Name: Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: The Incredible Hulk w/ Kippy & Foley!
Uploaded: 2024-09-15T23:00:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: The Incredible Hulk w/ Kippy & Foley!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-15. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: The Incredible Hulk w/ Kippy & Foley!' from AreYouGarbage? Comedy Podcast on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-15. Transcript available.

Are You Garbage Comedy Podcast: The Incredible Hulk w/ Kippy & Foley!

Hold on there, gang. New York City, New York, do yourself a favor.
Come out to the Gramercy Theater October 1st for the second edition of the AYG
and Friends show.
We had such a great time there in September. Come out and see the gang.
Yeah, we've invited some of our favorite and your favorite guests and friends
to come answer your garbage questions.
The Gramercy Theater, 10-1. All tickets available at RUGarbage.com. Do it.
Welcome to another exciting edition of RUGarbage, the show where you find out
if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash.
Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast.
This is RUGarbage.
Oh, yeah.
It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find out
if they're good to be classy.
Yeah.
If they're just a big old piece of trash.
Trash, trash, trash.
I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here
at Tootie's in a new edition.
She just hit a deer.
Mm-hmm.
She was jogging, throwing elbows, man.
That Saquon Barkley's got her all fired up.
That's my lane, baby.
My co-host is coming at you from across the table. He is the CEO of RUGarbage.
He is an international businessman. He's the chicken parm hero.
Look out. Give it up for KJ.
Kevin James Ryan, everybody.
What up, gang?
Shout out to you. Thanks for tuning in.
As always, please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes.
Full video available on YouTube.
Then, obviously, the greatest website of all time.
You pull out your little phone, your little tablet, your laptop, whatever you
got.
You go to www.patreon.com.
Slash RUGarbage.
You get all the bonus content needs, gang.
I'm talking weekly episodes.
Sure.
Of bonus episodes of AYG.
Weekly episodes of Hard Feelings, which I got to let you.
Yeah, that's where the rubber hits the road there, baby.
And then, all the bonus videos we've done over the past three, four years.
Ireland.
Down the shore.
Walt Disney World.
The hot dog videos.
The Cribs videos.
The camping videos.
Everything's on there.
Plus, the new one is-
We got a hot new goal.
Hot new challenge.
War.
The paintball channel.
I'm talking war games, baby.
Me versus H Foley.
Paintball extravaganza.
Doing it in real urban environments, too.
Doing it in your apartment building?
Flying down to South America.
Knocking over some government down there with a couple of paintballs and a
couple of guys
that don't know how to say no.
Real Bay of Pigs thing we got going on here.
Me and you on the beach.
I got a Corona.
We got a sunscreen.
Gang, we're here for what we like to call a little family episode.
Just the boys, the bozos, and the homies.
We're going to be answering your questions from the old Patrione.
Before we get into that, I got to reveal something here.
Never a good sign from the beach.
If you ever wonder why we're the host of this show, let me tell you something.
That Patty Foley never ceases to amaze me.
Sure.
I've been spending some time with her.
We go out to dinner.
We're riding out to dinner.
We get to dinner.
We're talking.
We start talking about methylated vitamins.
That's what Foley's big on right now, by the way.
He thinks that's going to turn the ship around.
Gary Brecke, hit me up.
I'm tanking here.
Maybe I need vitamins here.
Maybe.
I need less vitamins.
Lay off the hoagies.
You know what I mean.
Sure.
Do pharmaceutical.
Anyway, we start talking.
We start kind of talking about that stuff.
About what's in our food supply.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Real tinfoil hat situation, I feel.
I mentioned, what's the stuff called?
Gas phospholate?
The stuff that's in Roundup.
Oh, I don't know.
Whatever that stuff.
Sure.
The bad stuff in Roundup.
Yeah.
And then she happens to mention to me, very offhanded, because I'm like, you
know, it's
a good thing we never really had that stuff.
She's like, oh, what are you talking about?
She's like, I got airline tickets from them.
