Name: Norm Macdonald Live w/ Guest Gilbert Gottfried (Pt 2) (S01E12)
Uploaded: 2013-06-17T00:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Live w/ Guest Gilbert Gottfried (Pt 2) (S01E12)' from Norm Macdonald Live on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-06-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Norm Macdonald Live w/ Guest Gilbert Gottfried (Pt 2) (S01E12)' from Norm Macdonald Live on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-06-17. Transcript available.

Norm Macdonald Live w/ Guest Gilbert Gottfried (Pt 2) (S01E12)

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That's HuluPlus.com forward slash Norm.
Last week on Norm McDonald Live.
I've been having a little bit of crisis about my entire career.
What's going on with you, Mia?
I went to San Francisco where there's important comedy.
And I'm telling you, I've changed my whole world view.
What's great is jokes about wilt it now.
You're just saying words.
I'm telling you that it's important, you know?
A lot of people are funny.
Look at fucking Gilbert Gottfried.
He's going to be on the show later.
Hilarious.
Yeah, but he's not important.
He's the least important fucking shit fuck.
Because unless you're murdered for what you believe in, what's the point?
I have to kill myself.
God damn it all.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm so confused.
There's no way this would light.
You need more gasoline.
No!
And now, the exciting conclusion.
I need gasoline.
Lights lay on fire.
Okie okie.
Do I have a line?
It's not lighting at all.
You don't need to add Liz Gilbert.
Yes!
It doesn't work?
No.
What?
Put my hood up?
It's not lighting.
I just heard from Daniel there's trouble with the Kathy Griffin booking.
Reason to live.
We've got to get this straightened out.
Have those words ever been said in any talk show?
We're having trouble with the Kathy Griffin booking.
Okay, I can't take this off because then my hairy belly will show.
Okay, guys, seriously.
You guys continue this bit.
What bit?
I'm just going to change for a second.
Adam Egan, interview Gilbert.
Gilbert, I was wondering about some of the comics that you started out with.
What are you up to now?
I was talking to Jeff Ross a couple nights ago and he said that you might be,
you guys
are working on a potential reality show?
Maybe.
That would be endlessly watchable.
Yeah.
What's behind that?
What's the deal with that?
It's some show.
It's just some show.
What was your favorite part of your career so far?
Not this show.
Not this show.
Yeah.
Not this show.
When I was a kid, I watched Ford Fairlane like maybe about 12 times in a row.
That was my first taste of Gilbert.
And I don't know.
I think you've just gotten, you've aged like a fine wine.
Comedy.
Strictly comedy only.
But I'm no Tom Snyder.
Or Woody Woodbury.
Who's Woody Woodbury?
You'll have to look it up.
Well, fill me in.
No.
All right.
He was big.
Woody Woodbury was big.
Yeah.
How big?
Like, what did he do?
Not big at all.
Was he just, was he a local guy?
He, he was, he was in, I, I remember him being in a movie with Ellen, uh, Ellen
Burstyn.
Okay.
I know Ellen Burstyn.
When she wasn't known.
Oh, so this is a long, long time ago.
When she was like really young.
Okay.
This is a long time ago.
Some bad comedy with Ellen Burstyn.
Jesus.
Now.
And Jesus.
And Jesus was there.
Jesus was in it.
So this was a real long time ago.
Uh, can you, can you, um, tell me about the roast and how, uh, specifically
when, when
you got into your, uh, the aristocrat pit and what, because apparently it was
something
about, and it was like right after 9-11, right?
Uh, yeah, it was, it was about a week after September 11th.
This was September 11th, 1968, so I don't know what the big deal was, but, uh,
no, it
was, uh, uh, after September 11th and it was in New York to make it worse.
Right.
And, uh, and it's like there was that weird feeling all over the city.
And then, uh, I went up and I said, well, I have to, I can't stay late tonight.
I have to catch a flight to L.A.
I couldn't get a direct flight.
We have to make a stop at the Empire State Building.
Oh, you're back.
Oh, I'm good.
Now, now I'm a little confused now.
Where'd you get the sandwich?
What?
