Name: SUBSCRIBE AT YOUTUBE.COM/OFFICEHOURSLIVE - Bobcat Goldthwait, Black Belt Eagle Scout (Ep 248)
Uploaded: 2023-05-04T18:22:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'SUBSCRIBE AT YOUTUBE.COM/OFFICEHOURSLIVE - Bobcat Goldthwait, Black Belt Eagle Scout (Ep 248)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'SUBSCRIBE AT YOUTUBE.COM/OFFICEHOURSLIVE - Bobcat Goldthwait, Black Belt Eagle Scout (Ep 248)' from Tim Heidecker on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-04. Transcript available.

SUBSCRIBE AT YOUTUBE.COM/OFFICEHOURSLIVE - Bobcat Goldthwait, Black Belt Eagle Scout (Ep 248)

Next up, we have 7, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 10, 11, 21, 22, 23, 24, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28,
28, 29, 29, 29, 29, 29, 29, 30, 29, 30, 30, 30, 30, 31, 32, 32, 32, 33, 33, 33,
33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33,
33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33,
33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33,
33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33, 33,
*Mario plays*
I like having fun, I like to laugh, I like to meet people who can make me laugh,
I like having fun, yes I like to laugh.
Good morning everybody, it's Tim Heidecker live from Newark, not Newark, where
am I? Hoboken, New Jersey, New York, right across the river, looking over here,
beautiful New York.
Looking over at the West Village over here, the Hudson River, what a beautiful
city this is. I can't wait to say good morning to my friends back in California.
And I'll tell you what, these guys are some of the great guys doing radio,
doing sound effects, doing all kinds of work, comedy, music.
I'm talking about Vic and Doug, I'm gonna start with Doug here, Doug Lusenhop,
back there behind me.
Good morning!
Doug Lusenhop, good morning to you.
Nice.
Nice.
And I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what, nobody does it better than Doug.
There I fucking said it.
Thank you.
Nobody does it better, except maybe some days, I'm not talking every day, I'm
saying maybe every once in a while at least gets as good as, if not better,
every once in a while I'm talking about Vic Burry.
Vic Burry from Philly area, not really.
Let's give it a sip, what sip everybody.
And that's the two guys that you gotta know in this town, you know.
And they do good work, they do good work, doing sounds, whatever.
So, I don't know, you know, I don't know what they do, but they do a good job.
So we're gonna have fun, we're gonna talk about the Mets and the Rangers a
little bit later.
They're playing hockey, and this and that.
So we're gonna have a good time.
Matt, producer Matt there is over there, he's from Long Island, whatever.
How you doing there?
Pretty good.
So we're all doing pretty good, right?
I mean, who fucking knows?
Producer Matt?
Now we're gonna have a good time, we're talking about New York, talking about
Hudson River, whatever.
Matt is...
What do you have a nice breakfast this morning, a good New Jersey breakfast?
A pork roll?
Yeah, I'm at the hotel, you know, so they got hotel food.
Pretty good.
Bagels and whatnot.
Did you get that little ketchup, a little single serving glass bottle of
ketchup?
Oh, I love that.
Yeah, a little ramekin, whatever.
This and that.
They fucking put ketchup in that, a little thing of butter, a little fucking
butter in there.
And eggs, you know, the whole fucking thing.
Coffee.
Fucking...
Don't play that guy.
Hot fudge sauce.
Oh, yeah.
Hello, food fan.
What's the deal with that guy, Matt?
A little bit of butter in there.
What's going on?
He's canceled.
He's a bad boy.
Feature man.
Feature man is no...
He's no good man.
You sent this video, or he had to come out and address his arrest in the 1970s.
Yeah.
We're talking about feature man, guy who makes hungry man dinners.
Yeah.
What was he arrested on camera?
He was evasive.
He said it was for sodomy.
Yeah.
He never really addressed...
And he left out the underage part.
He never addressed the core issue.
He never addressed what he was arrested for.
Ugly stuff.
Yeah.
If you don't want to say...
So what else do we know?
I believe...
I don't know.
