Name: AYG Comedy Podcast: Garage Fridge Contest (2020)
Uploaded: 2020-09-10T01:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Garage Fridge Contest (2020)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-09-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Garage Fridge Contest (2020)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-09-10. Transcript available.

AYG Comedy Podcast: Garage Fridge Contest (2020)

Hey, gang, it's your old pals, Uncle Hank and Kippy.
Just want to thank you for tuning in to Are You Garbage?
Yeah, guys, make sure you subscribe.
That way you get the episode as they come out.
And you can also go to gasdigitalnetwork.com.
Use promo code AYG to get bonus content
and get the episodes before they come out and HD streaming.
Do it.
Yeah.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians
are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Oh, my word.
Hey, everybody out there.
And welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast.
This is Are You Garbage?
The show where we sit down with your favorite comedians
and find out if they grew up classy or if they're a big old piece of shit.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day here,
the fall has begun here in New York City.
The summer is over.
The perfect time to do the garage fridge contest.
We're here in the big studio, feeling good, feeling fresh.
My co-host coming at you right next to me.
He's got a MacBook Pro Air in front of him,
which might still need a couple payments.
This thing was paid in cash by my wife, okay?
Shout out to the weakling at NYU who couldn't carry his book bag.
Because I'm a fucking gentleman.
How about that, you know?
Gang, the next time we reach you for a best pal, do yourself a favor.
Make it a kippy.
This kid tastes great.
He's less filling.
And he's going to be on the cover of Rogaine Magazine this week.
Articles entitled, Hanging in there.
Guys, you can catch him this weekend, this month in hair follicle quarterly.
He's on Forbes 30 under 3 inches.
Give it up for Kevin Ryan, everybody.
Hey, what's up, gang?
Just thanks for tuning in.
We appreciate it so much.
We do.
We have another host episode for you where we're going to go over to garage fridges.
The big contest, baby.
The big giveaway.
Of you dirt balls.
And by the way, some of you need to fucking call a cleaning service because you
stink, okay?
I'm coming out and saying it.
I'm going to start sending out fucking DeVry pamphlets.
Fucking pick it up a little bit.
Get a second job.
Do something.
Let's go.
We need high income demographic here, folks.
We ain't going to make it selling the low level shit.
We got to start moving fucking BMWs.
Fucking Johnny Walker Red.
I don't know.
Yeah, guys.
Thanks so much for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes.
Get us back in that top two hundo.
Tell a fucking friend.
Grab your wife's phone, your boyfriend's phone, your partner's phone, Latinx,
whatever you need.
Whatever you got cooking.
Nothing wrong with any of it.
Just leave a review.
We appreciate it.
And also, full video available on YouTube.
You can subscribe there as well.
Those numbers are through the fucking roof.
Over 5,000 subscribers on YouTube.
We appreciate that.
You guys are the fucking best.
Oh, yeah.
And also, two quick shout outs to you guys.
You're doing shout outs now?
Nah, it's for the show.
This guy's taking cash.
Now, it's for the show.
So, there's a very rabid fan base.
These guys started a Reddit.
Are you familiar with Reddit?
I'm familiar with it.
You can check out the RU garbage.
I've read it before.
All right.
Dylan, cut that.
Why is it only on him, by the way?
I was just going to say that.
How come I got to look at Kippy's face when I'm doing the intro?
Yeah.
Is this jumping back and forth?
Yeah.
What's going on here?
Hey.
There he is.
Was that the shot the whole time?
No.
I was switching it around.
All right.
I don't know.
This kid's relaxed.
There's something suspect back there.
I'm going to have to get Bobby Hutch in here.
We've been holding a really good relationship with Dylan, despite the criticism
that comes
from outside sources.
Yeah, guys.
You've got to put the moneymaker up there, kid.
The face is selling the pod.
Not cue ball over here, I'll tell you that.
All right.
Shut up.
I'm doing fucking business, okay?
