Name: Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Kelly Hart - Cali Kid
Uploaded: 2022-09-15T00:00:45.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Kelly Hart - Cali Kid' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-09-15. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Kelly Hart - Cali Kid' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-09-15. Transcript available.

Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Kelly Hart - Cali Kid

Kip, let's talk about the live shows, baby.
That middle-class famous tour.
That's a good, good time, that middle-class famous tour.
We're coming to a city near you.
It's a stand-up comedy show.
Then we play a little AYG with the crowd.
Fantastic way to introduce new people to the show.
Grab your best guy.
Grab your best gal.
Grab your girlfriends.
Grab your guy friends.
Bring the whole squad and come see us.
Yeah, gang.
Next week, September 13th, we're going to be in Kansas City.
Then September 14th, we're going to be in Springfield.
All right.
Then in September 15th, we're going to be in St. Louis.
Then in October, we're coming to Nashville.
We're going to Indy, November.
We're going to Philly.
Second show out of there.
That's almost sold out.
Get those tickets.
Don't sleep on that.
Then we're coming to Providence, Rhode Island, and Boston in December.
Those shows are sold out at the moment, but we're adding tickets.
Be on the lookout.
Yeah.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals
or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite new podcast.
This is Are You Garbage?
Oh, yeah.
A little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find out they're
going to be classy or just a big old piece of trash.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day.
We're down here in Aunt Tootie's basement.
She just got a brand new ankle bracelet.
Okay, good for her.
I ain't talking about Kay Jewelers either.
All right.
I thought he was going to be home for a little while.
My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
He is the CEO of Are You Garbage?
He is an international businessman.
He's the Prince of Park Avenue, but always the king of the boardwalk, baby.
Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan.
Hey, gang, thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube, as you know those numbers are...
True to rip!
Almost at 100,000, baby.
Let's go.
Let's go.
And then obviously the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com slash RU
Garbage.
Love that money, baby.
Check it the fuck out.
Yes, sir, and have a nice quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire, the
magic man.
Makes us all look good.
He works the ones and twos, crosses the T's and dots the I's, and he's no
stranger to a kickflip.
I can tell you that right now.
Give it up for T-Bone McMuffin, Toby McMullen, everybody.
What up, dudes?
T-Bone.
I'm so hyped.
I've never wanted a guest to think I'm cool more in my entire life.
He's been doing heel flips all morning, dude.
He's fucking stoked right now.
This dude's a poser, man.
Oh, my God.
Oh, man.
T-Bone is all excited.
We are all excited.
We couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly special guest here with us
today for the fourth time.
He's a professional skateboarder and podcaster.
He is team manager at S Shoes, Mob Grip, and Richter Wheels.
He is also a team rider at LRG.
He is sponsored by Visit Skateboards, and you can hear him every week on the
amazing podcast, the Nine Club.
But the big question in everybody's mind today, is he garbage?
I don't know about all that, but he's a cool dude.
He's got a sweet name.
And the kid's fucking smooth as ice on a skateboard.
Give it up for Kelly Hart, everybody.
Wow.
Let's go.
Thank you, bro.
That was incredible.
That was first take.
That was first take.
That was insane.
You guys are amazing.
Oh, man.
I love this guy.
He came in laughing.
I'm like, this is my kind of fucking guy.
Yo, thanks for having me.
This is awesome.
Buddy, thanks for coming, dude.
Buddy, thank you for coming.
Give us the backstory.
L.A. kid, Los Angeles.
Well, technically, Laguna Hills from Orange County.
Okay.
Grew up skateboarding, playing baseball, basketball, football, that stuff.
Really?
Yeah.
I was a full-on jock for days.
Nice.
Two sisters.
I got a dad.
I got a mom.
This guy's got a mom.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Kid's doing all right.
Yeah.
Where'd you meet dad, huh?
I was freaking out.
I have an older dad.
I was like, that is okay.
I got an older dad, younger mom.
Gave it a real Cali.
I like it.
What is Laguna Hills?
It's right next to Laguna Beach.
It's a cool neighborhood.
It's, you know, it's super, it's pretty nice.
A little bit of cash.
A little what?
A little bit of cash.
A little bit of money.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Laguna Beach would be just.
I mean, it's like middle class, nice.
Okay.
You know what I mean?
Parents have families.
My dad's an ER doctor.
Mom's a nurse.
Nice.
Okay.
My sister's a lawyer.
Her husband's a plastic, no, an orthopedic surgeon.
Whoa.
These are learned people.
A dentist.
Her husband's an oral surgeon, and I'm just a skateboarder.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
Got you out in front of the 7-Eleven.
But, you know, it's super cool.
I think I was the baby boy, so they kind of like let me do it.
Let you do whatever.
Nice.
Like, you know, I think when parents, I don't know, I don't have kids, but when
they had
my first sister, they were real strict.
Sure.
And then they had another one, they were strict on her, and then I'm the baby
boy, and they're
like, oh, he's cool.
Yeah, just let him go.
Yeah.
I never got attention in high school.
I was, like, super nice little kid.
I just paid attention to what I wanted to do.
I got into skateboarding, and it just took over my life.
What age?
Yeah.
When did you get-
I started skating, I think, at 11 years old.
Okay.
And it, like, I played sports and everything like that, but I, in high school,
I figured,
like, I don't like having, like, a schedule where, like, hey, you have to go to
practice
after school and practice for two hours and do all that stuff, and that was all
year because
I played every sport.
Damn.
And so then I was skating on the side, and then I kind of just, hey, mom, I'm
done.
