Name: OFFICE HOURS LIVE (3/19/2020) with Vera Drew, John C. Reilly and Fred Armisen
Uploaded: 2020-03-19T18:32:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'OFFICE HOURS LIVE (3/19/2020) with Vera Drew, John C. Reilly and Fred Armisen' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-03-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'OFFICE HOURS LIVE (3/19/2020) with Vera Drew, John C. Reilly and Fred Armisen' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-03-19. Transcript available.

OFFICE HOURS LIVE (3/19/2020) with Vera Drew, John C. Reilly and Fred Armisen

- You're not to blame!
- I like having fun, I like to laugh.
I love people who can make me laugh.
I like having fun, I like to laugh.
Like having fun, people who laugh.
Okay!
We're wigging out!
All right, calm down.
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Woman!
Uncle!
Good morning!
Good morning, world!
It's Tim Heidecker.
It is Office Hours Live!
Starring Tim Heidecker, Doug Lusenhoff, Vic Berger, and Aristotle's back there
running the video,
making sure we get out there loud and clear.
We've got Matt Carlin back at his homestead, self-quarantining.
We are here in the flesh, trying to keep a safe distance.
We, I'm wearing the gloves.
I've got...
That's gotta be, um...
Oh, I know what it is!
It's my computer!
Hold on!
Because my...
Doo-doo-doo!
So many people...
That was spooky!
That was like a ghost.
I think I'm...
Oh no, I guess I am on it.
Tim, your music is still going.
Oh, wow.
No, that's...
That's Vic's music.
Okay.
I forgot to...
That was me this time.
I forgot I was doing that.
Vic, are you...
Mic check!
Mic check!
Vic Berger, mic check!
It is so loud.
Like, my ears are bleeding.
Well, there's something going on on your end that you can't...
No, let's just connect it from me, though.
I don't know.
My...
I don't know.
What is...
Right there?
Uh...
Let me get that.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
What is...
Right there?
Uh...
I...
Let me try it again.
Better, better?
A little better.
Yeah, just down a little bit more.
Yeah!
All right.
Listen, folks.
We are live.
And...
We're at Doug's house again.
We're...
Trying to come down from the old 9 to 5 last week.
Chicken quiet!
Thank you very much for all that.
I'm wearing these gloves out of...
You know...
Protection for myself and for my friends.
Honestly.
Uh...
Why don't we show the room a little bit?
Uh...
What's it like being the coolest guy in town?
Show...
Vic...
How's the sound out there, I guess?
It's pretty loud, but it's...
It's pretty loud.
It's gonna be...
Well, everyone says you're too low, so I'll turn you up.
Okay, turn me up.
Turn it up.
You sound fine, okay?
Everybody sounds fine.
We always do this.
And one of the dreams I have, one of the visions I have for the show is that we
will get to a place where we don't spend the first five minutes of the show
talking about how the things sound.
You don't listen to the radio.
Imagine turning on, uh...
Cape...
You know, NPR or something, and Latch Me Sing or, uh...
Doug, help me out here.
Uh...
Steve Inskeep.
Steve Inskeep spends...
This is NPR.
The time is five o'clock Eastern.
Kai Risdahl.
These are your top headlines.
But before we give you our top headlines, how do we sound?
Can we get some feedback from the audience out there?
Tim, you know what would be cool?
What?
You know what would be the ultimate?
We had Butch Vig back here running our boards.
That would be neat.
Or, uh...
Steve Albini.
Steve Albini.
Maybe Glynn Johns.
Or Sir, um...
Your guy.
George Martin's dead.
Uh...
How about Sir George Martin?
Giles.
Giles.
Giles Martin.
Geoff Lynn!
Geoff Lynn's team.
Did you see that video of Geoff Lynn?
There's a documentary about it.
Have you seen that, Vic?
You must have seen it.
No, I haven't.
Mr. Blue Sky.
And, um, it's pretty neat because he has got his whole big old giant house set
up like a recording studio.
Like, and it's this big old mansion in Beverly Hills or something.
