Name: Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Yannis Pappas!
Uploaded: 2022-08-07T22:59:49.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Yannis Pappas!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-08-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Yannis Pappas!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-08-07. Transcript available.

Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Yannis Pappas!

Hachi machi, that middle-class famous tour is in full swing, Gipperino.
You ain't lying, fatty.
It's a live comedy show. We play a little AYG with the crowd.
Great way to introduce people to the show.
Bring the squad. Come out and see us. We're coming, baby.
Yeah, gang, these tickets are selling quickly, so make sure you get your
tickets.
We're coming in. We're going to be Red Bank, New Jersey.
Then we're going to Seattle, Portland, all in August.
Then in September, we're going to Kansas City, Springfield, St. Louis.
Then we're going down to Nashville, hitting Indy.
Coming home to Philly, baby. The chicken's got to come home to roost.
Then we're hitting Providence, Rhode Island, and up there to Beantown.
Get those tickies.
Let's go.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals
or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast.
This is Are You Garbage?
Oh, yeah.
A little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find out if they're
going to be classy or if they're just a big old piece of trash.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day.
We're down here at Aunt Toadie's basement.
She's away.
Okay.
She's at Eagle's camp.
Okay.
Talking shit.
Uh-huh.
Hoping that one of them takes a swing at her.
She got a couple of dollars coming her way.
My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
He is the CEO of Are You Garbage?
He's an international businessman.
He's the Prince of Park Avenue, but always the king of the boardwalk, baby.
Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan.
Hey, gang.
Thanks for tuning in.
As always, make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
As you know, those numbers are...
Trudor out.
...cooking.
And then, obviously, the greatest goddamn website of all time, www.patreon.com
slash RU Garbage.
Check it the fuck out.
It's a party over there.
And get tickets to a live show.
Shows are selling out.
Philly sold out.
Seattle sold out.
Boston's about to go get them tickies.
Come see us, gang.
Have a nice quick shout-out to our producer, Extraordinaire.
The Magic Man makes us all look good.
He works the ones and twos.
He crosses the Ds, and he dots the I's.
Give it up for T-Bone McMuffin.
Toby McMullen, everybody.
What up, dudes?
What up, T-Bone?
Oh, man.
Long days in the building.
Yeah.
Yanni's been here in here about 10 minutes.
I'm ready to buy a bunker, dude.
This kid's in one today, baby.
When are you guys going to admit that Antutti doesn't live here?
Shut up!
I was upstairs.
Yanni!
I came down.
You guys are running some sort of tax scam here.
This guy's fake news.
You guys don't want to pay the property taxes on this place.
Antutti left the family, and she's fucking a guy named Derek.
She lives on the other side of the tracks.
And these guys have built the studio here, so they don't got to pay fucking
taxes.
Come on up.
Yanni.
Listen, we're still getting her-
It's in Tootie's name, but she's not here.
I know the fucking scam.
It's a straw purchase on the house.
Yeah, I know how you sound.
Yeah, we got her social security checks coming in.
What do you want from us?
She died 18 years ago, you idiot.
What the fuck?
Gang, we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean fucking
incredibly special guest,
back with us again today.
Family at this point.
You know him as the host of Long Days.
He's got a special out right now that's tearing up the fucking charts called
Mom Love.
Do yourself a favor.
Go over to YouTube and check it out.
Give it up for the one, the only, Giannis Papas.
What's up, how you guys doing?
Thanks for coming, buddy.
Thanks for having me.
Thanks for, you know, thanks for having me.
I drove all the way out here to sell chairs.
Also, I don't like to disrespect to Mr. Louis C.K.
You called us the Wild Watch.
The fucking Louis.
You did?
What the fuck?
I did, I did.
Two seconds.
I saw you did the Wild Watch win.
I almost went up to fucking New Rochelle or wherever the fuck you are.
Tune you up.
I thought that was, I thought that's a good nickname.
That's great.
That's a fantastic nickname.
