Name: Tom Scharpling, Sarah Potenza on Office Hours Live (Ep 165 7/15/21)
Uploaded: 2021-07-16T02:07:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tom Scharpling, Sarah Potenza on Office Hours Live (Ep 165 7/15/21)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tom Scharpling, Sarah Potenza on Office Hours Live (Ep 165 7/15/21)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-07-16. Transcript available.

Tom Scharpling, Sarah Potenza on Office Hours Live (Ep 165 7/15/21)

Let's get started!
Let's go!
The real time was started!
The first time was the original version of the book.
The first time was the first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time to read the book.
The first time was the first time was the first time to read the book.
I'm the new Ellen.
I'm the new Ellen.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to an evening edition of Office Hours Live.
It is 5:30 p.m. on the Pacific time zone.
It is hot as hell.
There's no evening cool breeze coming through.
It's hot as hell.
It's July 15th, 2021.
I'm joined in studio.
Forget the guys behind me.
Doug Lussenhoff, DJ Doug Pound is here.
I respect that.
Zeke Berger.
I'm in here.
Vic Berger, the fourth.
You know that?
Yes.
The fourth.
I just spent 10 days with V3.
All right, all right.
Happy to be back.
You're not the guest I'm interviewing.
It's like Johnny would say, "So what did you do?
Where have you been?
You have a nice summer?"
No, he wouldn't.
All right.
I'm off my game.
I gotta reset.
Give me a little lollipop lollipop, Doug.
Give me a little lollipop lollipop.
Lollipop lollipop lollipop lollipop lollipop.
Lollipop lollipop lollipop.
Lollipop lollipop lollipop.
Boom, boom, boom, boom.
Lollipop lollipop lollipop lollipop.
Very good.
I am...
The big news is we are in studio.
I am in studio with...
Well, he's in studio.
I'm in the studio as always.
But in studio with me, and we're gonna be talking to him a lot later in the
show, is Tom Sharplin.
Thank you.
A lot later.
Yeah, a lot later.
Got a few segments before me.
Yeah, we always do the city of the day in a fake commercial, and then we want
to talk to the Zoomers.
And we got a bunch of people calling in.
We have Colin Hanks calling in today.
Awesome.
Colin Hanks is gonna go.
And then we're gonna get to Tom, who's got a new book out called "It Never Ends:
National Best Seller."
And we're gonna talk about that later in the show.
Wow.
So no questions for Tom if you do call in until the 6:30 hour.
6:30 hour.
We just want to keep a structure going.
Keep a structure today.
Keep a rigid sketch sketch sketch.
And Paul Schaefer's gonna be joining us too.
Paul Schaefer from the Tonight... from the Late Show with David Letterman.
What do you think Paul Schaefer's up to these days?
Is he beating the heat in New York?
I think he's probably like, "Is it hot enough for you out there?"
You think Paul Schaefer's like...
I think my idea would be that he's in like Sun Valley, Utah or something.
He's just got a whole other thing going on for the summer.
Yeah.
Do you think that's where you get it?
I picture he would get a shore house in like Virginia.
Yeah.
Like his neighbors are like working for the State Department.
Yes.
He's looking at Mount Misery.
Do you know about Mount Misery?
No.
This is awful.
This is a true awful story that I just learned when the disgraced former
Secretary of Defense,
Donald Rumsfeld passed a few...
Last week?
A couple weeks ago?
He had purchased a summer home.
I think maybe he just lived there because he's retired.
Yeah.
Four Seasons home called...
That's known.
That's a historical site called Mount Misery.
And it's called that because, I'm not kidding, the former slave who became...
I'm blanking on his name.
This was the...
Gladiator?
No.
No.
He was like friends with Lincoln and everything.
Oh, okay.
What's his name?
Guys, help me out.
Frederick Douglass?
Frederick Douglass.
Okay.
In Frederick Douglass's memoir, he described this place where he was sent to be
broken.
And it was a guy that lived in this house in Virginia who would, like, beat and
torture,
you know, misbehaving slaves.
Mm-hmm.
And it was so well known that the house was known as Mount Misery.
Sure.
And that's where Rumsfeld, of all people, ends up with...
Do you think he...
Scum.
Do you think I was, like, a fourth grader, he learned that in school and wrote
it down
as, like, some day?
A life goal?
Yeah.
Um...
Bucket list.
Bucket list, Doug.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Tom, do you want to play a quick name that drop?
I'm curious if you'll get this.
Sure.
This is hard as hell.
Okay.
But we just got it today.
This is a new, very new segment I developed.
And...
Okay.
Developed with my team.
Sure.
It's a whole other team that works that...
It's not Doug or Vic or Matt.
It's a whole other...
Okay.
You got different writers that come in?
Yeah.
Yeah.
We developed segments and dreams.
Breakout room.
Segment producers.
Yes.
Here it is.
And maybe we'll just leave it open for the...
For the night...
For the show and see...
Okay.
If you don't get it.
Sure.
Ready, Doug?
Okay.
There it is.
That will be three, two...
Okay.
That?
Yeah.
Oh, I have no idea what that is.
You haven't...
Okay, good.
You haven't manipulated that.
Okay.
No, I have not.
That's okay.
That is it.
You're gonna enjoy it when it's...
