Name: Nick Thorburn, Sarah Squirm, Donald Trump Jr. on Office Hours Live (Ep 157 5/12/21)
Uploaded: 2021-05-12T20:46:32.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nick Thorburn, Sarah Squirm, Donald Trump Jr. on Office Hours Live (Ep 157 5/12/21)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-12. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nick Thorburn, Sarah Squirm, Donald Trump Jr. on Office Hours Live (Ep 157 5/12/21)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-12. Transcript available.

Nick Thorburn, Sarah Squirm, Donald Trump Jr. on Office Hours Live (Ep 157 5/12/21)

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we've crossed the rubicon never done it before maybe we have but now we're for
this week only
at least maybe we'll see what happens next week we are an afternoon broadcast
we are we are your
lunchtime whatever or your lunchtime treat for your lunchtime dessert or if you're
on the east
coast we're looking at the drive time we're looking at what time is it in the
east coast
three o'clock and that's just cool just getting out kids are putting their backpacks
on they're
meeting in in the parking lot a lot of high school kids driving to school
meeting in the parking lot
trading cds buying weed and turning on their car stereos uploading the youtube
app and getting
office hours delivered to them through their black speakers and blasting it i'm
joined by the one and
only naperville's own dougalusenhop i'm not from naperville but thanks pretty
close pretty close
downers grove i should say and from bethlehem pennsylvania not bethlehem middle
east wherever
that is israel we don't know jesus is his homeland the land of christ victor
burger from pennsylvania
and with us in spirit and with us in spirit and in flesh vick you accept the
body and blood of jesus christ this morning i i i didn't drink the
i plan on it i had my coffee though i blessed my coffee and chugging it that wafer
get the eucharist down your throat my friend i'm going to be baptizing many
today matt you are not a christian but you you uh subscribe to the uh you're
part of the jewish faith
thank you jesus i am going to announce it here today i am a jew for jesus there
you go christ
so we have a lot of different ethnicities represented in the core four in the
in the holy trinity
it's white christians doug catholic 100 catholic baby the best the best
religion we're the original
the original original the original christians yeah the original stuff we
started this we started the
whole deal and we never uh we never left the path i like that uh i i was forced
to go to lutheran
school or uh church and i one one time i went with my friend to the catholic uh
church and they had the
uh the scents you could smell stuff like that absolutely we have the incense
the myrrh yeah yeah
i thought they do that the priest farts they got to dust them out they got to
dust it out
if you ever want to visit if you're in the allentown or even in just in in the
general northeast
you ever want to visit the church i attended the church i was baptized and
received first
uh communion and confirmation we're going to provide that information for you
right now it is
saint thomas moore church in allen campus you can drive by there honk your horn
and know that you're
visiting a very special place in my history my personal history does it have a
plaque up for you
there's a statue being commissioned right now by me wow that will be it'll be a
spaghet statue in front
of the saint thomas moore church congrats let us take a call from uh from our
zoomers to welcome you
we have a terrific show today we have on the schedule our friend who has a new
project to share with us
uh sarah squirm and a new guest of the show a friend of mine personal friend of
mine uh nick thornburn
from um islands islands in a lot of ways many islands gilligan's islands let's
do a game
i think we should do let's listen let's list our favorite gilligan's island let's
rank
the gilligan's island cast members for nick when he calls in okay
chris massey smoking a stogie what do you got today nice
enjoy my stogie i figure you guys like stogies now i thought i'd smoke look at
you is that your
garage yeah i have a i have a uh a uh garage door that's glass and a stogie and
kind of and a uh what
do you call it fan up there ceiling fan ceiling fan i do is this your band it
is it's also my office
what do you do yeah i'm a i'm actually a tv writer uh-huh so you're responsible
i'm a real i'm a real
yeah you know i write on you write csi well uh no yeah actually strangely
enough i write on uh
some soapy uh uh african american shows okay like what you don't want to reveal
no i can i've worked
on actually work with my wife we write on uh we've written on being mary jane
on bet uh we've written
on uh star on fox and uh what's that like empire it's like an it's like you
know empire yeah it's like a
sub sub and we're we're just working on a show that's based on the the step up
tv series like a dance
show cool so so you're in the wg wga i am in the w wga approved cigars yeah
that's where how do you
think i'd pay for them so uh where do you start do you sit in a room with a
bunch of people and go
well what are we going to do now since all the good ideas have already been
taken
we need a mind killigan's island episodes i tried i tried to reference all your
references but they
don't they don't get them they were trying to reference what you know you and
no no one actually
there's one tv writer that i met uh and she we were we bonded so much over over
uh on cinema that it was
like match made in heaven it was fantastic i love when people tell me call to
tell me that they don't
know anybody that knows me or is it one person look that's why i like you know
that's why we like it
isn't it it's it's it's niche we want this niche so uh what are you working on
now what's what's on
the what what's on you got a draft something needs a rewrite you gotta pitch
new ideas what's going on
there yeah we're working uh but you know as a tv writer we're just kind of scrounging
for work here
