Name: Wait Wait it's Office Hours... Live with David Wain (Episode 231)
Uploaded: 2022-12-10T20:18:55.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Wait Wait it's Office Hours... Live with David Wain (Episode 231)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-10. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Wait Wait it's Office Hours... Live with David Wain (Episode 231)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-12-10. Transcript available.

Wait Wait it's Office Hours... Live with David Wain (Episode 231)

I like having fun, I like to laugh, I like to meet people who can make me laugh
I like having fun, yes I like to laugh, I like having fun to meet people who
laugh
Oh, yeah. We gotta get played out. Yeah.
Cool.
Oh, hi. Good morning.
Good morning.
That's the opening.
Turn that off.
Turn it off.
Wait, I can still hear you.
I see a black screen now.
Good morning. Good Saturday to you. Good Saba.
Shabbat? Shabbat Shalom.
Shabbat Shalom.
What's happening, Olivia?
It's total chaos, total chaos.
We've stepped back in time.
It looks like we're on now.
All right.
Here we go.
Let's run it.
Live from Glendale, California.
It's Wait, Wait, Don't Kill Me.
It's Wait, Wait, Don't Kill Me with me, your host, Peter Segal.
Peter Segal.
Yeah, do your goddamn announcer voice.
This is Bill Curtis.
Aw, forget it.
Uh, I just want to contextualize because one of the things I want to talk about
today is,
yeah, can we get David Wayne's fucking camera angle right?
I don't, I don't, you have this, all this technology, yeah, poor David Wayne.
Up, up, up.
Up, up.
You're a director, right?
You want to direct this?
That's it.
Can you please?
Right there, boom.
Locked in.
Do you like center punch?
I like to center punch if I'm like going for the punch.
Yeah.
Sometimes you want to go to the side.
You want to create a little, uh, some composition that's interesting.
If you want the tension in the mise en scene.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Uh, but we do want to also acknowledge that you'll be doing some card tricks
for us.
If you want.
Sleight of hand.
And that will require an additional, why don't we have a whole other camera
here.
Watch this.
Bing.
Down below.
Boom.
Okay.
There you go.
There's your B cam.
David Wayne is here.
Mount Rushmore of alt comedy.
No.
I would say that to you.
Well, then we're both up there.
All right.
There's room for more.
There's four of us.
Today, we're going to pick the Mount Rushmore of alt comedy.
Can't wait.
All right.
Well, there's just room for two others.
If you two around.
Right.
Okay.
That's true.
Uh, David Brenner.
Alt comedy.
I don't know.
Yeah.
It's a little off.
A little off center.
Jim Brewer.
Jim Brewer.
Goat boy.
Well, there's a whole list.
We're going to have a big list.
We'll talk about it.
And we'll whittle it down.
Just like the carver on the mountain whittled it down.
Carved it down.
The irony that you say carver, George Washington carver.
Created.
Mount Rushmore.
No, I don't think so.
Listen.
It's chaos.
What's Patton Oswalt's great line?
Oh.
Welcome to the show.
That's how he starts all his standup specials.
Oh, welcome to the show.
Welcome to the show.
I'm Patton Oswalt.
Yeah.
Let's get into it.
Then he goes, let's get into it.
Yeah.
I haven't worked on my Patton in a while, but he always comes out.
If you listen to Patton, he's always like, welcome to the show.
Let's get into it.
You know?
It's like, that's his thing.
Yeah.
And then he does the news.
Yeah.
But not exactly, it's never exactly the news.
It's always just a little bit to the left.
It's like the news from Mars.
Yeah.
You know?
He'll put his spin on it and then it makes you see the news for what it is
because he's
got that prism.
Yeah.
Anyway, sorry.
You got to start the show.
I do have to.
Good morning, everybody.
Welcome.
Happy Saturday.
I pour a cup of joe.
I'm already out, but it's just going to be, it's a weird, first of all, let me
just
explain, producer Matt passed away last night.
Just like that.
Just like that.
He's gone.
Good riddance.
No, Matt is down with the flu.
What are you looking at?
You're watching the show?
I'm just, I like to peek into the control room and see how the sausage is made.
You came in here, Olivia's sitting in the captain's chair.
Great.
Good luck to you.
Smooth sailing.
So far, not so great.
No.
It's been rough.
It was like the movie Broadcast News when I came in here.
How about when in Broadcast News, the sweat.
Everyone was sweating.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Albert Brooks.
Got to be one of your heroes.
Absolutely.
Vic also passed on last night.
Actually, Matt and Vic murder suicide situation.
It was very sad to get that news.
I think...I think...I think...
Nick Burger.
Also, Wes is out. Luke is out.
We have a bunch of newbies running the show.
It's like the animals have taken over the zoo.
Thank God I'm here.
Yeah, I know.
And thank God you got a good attitude.
Because the first thing David said when he came in was,
"This is so inspiring."
Now, you've changed that perspective, I assume now.
It's evolved, I would say.
But the great one.
David Doug Lussenhop is here.
Good horning.
And you're only doing horn and alarm sounds today.
That's all that I can get to work.
Matt usually gets the other ones working.
Oh.
Let's do this.
Let's welcome a Zoomer to the show
to make sure that side of the equation is equating to success.
Bringing in a Gen Z person.
Yeah, we'll get the youngest person on Zoom.
Let's bring him in.
Okay?
We're throwing you into the deep end.
Olivia.
Who do you think?
I don't think her mic is on.
You've got to do the talk.
There's like a talk button, right?
Is it the old stand by press to talk?
Yes.
Okay.
It's like the cough button.
I've heard about that.
Go ahead.
Great.
I don't know where it is.
Bring Matt into the Zoom so he can tell you.
Matt.
Calling all Matt.
Hi.
Hey, mate.
Producer Matt, shame on you.