Like a recording studio?
Well, every room is equipped to be recorded in.
So he's got plugs and, uh, he's got outlets.
Turn it up.
He's got like quarter inch cables in the wall socket.
He's got eighth inch.
He's got, uh, he's got like in the wall, you can plug in XLRs and go to the
main board.
It's pretty neat.
And he's got microphones.
He's just waiting to be inspired at any time of the day and he could be like.
But he's been, but he went back and he re-recorded all his old, all his old
songs.
Oh, that was necessary.
It actually.
Well, no, it's true.
It was because he, well, not, not just sonically, but business wise.
It like, um, it changes the publishing deals that he has.
So he, it like re re ups the publishing deals.
You can't really tell that they're like re recorded.
Cause he's just like such a master.
I know he's such a master.
They're identical sounding recordings.
Doug.
Yeah.
What is that?
Smart.
Why couldn't he just take the one and just, just EQ it a little bit.
Be like, I redid it.
Give me that.
Cause it's technically a re recording and it's just like, he's covering himself
essentially.
So.
Okay.
That's what I know.
I've heard bands that I've heard bands that do that.
Is this now?
Is this how you talk now?
I have bands.
Wait, something just changed.
I said, I heard bands.
Something.
I've heard albums that they re recorded and they sound really so different that
they suck.
I see.
This thing is fucked.
My, my, uh, eighth inch to, from my laptop is touchy.
Do you, do you need, is it RCA?
It's good.
I just had to diddle it a little bit.
Listen, it is good to see you guys.
It is good to be back on the air.
We have a, I love you guys too.
I really do.
We have, we are wigging out today.
By the way, we are wigging out.
It was an idea.
Let me just back up.
It was an idea.
I had pretty much, I, you know, alone.
Solo is up in my daughter's playroom.
I found this, I found her, some of her wigs.
Some of the family wigs.
I think that's really cool.
And I said, this is.
Family wigs?
We have a family wig box.
And I said, here's it.
Before I finish this great story.
I just want to let you know that the phones will be open shortly.
We're still doing, there's a technical issue there as always, but we are
working on that.
We're going to simply, sorry about that.
Maybe five minutes or so, the phone, the calls, the phones will be open
hopefully.
But there is so much to talk about.
And I also, I said yesterday on Twitter, I want to make this about the calls.
So it's ironic that we don't have that working right now.
It's a simple matter.
Everyone has a story.
Of my side laptop, my side piece.
My Goomba.
What's that called?
A Goomba?
The laptop I don't use.
How do we get in porn?
Can you just calm down?
Here's what Doug's doing.
Doug's doing an inventory.
I'm testing my mind.
Yeah, you're doing an inventory of your drops.
Yeah.
Which is bumming me out.
Because I'm trying to get a flow going.
You're talking about laptops and family wigs.
It's like, we need more.
That's what the audience needs to hear.
You are literally just listening to what you've got.
And the whole reason we have all these, these plugs and mixers and everything
is so that you could do that in the privacy of your own headphones.
No, I was playing those as content, not as.
No, you're not.
You are going through.
Oh, I got this one.
Got to remember to play this one.
No, I'm not.
I'm just playing funny sounds in the back.
You have no.
You're not listening to the show.
I'm seasoning your story.
You're not.
They're not related to the show.
People are unrelated.
What are you doing now, Vic?
Do you want me to smack you around too?
Non sequiturs is what they want.
What's that on your head?
It's a wig song.
So what's that on your head?
Now that's.
See that?
That's why Vic will always be my favorite son.
I'm a little more abstract than that.
You know, that's just not how I work.
It's fine.
I don't want to be number one.
I just want to be, you know, I'm not for everybody.
I just noticed your variety hat.
Jesus Christ.
I'm also wearing a sport coat because of my my I was so embarrassed by my your
pit stains last week.
You really think you're not going to sweat through that?
I will, but you're not going to see it.
I mean, you're not going to eat out.
I also adjusted the.
