Name: AYG Comedy Podcast: Ryan Long - Canadian Garbage
Uploaded: 2020-09-21T01:00:02.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Ryan Long - Canadian Garbage' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-09-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Ryan Long - Canadian Garbage' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-09-21. Transcript available.

AYG Comedy Podcast: Ryan Long - Canadian Garbage

gang quick reminder thursday september 24th at 7 p.m we're going to be doing a
live show
are you garbage at the punchline of philadelphia pennsylvania come and check us
out yeah guys it's
going to be a good show we're going to do a live stand-up and a live podcast
with special guest
mike rainy from dad me podcast so check it out get your tickets now yes sir hey
gang it's your
old pals uncle hank and kippy just want to thank you for tuning in to are you
garbage yeah guys
make sure you subscribe that way you get the episode as they come out and you
can also go to
gas digital network.com use promo code ayg to get bonus content and get the
episodes before they
come out and hd streaming do it yeah welcome to another exciting edition of are
you garbage the
show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or
absolute trash now here
are your hosts kevin ryan and h foley
oh baby hey everybody out there welcome back to everybody's favorite new
podcast this is are you
garbage the show where we sit down with your favorite comedians and find out if
they go classy
or if they're absolute trash i'm your host h foley coming at you on a beautiful
day here at gas digital
studios the heart of the east village new york city alive and well back in the
new york groove feeling
good the fall's fucking coming in get the fucking pumpkin pie ready because
uncle hank is hungry my
co-host coming at you from right next to me he's the brains behind the
operation ladies and gentlemen
you know him you love him do yourself a favor gang the next time you're
reaching for a best pal
you go ahead and make it a kippy he's on sale right now half price give it up
for kevin james ryan
everybody 40 more forehead and get it while it lasts everybody happy to be now
in cans happy to be
here thanks so much for listening everybody couple of quick announcements get
the business out of the
way live show philadelphia live podcast and stand-up show that's the philadelphia
punchline
thursday september 24th at 7 p.m get tickets now they will sell out get them at
the punchlines
uh website tickets will sell it's gonna be outside socially distance all the
good business they're
doing it real well down there yep um also make sure you rate review subscribe
on itunes also full video
available on youtube you can subscribe there as well get it do it done it love
it and that show's
gonna have a little stand-up mixed in with a live podcast with philadelphia's
own mike rainey so like
kippy said make sure you get your tickets and let's have a fucking great time
but that's neither here
nor there ladies and gentlemen because we could not be more excited to have our
incredible special guest
here with us today this kid's hot he's a fucking get we got him he's in studio
we are excited he is
incredibly successful stand-up comedian director filmmaker and producer all
right check this out he is the
creator the star and showrunner of the digital series torontopia and that guy
and the tv series
ryan long is challenged he has two stand-up specials out seen him on mtv nbc
netflix he was nominated for
director of the year at the notable awards his youtube channel you ready oh
check out these numbers
one hundred and seventy seven thousand subscribers wow his videos on social
media and youtube have
millions upon millions of views ladies and gentlemen he's a tall drink of water
he's a fucking good
looking kid yeah he looks like the bass player from the strokes i'll tell you
that right now right this
guy's calvin klein chic all day he's cool the big question anybody's mind today
is he garbage that i don't
know but he's fucking cool as shit i'll tell you that it looks like the guy
that used to babysit or
used to date my babysitter ladies and gentlemen give it up for mr ryan long
everybody yeah thank you
thank you what an intro buddy look at you coming at you from the other side of
the table actually i just
realized that uh as we're talking about if i'm garbage that i just took my gum
what the fuck rested it on my phone that's that's next level trash yeah as you
were like is this guy
garbage i was putting my gum on my phone it's like it's like putting it behind
his ear to save it i'm
telling people you're ready to walk into the can film festival meanwhile you're
sticking your gum
under the table what the fuck it's a real cool guy move wow it is pretty sweet
you ever see people
put it behind their ear that was only that was only willy waka i used to have
the spacers so i got the
hole so i rest one in one piece uh one little uh piece in each of the hole
buddy thank you so much
for doing the show man yeah we made it work i know we we almost did it a couple
we almost did it a
couple of times it was like we would like we'd schedule and i'd be like hey can
you do four to be
like god it's the only time i can't do this week it was like yeah to be fair
though he was like can
you do four like tonight yeah it was i asked him i asked him if he's moving and
shaking what are you
talking about i asked him at 3 45. yeah uh tell us a story about how you grew
up you're a canadian guy i am
yeah straight from the suburbs of uh canada ajax ontario okay so yeah i grew up
in uh i was like
your standard causing trouble skateboarding kid i love it i tried to do both of
those very
unsuccessfully but yeah what was the name one of them unsuccessful what was the
name of the first band
um we had a band called element 113 and then i had a band called the johnstones
and that kind of was
like my whole thing for a while we're gonna so i went to university in guelph
uh i got kicked out
of uh residence in the first month so that should add to the story okay what
did you get kicked out
for uh so i they gave me all these warnings right so basically basically i got
kicked out in the first