Now I'm getting excited.
I died.
It's true.
This is heaven.
Yeah, it's heaven.
All right.
Is this the worst opening to a show that's ever happened?
Well, it was okay from this side as a viewer.
We heard the theme song.
I think you probably didn't.
Olivia, there's a little box.
There's a little box with a one, two, three on it or something.
Great.
Okay.
Now clip the red wire.
Don't touch the green one.
It's the box with the one, two, three.
There must be a box.
Look at that black box there, right there.
Beak, beak, beak.
Yeah.
Flip that dial to two.
Oh, flip it to two.
Okay.
Now you're live.
There you go.
Talk into the mic.
Hello.
Talk into the mic.
Okay.
Goodbye, Matt.
Okay.
Bye-bye.
Good luck.
I have someone.
Okay.
Who's there?
Let's do Mike.
You're out.
Mike McDowell?
Is that how you say your name?
Can you get out?
Mike?
Hey, what's up?
Hey, Mike.
Oh, my God.
It works.
Oh, that's Mike McDowell.
It works.
You know Mike.
I don't know.
He loves a Misfix.
Mike, your framing is worse than David Wayne's.
How so?
He's right in the center.
It's fine.
Well, you can go tight.
Yeah, I'm good.
You could do more of like a head shoulder.
It'd probably be better.
I just don't.
I just want to show all my synthesizers and stuff.
Look at all that stuff, man.
Cool.
Where are you calling from?
Redondo.
i just don't i just want to show all my synthesizers and stuff look at all that
stuff man
cool where are you calling from redondo
redondo beach nice i think so south of hermosa okay you did an okay job making
your bed today
let's see i know i would say b minus too tired how come you're not at the beach
living up the beach life cold i just got just got done with so many tests at
school
no time for the sand oh you got finals yeah i'm in law school law school we see
we have a smart
audience yeah but if he's finished with the tests now would be the time for
this yeah now's the time
for the sand good point so i guess i don't i don't just jump out of those
things and go straight to
the beach you need to decompress exactly all right do you want to play a quiz
sure now i'm getting
excited uh this give me something doug
for a hundred point this georgia senator held on to his seat this past tuesday
is it a raphael
warnock b reverend run simmons c herschel walker or d a warlock it's got to be
a warlock
must be a warlock no dave you want to steal i'm gonna i'm gonna go with a reverend
warnock
that is correct 100 points thank you all right anything else i can help you
with today
yeah i know that i got called on randomly but i actually had something in mind
which is why i got
on the zoom um i really love how you guys always play those uh youtube videos
of people
fucking up on stage okay i know what he's talking about youtube.com yeah yeah
yeah yeah if you've
heard of that website now i'm talking about like this like footage that you've
shown of like robbie
krieger and people like that yes having really weird yeah hashtag fail exactly
well i'm i'm a huge fan of
this green day video called one fucking minute where billy joe just has this
total meltdown ends the
show and is super pissed because he runs at a time and i don't know if that's
something that you guys
want you want to watch together or if i could recommend that one as a possible
entry into the
canon that's kind of why i got it look can we get some of our uh experts i
think i have this drop
somewhere but well we'll put it i've seen it they're they're kicking he's at a
festival and he's out of
time exactly and he's uh having a a hissy fit because he wants to stay on stage
and keep playing
his songs sounds like it'd be kind of fun thing to see any he start he tries to
like make the climax of
it that he's gonna break his guitar like rockstar style and he just can't do it
like he just starts
swinging and it just hits the stage and just like pops right back up it's the
funniest thing in the
world the funniest thing in the world he is well i have a david wayne's project
do you want to hear
the i have an audio i have a drop of that you want to hear it yeah yeah oh yeah
one minute left you're
gonna give me one minute let me tell you something let me tell you something
all right i've been around
since 1980s not that long irrelevant give me one minute you gotta be kidding me
what's the what is
the point of the 1988 what how does that he's just lived it he know you're not
gonna i'm just not some
new kid you can boss around so however long you've been around is how much more
time you should get yeah
yeah yeah you earn there's a calculus you earn time but my pushback is this i
have a slightly different
angle these shows are big organized productions i've done lots of live shows
you know going in what
the deal is not to mention you're you have a tour yeah it's terrific thank you
the tour is terrific
uh but there's no doubt in my mind that somebody on the green day staff the
manager tour manager
people they know about the curfew assuming this is an outdoor venue
yeah it's a big outdoor festival so it's time to go it's time to go you know
cold play has to get up
there and put their stuff together there are rules i'm a believer in rules you
know that there's a
reason why he ran the time yes yeah his fault but you know backstage there's a
piece of paper printed
out with with numbers on it and it dictates when the show is going to start and
when it's going to end
you know people are getting a lot of those people who work in a concert venue
and most people do not
know this are paid by the hour a lot of them are the security vendors and they're
not getting overtime
if billy joe decides he wants to do another encore of uh welcome to a new kind
of tension
if you want to know music business um sort of lingo ot for overtime also i
would say you know he's having a
bad day he should why do we want to relive his trauma and put a spotlight on
that poor billy joel
billy joe billy joe joe joe all right thanks for the tip
i want to shout out david wayne who's joining us in the studio in a few minutes
um oh he's here
first of all you are
i mean it's weird because you're like a little older than me in the comedy
scene like you came
early i was ahead of you for like five years yeah or maybe more i mean because
you guys started really
young yeah did you start too young is the state too young for you well i we did
this we were on it we
had our own show on mtv in my early 20s yeah yeah that was too early i didn't
appreciate it i didn't
appreciate you know what i'll be honest with you i didn't appreciate that sucks
sorry you had to do that no
it was a great launch pad yeah i didn't appreciate it i didn't and and like
just in all there's no
reason to go negative here but i like when 