Although when I'd said it on the last episode, Foley was like, he tried,
Oh, you did.
You were like, Wawa Brothers.
You didn't like the twins or the Wawa guys.
The Wawa guys.
You didn't want to be related to him.
I am getting fatter by just being in his proximity.
We're fraternal.
We all kind of are like in between sizes, right?
It's tough.
Sure.
You float a lot.
What are you rocking?
What are you, a large XL?
I'm in between a large and an extra large.
Really?
Which is embarrassing.
Do you have to do some t-shirts in the morning?
You get up.
They're fresh out of the, out of the laundry.
You got to do this.
You doing that?
You doing a little shake?
Before you put the head in, you do a little pop.
I put them on first.
And I, if it's a large, I try to stretch it and see if it works.
Look in the mirror from the profile and then I take it off.
Okay.
If you look at the bed and there's just a lot of larges just thrown on the bed
until
I find one that fits.
I'm in between, I'm at the point where I have to like crack open a 10 pack of t-shirts
and try each one on.
Love that.
To make sure, I either look like I'm wearing a leotard or I look like I'm a
black guy going
to a barbecue.
It's like a fucking two.
Black, small, Yanni.
Just too big or too small.
You never know what day they were made at the factory, you know what I mean?
It could have been made on a Wednesday.
Get you all jammed up.
Especially if you're shopping at TJ Maxx, everything's all fucked up in size.
Who's doing that for you up there?
Did you, everybody knows, beautiful family, suburban life, well taken care of
out there.
Yeah.
Are you picking up those tees or does the missus do that kind of stuff?
The missus picks up those tees.
She picks it all up.
Yeah.
When's the last time you were clothes shopping?
Last time I was clothes shopping?
I always clothes shop.
You go and get like, you'll go and pick up your little items.
He gets the nice pieces.
Yeah.
He buys pieces, Yanni does.
I go.
Socks and undies?
I go socks.
My socks, I only go to, what's it called?
The Asian store.
No, the Asian one.
What?
With the Asian riding.
Oh, Fuji.
No.
Oh, God.
Aldi's?
No.
That's German supermarket.
I go to that one or the Swedish one?
Muji?
No.
No.
There's that one?
It's the famous one.
Oh, Uniqlo.
Uniqlo.
There you go.
I go to Uniqlo.
You're still rocking Uniqlo?
I go either Uniqlo or I go to the Swedish joint.
I just can't think of the name right now.
Ikea?
No.
What are you talking about?
A lot of meatballs.
Get yourself a dresser.
What's the famous cheap one?
It's a Swedish store.
That's where I get all my socks.
And they're like-
What the fuck is he talking about?
Yeah.
I love-
You guys, when he finds it, when Toby finds it-
Swedish.
You're going to know the store and you're not going to know Swedish.
Lululemon.
Not Lululemon.
TJ Maxx.
They're expensive.
No.
Really?
God, what is it?
I don't think it exists.
It's a version of Old Navy.
It's a Scandinavian version of Old Navy.
Is it Scandinavian or Swedish, man?
H&M.
Well, Sweden is in Scandinavia.
Yeah.
He's got you there.
Got you there, Toby.
Yanni Globes over here.
So dumb.
Yeah.
I got Gruden Choden.
Shit.
H&M?
H&M!
You already just said H&M!
How the fuck is that Swedish?
It's Swedish.
I think he's right.
It is.
Yeah, you see?
I wouldn't call that-
Okay.
I should be saying.
I mean, I thought you were talking about some sort of boutique type thing.
It's from Sweden.
He's right.
I know it is.
It is.
H&M.
H&M.
So I get my socks from H&M.
Really?
They're too bad.
They're not good.
They don't last.
That's why I just keep buying them.
You got to keep-
You know they're bad because they're by the checkout counter.
I just take them off.
I throw-
You guys know, I like to throw a lot of things in the fire pit.
My fire pit is ready for winter.
I love it.
It's got diapers in there.
