Name: Best of Season Four feat. Fred Armisen, John C. Reilly, Jack Black - OFFICE HOURS LIVE (5/21/20)
Uploaded: 2020-05-21T17:00:13.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Best of Season Four feat. Fred Armisen, John C. Reilly, Jack Black - OFFICE HOURS LIVE (5/21/20)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Best of Season Four feat. Fred Armisen, John C. Reilly, Jack Black - OFFICE HOURS LIVE (5/21/20)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-21. Transcript available.

Best of Season Four feat. Fred Armisen, John C. Reilly, Jack Black - OFFICE HOURS LIVE (5/21/20)

Hi everybody, it's Tim Heidecker here. This is a proof that this is me. I have
this old picture
of me. I want to welcome you to our Best of Season 4 compilation we put
together.
This starts in March, March 13th, our big 100th episode 8-hour marathon, and it
continues all
the way up until the WOHL experience. We are doing some much-needed renovations
here at the
new Office Hours studio, adding in some new lights and some cameras and a new
flow.
So enjoy these handcrafted pics from producer Matt. We enjoy doing the show. We
can't wait to be back
live next week uh sefefefefefe hi start the show start the show say one two
three four five six seven
eight one two three four five six seven eight
i have tim in michigan yeah how you doing oh yes tim hey how's it going tim um
you are
one of me yeah i can hear you all right you thank you for calling in uh my
producer tells me that you
are uh you are out there protesting the um the stay-at-home orders that your
governor has put
in place is that correct uh i was not currently i'm not but i was yes currently
i'm not though
okay i understand that where what's your point of view on this i think it's
kind of interesting i've
i've because of the new call-in system we haven't been able to talk to sort of
the other side quote
unquote where are you coming from i mean what you don't trust do you believe
that there's a danger
with the the virus out there like what's your what's your pitch on why things
should go back to normal so
quickly well well certainly things are definitely getting blown out of
proportion and there is there
is things that that people need and people want people want like what like what
like what well there's
all sorts of stuff for different people different people like easy okay calm
down tim just like what
name one name one thing personally or just widely personally for me i enjoy uh
uh to be prepared for
something things that are important to me okay like what like what like uh uh
like you know birthdays or
you know holidays special like a special holiday that's important to me one
that's uh not everyone's
favorite because there's no gifts god forbid yeah but which one you felt so let
me ask you what like so you
felt passionate enough to go out there and you were you were protesting in
front of the capital like
why can't you just chill out and uh let this thing pass
i'm worried if i let this thing pass my life you know i'm gonna i'm gonna miss
out on some of my
favorite times of the year the scariest the scary seasons the seasons that are
the seasons where the
smells change you know what i'm saying the fall you're talking about autumn
like are you talking about
are you worried about uh missing out on halloween is that what i'm getting i'm
very worried about it yes
very worried about it okay i'm worried about not being prepared i do i do a
massive massive haunted house out in
front of my home and if and if it's not yeah exactly yeah so you're worried you're
this is uh kind of
quite personal for you you're looking ahead to the end of october worried that
your halloween haunted
house is going to get cancelled because of what's going on right now well not
cancel i have enough stuff
now to do it but uh not on the level that i want what can i ask uh what happens
in that haunted house
like what do you got in there bowls and noodles that are guts balls and noodles
that are guts that you
close your eyes in their guts well you must be able to find bowls of noodles
well you can't you can't
what about this what about just sort of like taking one for the team and having
a little
like the concept of sacrifice and the concept of like maybe just chill on this
you know hopefully by
this by you know september the restrictions can be lifted a little bit so you
can focus on just seems
like you're jumping the gun on this getting all upset about that's what i'm
saying this is when i start
this is the exact time when i start and this is completely effing me i'm gonna
be so behind by the
time i i'm not getting the jump i'm not getting the jump on this and there's
about 10 other guys i
fight with uh to get for supplies what on halloween on your haunted house
supplies there's about 10 other
guys that like it as much as i do and we're fighting about supplies did you
have six months wait yeah dude
it's not even may and you you're already starting to get your supplies in for
your haunted house
this is when they start putting out the bargain bin stuff in the stuff that'll
just fly off the shelf
okay calm down calm down so all right so whatever you just roll with it and
maybe you pay a little extra
for or you just scale down your haunted house man
first of all b is not an option i ain't scaling down crap people look forward
to this and the
smiles and the scares on people's faces are what keep me going throughout the
year i'll die
you'll die that's it you'll die period if you don't do your haunted house i don't
get if i don't get to
see the faces i will die yes oh my god are you doing anything right now to
protect yourself like i mean
because you were out protesting like are you wearing you know prevented masks
all that kind of stuff or
yeah i am wearing a wolf mask just because i enjoy it so you have a wolf mask
okay so but the mouth is
open the mouth's open well i have a question like i have a question so this is
don't you have stuff from
last year like what do you do with all your halloween supplies from last year i
mean i have i have a lot
of stuff but once it's used in the haunted house it's now personal use
what great ass once i use it in the house it then becomes personal use okay
i don't understand so they can't be used in the haunted so you so you do a
