Name: Game Night with Doug & Vic (and Tim)
Uploaded: 2020-10-11T05:29:21.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Game Night with Doug & Vic (and Tim)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Game Night with Doug & Vic (and Tim)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-11. Transcript available.

Game Night with Doug & Vic (and Tim)

Hit it, Vic.
Hit it, Vic.
I'm the boss.
Oh, Doug's the boss, sorry.
All right.
That song needs to be beefed up a bit.
It's so wimpy.
I like that song.
Where's that delay coming from?
Is that my...
I'm hearing...
Is that a perfectly...
Is that coming from you?
It's me?
Is that an original composition?
That is.
I did that.
And you did all of it?
I wrote it and recorded it in 45 minutes.
How'd you do the drums?
Was it just like a...
Oh, you were just playing them.
Yeah, I just played it.
Oh, that's cool.
It has that natural, the human feel to it.
Right, right.
And I think I had the software using had automatic fills if I wanted to throw
it, so I just plopped
it in.
Oh, nice.
That's why it sounds sort of real, I think.
But...
Welcome to Game Night.
Game Night 3.
3?
Where's our camera?
Is there a wide?
Well, I think we're on this one now.
Is this the one we're looking at?
The middle one?
The middle one?
There's a delay, so it's a...
Oh, that one or this one?
This high up is what we're looking at now.
That one.
Okay, so...
Doug, sorry, you're the boss.
Doug, sorry, you're the boss.
I'll listen to you.
I don't have to be the boss.
I don't have to be the boss.
We're all the boss.
I was just going to explain how we're going to do it.
You put me in charge of running the games.
Echo?
Echo?
You're still hearing an echo?
Your mics are picking each other up and echoing.
Is that what the Zoomers are saying?
That's what the YouTubers are saying.
Well, maybe if they send us a super chat, we'll figure it out.
Do you have YouTube going in your thing?
I think Wes fixed it.
No, I don't.
I muted it.
I don't think they're picking up on it.
This is Game Night.
It's loose.
This is Game Night.
Let's...
Yeah.
If there's a little delay, it's okay.
It's fine.
Dickbutt is going wild in the super chat.
Wow.
We're going to have to refund him.
Do we have to refund him or something in the morning?
Sorry, Dickbutt.
He wants to know if there's any rare Matt Heads.
Very sweet.
What do you say?
Rare Matt Heads.
A Vic Head or a Doug Pounder or a Rare Matt Head.
I don't expect any Matt Heads.
Oh, fixed.
Good.
Okay.
I like how my Chaos Pad is off the screen.
People can't see my secret.
Oh, my God.
I just cut my hair.
Look how bad that looks.
Looks great.
I look like a Three Stooge.
A Three Stooge?
A Three Stooge.
I look like a Three Stooge.
Hello.
Welcome to Game Night.
This is Doug, your host.
We're going to do the Candyland board.
And we're going to play various games.
A lot of games.
A lot of board games and maybe a little surprise of a different type of game
later.
Yeah.
There might be a surprise.
So, what we're going to do with, if you win a round of any of the games, you'll
move up
one square on the Candyland board.
Do we have a Candyland shot?
It's not going to be every time you go, you roll and then you get free points
for no good
reason whether you win or lose.
We're not going to play like that.
Right.
We're going to play where winners win and losers fail.
Ironically, when the boss is away, we play by the rules.
Yeah.
As opposed to...
So, we're going to...
I'll be the red guy.
Vic will be the yellow one.
And then Matt will be the blue.
So, it'll be us three and the Zoomers will be helping.
Zoom, Zoom.
And they will be judging some of the answers because we have a...
I have developed a nude version of Balderdash.
A nude version?
Balderdash.
I'm completely nude under the table.
Right.
Sorry.
I don't have shoes.
When I walked in here, I was wearing sandals and the sandal strap just popped.
Wow.
And I had to throw it out.
I couldn't fix it.
So, I'm...
This is actually...
I don't know if it's ever been discussed directly with Vic, but technically,
this is a no-shoe
zone.
Oh, is it really?
Oh, I'm wearing my shoes tonight.
I'm sorry.
These are...
I don't like...