Are you going to set yourself on fire again?
Oh, come on, man.
We don't have to dwell on that.
No, no, no.
Because few people know this.
But before the show started, uh, Norm comes in to where, like, this office that
I'm sitting
trying to have something to eat, and he goes into this long, convoluted thing,
like, oh,
well, you know, at the end, I'm going to, like, say, I'm going to show Janine
Garofalo and
say, I'm serious, and I'm going to pour gasoline on myself, and you'll say, don't
do that.
That was funnier than the entire, and I'll set fire, and it goes on.
He describes it.
It's like, like a mini-series.
Yeah, it's like someone talking to you in a fever dream.
Yeah, it just goes on and on and on and on.
And then finally, I had to ask someone else here.
I said, what did he just say?
Because I didn't -- it made no sense whatsoever.
And then, much like how we were talking in the show about -- sometimes as a kid,
I'd watch
a comedian or a sketch and think, oh, I don't know, but obviously something's
there.
I thought, once I see it on television, it's going to be great.
I'm just missing it.
I'm stupid, and don't get subtle comedy.
And I thought, but once it's on its feet, and then it was -- that really was a
nightmare.
It was a -- yeah, it was a real nightmare.
It was a real nightmare.
It was horrible.
I had to put my sandwich aside.
It makes no more sense when you actually -- it makes less sense when you saw it.
It wasn't.
It didn't work out.
Yeah.
It didn't work out.
I was begging you to abort.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're looking.
We're writing, trying to look for pieces for our best of.
I think that one.
I think that's what we're doing.
Of course, you know, much like the stateroom scene and night at the opera and
Charlie Chaplin playing
with the globe, as far as classic comedy moments, it's going to be you setting
yourself on fire.
Have you ever worked with the Capitol steps?
What?
I'm just asking a question.
It's not a fucking quiz show.
It's not a quiz show.
It's a chat show.
The Capitol steps.
Yeah.
They were -- they zoomed for Mark Russell.
Oh.
With the --
Do you know Mark Russell?
Oh, yes.
Yeah.
The piano --
Doing the Washington ring.
Yeah.
That was the kind of thing you'd watch and go, that's -- see, now, I -- even
then,
I was going --
You go, do I get it or --
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was going, I guess I'm not intellectual enough to be --
Is it bad or do I not get it?
Yes.
Art Buchwald, I found like that, when I'd read the old newspaper.
Oh, yes.
You go, maybe I don't get it.
Art Buchwald, who wrote "Coming to America."
Oh, that's right.
I mean, the big lawsuit.
And -- and --
What was his name again?
The piano?
Martin Russell.
Huh?
Yeah.
Yeah.
With -- who did the Washington ring.
Yeah.
All the political songs.
Martin Russell.
Yes, yes.
We were just talking about that.
Yeah, yeah.
He forgot it.
Yeah.
He would have these songs.
They'd play them on Channel 13 a lot.
Yeah.
It's always on Channel 13.
I don't know.
And we're lowering our taxes today.
And I go, okay, I guess -- see, I don't keep up on politics.
So if you were Mark Russell, and you're talking about, like, the government
getting into Verizon and watching, you know, Verizon.
The government is watching Verizon.
Yes.
Norm MacDonald is doing serious comedy, so he's setting himself on fire in a
beat at the end of his show, where they do a cliffhanger, like in the Batman
series.
Bad Man is very hard to find.
What?
Yeah.
Well, he hides in a cave.
No, no.
I mean, it's --
And he's Bruce Wayne during the day.
It's very complex, yeah.
But did you think it was weird that he had a youthful ward, and then it was
played by Burt Ward.
Ah.
But they always, you know, in the --
See, see the CIA's involved in this one.
Yeah.
So how would Mark Russell talk about that?
He had a ward whose name was Ward!
When I think of youthful --
Well, I was gone.
Did you ask him who he started out with?
Yeah.
And what was the answer?
He kind of skipped -- he didn't --
He skipped over it.
Yeah, he avoided that.
Flip Wilson?
Flip Wilson.
Flip Wilson, he seemed to have gotten out at the right time.