haunted house every year
and everything that's used in that haunted house be uh is sort of discontinued
after that okay well
not discontinued it becomes personal use for me you know what i'm saying no so
i'm just trying to
paint a picture here you've got like cobwebs and scary skeletons and stuff that
you use and then that
once it's used once it's used it gets then put into a box and it can only be
used for personal use
right exactly and there is days that i'll pop around in the basement and i'll
open the boxes and
and have memories or take it out there's there's stuff in there i forget how
scary it is and
and it's just nice to see then it becomes personal use and that is to be honest
with you that is a
benefit for me so how many years i'm just trying how many years have you been
doing this haunted house
i've all this is going to just be my second year okay oh so so you have one you
have one year supply
you have one year supply in your basement of haunted house materials that are
now have now been
discontinued and can only be used for personal use exactly yes i'm boned this
year yeah
well i mean let me just i have a question no i just okay i have a suggestion
then you can ask the
question mine's a suggestion too it could be the same thing why don't you just
uh waive your personal
use rule that you've created and reuse last year's halloween crap i mean you
know what i mean that would
kill me i would kill you i would die i would i would die you would die i can't
do that that's not personal
use i put that out there people start walking through it's i've seen this i've
seen this right
what's scary you know what's the definition of scary something you've never
seen surprise yeah i hear you
surprise exactly but i mean i think like 80 can be just skeletons and gravestones
and whatever cobwebs
surprise let me ask you a pointed question answer honestly what would happen if
you skipped this year
i'm um this is not exaggerating this is not trying to get sympathy this is not
trying to get people to
go fund me or whatever for me uh but i think i might i think i might kill them
oh no jesus christ
yeah that's not a threat that's nothing i just think that's what that's what
that's the fact right
that's the yeah that's the honest fact if uh this is i don't know if this is
important to me guys
i hear you well so what what do you what's your what what do you hope to
achieve through your
advocacy here are you hoping that the governor reclassifies halloween stores as
essential services
or something or uh any holiday store sure but just that's for other people but
if if they could open up
halloween stores all around and if they could maybe open up party cities who
often have nice stuff
yeah i would feel yeah i can also buy a lot online which i am doing which helps
wait wait wait so you're buying on amazon or whatever
and that's not covering up for what the dis like it feels like you've got
things covered if it feels
like it's gonna be okay here's the problem i don't know i can't tell the size
of these things on the
internet so a lot of these things they're showing up and they're massive or or
they're puny and i'm
like and i got no like there's gonna be no scale on this thing because i can't
tell the size on the
internet okay you should be able to do a more in there should be a more info
tab on amazon you can see
the dimensions that's my recommendation no they put it they hold it in a hand
so you get the size
sometimes they have that photo just spend a little time online and check and
take a look at the
dimensions and the reviews read the reviews that's a great idea the governor
could if the governor
if the governor could say yeah you don't have to open up the stores but you do
have to hold the
item in your hand on the internet i would be fine okay
how's it going it's going all right what's going on with you where you calling
from amazing
i'm calling from vancouver uh canada oh yeah
what's up what's up what's up your hose up it's my it's my birthday today all
right
let's kick it over to skunk for the birthday spray out let's do it
happy birthday to emma who's on the zoom right now we've also got alfred bonner
51
chucky donchez 76 sandra livenheimer 33 frankie k 66 louise maplewood 52 and
this is interesting
louise and her husband louie maplewood both share a birthday today he is 53 he's
one year older than
her happy birthday mr and mrs maplewood all right that's the skunk's birthday
that's skunk's birthday
spray out
it's good to talk to you again we have vick burger the third vick's dad is on
the line
and vick uh how's it going down there in bethlehem this isn't tim is this is
tim yes sir
dad god you should introduce yourself hi dad well we got two uh two dads on the
line here
how do we get this going we have two i think we have uh doug's dad
we got double dance right now i never did these good things before wait
everyone cool out everybody
well i don't i don't remember it
well i don't remember yeah i do vick and gary i'd like to introduce you i'd
like to introduce
you to each other vick uh okay who am i talking to whose dad is this now
doug's dad oh doug's dad okay hi
how many dads you got i don't know they got a lot
that's that's the sad that's their saddest day they don't the father's day they
don't know who
their dad is right well something like that yeah that's every day
what did he do let us talk to ourselves and leave us alone here gee
well it's no one here for christ's sake you know where are you watching
washington dc where are you
i mean colorado oh okay colorful colorado that's what the sign says when you
cross the line
i don't believe oh well we we here in pennsylvania have some uh 70 degree
weather today unusual
well that's good i hope you guys stay like that i mean it's colder
well it's going down next week weekend they said it's going to get colder again
but we'll enjoy today
anyway well so how's your pandemic there well we got one in the neighborhood
one in the neighborhood
that's it oh yeah put a bag around him put his bag around his head and his
hands and everything
that's it that's it i'm going to send him over to some neighbor i don't like
you know
that's a good idea shake hands and shake hands with him
no no elbow bump no elbow bump okay guys thank you
thank you for all right thanks tim yeah it 