Name: 81: I can't take it anymore [Nate's audio fixed]
Uploaded: 2024-08-19T15:40:56.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video '81: I can't take it anymore [Nate's audio fixed]' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video '81: I can't take it anymore [Nate's audio fixed]' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-08-19. Transcript available.

81: I can't take it anymore [Nate's audio fixed]

I can't take no more.
Is that a song?
If it isn't, it should be.
Welcome to Joy Tactics,
the podcast dedicated to all things joyful, joyous,
and meeting as many celebrities as humanly possible.
Hosted by Eric Rahill, Nate Veroni, and Jack Bensinger.
Enjoy.
I can't take no more of this
before I scream.
I scream at you.
Your fifth day in a row
doing the carts at Walmart.
12-hour days.
Coming home to a child who's getting straight C-minuses.
A C stands for camping in the yard.
If you're my kid, that's for sure.
Bring that ticket back to me.
See if I don't put you out there.
Make you bite a hole in the ground and sleep in it.
I better not have to.
Damn, if you had to bite a hole
if you had to bite a hole.
Well, that's what most animals know.
No, they use their paws, dude.
Animal style paws to do that.
Animal style fries.
We should probably let you guys know
just before we get into the full episode
that Eric is just violently hung over right now
at this moment.
Just because I know there's going to be some questions.
There's going to be...
What's up?
Yeah.
Is Eric all right?
Like, what's going on with him right now?
I barely slept a wink last night.
And here's what's happening now, guys.
This is how it was changing.
I have no headache.
Stomach's fine.
But I feel like I'm in hell.
I don't feel like I'm of this earth.
And I don't feel like I deserve to be doing
an award-winning,
soon-to-be-award-winning podcast with you guys.
Yeah, okay.
The Emmys are coming.
This is when my imposter syndrome really kicks in.
So, I just, like, bear with me this episode.
Okay?
Eric, you deserve to be here.
You are wanted.
You are loved.
Okay?
Yeah.
But change.
But just change a little bit.
I'm trying, man.
A version of you is loved.
A version of you is wanted.
If you had to go to the hospital for your imposter syndrome.
Oh, that's good.
Can you imagine that?
That's very good.
Up in the EO, hooked up to IVs.
That's a good idea.
Did you submit?
Okay, let's start cataloging the sketches
that were coming up that are very good.
Okay, so it starts up top.
Oh, yeah, my back feels way better.
Thanks so much.
I'm going to blah, blah, blah.
Right?
That's how it starts.
Normal.
Then Eric comes in in a wheelchair
with a cast that goes up his head,
Marge Simpson style.
What's going on?
Hello, how are you?
I feel like it's crazy that I'm an actor
even though I feel like I don't deserve to be.
Oh, okay.
Say what?
Did you smoke something crazy?
Because you're acting like a high-ass pedigree.
Well, not that, but you're acting fucked up.
And there's some next level.
It's funny to be.
It's funny to have the.
Batty nurse in the back.
Two of them.
Nurse Joy.
Oh, Nurse Joy.
Remember.
Oh, Nurse Joy.
And there's tactics.
Well, right.
Right.
What are you saying, somebody?
Oh, I forget.
That's all right.
Eric showing up to his kid's first soccer game.
Oh, man.
Total the vehicle.
Mm-hmm.
You can smell the Casamigos coming right off me.
Casamigos Blanco or the other one?
Dude, Blanco.
Of course, Blanco.
Silver.
Benedictine.
Mm-hmm.
My belly's hanging out of the Adidas, like, polo that I got.
You're the ref, too.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego Chopped and Screwed Remix.
Bumping that.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.
Shadrach, Rack, Rack.
Someone's been saying it on the subreddit as a Wabendigo, but I want to clear
it up right
now.
It's Abedigo, dude, or whatever.
Oh, and a lot of people are also getting the pronunciation when you're, maybe I've
already
cleared this up.
