Name: Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Sal Vulcano Returns!
Uploaded: 2023-09-10T23:00:08.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Sal Vulcano Returns!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Sal Vulcano Returns!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-10. Transcript available.

Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: Sal Vulcano Returns!

Are you garbage? If your tux has a stain on it and you wear it anyway, then
when you get to the wedding, you immediately spill something on yourself in
front of a crowd to make it look like it happened there so everybody is none
the wiser.
I respect the f***ing move.
Richie, what are you doing? Ah, f***ing.
Pete gets there. Someone get me meatballs. Stand.
Gang, get your tickets for all the cities on the State Trashy Tour at areyougarbage.com.
Gang, before we get the episode started, let's talk about our good friends at
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One more time, that's mintmobile.com slash garbage, and let's get to the show.
Yeah.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage?
The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals
or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's new favorite podcast.
This is Are You Garbage?
Oh, yeah.
It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find out
if the group to be classy or just a big old piece of trash.
Trash, trash, trash.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day.
We're out back here at Tootie's in the new edition.
Uh-huh.
I just saw her out front. She was paying off a Little League umpire.
Okay.
Yeah, bet on the Spartans this year.
All right.
My co-host is coming at you from right next to me.
I kind of got him this week a little bit, right?
There's a little bit of a chuckle there.
Smirk.
He is the CEO of Are You Garbage?
He is an international businessman, but always the king of the boardwalk, baby.
Give it up for KJ, Kevin James Ryan.
What's up, gang?
Thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
As you know, those numbers are.
Shroo to roo.
Cooking.
Then, obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com slash RU Garbage,
gang.
Sign up over there.
It's a gosh darn party.
Yes, sir.
And how about a nice quick shout out to our producer extraordinaire, the magic
man, makes
us all look good.
Works the ones, the twos, the threes, and the fours.
He crosses the T's, and he dots the I's.
Give it up for T-Bone McScruffins.
Toby McMullen, everybody.
What up, dudes?
What up, T-Bone?
What up, pal?
Man, talk about a guy who comes in with just, like, dope uncle vibes.
Yeah.
Like, he's got $2 bills for all the kids, man.
He's an all-time hang.
Ah, man.
Uncle Sal at Christmas.
I'd be hovering around you.
Are you kidding me?
Get the door for you, sir?
Woo!
That's true, actually.
You would not be waiting on a drink.
I'm the guy who knows Christmas.
Yeah.
Gang, we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean incredibly
special guest
back with us again today.
We absolutely love him.
You guys love him.
He is on tour right now.
And this is all leading up to a brand new special that he's going to be
recording at the Vic
Theater in Chicago, Illinois, which goes on pre-sale September 13th and 14th,
and goes on full
sale September 15th.
Give it up for Sal Vulcano.
Thank you.
How was that?
Was that all right?
That was great.
I will say that the pre-sale code is no press.
Yeah!
Get those tickets, man.
Thank you very much.
I appreciate it.
Congratulations, buddy.
Thank you so much.
Look at you.
It's so good to see you guys.
Thank you, man.
I haven't seen you in a minute.
Thanks, pal.
I love you both.
Thank you.
I love all of you guys.
I got to just say one thing.
Sure.
Out of every single podcast, we're all comics.
We all have podcasts.
We all are in the same little click together.
Out of all the podcasts, I swear, there's none that is as well put together,
conceptualized,
and then conceived and done better than you guys.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
And I really, truly, truly, from the bottom of my heart, mean that.
Thank you, buddy.
Everything works together, and it just is amazing.
You guys carve this thing out, and it's the most fun podcast to do, and it just,
you know,
it's like when a comic is like a young comic.
Yeah, you got to find your voice.
You got to find your voice.
This podcast is just pitch perfect.
Oh, man.
I'm steaming up over here.
No press.
Be funny.
Talk about fucking building you up to break you down.
All right, guys.
Take care.
Thank you, guys.
We were going to hit you up for money, but now I guess we can't.
Do you, speaking of that, do you go around at Christmas and everybody gets a
little something
with the younger kids and the fam?
My birthday is November 6th, so as a kid, I used to take all my birthday money,
save it,
and use it on Christmas gifts.
Nice.
I kind of like, I don't know, I just, I love Christmas.
I bought weed.
I continue that tradition.
I'm the guy, no joke, when you said that, I'm like, oh, you don't even know,
because
I like have a note in my phone, a note page that's like potentially Christmas
gifts.
So I'm always adding to it.
So if I see or think or see something someone likes like six months earlier,
nine months earlier,
or I see something I think someone will like, I make a running list.
And then I, because I literally take it to Christmas, people are always just
like, and
my family, you know, and extended family and friends, they're just like, I can't
wait
to open this because I know you've been putting some thought into this.
Oh, dude, that's awesome.
We have an Uncle Frank in our family, and when he would show up on Christmas
Day, he'd always
have an envelope for all the kids just in his pocket.
Like Donnie Brosco?
Oh, I love that scene.
It was like he was at a nail salon.
We'd be all over him.
That's always when you clock them when they come in, and if you see the
envelope, you're
like, oh, can I get you something?
What do you need?
My dad's grandma, Grandma Rose, she did this thing.
I don't know why she did it, but it was great.
And we just always like, that's the way it was.