What do you mean?
Do you remember back in the day, the only trip that we ever really took when I
was a
kid that we flew is we flew out to see my cousins in, they lived in, by Lake
Tahoe.
Okay.
We flew to San Francisco.
It was right after the big earthquake in 89.
That's when you're going to get stuff.
Big earthquake.
The natural disaster, the Foley's start buying plane tickets.
Landing was a little bumpy.
I remember driving around San Francisco being like, are we supposed to be here?
Like, it was a few months after, I think.
FEMA tents set up and everything.
Yeah.
I want to say maybe that happened in October, because I could have swore that
happened during
the World Series or something.
Sure.
We were there that summer.
I don't know what kind of deal they got on tickets, but it turns out, I guess,
Patty
was using a lot of Roundup at the time, which we weren't farmers.
We had no livestock, no chickens, no grain, no feed.
And this is when it was probably the worst for you.
Yeah.
We were a Roundup family for sure.
Yeah.
It worked.
Everybody was.
I mean, they were pumping out on the commercials.
Roundup.
Roundup.
Of course.
Well, I guess they had some type of deal that if you bought enough of it.
If you buy in bulk.
You got some airline tickets.
And that's, she told me, she's like, that's how I afford, that's how I could
afford our
airline tickets to go out to see your cousins when you were a kid.
Roundup.
I got two free tickets, two free Roundtrip tickets.
Roundup, Roundtrip.
That's pretty good.
That's why I'm an international businessman, baby.
Always be closing.
Synergy, gang.
Synergy.
Vertical integration.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
That was her big thing.
And it was also a big deal at the time that my dad took a Mac flight out there.
What the hell's a Mac flight?
He was in the back of a fucking C-130.
He took a, he didn't fly with us.
Like Con Air?
What are you talking about?
I've had to have told you about this.
No.
Yeah.
Your dad's flying cargo?
Cross country?
He was in the goddamn Navy.
So they have flights.
They're called Mac flights.
Or they were called Mac flights.
I don't know what that meant.
Just called cheap ass motherfuckers.
Yeah.
He flew in like a jump seat in a C-130 from Willow Grove to, I want to say
Sacramento or something
like that.
I went to that air show, the Willow Grove air show.
I used to go all the time.
Yeah.
He used to work.
He worked the booth.
He had a booth.
They had a recruiting booth.
Oh, no shit.
I had all the, all the, all the, all the, I might have seen you there.
I remember being hot as shit.
And I was, dude, I was wearing, a tarmac in August.
I was, I was wearing shiny planes.
I was wearing silk boxers at the time.
It was a dude.
In case you met a pilot.
Dude, talk about.
You're ready for business.
Bunch up.
I had a jumpsuit going on myself.
The parachute got you, dude.
It was.
Talk about a canopy.
Dude, it was, it was.
I remember being like, this was a bad choice.
That's how you only had one pair of silk underwear.
I did.
For having one pair, they really got around.
I wasn't big on laundry.
I didn't like doing a laundry.
Jesus.
No, but, yeah, I remember being so, I remember fucking.
They were always so hot.
It was like when you could see the fucking heat.
Yeah, it was like a montage in Top Gun.
Yeah, it was brutal.
Yeah, it was tough.
But I remember I got a cool pocket knife there.
Pocket knife?
I was big on pocket knives for a very long time.
Someone just gave that to you.
What?
They didn't sell pocket knives at an air show?
Yeah, they did.
There was like vendor booths.
Really?
Yeah.
Mine was all military.
I don't know which one you were at.
You sure it was a set with the Blue Angels there?
I don't know.
Well, if they weren't that, then you were at a fucking circus.
I don't even think I, I know, because I grew up not far from the Willow Grove
Air Base,
and I don't remember seeing any planes.
It might have just been a flea market, now that I think about it.
Yeah, you would.
I might have just went to a flea market.
Guy like you, how are you getting on the base?
You got no credentials.