How does the camera angle looks better?
It's just a better show.
It's the lighting is good.
I think what's going to happen is we're going to.
By the way, if you're listening to the podcast, thank you for supporting the
podcast.
What a terrific opportunity it's been to be able to provide that service.
But we're talking about wigs and what we're wearing.
And it's good.
It's here.
There's nothing.
There's no.
Who cares what we're wearing for the listener?
Caller.
How does it sound to people?
Everyone's happy.
OK, very loud.
It's still very loud.
Listen, shut up.
Shut up.
It's bothering me.
Just take one ear out.
Well, you know, you can turn.
You're coming out of your mixer, right?
I can't talk about this anymore.
There's more important things going on.
Calm down.
Matt Carlin is listening.
He's at home.
It's OK.
Ask him.
Text him.
Matt, is it OK?
Jesus.
I'm at Doug's house.
I'm where you look at this.
Everybody just cool.
I'm using this Pee Wee Herman mug.
Jesus, Gandhi.
Did that one fit in with.
So let's talk about this.
Let's talk.
Just get this out of the way.
So because we don't want to talk about the list.
You better have some Jesus on tap then.
I also think what's going to happen is you're the the effect that you have
going on.
It's it's it's already peaking in terms of like overuse.
You know, like this whatever delay that's on.
I got a little reverb on there.
But it's getting big.
Scott, I'm too.
I got it.
It's old.
It's getting so old and dated and tired from a comedic place.
Why don't you ask the office hour coworkers and see what they think?
What do you think?
You guys are going to start ganging up on me.
Well, no.
It'll be in the comments, you know, and you can you can make it up and say you
can.
Main mix is a little low according to Matt.
So I don't know how to adjust that.
So everyone can just turn their volume up.
It's a little low.
Maybe it's because it's coming out of your shit speakers.
Why don't you get some black points boot?
I don't know where the main out is on this.
What's up, everybody?
Shabbat Shalom.
What is that?
Get him out of here.
What is the main out?
Is it my mixer?
Main audio?
What is the main out?
I know what it is.
Hold on.
I can figure this out.
It's this.
It's got to be the main out.
Well, I'm out.
How's that?
Let's say I'm sweating in this mouth.
I'm sweating in this fucking wig.
I'm fucking in and you're fucking out.
I don't know.
I've got I've got the main out like pretty loud here.
So I don't know what's going on.
Are you kidding?
I wish.
See, no, I'm too loud.
I wish somebody would just step up to the plate
and fix this problem once and for all.
You know, how's that working out for you?
Nobody's interested in doing that.
Nobody wants to take that initiative.
It's like the Trump administration.
Nobody actually wants to do they want to come out and do their speech.
Here.
Here I go.
Just give Doug's address out and just have somebody come over.
You know, there's a thousand kids that are that are, you know,
just to come out graduated from some New York.
The New York Recording Academy or whatever.
Film Academy.
This is what's going out to this to the right.
Oh, now they're getting up.
Now they're scurrying around.
What do you want me to do?
I have no idea.
I don't know.
I need you to come in and say, here's the deal, Jack.
We need Joe Biden.
Control.
It's going to be just fine.
Okay.
I'm also going to try not to touch my face.
Now I got these gloves on.
You know, I'm not I'm not doing that as much.
I'm not pulling on my neck.
My my what do you call it?
The turkey.
That's the what we want, right?
Okay.
I need you to get back on phones.
You're not you're not going to solve this.
People are just going to deal with it.
I like food.
Someone said I'm the worst friend ever.
I'm just trying to I'm I can't be all huggy huggy.
What's it called?
Lovey dovey and huggy.
I can't be touch.
I'm like a tiger.
I'm a tiger mom with you to a tiger mom.
You know what that is?
No, that's just using more.
This is tough love.
I got to smack you around a little bit.
You hear me?
Robert W understands that old school now is old school.
That's a pile of bullshit.
All right.
We are standing by for phones.
Let's talk quickly about the Gal Gadot video that came out last.
I think Doug