Name: Are You Garbage Drinks Around the World: Patreon Preview
Uploaded: 2023-11-14T16:59:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Drinks Around the World: Patreon Preview' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-11-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Drinks Around the World: Patreon Preview' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-11-14. Transcript available.

If you want me to get drunk for Patreon, I'll do it.
I'm not the drunk you want, I'm the drunk you need.
The walk-in's gonna be brutal on this one.
Oh, man.
There hasn't been any complaints, though.
I'm not gonna be the person you expect me to be anymore.
On camera.
Might not be the hero that you want, but I'm the one you need.
I'm gonna sing under the world, I'm gonna sing under the water.
I'm doing a world, I'm gonna sing and I'm gonna sing.
Typically around China, I start getting fuzzy.
Grab it, bud.
How are you?
Can I do a LeBath Blue and an Ottawa Apple?
Canada, you stink, but we love you.
Here's to, uh, what's in Canada?
Ooh, that's all right.
Here's to maple syrup and hockey fights, baby.
It's good, it's Cranberry, Canadian Club.
These are LeBath Blues.
Ottawa Apple.
We used to call these Big and Tasty's back in the day in high school.
Drink them in the wintertime, stay warm, go ice fishing.
All right, this one's going down quick.
Kipi, kipi, kipi.
So cold.
Your teeth, get your teeth cold.
It's Canada, what do you expect?
Those goddamn Canucks keep it cold, baby.
Oh, I see.
Dude, that was delicious.
I just drank half of Canada.
Edna, welcome to England, chap.
Hello, mate.
You got the results of the Liverpool match.
Yeah, 22, 37.
They made me pay in pounds.
Goddamn redcoats.
These conversion rates are killing me.
I know, I'm killing me.
I thought the Queen died.
What are we doing?
New King's a pussy.
I see the New King, I'm going to run up on him.
Hey, Nate.
To Mr. Bean.
Shout out to Mr. Bean.
And the Graham Norton Show.
And baked beans.
Yeah.
I thought this was a light beer.
It's all right.
It's all right, though.
It's all right.
It's kind of got a milkshake taste to it.
Technically, the rule is you can't take a beer into another country.
You know what I mean?
Import and exporting purposes.
You've got to have to pay tax on it.
Welcome to London Town.
Just touched down in London Town.
Nah, nah.
Not that I know anything.
I've only been to London for a weekend.
I mean, I had a layover in Heathrow one time.
Not bragging.
I went outside of customs, had a Bernie.
It was the first time I was ever in London.
Popped outside, boots on the ground, lit them up.
Count it.
Count it.
It's a country.
I'm going to stand my passport.
I think they're pumping something in the air.
There's definitely some kind of fragrance.
He used drinks every 14 feet.
Reality should just be this.
Everything should look like this.
Every town, every street.
It should be all hooked up.
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
Je m'appelle Drog.
My friend is here to get shit based.
Hello, I have a fat man and a bald man.
Who did they drink, eh?
Oh, no.
I think the ones I like are from over here, actually.
I have a drinking problem.
I know where, what huts sell the drinks that I like here.
I'm not reading, dude.
I'm just ordering.
I'm going in the flow.
I'm in a flow state right now.
Just ordering.
If I see it, I order.
If I see it, I like it, I order.
Sharp shooter.
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
Bonjour, mademoiselle.
Oh, I am here to black out and eat some frog legs, no?
Got it.
This is just people getting fucked up.
Now that I look around a little bit, that one girl's eating Pringles.
But other than that, this is just people getting fucked up.
That is correct.
This is going to get weird towards the end of this.
We'll be talking to strangers.
That's the kind of drunk I feel like I'm in front of.
Cheers, buddy.
Cheers.
Bonsoir, monsieur, madame.
Parlez-vous anglais, s'il vous plaît.
Merci beaucoup.
That's how much French I know.
The French kiss is a bold job, so...
Hey, shout-out to the Freedom Fry, huh?