So, people are saying Rahelian, people are saying Veronian, and I saw Bensingerian.
Yeah.
Benzer.
All I would say is maybe Bensinguian, or.
Bensinguian.
Something like that.
Let me check this out.
We're at 930 tacticians.
Oh, dude.
That's an army, dude.
Are you kidding me?
Jonestown could never.
Did we not already beat him out, Jim?
How many?
I mean.
I don't know if we did.
We're not going to do, you know.
Well, we don't need to be competitive like that.
We don't have the male ego in that sense.
Not the male one.
We defeated it.
Not the human male one.
Ryan Holiday style.
There's a female ego.
No, I said not the human male ego.
Did I say that, actually?
So, you're talking about some type of wild beast ego.
I'm as hungry.
The ego of an animal.
You're right, right, right.
And even though I, well, I've acknowledged and apologized, and I do agree now
that humans
are animals, but for most of my life, I didn't think so.
It's not your fault.
You know when you're on the airplane, and they go, when there's a plane crash,
and they
go, the souls.
How come that's the only place you're souls?
Now, if I get hit by a car, I'm a guy.
If I get stabbed in the woods, a man, man was a, they don't say, soul.
It's because you're so close to God up there.
You know what I mean?
The closer you get to the breaking atmosphere, the closer you become to get to
actually being
a soul.
That's why those astronauts that are trapped up there in the space station, it's
actually
no problem for them, because they're being their truest self.
They're being their real souls.
You think they're playing great music?
And I dare them not to fall in love, by the way.
Those two astronauts that are up there.
I don't know their orientations.
Even though one of them's from Argentina, one of them's from North Korea.
Well, is that true?
New musical is about to drop.
Yeah.
If that's what the space station was, every country had to share the same one.
I guess that, it is the International Space Station, isn't it?
Mm-hmm.
How big is that thing?
Love is Blind Astronaut, International Astronaut Edition.
Speaking of space, I feel like my, you know how like you're, I don't know, I
kind of playfully
have my FYP like giving me sort of conspiracy theories about the moon and that
type of stuff.
And I think that the whole time when I'm watching them, I'm like, I'm just kind
of watching them
for entertainment.
But I feel like they're, some of them are starting to get to me.
Like I'm starting to believe in, like the moon, like the moon one.
Like there's, there's ancient structures on the moon.
And I'm like, cause Jack, you believe that the moon landing wasn't real.
So you're, you're kind of the first person to.
I have no control over that.
I desperately wish I believed that the moon landing happened.
They just made a movie about this with Channing Tatum.
Okay.
And Scarlett Johansson.
Is it about it being fake?
Yes, dude.
Really?
I don't know what that emotion was.
I don't either.
I just can't take it anymore.
They're saying there are pyramids on the moon.
No, there are pyramids everywhere.
Yes, there are, dude.
I don't, there are, there's ancient structures.
There are pyramids inside of circles.
There are pyramids everywhere.
I don't care anymore.
Everything has a pyramid in it.
Don't make me go here.
Oh boy.
Oh, I miss you guys.
You go, you know, oh.
I miss this, man.
It's been a while.
I miss just chilling like this and talking so freely.
Right.
Cause it's funny.
I go to these crazy parties, these insane parties that you can't imagine.
And yeah, the elite are there, but I can't talk like this.
Or otherwise I'm killed on the spot.
And also you're bartending the party as a, uh, bar backing, dude.
Bar backing the party.
John Travolta, how are you doing today, man?
What'd you, what'd you have for dinner?
What'd you just say to me?
Oh, Gotti.
He's still got that Gotti in him.
Is he John Gotti?
No, he's not.
In the movie.
He is?
Is there two John Gottis?
Is there two movies about John Gotti?
Is there a different guy that plays John Gotti?
Is John Gotti the mob boss?
Oh, dude.
Yeah.
Stop playing dumb, dude.
Stop playing them.
Cause they're still around.
Who's in the movie, the Odyssey that plays the Odysseus?
