Name: AYG Comedy Podcast: Ria from Barstool - Italian Girl
Uploaded: 2021-07-18T23:19:06.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Ria from Barstool - Italian Girl' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'AYG Comedy Podcast: Ria from Barstool - Italian Girl' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-18. Transcript available.

AYG Comedy Podcast: Ria from Barstool - Italian Girl

Hang on a second there, gang, before we get the show started.
The Keep It Moving 2021 Tour is in full swing, as you know.
Yeah.
We have some additions.
Sure.
We have some announcements.
Kippy, straighten them out.
Guys, we're coming to Providence, Rhode Island, August 11th.
We're going to be in Boston, Massachusetts, August 12th.
Shalinkit.
We're going to be in New Brunswick, New Jersey, August 25th.
Jersey.
Stress Factory.
We're going to be in Timonium, Maryland, outside Baltimore at Magoobies on
August 26th.
Then, the big thing, Moontower Comedy Festival.
Look out.
We're going to be there.
At the fest.
At the fest.
A couple of festy boys.
There you go.
That's going to be at the end of September on September 23rd, 24th, 25th.
Also, another big announcement.
We're going to be at Skank Fest in Houston.
That's going to be November 5th, 6th, 7th.
Plus, we're going to be adding more dates.
It's going to be boncos.
Get some tickies.
It's going to be a good time.
Can't wait to see you there.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals
or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there.
And welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast.
This is Are You Garbage.
It's a little show.
We sit down with your favorite comedians and we find out if they grow up to be
classy or if they're just a big old piece of trash.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day.
We're down here at Antony's basement.
I don't even want to get into it with you about what she's up to.
Yeah.
So, we'll save it for off the air.
But we have to have a little discussion.
I can't wait.
My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
He is the brains behind the operation.
He's really an international businessman.
He's kind of the head bozo around here.
So, do me a favor.
Make me look good.
Show him a little respect.
Give it up for Kevin, James, Ryan, everybody.
Hey, gang.
Thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
And as you know, those numbers are...
True to the roof.
True to the roof.
They're fucking cooking.
And then Patreon.com is...
I mean, that's where the real fucking magic's happening.
That's cooking with gas over there.
Oh, yeah.
It's making a couple of shekels.
A couple of bucks in our pockets.
So, check that out.
You get bonus episodes, bonus content, live streams, the whole fucking nine
yards, a bunch of videos.
Check it out.
Very nice.
And that would be a nice shout-out to our producer, Extraordinaire.
He's the magic man.
He makes this all look good.
Give it up for T-Bone McMuffin, Toby McMullen.
What's up, dudes?
What's up, T-Bone?
Nothing.
Me and Hank been carpooling.
This dude is a psycho.
Only guy I know who stops at green lights.
For our protection, okay?
Friday night when you're leaving the city after doing spots, these maniacs are
fucking driving around out there.
So, I make sure no one's going to come through and fucking crush us.
Not going out now.
Things are good.
I'm in the passenger seat with a pillow on my lap, so I'll smash my head on the
dash.
Yeah, it's a tough ride.
Gang, we could not be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean
incredibly, special guest here with us today for the first time.
She's one of the stars over there at Barstool Sports.
Pretty big deal.
Everybody loves her.
We love her.
She is the co-host of Because We Got High and, of course, Chicks in the Office.
But the big question in everybody's mind today, is she garbage?
Now, we know there's a Long Island pedigree in there.
I can tell by the gold chains.
Man, I don't have mine.
You came in like...
You came in like Funkmaster Flex.
Jesus Christ.
Fucking Carmella Soprano over here.
Gang, I don't have my numbers in front of me, but all signs point to trash.
Telling you right there.
Give me a nice, big round of applause for Maria Chivo.
Yeah.
You nailed it.
Nailed it.
You got it.
What's up, guys?
Fucking killed it.
Thanks for coming.
Thank you for having me.
I mean, you guys are great hosts, by the way.
Thank you.
What a fucking intro.
I feel pumped to be here.
The whole time.
I don't know if you saw me, but right before I said T-Bone, I was mouthing that.
I don't know why this one got me so nervous.
Yeah, the last name.
Last name.
The last name.
Because you don't usually rock that.
You're like Madonna at this point.
Just Rhea.
Just Rhea.
Rhea.
Which is pretty cool.
I mean, it's just not a good last name at all.
True.
That was a tough one.
It's just not...
There's nothing to it.
It's not like you hear...
Sorry, pulling that single name, Rhea, that's pretty cool.
That's like a pop star thing.
I wish I could just get the Instagram to just be Rhea, but it's like my full
name.
Yeah, yeah.
It's very confusing.
Who has...
Is there a Rhea?
I think there is.
Yeah, there's gotta be.
There's gotta be.
An artist or just some bozo?
No, I think some sort of artist.
Yeah, if you could get a three-character Instagram handle, that's like...
Power.
Dude, just three?
Just R-I-A?
That would really elevate me.
Like, I think the Maria Chiffo is what's stopping me, but...
Kid's a pop icon.
Let's put a story around.
All right, she's young, she's cool.
Yeah.
Look at the chains.
Give us the full backstory.
And as we said before, we talked a little bit at Friday Night Pints, but we
really didn't
get into it.
Give us the whole deal.
Long Island, the whole nine.
Yes.
Long Island, born and raised.
You want to know where I was born in Long Island?
A hundred percent we do.
Winthrop Hospital.
Ooh, she gave us the hospital.
Sounds fancy, though.
Because I'll be honest, I don't know what town that's in.
So I just wanted to give the hospital name.
Who the fuck knows what hospital?
I don't know.
I just wanted to throw that out there, just in case.
Because, you know, people know, like, they know that the hospital Justin Bieber
was born
at.
