Name: 10 John Travolta Jokes
Uploaded: 2013-06-24T18:18:24.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video '10 John Travolta Jokes' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-06-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video '10 John Travolta Jokes' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2013-06-24. Transcript available.

We should say that we found the jokes written on a toilet wall and we thought
they were fucked and it would make a funny opening act. I think we should own
these jokes. Okay, I think we should own them too. You'll be sorry.
Let's do it. They're good jokes, we can agree on that.
You guys ready to start the show? Cool. Well we want to do something different
tonight. We drove here from Austin today and on the car ride down
we found some John Travolta jokes written on this pad of paper and we
found him in a toilet in the bathroom on our way down here and we thought maybe
since Kenny K. Strasser can't make it tonight because he got sick maybe someone
from the crowd wants to come up here and read these jokes be an opening act.
Anyone?
Anyone? No? Maybe that guy in the back over here. Come on up here.
What's your name?
Brandon Foreman, Brandon Foreman. So ladies and gentlemen, Brandon Foreman.
How y'all doing? I'd like to thank y'all for coming out to my first show ever.
I have no idea what I'm doing. So let's find out. All right, let's do some
jokes.
So what disease do John Travolta's?
What disease do John Travolta's?
What? Saturday night fever. What's John Travolta's preferred lubricant when
receiving anal sex from one of his massage therapists?
Grease. Grease.
What do John Travolta's massage therapists call the yellow, brown, and red
found on the massage table after working on John?
What? Primary colors.
What do massage therapists do when they see John Travolta's plane touchdown?
Oh. Where did Kelly Preston start working after discovering her husband's depraved
secret life?
Where?
The whore shack.
After a long night of love, which resulted in the death of his number one
massage therapist, what did John Travolta say to his number two massage
therapist?
Be cool.
All right.
What do you call it when John Travolta and Jerry Sandusky step into the same
elevator?
Two of a kind.
What is the National Association of Massage Therapists currently prepping
against John Travolta?
A civil action.
Why did John Travolta go to Home Depot and buy box cutters?
Why?
Because he was trying to fuck the boy in the plastic bubble.
Why?
Because he was trying to fuck the boy in the plastic bubble.
During the act of sodomy, what did John Travolta say to Gabe Kaplan?
Well, come on my back, Cotter.
What entertainer does John Travolta request during massage sessions?
DJ Doug Brown!
Give it up for Brandon!
How was it?
Pretty good. I had a good time.
I thought it went over pretty well.
Me too.
Thanks for doing this.
Well, you're welcome. Thank you for inviting me.
My name is Tim Heidecker and you're watching Tim's Kitchen Tips.
This is my new cooking show on YouTube where I'm going to show you guys how to
make some very simple recipes.
I'm telling you, this is stuff that you guys are going to be able to do
yourself.