Name: Cleaning with Underwear - Are You Garbage LIVE: Stand Up comedy (2022)
Uploaded: 2022-11-26T17:30:54.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Cleaning with Underwear - Are You Garbage LIVE: Stand Up comedy (2022)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-11-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Cleaning with Underwear - Are You Garbage LIVE: Stand Up comedy (2022)' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-11-26. Transcript available.

This one is just, have you ever smoked a cig in a hot tub?
It's too hot for some reason.
It doesn't work, man. You're sweating. It's too hot.
That's all right.
Relaxing.
All right, we gotta get moving here.
Where's Jen B at?
Jenny, where you at? You here, hon?
What's your name?
Well, I'm Jen ****** now.
She's married now.
Would your email be Jen B?
Jerry Sanders.
What?
Yeah, it's her.
What the fuck is going on in Kansas slash Missouri slash the 1800s right now?
That might be me.
You act like you got married in between the show.
Well, I don't go by that name anymore.
But for the first 22 years of my life, I was Jen B.
I don't know if that's...
Did you email me a bunch?
Yeah, like six or something.
Yeah, okay, that is you, yeah.
Well played, Jen B. Well played.
I like the husband.
Yeah, that's her.
Don't worry.
She's all right.
She's cool.
She's cool.
Just don't touch your ears.
You'll be all right.
I promise you.
Fucking awesome.
This is the wackiest one we've ever done.
I've got to do that same shit, answer for like, that's fine.
It's okay.
That's great.
Hi.
And where are you from, Jen?
I'm from Middle East, Missouri.
Missouri, okay.
Nice.
And you're here with your husband?
Yeah.
Very nice.
How long have you guys been married?
Three and a half years.
Very nice.
Where'd you guys get married at?
Vegas.
All right.
There we go.
There we go.
Finally some class in here.
Didn't get shacked up at some bake sale in the basement of Missouri.
Had a fucking...
Eight and lemon squares.
These two were getting turnt the fuck up.
Was it somewhat traditional in Vegas?
We went to a chapel.
Yeah, they were drunk.
I didn't sleep the night before, so I was like trying to stay with it.
Say no more, brother.
Say no more.
All right.
All right, Jen.
Is it garbage to use...
Okay.
Is it garbage to use grandpa's cut up tighty-whities to dust the house?
Now that's Missouri shit right there.
You didn't cut them off of them, did you?
Quit squirming, god damn it.
The coffee table's a mess.
It ain't here.
I mean, man, why?
What?
How much are paper towels out here?
Does grandpa...
Can I get a cup of coffee up here, please?
And a monster for the guy in the second row.
Is this something your family did?
Yes.
Okay.
But when did they do this?
My grandma.
Your grandmother did this.
So this is at your grandfather in your grandmother's house.
And your grandfather's underwear got a little frayed or whatever.
Or shit his pants.
They would go into the rag bin.
And your grandmother would cut them up and use them for different things around
the household.
Sorry, what were you saying?
They weren't new underwear, though.
Yeah.
A bit.
A bit.
A bit.
Come on.
No, no.
Now you're trying to save face.
Yeah.
They were pre-owned.
Yeah.
They weren't certified, though.
Yeah.
There was a couple miles on them.
Yeah.
They were bought at a lot, not at dealership, if they were a car.
Man, Patty would do it with, like, t-shirts and stuff and underwear.
Underwear.
White, like, tighty-whities, right?
Yeah.
Damn.
Yellow lines and all that.
Wait, yellow lines from what?
From doo-doo.
What do you think, idiot?
No, from what?
I'm sorry.
The stitching would have yellow.
That was pee.
Yeah, but what brand has yellow?
Yellow.
What?
That guy just woke up, by the way.
Where the fuck did you come from?
God damn.
He was sleeping the whole time.
Fucking research and development over at Haynes.
Actually, in the 1970s, they started a cross-stitching program where they used
yellow thread up the
back and through the testicular area.
Let's go right back to sleep.
It's kind of trashy.
What?
No, that's very trashy.
Wait, what is this?
That says as long as it wasn't the dishes.
You're coming home with us.
I'll tell you that right now.
You say goodbye to whoever you've got to.
You're coming home with me.
Dude, I wouldn't want you cleaning my toilet with old underwear.
All right.
One more time for Jim.
Yeah, that was beautiful.
Beautiful.
God damn.