Name: Tim Heidecker Stand Up
Uploaded: 2007-02-14T21:35:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tim Heidecker Stand Up' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2007-02-14. Transcript available. Hey! Check out my latest materials!

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tim Heidecker Stand Up' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2007-02-14. Transcript available. Hey! Check out my latest materials!

Let's be honest, Tim Heidecker, everybody!
Tim Heidecker, everybody wants to get this man apart there, huh?
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
How's everybody doing tonight, huh?
Let me hear ya.
Thanks for having me, Doug, in Denver D&D Joke Center.
It's a great night.
I'm so happy to be here, everybody.
To Valentine's Day is tomorrow, so...
Seriously.
Have we seen...
Has anyone seen here the big snow they're getting out there in New York?
10 feet of snow, come on.
That is a lot of snow for where that is.
But they usually get that kind of snow.
Anyway.
So, how many people here...
I think there's a...
I think there's sort of a defining line between, you know, you're either this
or you're that.
Sort of like you're a Democrat or you're a Republican.
Okay?
You are either a Coca-Cola person or you're a Pepsi guy.
Right?
How many people love Coca-Cola here?
Yeah!
That's what I'm talking about.
I'm Coca-Cola, see.
I love Coca-Cola.
But, you know, it's one of those things where it's a personal preference.
I don't know why.
It's not based on any sort of logic or any sort of facts that I know that you
guys don't know.
I like Coca-Cola.
So, I was thinking about this.
The other day I was over at my manager's house.
And we were watching TV.
And I go into the kitchen to get myself a drink.
And I go in the fridge.
And there's nothing but Pepsi in there.
So, I go, "Mike, I'm in.
You know I'm coming over.
Pick up a six pack of Coke or something.
Just keep it in the fridge.
Because you know I'm going to come over."
The other thing is, when you go to a movie theater.
You go up and you go to the concession stand.
Has anyone ever been there?
The other day I go to see a movie.
And I go to the concession stand.
And the guy goes, the girl behind the, I say, "Can I get a Coke?"
And the girl there says to me.
This bitch behind the counter goes, "Can I?
We only got Pepsi."
So, I go, "Well."
She says, "Is Pepsi okay?"
I can't.
"Is Pepsi okay?"
She says.
And I go, "No.
If I wanted Pepsi, I would've ordered Pepsi."
So.
It's like they should have a sign back there that says,
"Only Pepsi or no Coke or whatever it is."
Anyway.
There's that.
And another one.
Cherry Coke.
I'm...
I got...
First of all, how many people here have even tried a cherry before?
The real cherry.
Right?
First of all, it doesn't taste anything like...
If you drink cherry Coke, it doesn't even taste anything like cherries in the
Coke.
It just really...
Honestly, it tastes like cherry...
It just tastes like sweet Coke.
Sweeter Coke.
So.
Question.
I would...
That's the reason I don't even drink Pepsi.
Because I think Pepsi is too sweet.
So.
Why would I drink...
Why would I even drink...
Cherry...
Perhaps...
Cherry Coke.
You know?
There's a...
I keep putting this in a different pocket.
Cherry Coke.
So.
Like everything else.
There's...
Every other week.
There's a new soda going on.
And then what was this week?
Sierra Mist.
Oh.
Another great soda from Pepsi.
Sierra Mist.
I felt like I was gonna...
I felt like I should've called the plant where they'd make this place and go...
Oh.
I liked your soda when I was seven up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I gotta admit, I do like their commercials.
I think they're...
Pretty funny.
I gotta admit.
Twist my arm.
Good stuff.
Uh.
Good to see some working comedians getting...
Kind of made me think about some commercials that were already out there.
From my childhood.
If anybody remembers these.
Uh.
The one for Coke.
My brand.
I'd like to teach the world to sing.
Remember this one?
Let me hear you.
Perfect harmony.
Ma da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da.
Thank you very much ladies and gentlemen.
Good night.
Thank you.
Tim Heidecker everyone.
Woo!
Thanks a lot.
Tim Heidecker.