Name: Trump Administration Puns
Uploaded: 2019-03-14T18:26:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Trump Administration Puns' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-03-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Trump Administration Puns' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-03-14. Transcript available.

By the way, I've been so nuts right now, I wanted to say Doug and Miles and Vic,
I have a challenge for us.
These are Trump administration puns.
And I will begin, okay?
Okay, give us one, give us one.
I'll begin just to set the...
Give us a direction.
You know what I said to my son?
I came home and he had taken the couch and he had put pillows and the cushions
and sheets and had made this structure with it.
I said, man, a fort.
Man, a fort.
Oh, right.
Man, a fort.
Sure.
Right?
And you know, as far as Donald Trump goes, I say, you know, he's such a huckster.
He's such a, you know, criminal fraudster.
I say con away.
Really?
Con away if you want to.
I was running through this field.
Just con away.
Come on, don't stop on my account.
I was running through a field of flowers the other day and I said, huck, a bee.
Huck?
Is that an expression?
Huck, a bee.
Well, he doesn't like cursing.
Oh, heck, a bee.
Yeah, he doesn't like cursing.
Tim, did I tell you about my plastic surgery I got recently?
No.
I didn't tell you about my new chin?
My new chin.
My new chin.
My new chin.
That's excellent.
My son was like, what is that with the four wheels and the windshield and
everything?
I said, that's a car, son.
You know how he, well, some of his own kids are in his administration.
I didn't know that.
He refers to his daughters as my trumps, my trumps, my sexy lady trumps.
What?
I just wanted to kill it.
I just wanted to kill it.
That was fine.
Because it's like, we don't do anti-comedy on the show.
It's just, it's straight fun.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Yeah, you're right.
Yeah, come on.
Let's keep it real.
Final warning.
God damn it.
Everybody else has been, has resigned.
There's no other, there's no other administration members to talk about.
Yeah.
Mnuchin, I think.
Mnuchin was great.
Really.
How do you come up with that stuff?
Trump administration.
My trumps, my trumps, my sexy lady.
I've been trying to think of a George Papadopoulos one since we started.
I got nothing.
Okay.
Well, thanks for participating.
Papadopoulos is really hard to fit in.
You've been a lot of fun, caller.
Tim, have you seen Voss?
I'll lay down some money that you have.
See what?
I bet that you see DeVos.
Betsy DeVos.
I tried.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
Who do I work for?
Of course I work for DeVos.
DeVos.
DeVos.
DeVos.
The German guy.
DeVos.
I work for DeVos.
Oh, DeVos is here.
Clean up your work.
Mind your piece and cues, everyone.
Clean up your work.
DeVos is here.
All right.
Great.
So, yeah.
Thanks for...
I got one that's not good, but, you know...
You all right?
Yeah, I just want to look up some administration.
Oh, that's potentially cheating.
Is it?
No, it's not.
It's fine.
It's sanctioned.
I was...
I know what Doug's doing.
He's furiously looking up administration members.
Their names aren't great.
They're...
It's, you know...
I've been killing with it.
What am I going to do with William Barr, you know?
I just raised the bar on that one.
I'm concerned because, you know, I'm a...
I've heard of getting a bill at the bar, but not a bill bar.
After a round of drinks.
I love going out in the canoe.
I love going out in the canoe, as you guys know.
I go out to the lake.
I go out to the...
I use my canoe all the time.
But I have to say, I have to say that what I use to move has become a little
rough.
So I feel like I might need to sand oars.
Sanders.
Sanders.
Sand oars.
Ah.
Sand oars.
Sand oars.
Sand oars.
When I was in England, I was trying to buy some gumballs.
Yeah.
And there was a little machine there, but I couldn't because I couldn't find
Mike Pence.
Mike Pence.
I was looking all through my pockets, and I couldn't find Mike Pence.
Your Pence.
I was trying to sell my car the other day, and somebody asked me.
I've been so bored, you might end up banning me from office hours.
Oh, no.
Oh.
Hey, coming in.
Coming in.
Nice work, baby.
Coming in lukewarm.
Thanks.
And they said, how much do you want for your car?
And I said, that's going to cost a...
That doesn't work.
Acosta?
Acosta.
It works.
Does it work?
Technically.
If sand oars work, then that works just fine.
Sand oars.
All right.
Eric, did you have a question or anything you wanted to bring up?
A question for AD Miles?
Tim, when I was washing my car...
Who was washing it?
I was washing it.
Who was washing it?
Well, I got it all soaked up, right?
And I have one of these hybrid Toyotas.
And then after I soaked it up, I rinsed my Prius.
I had to rinse your Prius.
You rinsed your Prius?
Uh-huh.
Sorry, I was chewing on food when I said that.
But I had to rinse Prius.
You rinsed your Prius.
I rinsed my Prius.
What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.
What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.
What's the buzz?
Tell me what's happening.