and there it's harder during covet obviously um we all we all work in zoom zoom
rooms uh which is cool
because i have a two-year-old son so i get to work from home obviously i prefer
it better but um yeah
we're working on a show called uh it's going to come out soon it's called our
kind of people
it's going to be on fox it's by lee daniels the same guy who did empire but uh
you know we work with
the same time we get hired by one show runner and they like us and they hire us
for other stuff so
it's is it about caucasian people or what no it's not it's not it's not about
it's not about me
do you feel uh you feel like you're you feel like you're in the room like you
it's uncomfortable for
you to write for african americans um no not because only because it's at first
yes but then
we um i don't know it's something that sort of happened we kind of developed
our own niche where
we are kind of the you know white we we joke that we're like the white people
that they hire that won't
make any microaggressions you know like uh-huh we're not you know stupid white
people in that way and
i think we just you know like i said it's not you know you can write different
voices and you can
but we try to be really respectful and you know most of the most of the time
like the most recent room
we were in we were the only white people in the room which is cool and we like
it it's you know it's
very you get a lot of different perspectives why don't you write me apart
anyway huh i'll be on one
i'll be on all those shows beyond any show any show you want i'll do oh really
can i can i can i try to
do that can i pitch you go ahead all right i'll be the white dork who comes in
and gets beat up or
something i don't know might be i don't know why he'd get beat up he might
maybe i'll be like a manager
who's a jerk i'll play a jerk or that you ever write for man caves on the diy
network no i don't but i
would love to i like a good man cave for sure that'd be a cool job all right
well we love having
friends in the entertainment industry uh you know that's great great to know
that this is an industry
show that's what the folks back at the uh you know the award ceremonies are
talking about when they're
taking a whiz in the bathroom in between the in the presentations hey did you
hear the latest office
hours funny dude somebody should get that somebody should get those guys on our
show by the way we're
replacing allen thank you very much for calling in we're gonna get let you go
get back to work
tim apple uh computers started in a garage so maybe this guy is like a steve
jobs of tv
just a thought yeah right have something there doug just a thought you keep
keep it you know keep in
touch with that guy that's all i'm saying oh i mean i'm gonna try to i try to
maintain great relationships
you know i i think i've been successful at that i have people coming out of the
woodwork
saying man what's been years we should do something together bro it's been a
while i don't burn bridges
i can doug and vick seem a little stiff today in the main shot well i mean in
the main shot yeah
there's i think we're leaning back on the drops because there might be a little
delay you know
i'm trying not to go crazy but do what do you need to do shall we talk about
the city of the day
city of the day
city of the day city of the day is sponsored by new sponsor today kip wingers
chip finger
are you sick of eating chips and putting your hand in that greasy chip bag
tired of getting to the
bottom of the bag and scrounging for the crumbs well so is kip winger that's
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and if you're and if you're into modern punk check out the thumb 41 and these
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i'm telling you do not work with ruffles or baked lays though unfortunately
very limited the city of the
day look at me i'm on sky i'm on track here to do the day i didn't sometimes i
blast through it forgot
that we were talking about the city today but i have not forgotten today see
the day is montpelier
vermont montpelier vermont and it is the beginning of a new code
folks this is code number one tim of the new code city number one of the new
code number one of the new code
if there's any complaints about this code they go to vic that's right came up i
did this one
were there complaints about the last road there were complaints on the air i
complained i think
what was the complaints it was the last week last week's code conclusion was
that it was the harlem globe
charters who were let some year right i thought it was a great code not
everyone agreed doug was upset
with that i wasn't upset i was like i don't know did we ever mention um like
talk about the globe
trotters it's not really like a thing on this show too much is it or has it so
what that's what i'm
saying that makes it tricky you know that's what i was saying last week make it
tangentially into the
show now they are now we're talking about them okay i'm talking about them i
talk about them all the time
who's that team that they play all the time the washington wizards washington
yeah generals the
washington oh oh wow i i talk about i talk about them all the time they're not
very good that team
uh you want to talk to don jr we got don jr yes but let me just say one thing
uh that's i find very important
uh the the weather in montpelier vermont is a high of 59 and a low of 37 wow
that's extreme cold cold
nights uh yeah let's talk to uh the former uh disgraced president of the united
states although i have
something to say about that um later in the show hey guys fun his son don jr is
a big part of the media
john jr's media uh he was a good spokesman for the president for a long time
and a celebrated author
in his own right and a entrepreneur i suppose hey don still a very good spokesman
hey guys it's me don
jr you believe this crap going on with the gas shortage out there i wanted to
bring that up because
you know this is big news there is a gas shortage ladies and gentlemen if you're
not paying attention to
the news i know a lot of people are stuck watching old vic probably has no clue
he's watching old beach
boys video i just