faces and they're fighting it.
And they're like, that guy?
But eventually, I will wear you down with logic and charisma.
There's nothing you can do.
There's nothing you can do.
And I realized that last night with the lovely Snowstrippers fans.
I thought Fake Mink was going to be there.
And I didn't know who that was until four days ago.
And I started listening to Fake Mink.
Do you know who Fake Mink is?
See, I got you.
Well, he's from the UK.
And I thought Fake Mink was going to be there.
But Fake Mink wasn't there.
And then one of the other people was like, yeah, Fake Mink's not on this.
But every now and then I'll go to an underground rap show in L.A.
Or not even underground, but like, I don't know, a weird thing.
And people are shocked.
Like, you'll see people look at me and do a double take.
It's like crazy to see me in that environment.
Because I'm dressed kind of like the way I'm dressed.
But I dress insane anyway.
So I kind of dress like I might be there.
Because, like, these young people see me.
And I think the word is unk.
That's the parlance.
And they see me like, what is that?
Now, some of them don't know who I am.
A lot of them, most of them.
But then occasionally you will see someone there.
And then there's people there that are, like, older than me
who are clearly just trying to kidnap people.
That's an interesting segment.
I'm there because I was invited by some guy who's a manager
that I'm friends with now.
But I then look at people that are, like, older than me,
like, straight-up dad energy, but creepy dad,
who are in a button-up shirt and glasses like a serial killer.
And then it's just a bunch of Mexican transferees.
And I'm like, well, he's trying to scoop one of them up
and bring him to the court.
There's no...
But I guess that's the way it is.
That's the way it is.
There was a few people, and I was kidding around
with my manager friend,
who's a new friend, but I like him.
Because he's, you know, he's like, oh, he's a fun...
I like, if you get a good white-black guy, it's gray.
Like, that archetype of guy.
But the white...
By the way, I've been having a lot of issues
with the white-black guy recently
only because it's so over the top.
I was in Vegas.
I was having lunch at True Food Kitchen.
This white guy approaches the table,
and you know what it's going to be immediately.
You know it's a white-black guy,
but not in a way that you can...
Like, he's like, what up, plurr?
Like, he's made player...
Maybe it's southern white-black guy
that's really bothering me.
But whatever he was doing,
it was so over the top,
and he was very happy.
And he was like, what up, plurr?
What up, plurr?
And I was like, oh, God, this is...
We're doing this.
It was one of those things where he's like...
Like, you would order the lunch,
and then he'd be like, bro, I couldn't forget this order.
I finna get you ketchup.
But it's fully a white...
Fully white guy.
Finna get you ketchup.
What up, plurr?
It was just too much.
It was awkward, and it was too much.
But if it's tastefully done,
and this guy, tastefully done, white-black guy,
I think it's an attractive quality
if it's tastefully done.
If the white-black guy is done in a tasteful way
where it's not so over the top and silly,
where it's like insane.
True Food Kitchen, by the way,
worst restaurant in America,
disgusting, tasteless crap, sue me.
Oh, it's so good for you.
It's not, and it's terrible.
Have you been there?
It's a restaurant dedicated to, like,
and everything's in an air fryer.
But it's not good.
And they pretend...
It's like American restaurants
should just not even attempt to be healthy.
They don't even know how to do it.
They should just try to kill you.
If you're going to be healthy,
buy the food, cook it.
If you go out to eat in this country,
you should go out knowing
that the restaurants are actively trying to kill you.
And any restaurant that goes,
we're actually only trying to wound you,
they're also trying to kill you.
They're trying to...
So there's True Food Kitchen
that hired this sweet guy
probably two months out of prison,
rehab, whatever.
And it was just a white black guy energy
I couldn't get with
because it was so over the top.
I'm finna get you ketchup
and I ain't trying to get you charged
for this ketchup.
I ain't trying to get you charged
for this ketchup, plurr.
And I was like,
listen, can we just...
Yo, I heard you from New York.
I got people there.
And I was like...
He's like,
I'll be around there sometimes.
That's what he said.
He goes,
yo, you from New York?
I'll be around there sometimes.
I go,
hey man,
I just...
I just...
I mean...
I just want the baked chicken finger here.
I...
But this white black guy
that I'm now friends with
is...
It's classy.
It's done well.
I think it's important
that it's just done well.
Now, if it starts to go overboard,
I'll have to, like...
I'll have to, like...
I'll have to detach.
But I'm very excited
because right now
this white black guy
who I didn't think I would like
because my...