You're worried about the only thing you've got is your hairline.
All right, Tubsy?
Why don't we get...
Let's get a shot under the table for him.
I look like I'm laying down.
Look at...
See, that's the problem.
You can...
The back love handles are really getting out of control.
Yeah, that's what...
That's your problem.
The back love handles.
I'm that fact.
I'm always leaning.
Yeah, it's called gravity, Tubsy.
Guys, if you're a Redditor or whatever they're called, you can check out and
subscribe to
the subreddit.
It's RU Garbage.
And then also shout out to Stephen McQuillen on the Facebook group.
There's a whole Facebook group that I didn't know about.
Guys, we love you, man.
Thank you.
Everybody's posting pics, sharing stuff, laughing.
It's a fucking family.
I love it.
Thank you so much, everybody.
We fucking appreciate it.
I'll have to get in there on one of my burner accounts.
Just a fat lady named Trish?
Somebody made female versions of me and took our headshots.
I thought you did that.
No.
The Facebook group did that.
And they made female versions of me and Foley.
And dude, you look like a Trish.
The last one of me with my old headshot.
That's really good.
Pretty cute.
Dude.
Take a fucking run at her.
Dude, if it was 2007 and Kippy had about 13 Bud Lights in on it.
Really?
A couple of fireball shooters.
Good night.
I'd be fucking...
I'd be sending you some pina coladas at the end of the bar.
On a gift card that I'm running the tab on.
Hey, bartender.
Do me a favor.
Just send down a tray of mozzarella sticks for that cutie down at the end of
the bar.
Just sending food.
Yeah, put that margarina in a trough for it.
Nobody does that.
Everybody says drinks.
You want to get a girl in the rack?
You send a thing of pot stickers?
You want to get me in the sack?
You send down the fucking sampler.
You know what I'm talking about?
Oh, dude.
You send me...
Listen, the gentleman's move, if you're out with a couple of buddies, by far is
getting
the fucking sampler.
Because you always have the weirdo that wants, you know, like, oh, let me get
the deviled
eggs or something.
It's like, dude, you get two of them and stay off my fucking motz dicks.
I'll tell you that.
I'll tell you what.
The Denny's sampler is second to none.
I don't know what they coat them fingers with, but you crack a tooth on them,
they're crispy.
Yeah.
I don't fuck with Denny's.
Speaking of great appetizers, real quick, because you were talking about a
version of
this, but my cousin Jordan got married this weekend.
Congratulations to him and his beautiful wife.
Fantastic, beautiful wedding.
Is that why you're giving him a shout out instead of a present?
You fucking piece of garbage.
Listen, I'm a little tight on funds.
Hey, this puts us even, by the way.
I'm still waiting on that gas digital check to drop.
How about a shout out on this Tuesday show?
No, but they had-
Cut that, Bill.
Cheese steak dumplings.
Let me tell you something.
But that's how trashy Philly is.
They just cheese steak everything.
Oh, so good.
Anything from the Far East, they empty out and put some fucking steakums in.
Cheese steak egg rolls, cheese steak potstickers.
Cheese steak COVID.
Yeah, it's not that bad.
A little ketchup.
Yeah, man.
I'm big.
Dude, put meat and cheese in anything and sign me the fuck up, daddy-o.
Yeah, it's good stuff.
Hey, speaking of meat and cheese, real quick, want to give another special
shout out.
Oh, I don't like this.
There's too many shout outs.
Let's start over.
Take it from the top.
Well, we got our friend Steve Torrelli.
We're selling out.
Who you know.
Shout out to the good folks at GM Motors, everybody.
All our friends at Halliburton, everybody.
Well, in spring.
Steve Torrelli, who does amazing gifts and all that stuff for a lot of podcasts
on Twitter
and Instagram, at Torrelli Picks.
You guys should follow him.
Made up these mug for us for the McFoley.
Yeah.
Look at that right there.