So maybe if I have a super fan out there, I'll be like, oh, Ria was born at Winthrop
Hospital.
Wow.
Give that to them.
That's pretty good.
I've lived on Long Island my whole life, basically.
Where in Long Island?
Uh, Seaford, Nassau County.
Nassau.
Because there's two counties, right?
Or there's the good-
Suffolk and Nassau.
Well, it's the trashy one.
See, I would say Suffolk, but then somebody from Suffolk would say Nassau.
Which one's the Hamptons in?
I think Suffolk.
Yeah.
Yeah, so Nassau's the trashy one.
Yeah, exactly.
I didn't want to answer that one.
I also am not good at geography, so you're asking me questions.
Which one?
Geography?
Jesus Christ, it's an island.
It's the county you grew up in.
Well, yeah.
Born and raised there, went to Catholic school my whole life, so is that nice,
or-
It depends.
It can go either way, I think.
It can go either way.
But it is technically a private school.
All girls Catholic school?
No.
Boys and girls?
Boys and girls.
Okay.
All right.
Parents together.
I have an older brother and older sister, and it's really just as, like,
Italian as it
gets.
Yeah.
There's nothing else to the mix besides-
Just straight, Long Island, Italian, Guidos.
Long Island, Italian.
See, here's the thing, though.
I wouldn't describe my family as Guidos, but if you met them-
Sure, of course.
You would probably describe them as Guidos.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're dripping in gold.
I know.
You literally have three gold necklaces on.
I actually-
I got my first car last week, which is a Mercedes.
What?
And I sent everyone a picture of it, and they were like, you're just in the mob.
Like, you're a mob wife.
Is it pink?
No, it's black.
It's all black.
Black on the outside, black on the inside.
Yeah.
You just picked up a Benz?
I just picked up a Benz.
He does all right.
Damn!
Yeah.
Look at him.
Is there anyone in your family named Anthony that you refer to as Antony?
Yeah.
Is there any ants in your family?
There's a ton of Anthony's, but I'll tell you this.
This will shock you.
We do not call them Tony.
Really?
It stayed as Anthony.
It stays as Anthony.
Yeah.
Respectable.
A lot of Michaels, Franks, Anthony's, and then it kind of, you know, goes crazy.
Maria's very old school.
Yeah, it's old school.
It's Maria, yeah.
My mom's name is Rosaria, so.
Holy shit.
Get the meatballs going.
Oh, wait.
And her dad?
Her dad's name is Jayakino.
Holy shit.
Yeah.
God damn.
Yeah.
That's like real Guinea shit.
That's real New York Guinea shit.
Jayakino.
That guy knows how to grow San Marzano peppers, I'll tell you that, tomatoes.
Damn.
Does it right.
Holy shit.
Your mom and dad aren't from Italy, though, right?
No, they're not.
Are they born and raised Long Island?
Well, my mom.
It's like a Billy Joel song.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
My dad, born and raised Long Island, Elmont.
My mom lived in Queens or Brooklyn.
Okay.
And then Valley Stream, which is just, if you're from Long Island, these are
very Italian areas.
Like, you know what we're talking about.
The Stream is marinara sauce, just so everybody knows.
Yeah.
It's a good red sauce.
Get it right from the Stream.
What did your parents do growing up?
My dad was in the union, insulation.
Nice.
Shout out to the insulators union.
Yeah, the insulators union.
That's good air quotes.
Local 12.
He had a no-show job.
Shout out to Local 12.
I like it.
She doesn't know the neighborhood she grew up in, but she knows the local
number.
That's who pays the fucking bills.
You know the local number.
My dad's going to be like, why are you giving out our social security on the
podcast?
Now I got to whack these two.
I kind of like the fat one, but I got to do what I got to do.
My mom was an ortho tech.
Nice.
Okay.
I like that.
Blue collar.
Love it.
And you didn't go to college, right?
So I went to college kind of, not really.
Like, I did a semester.
Kind of, not really.
I did a semester at Pace University in the city for film.
Dropped out of there.
Then I was a pharmacy tech.
Okay.
And then I went to FIT.
Okay.
And then I started working at Barstool and FIT at the same time, and then I
dropped out of FIT.
Of course.
It's a smart move at that point.
Yes.
There was no reason for me to stay there any longer.
Right.
What did you want to do at FIT?
Well, okay.
So now I'm going to dive.
I'm really going to dive into my life now.
Yeah.
What do you want?
Let's go.
I was like a child model actress starting from when I was eight years old.
Okay.
So in and out of the city four times a week, my dad would drive me.
He'd literally drive into the city at 4 a.m.
Then he would get home at around, he's like fucking in and out.
He'd get home like any time between 10 and 12 every day.
Get home, pick me out of school, drive me to the city for auditions, acting
class, whatever
it is.
I did that from when I was eight years old up until like the middle of high
school.
You were in and out of class like they would take.
Oh, the people in school.
First of all, my parents were like, don't tell anybody like kids are like
really mean.
They're going to be really mean to you if they know.
So for a really long time, I didn't tell any of my friends at school.
I thought you were like dying or something.
They thought I was so sick.
Yeah, of course.
Even the teachers thought I was really sick.
And one day they were like, they talked to my parents like, what's going on
with her?
And that's when the doors opened.
My parents put in, I remember this, you know, like one of those envelopes, the
yellow, yellow
folders.
Yeah, the manila folder.
They like put in all like, like catalogs that I did and like my comp cards, my
headshots.
And they were like, just bring this in and give it to one of your teachers.
Slide it across like you're doing a deal.
I remember going into class one day and was like, my dad told me to give this
to you.
And then from that point on, the teachers knew and then none of the kids knew.
And then one of a kid at school, parents saw me on the side of a bus.
I actually have the picture on my phone.
Nice.
S