month so i got for uh i threw a party on the roof then we broke our window and
then it's a rock star
canadian van wilder over here broke into the one time we broke into the library
in the middle of the night
and then like threw a party there and slept there on the floor and they came
back in holy right that's
fucking cool as shit dude i'm very cool and then i so what happened was this is
when i was like in
the band and stuff and then they basically banned me from all the other residences
except for mine
and then they banned me from mine too so i got kicked out of that lived in my
car for about six
months so i feel like i'm i'm i'm trying to paint the picture yeah it wasn't a
rolls royce was it no i
had a caprice classic big body bends i like it yeah it was pretty fun until it
got cold so i lived in
this caprice classic and then uh for about probably a good four months it was
pretty dude that i don't
know if you know what did your parents know this no i didn't tell them you guys
so you were still
able to go to school yeah i cashed in all my stuff and then lived in the car
went to a different
university like a lot hung out there on the weekends with my other friends and
then i was touring a lot
with the band too and then but the car had no windshield wipers so in the
winter i used to put a
like around like a little half hockey stick how canadian i'm gonna tape a rag
around it and you have
to do it with your arm holy shit dude a car is a dead giveaway what like the
things you do in your car
yeah it's like an old cop car yeah yeah yeah man yeah but played in the band
forever that was kind of
like it was kind of like my job we had a successful band in canada okay because
of that i got some tvs
doing like kind of jackass style stuff okay the show that was like the ryan
longest challenge which
was like the allergies show kind of that sort of stuff gotcha uh started doing
stand-up 10 years ago
and uh we've been doing that for the last 10 years and doing tv and making that
stuff and
doing videos and then i moved to america about a year ago hell of a time to
move here buddy yeah isn't
that crazy i moved to america to do stand-up comedy i got into like most of the
clubs and then in four it was
i was here for four months uh-huh you know this is how crappy it was so i didn't
even get a place yet
because i didn't know where i was gonna be most and stuff like that so wait
this is recent that you
moved that you moved down here yeah i moved down here like last september oh my
god not crazy i was
here for four i was here for enough but so i left i have all my stuff in a
storage locker in canada right
now and my car is there i have a car all my stuff and then i go okay when i get
a place once i got a
place i was gonna get a van and drive everything here and then uh covet
happened so i just i just was like all
right i guess i'm gonna buy new stuff but i don't have much stuff that's funny
you're like leaving
canada like i'm going off to fulfill my dreams i'll see you losers later second
you cross the border
quarantine play kids yeah outside yeah outside of my house there's like riots
every day yeah things are
going great ma things are going great down here in the big apple like america's
wild everyone's like
it's not always like this i'm like sure yeah okay i can't even go back i haven't
gone back because when
i left i was like i'm sure i'll be back all the time and i haven't gone back
once i haven't seen
anyone i don't know if i don't know if canada will let you in at this point
right no it's you can go
back but they want you to quarantine for two no one's checking that no they are
are they well there's
two parts of it one that means i have to go back for more than two weeks
because if you go to the
airport they'll give you the ticket there and they've given out like over five
thousand tickets
apparently okay they'll call your house there's like an app they put in your
phone it actually is kind
of a whole thing jesus an app sounds like some commie to me it is it is this is
america i'll go
wherever the i want i'll drive down to florida no mask keep it real dude i did
a
stand up at some weird convention this weekend and they had name tags and
everyone had a different
dot on their name tag based on whether they want to do handshakes or not oh
dude what we're living
in a wacky world alert yeah with the nerdiest ever one guy wants a high five
only i'm only
hugging guys yeah i had a black dot for i only want elaborate handshakes it's
got to be something
special uh what about growing up how many brothers and sisters what your mom
and dad do what was the
situation there i got two younger brothers and um so my parents got got
divorced when i was like in
grade nine or something like that so then it was a free for all yeah who'd you
live with your mom or
your dad uh mostly my mom but like they lived kind of close so it was like a
nice two christmases yes i
got them playing off each other oh dude this piece of did the same thing dude
if you weren't doing
that you weren't even trying my dad would come pick me up on like a two like
they lived like a few
minutes from each other so they split time during the week so like a few days a
week i'd be at my
dad's few days a week i'd be at my mom's and my dad would always pick us up at
my mom's and i would
get in the car and i would just i would get in the car like all pissed off like
oh and he'd be like
what's wrong i'm like mom said i couldn't get a bb gun he's like yeah okay dude
just like right to
k-mart to get a red rider or whatever ar-15 yeah dude that's the best i love it
when people are like
i know i'm just kind of messed up because my parents got divorced you're like
half of the people in the
world yeah yeah exactly yeah yeah and uh before that when they were together
traditional single
family home so it's single family like well like everybody always asks that
yeah you live there by
yourself just your was it like an apartment a condo or like a sit like a single
i lived in like a
normal sub canada kind of have suburbs differently like the way that america
has suburbs from my
experience maybe i'm wrong it feels like suburbs is sort of like the more rich
area right yea