Name: Oscar Special Telethon
Uploaded: 2018-01-17T05:12:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Oscar Special Telethon' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-01-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Oscar Special Telethon' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-01-17. Transcript available.

Oscar Special Telethon

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
We're going to talk about the year of 2017 and the movies in that year.
And we're going to go through the top 100 movies of the year.
We're also going to be asking you to join the Patreon, the On Cinema Patreon,
raising money for the 2018 Oscar special, live Oscar special.
We've been producing this Oscar special now for several years.
Last year was a blip.
It didn't happen because of financial reasons.
This year, we're offering the special live, which will be fully crowdfunded
from you, the On Cinema family.
Become an On Cinema family member now.
All you got to do is go to patreon.com slash On Cinema.
There's an incredible array of options for you.
And let me add that I am joined today, this evening.
I want to welcome all our live listeners from all over the world.
We're having a great time already talking to you about the exciting
opportunities presenting themselves to the On Cinema family.
I'm excited to be joined by one and only one of the great guests we've had on
On Cinema in past years.
And to this day, we'll be, I believe, a part of the On Cinema Oscar special.
I'm talking about Greg Turkington.
Definitely be a part of the special.
Yeah.
And Greg, welcome to the telethon.
And thanks for being here.
And it's exciting to be a part of this.
So this is the first time.
There's a lot of activity.
There's a lot of people that really want to talk about the year of movies,
which has been a terrific year, the 2017 year.
And so we're so excited to be able to bring you the Oscar special this year,
which will be full live coverage starting a half hour before the Oscars start.
And from that point on, we will broadcast live as we've done every year for
many years past.
We will continue to bring you Oscar coverage live as it happens, give you the
scoop.
You can watch the Oscars, but you almost get more information out of the Oscar
special, because not only are we watching it ourselves, we're analyzing it, we
are digesting it, and we're bringing it back to you guys in real time.
I think it's one of the most exciting times of year for us.
It's almost, we call, as you guys know the song, Oscar fever.
You understand the lyric, it's Christmas, it's Christmas for Tinseltown, one of
the great lines from that song.
And that was a song written by me, incidentally.
And there'll be perhaps some song, some version of that song this year, we'll
see.
I want to turn it over to Greg Tarkington now, who joins us in the studio, who
has a lot to say tonight.
We are going to kick things off.
Greg, how important is the Oscar special to you, and how important is it for
you, for the audience, to become a member of the On Cinema family?
The floor is yours.
Well, I'll say this much, that if you're watching the Oscars without this on
your secondary screen, you're essentially...
Hold on.
Okay, thank you.
All right, start over, Greg.
Thank you.
If you're trying to watch the Oscars and you don't have this thing going, too,
you're missing out on 95% of the information and expertise.
I would say it's comparable with trying to watch the Super Bowl, if all the
players didn't have numbers on their jerseys,
and no one was talking and telling you what was going on, and you just saw
people all in the same colored shirt running around,
and you had no way of knowing who'd scored, no way of knowing how many minutes
were left in the game, or anything like that.
Watching the Oscars, it's without the On Cinema Oscar special, it's like
watching the Oscars with a blindfold on and earplugs in, like Helen Keller.
Great.
Well, thank you so much for that.
We're going to just spread the word that this is happening at the moment, and
we're letting all the different platforms know that the special is now.
We've got 470 people joining us live.
That's exciting.
We're going to try something out.
We're going to take a call, if that's all right with you, Greg.
I don't want to take calls, because we've got 100 movies to review tonight.
Yes.
Well, let's take a call.
This is kind of Christmas for me, because all year long, I'm saying we need to
review more movies and have less of this other.
I'm going to take a call, and then we're going to get into the first.
Yeah, but I'd like to review the movie.
Aaron, are you there?
Well, I don't.
Aaron, are you there?
This may not work.
Hello?
That's fine.
It may not work.
Hello?
Hello?
I hope it doesn't work, because I don't remember.
Oh, I understand.
That's fine.
It may not work.
Hello?
Aaron?
Go away, Aaron.
Fair enough.
Hey, Jackson, are you there?
Oh, I know what's going on.
Hold on.
All right, Aaron, are you there?
Yeah, can you hear me?
Yes, Aaron, how are you tonight, and welcome to the On Cinema Oscar Special Telethon.
Well, thanks, Tim.
How are you?
Greg?
We're good, but how much are you going to donate?
Well, thanks, Tim.
Thanks, Greg.
I have a...
What's up?
All right, thanks for the call, and we'll begin our first movie tonight.
This is number 100.
We're going to go through the top 100 movies of the year.
Life, starring, directed by Daniel Espinoza, starring Jack Gyllenhaal.
I'm sorry, Jake Gyllenhaal.
Two A's.
Rebecca Ferguson, and Ryan Reynolds, and Hiyokoromo Hiroyuki Sanada.
That's a Spanish, or Japanese, Japanese name.
Anyways, we are excited to...
So that's life.
That's life.
Sort of the old, one of those old sayings from Sinatra.
And it is sort of almost like an homage to Sinatra life.
It's a...
Let me read the description.
A team of scientists aboard...
Okay.
The initial...
An international space station discovered rapidly evolving life form.
That's a sci-fi movie.
So your views on life...
This is number 100 out of 100 movies.
They're our favorite 100 movies this year.
Your opinion on that movie, Life, Greg.
When I walked out of the theater after seeing Life this year,
I turned to the guy, the ticket taker, as I was walking out the door.
And he said, how is a movie?
And I said, it's a wonderful life.
And he got a kick out of that.
That was a reference, of course, to It's a Wonderful Life.
He got a kick out of that.
From 1946, Frank Capra and Jimmy Stewart.