How good is that thing?
I love you guys' podcast.
What's up, brother?
Thank you, man.
I appreciate that.
Look at us.
Drinking a cup of popcorn.
Cheers, boys.
I'm a trash bag.
Cheers, big dog.
My man.
Appreciate it, dog.
This place is just people getting fucked up.
Where are we?
It's wild, right?
Haters are a must.
I'm going to get thrown out for fucking trying to get a sneaky cig.
You're going to burn down a bathroom.
I'm going to burn down a bazaar.
That's basically a weapon.
Egypt is killing our buzz a little bit.
Somebody's got to pay off some cops.
Kibby's been waiting in the line for about 20 minutes.
And I'm getting sketchy.
Daddy needs his juice juice.
I knew he'd get banged up in here.
We're in Morocco.
What'd I say?
Egypt.
Egypt.
Oh, yeah?
Do you think chicks look at me and they're like,
dude, that guy's so hot.
Give me a pan.
Give us a fit check.
Socks that I got for Christmas.
Black ankles.
Left ankles a little bit swollen.
Prescription knockoff crocs that were my dad's.
How much?
I have no idea.
They get them through like they're podiatrists.
They were my dad's medicated crocs that are knockoffs.
They're not real crocs.
They were made.
Shorts.
How much?
Shorts are like probably 10 bucks in dicks.
These were also my dad's.
T-shirt.
T-shirt.
How much is that?
T-shirt's 30.
That's DXL.
They give me it for 20 if you get over three.
Sunglasses.
Sunglasses.
How much are those?
Sunglasses I got at that place with the fishing walleye wherever you were in
New York.
Now they're probably like 15.
Fit check complete.
Fit check complete.
Where are they at?
Shout out to the Tangine.
How about that?
Very nice.
Do you have anything else Moroccan?
Sandals?
They kept us waiting a long time, I'll tell you that.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Do you have other things to do today besides to get blackout drunk?
Just pop a squat.
So you don't want to do push-ups or anything?
I mean, it ain't France.
You got two in.
It ain't France.
It ain't the creamsicle bangers.
I mean, there ain't nothing better than that.
Aftertaste ain't great on it.
What is it, like turmeric or something?
Turmeric?
Turmeric.
There you go.
That was unfortunate.
I ain't gonna lie.
I'm gonna wind up.
Yeah, dude.
You drink four or five drinks in 12 minutes.
That'll do it to you.
We got like 19 more countries to go.
No way.
No.
Hopefully one of them sells dogees.
They're gonna borrow once we're in Italy?
They say no time to be keto.
I'm thinking that right now.
International Epcot laws say all drinks must be finished prior to border
crossing.
Sir?
I'm gonna need you to swallow that ice.
Let's take a breather.
Get China, get some fried risers on.
Let's go.
I could use a badger.
And maybe a soft pretzel or something.
Get my head on straight.
Get a couple of carbs to soak this stuff up.
This is gonna be, I think, here's my predictions.
Yeah.
I think it's gonna be an impressive tour.
I think it's gonna be, they're really gonna show up.
They came to play.
They got a game mentality.
They're passionate.
They're here to drink around the world.
And I think they're gonna do it.
I thought I was walking with you guys.
And those two dudes are like, would you be interested in joining my family?
I was like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
They're like, what are we talking about?
Where's Godzilla?
All right, apparently my Japanese isn't as good as I thought, and they gave me
mini beers.
Little mini beers, dude.
That's what I'm talking about.
What's pony in Japan?
I don't know.
I'll tell you what, I'm hurting.
Shout out to Japan for the mini beers.
Love it.
They said you have to chug them now.
You'll dishonor your family.
Wow.
Whoa.
That's like raspberry.
That was great.
That was like a cider.
A few more mini beers for me and my friends, please.
Coming up on the good old US of A, baby.
Boots on the ground.
Good to be back in the States, my fellow countrymen.
Grab the fentanyl, huh?
Paul, you grab drinks.