Nah, yeah.
But we'll let the audience see if they can figure it out.
Matt, keep it in the chat.
I mean, I can do other drops that are hints if you want.
Mm.
Who's got a guess?
Oh, yeah.
I just think you'll enjoy it when you find out.
Okay.
Okay.
Think about it.
Sure.
Can you impersonate it?
Oh, it's not that guy on South Park, is it?
No, it's not.
That teacher.
It's not that.
Oh, that's okay.
Okay.
That's a little different.
That's more like a...
Okay.
Yeah.
This is...
That one.
Okay.
No, that's the one.
That's him.
It's not.
Okay.
I think we have a Zoomer who might have it.
Really?
Okay.
Yeah.
Ben Ferguson, are you there?
Yes.
Hi, everyone.
Hey, Ben.
Hi, Tom.
Hey, Tom.
Hi, Tim.
Hi, Vic.
Hi, Doug.
Hey, Ben.
Hi.
And I think I know what that clip is from.
Okay.
But...
Were you watching my Instagram live?
I was not.
Okay.
No, I think I was.
It was, yes.
Okay.
But I didn't know it from that.
Okay.
Yes.
Yes.
Take your best guess.
That is Rick Moranis as Michael McDonald.
Rick Moranis as Michael McDonald from the SCTV sketch.
Sure.
Where he goes in and sings that one song.
That's right, yes.
When he does "Ride Like the Wind".
Yes.
Yeah.
Where he's running back and forth.
Yeah.
Can you play the full...
That part of the clip, Doug?
No, probably not.
Yeah.
One second.
Which part?
Just like the context of that clip.
Meantime.
Okay.
Hold on.
Oh, Ben's version is great.
Well, I mean...
I just meant the...
You mean like the end?
That's the record.
That's just the song.
He runs in and sings just that part.
Yeah.
I mean, I guess just the moment where he comes out...
Okay.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Here we go.
It's in a recording, Steve.
Thanks a lot, man.
I'll probably need you next week.
I'll give you a call.
Okay.
Oh, that's perfect.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
It's so funny in the sketch, 'cause he's singing like this.
I'm a little girl.
Isn't it weird when singers have their regular speaking voices like so
different?
I wonder if he speaks like that.
I don't know.
What do you think?
Should we give Ben a book?
Should that be his prize?
I don't have any books to give away.
Do you?
Right there?
Well, I actually have one upstairs, so yes.
Ben, did you already...
I mean, it's a national bestseller, so...
I have already purchased it.
You've already purchased it, see?
Yeah.
Yep.
My wife and I each have purchased it, and we finished it on our own.
Well, you can't share copies of the book.
His and her copies?
No.
No.
They each bought copies.
Oh, that's how I need it.
We have two copies.
Oh, thank you, Ben.
I appreciate that.
Did you...
And the audiobook's out, too.
Yeah.
That's pretty smart.
You did that ahead of time.
Sometimes, you know, it all launched at once.
No, we really had the day and date worked out perfectly worldwide.
How did you enjoy...
Well, how did you enjoy doing the audiobook?
I didn't.
No, it's horrible, right?
It was one of the worst experiences of my life.
Did I tell you what...
And I have to apologize to the...
Because he's a listener, and Justin Martell gave me this opportunity to do the
audiobook
for Tiny Tim's biography.
Mm-hmm.
And I've told Justin this, it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
It's very hard.
Very hard.
I don't want to do it again.
It's not...
I'm not a good reader.
I'm not a good...
I would sit there and read.
They basically...
You don't do multiple takes.
People think it's just like you're gonna do...
It's just like I was reading straight through.
Mm-hmm.
And then you read until you flub something.
Which is...
How often?
All the time?
A fair amount, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
But then they would, like, back it up a sentence or two and play you back in.
So I would, like, flub a thing where I'd be like...
Mm-hmm.
I'd be like, "Yeah."
And then I realized I got to the hospital and my father was dead.
And I realized my father was...
I saw my mother crying, I realized my father was dead.
And I would flub the next sentence and be like, "Oh, let's play it back in."
And so it's like...
I hear in the headphones, I hear me saying, "And then I realized my father was
dead."
And I could never get the next sentence, right?
Right.
Because I keep freaking myself out by hearing me...
Right.
And you have to come in, like, right after it.
I'll try to...
Let's see how far I get.
And I didn't think about doing this, but let's see how far I get before you'd
have to stop me.
Sure.
Right, just a random page here.
"William had now lost two times in a couple of hours and decided that this..."
There we go.
"William had now lost..."
There we go.
"William had now lost..."
I'm not doing a bit.
And I am, like, on, you know, maybe a little not in the zone.
"William had now lost two times in a couple of hours and decided that his only
option was to chase a good time no matter what.
He returned from the concession stand holding a beer the size of a bucket and
immediately started chugging."
Already you're like...
I would get this sing-songy quality in my voice too when I beat it.
I'm just like, "I hate the person reading this."
Yeah.
And it's me.
Yeah, I know.
Like, ugh.
But the other thing about the Tiny Tim book was it was full of names.
And, like, Eastern European names and just...
In case anyone doesn't know what Tiny Tim sounds like.
Like, as you were reading it, you were kind of learning he was a perv