It's got H&M socks.
Second and trust below 72.
Crank it up, babe!
Get rid of these tees.
That's one thing I enjoy about adulthood and having a little bit of money is I
am very reckless.
I'll grab a fucking nine pack of socks, underwear on the way home and throw
everything I got out.
Yeah.
I'm constantly fucking rotating that stock.
Yeah.
Fresh in there.
Yeah.
Not one fucking, not one expiration date on my own.
I keep it moving.
I like the way he slipped in and got a little money.
I like that right there.
And it's not a lot.
I got socks and t-shirt money, baby.
Hit me up.
I like we started this podcast.
He's got-
You've been going to a hairstylist.
No.
Your hair looks good right now.
He's been using Sonnen and it looks bad.
Oh, is it Sonnen?
Dude, it's bad.
That's all Sonnen.
That's all hydrogen peroxide right there, baby.
Oh, Sonnen.
I thought it looks good.
It looks pretty good.
Sonnen, pretty classy.
Sonnen's all right.
And I don't use Sonnen.
I use Sunbum.
I was being facetious.
Okay, thank you.
Whenever you grab hair product from CVS, you know?
Yeah, that's real dirtbag shit.
Do-it-yourself healthcare, hair care.
That's real fugitive style.
I've been debating this.
You're shaving your face in a public bathroom.
Yeah.
He just murdered your wife.
Yeah, he's in a gas station bathroom rubbing water on his face,
like that cliche movie scene.
And then he's, yeah, Sonnen in there, changes look.
Hide from the cops.
Would you ever dabble in little Just for Grey?
Just for men?
Never.
People think I dye my hair because, you know, I'm in my 40s,
so they're like, how's your hair?
I don't look that good.
I'm like, Greek don't leak, baby.
Yeah, what are you going to say?
Black don't crack, Greek don't leak.
You got the gray here.
I got it right here.
A lot of people get it right here, like the gray or red.
I've been debating, dipping into the-
Oh, it's going to look so bad, dude.
Even the guy on the box looks bad.
If they can't get the box right, you don't stand a chance.
Billy Mays looked pretty good with it, I'll be honest with you.
Do we?
He looked like, no.
Hernandez uses it.
How bad could it be?
No, no, no.
Don't do it.
Because it's like, the color's always too jet black.
Yes, it's too not natural.
Yeah.
You look like the Undertaker's manager.
Ball bear.
Looks painted on, but you got very little.
I know, but it's wild.
You just look like you did a couple lines of Coke and missed.
You were eating powdered donuts on the way here.
I tried to make it a little, you know, because he's looking slimmer.
He is.
He's great.
You're looking good.
I saw you on the treadmill on the ground.
On the treadmill.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was a stunt double, but still.
When he was on the treadmill, did you have 9-1 on dial?
That's what I said.
I said, was there an EMT outside?
I got a lot of messages of encouragement for that, but I also got a handful of
messages
from people in the personal training.
They're like, yo, knock that shit off.
I got one, too.
I was like, you got to knock that shit.
Somebody save him.
I'm like, he's got a higher trainer, I guess.
Here's the thing.
There's like a hot guy in you, like a block of marble.
Yeah.
You're like a Michelangelo statue ready to come out.
I got the little pee-pee.
I can tell you that.
David wasn't rocking anything.
A little light switch.
You chip away a little bit.
There's a fucking hot guy in there.
I'm working on it.
I'm trying.
Yeah.
You got good face symmetry.
Thank you.
Symmetry.
Symmetry.
Yeah.
Sounds like a Greek dessert.
What are you talking about?
I got two symmetries.
That was dinner.
The symmetry was a little cold.
I'm telling you, dude.
I'm the only guy without CTE who talks like he has CTE.
It's weird.
I mean, maybe I do have it.
What?
You outside linebacker?
What's going on?
Words don't come out right.
I'm starting to get to that point, too.
I'm missing a lot of stuff.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Things aren't working 100% up there.
I 