I took them.
They're pretty new.
Yeah.
I treaded lightly on the dirt outside and then I...
I had no idea.
There's a placemat or...
I always...
Yeah.
A foot mat.
A foot mat.
A foot mat.
I always, like, rub my feet really hard on the rug.
Before I...
You know, whatever it's called.
A foot mat before I come in, just so I don't...
Absolutely.
But I didn't know there was a rule.
There's not so...
Well, it's not strongly enforced, but it's technically in place.
But listen, I'm not gonna...
Okay, here's how we're gonna do balderdash.
Usually with balder...
My house is very messy, so that's...
I don't follow that rule.
Yeah.
Usually with balderdash, you get...
You pick one of these words that are an obscure word.
Okay.
Let's do an example.
A duff.
A duff?
Yeah.
This is just an example round.
So the other players would take a piece of paper and they have, like, a minute
to, like,
write a definition.
A duff-inition.
A duff-inition.
And then, um...
I don't know...
I don't know how...
I don't know how they win.
The...
But you could, like...
You have to make a funny definition of it.
You have to...
Um...
Well...
Typically, you want to write a definition that sounds real to make the person
who pulled
the card think that's the real one.
Then they flip it over to discover a duff is a small falcon, voted for his
unique hovering
ability.
I was going to say a tip of the hat.
But the way we're going to do it is there's not going to be anything writing
down.
No...
No...
Um...
Silences.
Right.
And it'll be...
Um...
I'll be the...
You'll be the balderdash.
I'll be the dasher, they call it.
The dasher.
And, uh...
It's one through five.
I guess maybe the zoomers could pick one through five.
And I'll say a word.
Bosky.
And then we'll just, off the top of our head, try to come up with a funny
definition.
All three of us.
Myself included.
Right.
And then you could be the next dasher, and then Matt can be the next dasher.
And the zoomers will pick what is the funniest...
The zoomers judge.
The zoomers judge.
Okay.
And if you get yours picked, you'll move up a square on the Candyland world
that we have
below us here.
Right.
There's about a hundred spaces there, so...
So we'll be...
We'll start with balderdash, and then we'll move on to some other games a
little bit later.
Yeah.
To some good balderdash music.
I mean, are we supposed to just hang out and talk, or do we want to play a game?
Yeah, let's just...
Let's just get...
Let's loosen up with a game.
I got nothing to talk about, so...
I can tell my mushroom story.
Let's go back to Meg.
Hi, Meg.
Let's go to some zoomers.
Oh.
Meg's camera fell, or did her...
Now I'm getting excited.
Hi, Meg.
A lot of headroom.
We're getting close.
There we go.
That's the shot.
Sefefefefe, Meg.
Sefefefefe.
Oh, you get...
There she is.
Oh, we can see her.
There we go.
There we go.
Very cool.
So, did you follow all that?
You're going to be the judge.
You'll get it.
All right.
Doug's going to...
Are you going to read the first one?
We're playing balderdash, and Meg is the judge.
The judge gets to pick the number between one and five to be the word we pick.
There's five words here.
Okay, Meg.
Pick a number between one and five.
Five.
There we go.
All right.
Oh, this is great because it sounds like sefefefefefefefefefehe.
The word is...
And then we'll go the person to the left of the dash.
Clockwise.
We'll go clockwise.
Okay.
I'm serious.
Cephalonomancy.
Cephalonomancy.
Cephalonomancy.
Cephalonomancy.
Oh, boy.
Not where I...
This is going to be a real slow game.
It's going to be a tough one.
Yeah, I didn't think about this.
Cephalonomancy.
It's a...
It's a lawnmower that has a camera on it, and you can watch yourself as you're
cutting
the grass.
So you can see your own face.
Cephalonomancy.
Yeah.
That's good.
Okay.
Cephalonomancy is...
It's a...
It's a sexual fetish related from the root, Ceph, which has to do with olfactory
stimulation.
So I should add, if you get the real answer, you're going to get three points.
Is that fair?
Cephalonomancy.
If you somehow know the definition.
If you somehow know the definition.
Olfactory hallucinations.
There you go.
Finally have a name for it.
Okay.