Nobody knows.
I swear.
We don't know.
I swear it was John Gotti.
How could we make money in like a mob sort of way off of this podcast?
Like there's gotta be some illegal way to like insurance claims or something
like that,
you know, get the podcast insured and then get it hacked and then get the
insurance and
then get the money that we would have made.
You know what I'm saying?
Something like that.
Oh, we do that.
We return the mics.
Just return the mics every week.
You know what I'm saying?
Oh.
We said that the mics are broken.
I already did that at once.
Kind of.
Right.
We have thousands of microphones at this point.
For every episode, that number we're on, just know that we have one.
Oh, let me give a spectrum update.
Oh, yeah.
Where are you on the spectrum?
So, well, I've complained to them many times.
I think I'm like flagged in their system as like a red alert problem.
Like they, I think they sent out their kind of God level technician out to my
apartment.
Like this guy was, this guy was elite and he has dealt with the worst of the
worst.
He knows how to handle sort of irate customers like me.
Okay.
So, this guy comes in to my apartment and I'm sizing him up.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
He immediately senses there's about to be some issues, you know.
And he sets me up with a new, he just redoes all the wiring.
You know what I'm saying?
He does a bunch of shit I can't even understand.
But he told me, he said, he said, I got in trouble for this by suggesting that
you get a new router.
Because the routers that they give you are just, you know, the base level
lowest grade routers you can possibly get.
And he's like, if you really want to up your game, get like a Netgear or a
Linksys router from Best Buy.
And did you do that?
No, but I'm thinking about it.
I'm thinking about it once we get the GoFundMe.
Okay.
So, is the boycott on or is the boycott off?
Right.
Where do we stand with Spectrum?
I mean, I feel sort of hopeless.
What's the theme of the episode?
I've given up or something like that?
I can't take it anymore.
I can't take it anymore just to bring it back.
I can't take it anymore.
The abuse from Spectrum, I really just can't.
It's enough.
They have chiseled me away to the hopeless nothingness.
And I just feel like I can't.
There's nothing I can do at this point.
So, what you are is you're in the dark night of the storm, as they say in Save
the Cat, for everybody.
Finally, okay.
I'm starting to understand.
Should I read Save the Cat?
Should I be reading Save the Cat?
Why don't we do that for the next eight or nine episodes?
Why don't we just do a read?
I have it within 20 feet of me right now, if you guys want me to.
What's the most interesting?
We'll look at a page at the end.
But yeah, so Spectrum, I really don't know what to do at this point because of
my internet.
But, you know, we're smooth right now.
Have I been chopping up at all in the Zoom?
It's pretty good.
Barely.
A little chop.
You did chop a little.
Really?
Barely any chop.
Barely, but barely.
Fucking god damn it.
I really do think they have me in a sort of separate system in their customer
service.
Because they like, the way they were talking.
You saw the way they talked to me, Eric.
They knew what was coming.
Yeah, well, they were afraid.
I'm flagged in their system.
You're on the no-fly list.
You are on the Spectrum no-internet style list.
What do you Google?
You know what?
You do, you use Pirate Bay more than anybody I know.
You do, Nate.
Does Jane have the same problem?
Right now, it just said connection unstable.
Interesting.
Okay.
Do you do that listening in?
Switch, switch.
Of course they are.
If so, that's another listener, dude.
That's a blessing.
That's a great perspective, man.
That's a great perspection.
All right.
I can't take it anymore either, dude.
I'm trying to figure out what I can't take anymore, but it's many things.
I can't take living like this anymore, dude.
I swear to God, that's from something.
Doesn't that remind you of something?
I can't take it anymore.
Doesn't that remind you of a song?
Yeah, it does.
It sounds like some kind of R-Crumb.
It sounds like you could see a little cartoon character screaming that out.
I can't take it anymore.
Can't take it anymore.
See what I'm saying?
Yeah.
There's that song by Phil Oaks.