Fucking beautiful.
We're going to always have them on the desk here.
Drink our beverage out of.
I'm not.
I'll stay out of my Poland spring bottle.
Thank you very much.
That I paid for, by the way.
All right.
Waiting on that Venmo.
Yeah.
Let's get into it.
Foley went out to dinner for his girlfriend's.
Yeah, we need to do another pre-sale quick.
Because I'm broke.
Foley went out to a fancy dinner for his girlfriend.
And while he's at dinner, he's fucking texting me asking for the hundo that I
owe him.
He's going, yo, can you Venmo?
He goes, this dude's got the balls to go to Nobu.
Which it's like fucking two hundred, two bills a plate at Nobu.
He's got the balls to go to Nobu.
In shorts.
And he's out.
And he texts me, hey, are we all squared up?
What's up with that hundo?
And I'm like, yeah, I'll send it to you.
He's like, yeah, can you send it now?
I'm like, what's going on?
And he's like, I'm at Nobu.
I'm like, somebody got a little too big for his fucking waistband.
Somebody ordered two appetizers.
I told her to keep it to one and we'd split it.
She's out there fucking throwing money around like I'm fucking Roosevelt.
Dumping glass in there.
By the way, can we make it a little hotter in here?
I'm fucking schvitzing.
We're talking about cash.
I'm fucking sweating.
Yeah.
Wait till the IRS starts poking around.
Oh, God.
I'll be long going by then.
Which that brings it up, the segue.
So what we're going to do is we're going to get to the garage fridge.
Guys, the submissions from the garage fridges have been fucking awesome.
Some of you are, yo, hands down, clean fucking living.
Some of you got a little bit of cash.
You put the Ryan's to shame over here.
Doing well.
Some of you are doing very well.
Some of you need to fucking move back home.
Some of you need to throw away some food.
Yeah, dude.
Some of you.
The one guy, he just sent a picture and it's just trash.
He has actual garbage.
And he goes, yeah, I use it as my trash can.
It's his proper fridge.
But I do that as well because that's a better way to go.
It's the better way to go because you're going to take it out the next day.
Why keep it in the trash where it's all stinky?
Then take it out that night.
That's garbage.
I'm not taking the trash out that night and going to the alley where the rats
are at night.
What are you, nuts?
I only do that during the day and I throw it from right.
Never.
You shot put in a hefty bag.
You fat piece of shit.
How's that supposed to make me feel?
I'm trying over here.
I got new shirts, by the way.
I'm done with the George collection.
I'm sure the weight's going to start falling off now.
Guys, he's got new t-shirts.
Everything's all right.
I'm a DXL man now.
All the way.
Guys, we appreciate everybody fucking sending in the video.
Some of you went as far to upload it to YouTube.
They put a little music behind it.
Good narration.
Some of you fucking home runs.
We really appreciate it.
Production quality.
And also, in the first half of the question,
we're going to just dick around.
The first half of the ep,
we're going to dick around, you know,
do a little Kippy Foley.
I think we're doing it now.
We got some listener questions,
and this is one of the first listener's questions.
Really?
That we were talking about weddings.
And this is, I know,
well, we have,
this will be a sticking point.
We've had this conversation before,
but it is real trash.
Coke at the wedding?
No, this is from Aaron.
Is it Garbagio to get a hotel room at a hotel close by the designated wedding?
Wait, hold on.
Is it Garbagio?
No, I'm at the Red Roof Inn down the street.
Yeah, good luck getting a fucking bridesmaid back there,
you fucking dirtball.
Yeah, the last stop on the shuttle,
and then you got to take your fucking taxi.
Wait, hold on.
Let me get through the question.
All right, it's just a quick Uber ride.
45 minutes down the road.
This is a home run of a question.
Is it a Garbagio to get a hotel room at a hotel close by the designated wedding
hotel
to save a couple of bucks?
Dude, help.
That is trash, dude.
Yeah, that's trash.