But this is a very different movie than It's a Wonderful Life.
If you liked It's a Wonderful Life, I wouldn't say don't watch this.
Because if you liked that, you're probably a movie buff.
And this is definitely a movie buffs type of film.
Okay.
Yes.
Well, let's go to number 99.
I would give it Five Bags of Popcorn.
Okay.
Five Bags of Popcorn.
Can we please turn Greg's mic up, we are being told.
Let's try...
Okay.
Go ahead, Greg.
Talk.
It's a Wonderful Life.
Okay.
And how about my mic?
It's a Wonderful Mic would be a funny movie, too.
Okay.
That sounds great.
We are asking...
People are saying get close to the mic, Greg.
So I think that's going to be a better experience.
This is terrific.
Well, it gets number 99.
So Life is...
It's a Wonderful Life, I guess, is the takeaway from that.
And it is a wonderful movie.
And it is a five-bag movie for sure.
Yes.
We're only coming in on...
And it's not a Bugs Life.
It's just plain old life.
That's life as it is.
Hold on.
Greg, you talk about...
If you can...
I'm going to do a little audio adjustment.
If you could talk about The Fate of the Furious.
That's number 90...
Oh, I'm sorry.
Number 99, Breathe.
Breathe.
And that's starring Andy Serkis.
The great Andy Serkis.
Mm-hmm.
Well, you know, Andy Serkis actually was the director of the film, Tim.
But it does star Andrew Garfield, Claire Foy, Hugh Bonneville, and Ed Sbleers.
And it's the inspiring true love story of Robin and Diana Cavendish.
If you don't know already, they were an adventurous couple who refused to...
Who's to give up in the face of a devastating disease?
And so this is kind of the way we were for this generation, I guess.
A sad, sad movie, really, about disease.
And if you saw the way we were with Barbara Streisand and Robert Redford, I
guess you could
say Andrew Garfield and Claire Foy are 2017's Redford and Streisand in terms of
a tear-jerking
couple facing horrible odds.
Right, listen, just a note about the audio, if you're experiencing any trouble,
this is broadcast in mono, so we are only activating one channel, and that's
something you're going to have to live with.
I encourage you at this point right now...
And not Dolby Sound or THX 1138, George Lucas.
Yes, that's right.
If you want to just put one of your ears out, that's terrific.
Or do a mono mix, if you want to mix everything down into a mono.
This is meant to be a mono mix.
Well, movie reviews don't need to be in stereo.
As long as they're accurate, I think people are pretty satisfied.
And join Patreon today, what we're going to do is monitor the growth of Patreon's
OnCinema page, the OnCinema family.
You can see our empty five bags up there on the screen, and it's a little sad,
isn't it?
We want to start adding to that.
And so what we'll do is we will just be monitoring right now, if we can go on
the Patreon page,
we can see that we have currently 395, that's 395 Patreons.
And now that changes as the month goes, because people sign up for a big cash
payment, and then they drop out.
So we're looking tonight, I think, to hit 500.
I think tonight we have to hit 500.
I know a way to do it.
So get on to...
I know a way to do it.
Go ahead.
If you can agree right here, promise and shake on it,
to allow me to finish the series of segments I was doing of Oh God locations,
so we can get into Oh God 2 and Oh God 3 more substantially than we did,
if you can agree on air to let me finish that series of segments next season on
OnCinema,
I think you're going to see quite a few donations coming in, because that's the
main thing people ask me about.
All right.
Do I have your commitment?
I will agree to that.
Let's move things along and talk to Ava.
Ava, are you there?
Ava Gardner.
Ava Gardner.
She did, and she's deceased.
How about we talk to August.
August.
I know August wants to chime in.
Yeah, hey.
Hey, how's it going?
Hey, I'm fine.
How are you?
Do you have any questions about the year in movies?
I have a question for you.
Were you named after August Osage County, starring Meryl Streep from 2013?
I'm sorry, Greg.
I can't hear you.
Were you named after the movie August Osage County?
Yeah, I was.
I probably was, yeah.
Okay, and your question, August?
Yeah, did you guys see The Snowman?
Yes.
You know, the one with...
Yeah, what did you think?
I loved it.
I thought it was a great movie, Greg.
Which snowman?
Because there are actually several snowmans.
There was...
The one with Michael Fassbender and, you know,
Val Kilmer.
Because there was one in 2014, you know, as well.
I'm really happy for Val Kilmer.
He lost some weight, I think.
Well, that was probably for the film.
He really looks good, you know?
Well, he had lost weight when he was in The Doors.
August, what...
Oliver Stone.
But then in the movie The Doors,
he gained the weight at the end, and that's why...
I'm really sorry.
I can't hear Greg.
That's okay.
I have a question for you, August.
What membership level are you at for the Patreon On Cinema family right now?
Tim, I gotta admit, I'm a Chapo boy, but I'm not an On Cinema boy yet.
You need to sign up right now.
I need you to go to oncinema.com...
I'm sorry, patreon.com slash oncinema.
Start at the lowest level you can afford.
Five dollars.
Or don't watch the On Cinema Oscar special.
You don't have access to it.
You understand?
I'm sorry.
Tim, Tim, listen to me.
I don't have access to a fund, you know?
You got the entire...
Get out of here.
I don't want to talk to that guy anymore.
He's a loser.
We got to clean up our airwaves of these people.
Greg, I want to talk to you about one of my favorite movies of the year, number
98,
The Fate of the Furious.
And the Fate of the Fast and the Furious franchise was in jeopardy after the
death of the leading man.
Paul Driver.
Paul Driver.
But the fate of The Fast and the Furious was to make a movie called The Fate of
the Furious.
And this was a situation that ended up with a happy 