Name: OFFICE HOURS LIVE (4/9/2020) with VP Joe Biden and of Montreal
Uploaded: 2020-04-09T19:25:41.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'OFFICE HOURS LIVE (4/9/2020) with VP Joe Biden and of Montreal' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-04-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'OFFICE HOURS LIVE (4/9/2020) with VP Joe Biden and of Montreal' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-04-09. Transcript available.

OFFICE HOURS LIVE (4/9/2020) with VP Joe Biden and of Montreal

I'm a man. I'm not an ape. I'm a real person.
Paused.
It is very low.
That's the stream from before.
I'm still low.
Okay, so Vic says it's low.
Matt says it's high.
Audience says it's low.
On the playback?
Yeah.
I've now put us to max.
Okay.
Hello, or what was it?
Sorry.
Before it was going out, it was nominal.
Okay.
We're now pumping pretty hard.
Yeah.
Okay.
Just send me a link to where we're at.
You can send to the standard flash drive, and that'll tell me to text it.
Oh, yeah, we're live.
That screen just went fucked.
I can do it.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
I'm going to get some music playing.
The sound is so much better.
Great.
Hey, wake up.
All right, folks.
The show is about to begin.
And what does that sound?
Oh, that might be this cool music.
Are you ready?
Dougie, are you ready?
Yes, sir.
Are we going?
Hold on, hold on.
Hold on.
Did you tweet out the link or anything?
Hell yeah.
We need to just get up and get more peeps.
Are you back?
I know what I'm going to do.
Everybody tell their friends who are watching,
it's time for the show to begin.
It's time for the show to begin.
It's time for the show to begin.
It's time for the show to begin.
I said, it's time for the show to begin.
I said, it's time for the show to begin.
I said, it's time for the show to begin.
We want to start the show.
Start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
Come on, Doug.
Give it to me.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
We're going to start the show.
Come on, Doug.
Give it to me hard.
Let's go live video.
Come on.
Give it to me in 10.
9.
Come on, 8.
Come on, 7.
Come on, 6.
Come on, 5.
Come on, 4.
3, 2, 1.
Say, 4.
3, 2, 1.
Say, 4.
3, 2, 1.
Say, 4.
3, 2, 1.
Say, 1.
2, 3, 4.
5, 6, 7, 8.
1, 2, 3, 4.
5, 6, 7, 8.
1, 2, 3, 4.
5, 6, 7, 8.
1, 2, 3, 4.
5, 6, 7, 8.
Go.
Go.
Go.
Go.
Go.
You got to take your music.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I'm going to start the show.
I just wanted to show that I am wearing suit pants, too.
I'm not just wearing.
Sit back and relax.
Sit back and relax.
Enjoy yourselves a cup of Three Stooges coffee
and enjoy the show.
Okay.
What a way to begin.
Sorry for the late start, everybody.
We are going to catch my breath.
Oh, my God.
Coming in hot, ladies and gentlemen.
Me, me, me.
Me, me.
Coming in hot.
I got to catch my breath.
I'm super anxious right now.
That's just like a lot to handle.
Doug, I got.
Let me ask you a question.
How are you doing?
I'm doing great, Tim.
I'm loving this quar.
Loving the what?
The quar.
The quar.
The quar-ing.
You know that band Guar?
They should do quar.
Why don't they jump on that?
I don't know.
They already got the mask on, too.
Yeah, they're ready to go.
What about you, Vic?
How are you holding up?
Not so great to be honest.
Not as good.
I am stressing out about it all.
Yeah.
A lot going on.
Well, you and me have it a little harder than Doug,
who's living on Easy Street.
Right.
He's just chilling out.
He's got no dependents.
Right.
Well, I got rid of my kids.
Yeah.
That's why.
When they're about three, I had to...
I said, nah, enough's enough.
All right.
Ship 'em off.
Let us begin our beautiful show.
It is office hours.
It is Thursday.
The date today is April 9th.
And we are in our Sunday best.
We are always trying to innovate and come up with interesting ways of doing the
show.
And I said, what if we just...
Easter is coming.
Obviously, we're excited.
Easter is around the corner on Sunday.
And I thought you were going to play that clip of Trump saying...
Oh, yeah.
How much he loves Easter.
Easter is here.
We're in our Easter Sunday best.
Sunday best, everybody.
We ask you to dress up as well.
Phil is dressed up.
I can see him in the Zoom.
Uncle Phil is here.
Easter is a very special day for many reasons.
We are going to...
Should I...
I should turn this to you.
You better have some Jesus on tap then.
Wow.
We'll get into this scene.
You better have some Jesus on tap.
A couple of orders of business before we get to your calls.
We've got...
Jesus is so far.
The Patreon...
Let me look at the Patreon.
I don't want to dwell on this too long because it is business.
And this is a fun, fun show.
But if we go to Patreon...
Nobody fucks with their Jesus.
Log in.
And we just monitor the numbers here.
We are...
We just...
We just capped $5,000 a month, right?
And we just...
Not capped.
We just hit over.
We just went over the line for $5,000 a month with 1,154 patrons.
Thank you, Jesus.
The patrons exploded in the past few weeks.
She'll be in the bathroom.
Jesus, Condi.
We've got 285 new patrons in the past.
How does this work, Matt?
The...
It says, yay, 285 new patrons.
What is that?
From when?
I don't know.
From this past 48 hours?
What is the time?
I'm talking about Autumn, Michael, Lee, Bozo.
Bozo's a new member.
Thank you, Bozo, for joining.
The exclusive Patreon, of course, gives you access to the after hours, half
hour of more nonsense from me an