I used to have the ID and everything.
What?
I did.
I had a military ID.
This is, here we go.
When I was a kid.
Here we go.
To get on the base so we could go to the Navy Exchange.
Stop acting like you did anything.
The Navy Exchange was like, but they're like bad grocery stores on, on, on.
Yeah, I can buy bruised apples myself.
I don't need, I don't need to go to a fucking air base.
That's where we'd always go to get liquor for like a Christmas party.
I was, they had some deal.
Maybe it was duty free or something like that.
Yeah.
Go over there and load up on liquor for the big celebration.
Ah, the pina colada mix.
I remember when I, I remember first seeing that stuff and like, I thought there
was booze
in there.
Sometimes there is.
Yeah, not the one I snuck.
I just got off.
I thought my teeth were going to fall out of my mouth.
Dude, that's a lot of sugar.
I remember my dad making me virgin pina coladas when we were a kid, if we were
out of ice
cream.
I'm like, you wonder why I'm up.
What are you, working a hole at hands?
Who does that?
That's crazy.
Ah, shit.
We're 86 ice cream.
I'll make him a mocktail real quick.
Put him to bed.
Mocktail?
That's...
The guy's trying to shut me up.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
He would break out the blender and make a pina colada.
I was the only one in the family that touched him.
My brother thought it was gross.
I thought it was delicious.
Were you a divorcee?
That's living in Key West.
Dude, that's crazy.
Just fucking crushing pina coladas?
Yeah.
Me and my old man.
No, there's no booze in mine.
I don't think.
God, I got pretty sleepy afterwards.
I don't know if it was out of the sugar, but...
Yeah, probably blood sugar's fucking spiking, dude.
Yeah, it was all right.
Uh-huh.
That and he had strawberry daiquiri, so if we were out of...
If we were out of ice cream...
What, did he run a tiki bar?
What the fuck?
Just the blender's got one?
You didn't have mixes in the house?
Yeah, we weren't fucking...
I mean, I stole them...
Your family drinks like cowboys, though.
They do.
A real shot in beer vibe.
Neat whiskey.
They do, man.
There was...
We had a bunch of stuff growing up.
All that.
They're just like dark bottles from when my parents got married.
Like, just old shit that...
Yeah.
You know, liqueurs and frangelica and all that kind of shit.
Godiva.
Godiva liqueur.
All that kind of shit.
And that just started systematically getting thinner and thinner as my brother
got old.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like, you steal something, you know?
Amaretto and Dr. Pepper.
Sure.
Woo-wee!
I mean, the only thing that would be...
You know what we called that?
Dr. Pepper.
Okay.
Jesus Christ.
Maybe it was Amaretto and Coke.
Called it Dr. Pepper.
Yeah, we would...
The only thing that got drank proper that would, like, was Niecy wine, which
was at the time
was Pink Sutter Home, White Zinfandel.
Sure.
Which is very popular now.
They call it Rosé, but it's White Zinfandel.
Yeah.
It's trash.
That was the...
Now they have that Rosé Sparkling, which is very big.
Whatever.
Among the jet setters.
Is that who you're...
The Blue Angel pilots?
What are you talking about?
You guys drink beers.
It was beers.
For a while, it was Coors Lights, and then VO for my step-grandfather.
I had to keep VO, and then that switched to SoCo, and he would just do straight
SoCo.
What fraternity was he in?
SoCo.
That's wild.
Traja Alpha Traja.
I can't touch SoCo.
I can't touch SoCo, and I can't touch Canadian Club.
It was like I got messed up on it when I was in eighth grade.
Sure.
And then I remember the...
Parents weren't even going away.
They went away for...
They left on a Sunday for a couple hours, and me and the boys hit the cabinet,
as they say.
That was...
And then I remember a picture just surfaced of me.
Someone sent it to me.
I guess they were going through pictures.
It's me and Pat...
Not you working out, huh?
No.
It was me and Pat drinking Hypnotic and Alizé in the bac