Name: High School Dealer - Are You Garbage Live: Stand Up Comedy (2022)
Uploaded: 2022-06-18T17:50:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'High School Dealer - Are You Garbage Live: Stand Up Comedy (2022)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'High School Dealer - Are You Garbage Live: Stand Up Comedy (2022)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-06-18. Transcript available.

Is it okay to be 28 and still buy weed from a high school kid?
Best part about it, if he ain't got money, what the fuck's he doing?
That weed pussy.
Fucking call your principal, dude.
Man, the Sems and Steeds in that bag must have been helped.
It's about to graduate.
Something I assume you did not do.
Here's something that's great to see.
You can't really see it, but this gentleman right here, after his beers,
instead of giving them back to the waiter,
He's been crushing them.
Has crushed them and put them in the water.
Are you the mayor of this town, sir?
He's like, that's 35 cents, motherfucker.
Goddamn deposits.
Clap it up for Conrad and the dirtbags at Table 9, please.
Love you too, buddy.
Where's Brendan F?
What are you, the teacher?
You better remember your nurse's name, too, goddammit.
Brendan, where you at?
Hey, buddy.
Don't let us down, man, okay?
Tell me you're a pediatrician or something like that.
I can't fucking breathe hard.
He's not an actual doctor.
Relax.
He's looking for free health care right here.
That's all.
He's looking for that school nurse.
Hey, where's she at now?
Who are you here with, Brendan?
What's up, buddy?
Who are you here with?
My two friends.
Your two friends.
What kind of work do you do, brother?
I'm an IT guy.
Very nice.
What did you get when you're SATs?
I took an ACT.
I got like a 21.
That's fantastic.
Give him a round of applause.
I like that.
This keeps on the fucking streak.
That's not that good.
That's not good.
It's out of like 38 or something.
36.
I don't know what they are,
and I just wanted to sound smart.
That guy's yelling, it's average.
The zombie's like, it's average.
That's a median score for the half-dead people.
Scotty Pippen's favorite salad dressing, rigs!
What kind of bed do you have, brother?
You got a king, a queen?
A queen.
A queen.
Is it against the wall or in the middle of the room?
Against the wall.
And what do your buddies do for a living?
What's that buddy?
Retail.
Where at?
Smoke shop.
Smoke shop.
That doesn't mean that.
Takes out retail.
You're a drug dealer.
Target, Macy's, Bed Bath & Beyond, that's retail.
Chicago!
That's like having a Twitter and saying you work for Elon Musk.
Part-time right now.
Part-time.
It's nights and weekends, but I'm trying to go full-time.
I would have rather you say freelance.
I would have...
It makes sense.
Brandon's question is,
is it garbage if your friends paid you for tonight's comedy show ticket with
weed?
I would have to say freelance.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.
I would have to go full-time.