Cephalonomancy.
That's where you're popping a zit in a mirror, and then the spray forms the
form of your dad.
Wow.
Wow.
Whoa.
That's very specific.
All right, Meg.
Who's the winner?
Man.
I mean, it's a definition that is variable.
It could be any man.
Uh-huh.
What do you say, Meg?
What do you say, Meg?
Who wins?
Oh, gosh.
I think the first one.
The one more?
Vic wins.
All right.
Vic gets a point.
One point.
99 to go.
Meg, anything else on your mind tonight?
You're going to move up one to one.
Nothing?
It's clear.
There we go.
You went clear.
Oh, happy mental health day.
It's mental health day.
All right.
Bye, Meg.
Take care.
Meg, I'm very disappointed.
He didn't pick mine.
Let's talk to Colin Briggs with his Vic Burger shirt.
Oh.
Look.
Oh, you can see him.
Hey, guys.
How are we doing?
I love it.
Beautiful.
Looks great, man.
I didn't have a record yesterday, by the way.
I can hardly see, by the way.
I just got the cabinets and the cupboards on vinyl yesterday.
Oh, that's awesome, man.
Now we're talking.
Great.
With a lot of goodies.
Beautiful.
I love to hear that.
Thanks so much, man.
Okay.
I think we kind of graced over the new one as well.
Kind of got steamrolled by the M record.
It did.
Yes, yes.
It's hard to compete, but yeah.
I love it.
I love them both, but...
Thank you.
What kind of system you got?
What kind of vinyl player?
Technics 1200?
I got a Stanton.
Nice Stanton.
Nice.
What's that running into?
A tube amp from the 70s, I hope?
Warm analog sound?
No, just a digital mixer into some Yamaha.
Digital.
Oh, no.
Digital.
Come on.
That's not good.
That's not the way you're supposed to listen to Big Burger.
Please do not listen to it.
Please.
Man.
But yeah.
It was recorded digitally though, correct?
Well, I think actually about maybe three quarters was recorded on a Tascam 8-track,
multi-track
on cassette.
Like back in the day.
That's why you got to have it not running through a digital.
Right.
Right.
You can't do that.
I mean, yeah.
And the back of the record does it say AAA?
You know?
Like, it's like, remember those like little codes?
Right.
Analog, digital, digital.
No, I didn't go that far.
Triple A.
I think people cared that much, but no.
You can't all afford that expensive reel tape like Mr. Tim.
That's right.
I know.
Oh.
Tim's going to bust in here real soon.
He's going to take his off.
He's going to get, if he's watching, he's going to get steamed.
Do you guys want to talk about the Grateful Dead while he's on here?
Let's do it.
Brownhead Women.
I love that song.
I don't like the dead at all.
I think I like the dead less than Tim, actually.
Like, I have no tolerance for the dead.
How about fish?
I have less tolerance for fish.
Yeah, I'm not a fish fanatic.
I don't have a lot of tolerance for the dead, but the dead is okay once in a
while.
I saw fish on your shirt the other day, Doug.
Fish?
On WOHL, there was a logo there, right?
Oh, that's right.
That's right.
I had a Dream Street shirt on with every band logo.
I mean, there's going to be some whammies in there.
Right.
You can't, you can't.
I like the logo.
It can't be perfect.
I like the logo.
I don't like the brand.
The logo is cool.
Can't you separate the logo from the artist?
You know what?
I don't know.
I think there's some, there was a Billy Breeze, I think.
Is that the name of the album?
Yeah.
I bought that years ago, and that's pretty good.
I mean, from, I mean, I haven't heard it in 20 years, but.
I was, I was actually a fish head in high school.
Really?
That's my big confession.
Wait a second.
Interesting.
You like fish, but you have no tolerance for the dead.
Well, I liked fish, and I've gone back and tried, and it stinks.
So that's why I can definitively tell you.
Oh, man.
With a lot of research, it does, in fact, stink.
Wait, but listen to this.
Well, have you seen them since they've come back?
No, I don't want to see them.
In college, some dude that was like living across from in the dorms, he was
like, let's
go see a show tonight.
I was like, all right.
And then he took me to see John Fishma