I believe some random YouTuber.
I guess.
I don't know.
Who posted about it.
We've been trying to see the Tostitos, cheddar cheese.
But he went on this.
I mean, it was almost like he was just kind of running the clock out.
Well, when they brought me into the holding cell, there was a writ.
A prosecutor mentioned that they wouldn't be trying me for the crime.
It was just like, you know, just trying to like, wait it out.
Wait the whole video out.
But it's not...
But he made it sound like they threw it out.
They threw out the charges.
It did.
It was a technicality.
So this is...
It seems like that's where he learned to cook.
Like he would get saltines or, you know, mill away for...
He didn't go to prison.
In prison?
No, he went to jail.
I was charged for offense to mankind or to public decency.
But there was no evidence.
So...
I don't know.
It was very weird.
Still love the guy.
Yeah.
I mean, come on.
And this was a long time ago.
Yeah.
It was the 70s.
People change.
Things are different.
It's the 70s.
It's the 70s.
It's the 70s.
It's the 70s.
It's not...
Well, anyway.
It's a cloaked cigarette.
I had some nudie magazines.
And I was showing them to an 8th grader.
Oh, God.
But anyway.
Name a pet meds.
The best meds your pet can get.
Skip them.
God, I fell asleep to YouTube last night.
My normal interrogations and I woke up.
You fall asleep to interrogations on YouTube?
I fall asleep to interrogations.
Yeah, I do.
What are those nightmares like?
No, they're fine.
But this...
I had a bad dream because I woke up and I was listening.
It just auto-played to Chris Hansen, like his new show.
Like interviewing, you know, breaking up predators and stuff.
So it's just like, that's in my head right now.
Pretty cool.
Well, I've had two terrible nights of sleep.
I haven't told you guys.
Two terrible nights.
What?
How can you?
How?
You're in a nice hotel.
I don't know what happened.
I mean, I'm usually not like a jet lag time change guy who has to, you know,
complains about
that kind of stuff.
I usually roll with it.
I get in.
I go out.
I go have dinner.
I go back.
I go to sleep.
Whatever.
But I get in Sunday.
I have...
No, I get in Monday and settle into this nice hotel.
I meet some friends for dinner.
Have dinner.
Go up to go to bed.
I get into bed around 10 o'clock, 11 o'clock.
Now, you know, I'm on West Coast time.
So, sure.
I was kind of lying around all day on the plane and everything.
I'm not...
My body isn't ready for sleep, I guess.
I'm up, Vic, Doug, Matt, Wes, Luke, Sam, audience.
I'm up till three fucking AM.
Oh, my God.
Three.
Three.
Just lying.
Lying in bed.
Cursing my life.
And then I sleep until like 9:30 AM.
Get up.
I've got to go do some stuff for this movie I'm doing.
This and that.
Why is this and that my new catchphrase?
This and that.
What not.
I go...
All right.
Tonight's the night.
I'm going to conk out.
God forbid, right?
Give me some rest.
I'm up till 3:00 AM, 4:00 AM the next night.
Ugh.
But then your time...
And I got to shoot today.
But your time, that's only midnight, basically.
Doesn't matter, Vic.
Doesn't matter.
I know.
Well, then...
I want to go to bed and get my eight.
It's something you're doing.
Something you're putting in your body.
It is.
Coffee.
What are you doing?
It is.
I'm not comfortable in this hotel.
I need to be home next to my wife.
Knowing my children are next door, you see.
My children moved out.
They moved out?
Yeah.
They live in the house next door to us now.
Who lives there with them?
Just...
Are they by themselves?
Just them.
Yeah.
Just them.
Did you...
Let's see how that works.
You know who we haven't talked to in years?
Matt Van Dam.
Remember Matt Van Dam?
Doesn't ring a bell.
Tim, I've heard about...
Hey, guys.
Can you hear me?
I'll tell you later.
Loud and clear.
Hold that thought, Doug.
No worries.
Oh, hi, Matt.
How are you?
Oh, hey.
I'm doing well.
How's it going, Tim?