When you were leaving, like, it's like, a lot of grandmas do it, but she like,
really,
like, every time she'd be like, on the way out, she'd hit me with a five, and
be like,
don't tell nobody.
Yeah.
Now, I don't know why she was so scared of that information getting back.
Yeah, they're always real hesitant, like they stole it or something.
Five bucks.
Yeah.
And she used to say, don't, don't say nothing.
If the cops ask you, you found that.
You'll want to shoot and dice in the AC.
Don't tell anybody is, all right?
See me on the street, you call me Larry.
But, yeah, there was something, that made it even more cooler.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I was like, all right, I won't say nothing.
Yeah.
Dude, I had an aunt who still, like, up until maybe two or three years ago,
would still hit
me with, like, 30 or 40 at Christmas.
I would be like, I'm doing, because I needed it for so long.
Right, right, right.
I'm like, I'm doing fine.
It's okay.
She didn't believe you?
No, nobody did.
Nobody did.
Yeah.
You almost still want to accept it, because it's like a thing.
You don't want to feel bad, but I'm also like, I'm balding.
Like, I don't need your money.
You know what I mean?
Like, even if I needed it, I still, like, I have some pride here.
Right.
If I need this $30 at this point in my life, I need more than $30.
Yeah, exactly.
$30 is not getting me out of the red, you know?
Your checkbook on you, man.
I'm jammed up.
You ever see that Seinfeld up?
Sure.
When she's sending checks, he never cashes them.
Oh, yeah.
Chemical bank.
Yes, yes.
Of course.
The bank burned.
I love it.
What am I doing?
Creamy gives him crap, but then he goes and cashes them all.
She's so withdrawing.
Yeah.
She goes down to the bank first thing in the morning.
Yeah.
What you want to do is make two lefts, go down.
Yeah.
It's great.
I didn't know you were a big sign guy, are you?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Ooh.
Yeah, I used to come home, I was way into it.
I mean, I'd catch it like the first run in like 90 when it got canceled and
brought back.
Sure.
But as I came back, I was on board big.
And I used to deliver pizza, and my shift would end at 11.
But if there was no customers, you could mop and get ready so that like at 10.50,
sometimes
my boss would be like, get out of here.
I live five minutes away.
I used to literally speed home because I didn't know how to work the timer on
the VCR.
That was, yeah.
But I used to tape the Seinfeld episode 11 on VHS, and I have a marble notebook
to this
day where I would write the episode and write the three or four plot points on
it and keep
a log.
And then I would log, and I had all the video cassettes before it came out like
on video
and stuff like that.
Yeah.
It is an education on how to write.
I mean, that's why you have a very successful TV show.
It's that stuff.
You look back and you're like, oh, yeah, you were breaking down the plots of Seinfeld.
Yeah, absolutely.
Damn.
I actually met Jerry in January 1995.
I was 18.
What were you doing?
You were 18.
No, I was 95.
I was 18.
Yeah, I was 18.
Delivered him a calzone.
Stiffed me on a tip.
You believe that?
All that residual money?
I wasn't.
So I went on my first ever plane ride with two friends to California.
I'd never been on a plane before.
And we went to crash at my friend's older cousin was in a rock band called
Sister Whiskey.
Nice.
That's a pretty good name.
That's a pretty good band thing.
Right?
And it was back when there was still that good old time rock and roll, like a
poison type
of thing.
Sure.
And they signed a deal with Warner Brothers, and they had one single that came
out.
And it was like, wow, we got to go.
So we went there.
We crashed on this couch for two weeks.
It was my first time on a plane.
You probably felt famous.
You're crashing on the couch of Whiskey Sisters bass player.
It was.
Well, he had a rabbit that shit everywhere, and he didn't even pick it up.
So I didn't feel too famous.
Man, these guys are really rock and roll.
There were two couches and then the floor.
There was three of us.
So there was definitely days I was on the floor amongst the rabbit shit.
Yikes.
But it was a blast nonetheless.
What was young Sal's style back then?
Were you living the Motley Crue lifestyle?
I was grunge at that time.
Okay.
I had hair down to here.
Really?
Oh, yeah, yeah, man.
I could show you some pics, you know, if you want to stay a little late after
class.
Check out my office hours.
But we went out there, and just by chance, one night we went to eat at Jerry's
Famous Deli.
No relation.
No, there really is no relation.
It's a restaurant out there.
There's like three or four of them.
Okay.
Sure.
We were in there.
We were just eating, and it's closer to their closing time.
And when we walked in, there was two sheet cakes right at the front in the foyer
area.
It said, nothing fancy.
This place is like a glorified diner.
Yeah.
It said, congratulations, Seinfeld, on your 100th episode.
So we sat down.
The waiter comes over.
I'm like, what is this?
And he goes, oh, yeah, they'll be here tonight.
And I go, what?
They'll be in this place?
He goes, they actually come every single week right after the taping.
Oh, shit.
It's a tradition.
And they've been doing it for years, and they have a meal together here.
So they rented out the place when we closed, and the whole cast, crew,
everything's coming.
He had to celebrate it.
Damn.
And I said, you're kidding.
I mean, at the time, he was my idol already.
I remember that 100th episode.
Yeah.
You think that's where they went afterwards?
Right, right.
And I go, okay, so is there any way we could stay?
He's just like, I can't do that.
He's dressed up like a busboy.
More water, Mr. Seinfeld.
I thought ab