How did you see, what was the first skateboard that you were, like, exposed to?
Because it's always, like, an older kid in the neighborhood, or there's always,
like,
some sort of romance where you're like, oh, I want to do what that kid's
fucking doing.
Yeah, for sure.
So my parents had a beach house in San Clemente.
I grew up surfing.
Okay.
And then my neighbor, he came skating down the street one day, and he just had
a skateboard.
I saw him and his little brother and my friend, and I was like, whoa, what?
And then I kind of had one before, but it was, like, I'd ride down the driveway
in my ass
and, like, you know, just a little kitchen on it.
Yeah, I did the same thing.
Now you're speaking my language.
That's as far as I got.
Yeah.
I skinned my knee, and I was like, I'm going back to football.
Well, dude, like, when I was a kid, too, it was like, you would go, I had lived
on this
hill, so I would, my mom would buy me a brand new pair of shoes, and I'd get on
the board
and just fire down the hill, putting my feet on, my ass on the ground, destroy
a pair of
shoes, literally an hour, and she would just get super pissed.
But anyway, my friends skated down.
They showed me you could do this thing called an ollie, and I kind of just, I
was like, well,
that's kind of cool, and then I started to learn it, and it took a long time to
learn,
like, that first stuff, but then you realize there was this open, like, huge,
vast world
you could live, like, just all the spots that are out there, all the tricks you
could do,
and it was just kind of eye-opening, and I kind of just went down the rabbit
hole.
You got into, like, the scene and all that stuff.
Yeah, it took a while to get into that, because there wasn't really a big skate
scene.
I mean, there was, but it was, like, I don't know, there weren't skaters at my
school.
Okay.
How old are you feeling, am I asking?
I'm 37.
So when you were, because when I was a kid, there was no skate parks, there was
none of
that stuff.
It was all, like...
He's 104 years old.
Back in my day, you whippersnappers on your skateboard.
You're going to scare my horse.
What are you doing, young man?
But, no, it was all, like, you know, it was, like, parking lots and stuff like
that,
kids getting chased out and stuff like that, and I feel like it wasn't until
your guys'
generation where people started, you know, like, where...
It started to become a little more mainstream at that time.
Because we're the same age, and I skated until I was horrible.
I never really got past the ollie.
I was good at cruising.
But, no, like, that's...
It was...
There was, like, a bit of a boom, I feel, at that, for kids that age at that
time, like,
the early 2000s or whatever.
Yeah, I think, you know, my friends started doing it, and then I saw skate
videos, and
that's what really opened my eye.
Because you're, like, I didn't even...
There was a video called Toby Knows 4-in-1.
Yeah.
And it was just, like, this...
These, like, monthly, bi-monthly videos that came out that just showed you
skateboarding,
and you got to, like, hear the music to see the way they dressed.
And I was introduced to, like, you know, Southern California skateboarding, and
then East Coast
skateboarding, and seeing, like, Philadelphia and New York.
Yeah.
But I'm, like, this little white kid in, like, you know, Orange County, and I'm,
like, this
is so fucking cool.
I didn't know that there was, like, this big world of, like, just...
There's no organized...
Like, there's no organization of it.
Sure.
It's just go out and do what you want to do.
Oh, yeah.
You know what I mean?
And so that's what kind of, like, led me to it, and literally just took over.
We talk about this all the time.
Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld said this in either Comedians in Cars or something
like that.
He said, you know who's going to be all right is the skateboard guys.
Because you see them, and you know that they had to fall so many times to be
able to perfect
something.
Yeah, for sure.
Like, just getting back up and doing it again.
Yeah.
I think that is the big parallel with stand-up, too.
And I started watching all those Epically Laiderds from way back, and I just,
like, this
was, like, a few years ago, and it's, like, with stand-up, or, you know, with
stand-up
and skateboarding, it's success through constant failure.
Yeah, yeah.
It's, like, you only succeed one out of a hundred times.
Yeah.
Whether it's a joke, whether it's landing a trick or whatever, so it's, like,
it's that
constant failure that I was, like, oh, it's so similar mentality-wise.
Yeah, I trip out because you, I feel like comedy, like, when you guys tell a
joke and
it bombs or something, like, you're just taking that emotional, like, that
emotional beating
right there, and then skateboarding is, like, more physical.
Sure, yeah.
Oh, of course.
You're just, like, falling, falling, falling.
That's the thing.
It's wild.
I always just tripped on that.
I trip out on you guys doing stand-up, and you guys are hilarious, but, like,
it's, like,
wild for me to, like, get up in front of people and just be, like, just, you
guys, I watched
something of you guys just, like...
You know what else is wild?
Jumping down 10 stairs, all right?
It's a little tough...
You fucking lunatic?
Yeah.
I'd rather bomb than fall off a loading dock.
I'm not going to lie to you.
He's like, you guys are crazy.
Telling jokes for 12 people.
You're ollieing it off the fucking roof of my house.
I totally would rather get, like, bombed instead of jumping off a loading dock.
Dude, what is the broken bone situation to date?
Dislocated my ankle once, or I broke ankle.
Oh, my gosh.
Foot once, ankle dislocation once, broke my ankle another time, and then I had
a hip surgery,
like, out of nowhere.
Like, I had this thing called hip impediment.
That kind of would, like, slow me down a lot.
Wait, was it because of skating?
It was just repetitive skateboarding for 20 years.
Jesus.
And it was this one day, I was like, oh, my God, what is that?
I didn't even know what it was.
I had to go look into it, and, like, lucki