Pretty good.
Where are you calling from?
Can you hear me?
Oh, I'm calling from Atlanta.
I'm at the stages right now, so I don't want to be too loud.
I was hoping that you were going to be joining us down here.
You're at the what?
At the...
I'm at the...
I'm in Atlanta.
Yes, but you said...
At the stages.
What's the stages?
What are the stages?
One of the many, many, many stages.
We have more than a lay now, apparently.
Is it a retirement center?
What is this?
Can I just pause?
Guys, let me get...
When you...
You keep on saying the stages, like we know what you're talking about, but we
don't.
Well, these are...
I think...
What's this...
What are they called now?
I can't remember.
Studios, you know?
Oh, Sound Stages.
I can't remember the...
Yeah, Sound Stages.
I can't remember the name of this one now.
They have so many, and they keep...
They changed the name recently, too, so...
Oh, okay.
Okay.
So you're on set.
Oh, it's a set.
Oh.
Not set.
No.
Preparing.
Prep.
Okay.
Prepting.
Are you making a Nike commercial?
No, no.
Making these new shoes look old.
No.
Oh.
And so what project are you working on?
Oh, I can't really say, but I was hoping that you would end up on it because it's
a lot
of your friends involved with it.
So I was thinking maybe you were going to end up down here, but you're in New
York, so
I guess not.
Damn Apple.
Hmm.
What opportunity am I missing out on?
It should be pretty funny stuff.
Some funny, funny people.
I love Batman.
That's not all I can say.
Give me one name.
What's your name?
Hmm.
I'm like.
No, no, no.
One name will give me a lot of trouble.
Oh my goodness.
Anyways.
Why is this guy crossing the picket line?
What's going on with that?
Oh, let's hear about that.
That's what I want to talk about.
So that's what I was going to talk about.
So first off, the last strike, right?
What do we get?
Reality television.
And what did that bring us?
Donald Trump.
And now what's the big thing?
AI.
So will this strike bring us our new AI overlord?
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
new ai overlords that's my big question oh ai president president president i
like that president
i have thoughts on the strike and uh and we're going to get into that later in
the show that's
all i can say right now just like you i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna have uh i'm
gonna be confused
and i'm gonna make make i'm gonna allude to things and then really not follow
through with any actual
information okay i actually shouldn't really say it would be good for the show
but i shouldn't say
well i'm glad to see that you're still going and uh that you guys are still up
and running i was
worried don't know how everything's gonna you know uh it's a it's a an uh new
territory i guess
no we've doug and i have tried to start a uh you know a little thing going here
but tim does not
let us do it trying to trying to get a what little what little thing just a
union that
we've been talking about it drops you yeah so hey i like your my opinion let's
do this i like
your maya darren shirt by the way to get it at one of her oh yeah thank you uh
yeah i did it's
huge dinner she rocks really loud but great stuff sorry sorry let's do this let's
thank you matt
thank you guys bye bye um let's do the city of the day
all right city of the day i'm getting excited oh the city of the day is brought
to you by
hang on working out the tech here folks i'm not
all right matt i just opened the fake ads i'm not seeing anything here
fake ads sorry to give it away but doug usually does that well yeah i didn't
write one we're on
strike no fake what's that we're i'm on strike so there's no i didn't write a
fake ad
how are you on strike we're not this are you in the wga i stand in solidarity
yeah
all right well this isn't a wga signatory show not yet you're actually can i
can i just point out
that doug and vic and matt and me for we're we're owners we're producers of
this show we own
we own this show it's our show so we're not when you talk about like forming a
union
i gotta go on you're talking about within a union yeah yeah you're talking
about forming
a union against your own interests it's not fair because you guys own this you
like we're for we're
for the people understand i don't know if this is not clear to people but yes
this is office hours
live i don't even think it has with tim heidecker in it anymore is it what's
the official name of
this show technically it does but okay well let's even if it does yeah when i
tell people the name
of the show i tend to leave that out well that's the top of our demands but
yeah we'll get to that
during negotiations you're going to be negotiate just so you k