Like, you know, he didn't hang around too much, right?
I think he got rich almost like Arsenio.
Yes.
Rich, gone.
He's coming back, Arsenio.
Flip, oh.
No, no, Arsenio.
Flip's dead.
I think he's dead, yeah.
Yeah.
But do you know that Arsenio's coming back?
Ah, yes.
Yeah.
Do you think it's gonna work out?
No.
You were on Arsenio's show many times.
I used to come on that show a lot, yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Wait a minute.
Did you ever do --
This is working almost as well as setting himself --
Did you ever do the Johnny Carson show?
Ah, he -- I'm doing Alan Thicke.
Oh, you couldn't because you were on the Alan Thicke show.
No.
No, I never did Carson.
Oh, I wonder why.
You know, Gilbert.
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Is that it?
No, it's going to happen.
Wait a minute.
Why did you never do the Carson show?
They never asked me.
And is that depressing?
Yes, very depressing.
And I always thought Carson, he did that -- he had his character named Aunt Blabby.
Oh, sure.
That was a direct rip-off of Jonathan Winters' Maunt Fricky.
He even stole the costume.
Oh, yes, the exact same costume.
How did he get away with it?
Because he was the king of the night?
I think it was king --
But he would do -- yes, he would -- Jonathan Winters had Monty Frickert, this
old lady.
And he would dress up in the --
I recall that.
And then Aunt Blabby came out, and he's right.
Same shit.
Like a direct steal.
And then he would steal, like, Carson.
Oh, Karnak.
Yeah.
Also stolen from Question Man.
Oh, yeah.
And also just -- even the voice was then, like, Jackie Gleason, with, like, the
--
Ooh!
Reginald Van Gleason.
Yes.
That's good booze.
Yeah.
That's correct.
He could steal off everyone, and then everyone was afraid of him.
I respect that.
Huh?
I respect that.
What's that?
And --
I read "King of the Night."
Oh, yeah?
Oh, my God.
He was -- they said he did cocaine with John DeLorean.
Ooh!
You know, his best friend was John DeLorean, which was a little suspicious.
Yeah.
And then when you think about it, they said he did coke right before the monologue.
But when you think about how he did that monologue --
Oh, yeah.
You know, he's, like, moving around and, like, ultra-confident.
Yeah.
Seems like maybe a guy on coke.
When you started out, were guys doing cocaine?
No, I don't -- I didn't notice anything in particular.
Oh.
But I do -- I -- and then he also stole that bit where he'd go, "I'm doing
serious comedy."
And I'm -- I'm going to -- I'm going to -- I'm going to set myself on fire.
Uh, uh, Ed, Ed, you want to -- you want to light a -- a big light around me?
People are not going to know it.
Hey-oh!
Oh, do you know, on this blue cards -- this is where we do our -- this is where
we do our --
this is where we do our famous quotes.
'Cause, you know, Jeanine Ruffalo, uh, she does serious comedy.
And then -- then there's that comedian who gets shot on stage.
He -- he does --
You know what Johnny Carson said that was interesting?
He said that comedians -- a disease, he called it.
Yeah.
When they become philosophers.
He was -- he was referring to -- to George Carlin.
But we do famous quotes on these shows.
Yes.
Okay.
Would you like to read?
When did this start?
Huh?
When did this start?
There had to be a first time, you know?
Oh, it's been going on for some --
So this --
This is like those infomercials where they make it like a talk show.
That looks like a -- that looks like an infomercial.
And -- and -- and they'll have the one who's the host going --
You know, in the years --
Didn't they have Danny Bonaduce?
Oh, yes, yes.
Yeah.
They make it look like a talk show.
And then on the infomercial, I'll say, you know, in the years that this show's
been on --
And -- and you go, wait a minute.
Yeah, yeah.
Then how come I've never seen it before?
But this is seriously a famous quote.
Oh, okay.
All right.
You know our new segment?
Famous quotes.
This is gonna go over real well.
Spiro Agnew.
Spiro Agnew.
I can do one -- I remember one --
Spiro Agnew.
Spiro Agnew.
Ye