Another mutual friend
brought him to my studio.
I was like,
this guy's cool.
And I'm like,
ugh.
Because I...
Most people,
I really...
I really, truly...
This is what happens at 41.
Most people,
it's tedious
to even talk to them
or be near them
or around them.
And I don't want to sound
like I'm an antisocial hermit.
I'm not.
I force myself
to suffer through this.
The people in my life,
agents, managers,
business managers,
assistants,
personal friends,
family,
it gets harder and harder.
The yoke that binds you together,
it just isn't
as much of a connective tissue
as you get older.
People in your life,
some of them,
and now maybe you don't have this experience
and bless you.
I know I was accused the other day
of being so negative on this show.
Love and light
to everyone who doesn't
have this experience.
God bless you.
Love it, love it.
But as you get older,
it is harder
to tolerate people,
especially new people.
At least with old people,
you go,
I know what I hate about you.
And you know what you hate about me
and we overlook that
and we get to the things
that we like about each other
or there's certain friends you have
that you just like talking to
about certain things.
I have friends
where I just talk to them
about certain real estate markets
in certain cities
and it's been a decade-long friendship
where I will just talk
to certain people
about what's going on.
Certain people will call me,
C. Austin's getting fucked.
I go,
I know.
And it's 25 minutes on the phone
once a month,
once every two months.
And that's okay.
And so I don't like
meeting a lot of new people.
Like when you're young,
you're like,
I really want to meet
a lot of people.
I love meeting interesting people.
By the way,
that's a crazy,
anyone who says
that's a crazy person,
anyone who says
they like meeting
interesting people is ill,
mentally ill,
is a mentally ill person.
I'm telling you
because it doesn't happen
that frequently
that anyone can even like it.
It's someone who
is imagining
what it would be like
if it happened.
I meet interesting people
all the time.
It's terrible.
It's actually terrible.
I meet interesting people
all the time.
It's,
it's actually
not that interesting.
It's,
I've met people
where it's so insane,
it gets boring.
Like,
they're so interesting,
you will meet people
in the world
that are so interesting,
it's actually
not that interesting.
It's,
it's actually a weird,
like,
it's like,
goes full circle.
So now my game is,
I'd like to meet people
that are moderately interesting
or not that interesting
and pull out of them
something that is interesting.
Oh,
your mother faked
her own death
and disappeared for a year
and then came back.
That I like.
I don't want to meet people
who are like,
I built a company
from the ground up.
Like,
already I'm sick
when I hear that.
Already at a dinner,
when I hear I built this
from the ground up,
I'm physically ill
and I,
I want to kill myself.
I built this
from the ground up
and in the beginning
nobody really believed,
oh my God,
oh my God,
come with a gun,
shoot me in the face now.
And like,
my boys believed in me
but like,
not even they did
and like,
it took a while
and the first seed round,
oh my God,
get a noose,
tie it around my neck,
make sure it's strong enough
and lift me to the rafters
and let me go see God
because I can't,
but I,
I like this new person,
this new white black guy,
it's done well,
it has class,
there's charisma,
it's not over the top,
it's not like that waiter
and it reminds me of an archetype
from my childhood.
We had a lot of white black guys
in Long Island
that were,
that,
that,
that some went overboard,
some are dead,
you know,
they got too into it.
But,
you know,
I mean,
some,
you play the role
to get too into it
and you start being stupid,
you know,
but this one is,
and he's got a white black guy name
and it's a cool ass name.
I'm not going to say it,
but I,
the white black guy's got to have
a cool ass name
and that's,
that's all I'll say,
but I can't do any more at lunch.
What up,
purr?
I'll get the,
I'm finna get that ketchup.
I can't do it.
It's awkward,
it's disrespectful
to the contribution
that black people have made
in our country.
It really is.
It's like wrong on every level.
I don't know why it's not called out.
Whatever.
I'm moving on from it,
but whatever.
I don't know why that's okay.
It's like crazy.
If I decided to be a Dominican woman
for a year,
people would say
that's like not good,
right?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm just saying,
but good,
good job on the snow strippers.
It's,
she's a Russian woman.
She's attractive.
Not really to me.
Biologically,
I don't care,
but she's an attractive lady
and she's up there
singing for the transfer
goth Mexicans
and a few serial killers
who want to,
scoop them up,
put them in the trunk
and myself
and the white black guy
who's not my best friend.
And then you,
in the beginning of it,
they couldn't get the,
I don't