Name: UK Files Vol 3 - Sexual Sauna Experience [TEASER] | Joy Tactics Podcast | Bonus Ep
Uploaded: 2025-01-16T13:00:29.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'UK Files Vol 3 - Sexual Sauna Experience [TEASER] | Joy Tactics Podcast | Bonus Ep' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'UK Files Vol 3 - Sexual Sauna Experience [TEASER] | Joy Tactics Podcast | Bonus Ep' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-16. Transcript available.

Joy Tactics.
A good evening everybody or a good morning, whatever it is for you.
It's Eric Rayhill here, Nate Verone, and the guy that we help walk home from
the Tesco.
Hello, hello. Thank you so much.
So you have podcast? Nice, nice. I like it.
So you have podcast? Really?
Why don't I come on and eat some crisps on your fucking podcast?
I have been UK drippified.
You definitely have, man.
I don't know if that is UK. I think that's just a strange bucket hat.
What is that posh about this, bitch?
And the glasses are, you said those were 15 pounds?
They were 12 quid, but I talked him down to, he stayed at 12, but I tried
talking his ass down to 10.
And he said no.
He said no, and he had braces on.
No, no, thanks, Seth.
I looked at it like this.
Don't need that.
He said it's 12 quid.
And I said, 12.
Oh, oh.
I went crazy Bo Burnham on him.
And then he said.
Bo Burnham, thank you for coming back in our darkest times.
Thank you for coming back and saying what's up as we go through some of the
darkest times known to man.
We need you, bro.
This is not the time to be in the lab.
This is the time to speak up.
We need your voice.
Get out of your harsh opinion.
You are the fourth horseman of the apocalypse.
We need you to write and read the eulogy of the earth because humanity is about
to go.
Randy Jackson, no thank you.
Yeah.
So what I'm saying is, Eric.
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
Oh, I can't remember.
Oh, damn.
These radiators get hot.
Let me just tell you all this.
What did we experience today?
We saw the motherfucking Rosetta Stone.
We have touched down and seen one of the most crucial ancient tablets known to
man.
Maybe the most.
Yeah.
The most polyglottic rock in the world.
Polyglottic?
No, no, no.
Polyglottic.
Oh, glottic.
Sorry.
Polyglottic rock.
Polyglottic monotomy.
Monotony.
Monogamy.
Two monogamous rocks going down on my, well.
What?
Well, and basically there was a big little circle gathering around the Rosetta
Stone.
Very popular thing for people to see.
Nate just kind of walked right through everybody and got about two inches away
from it.
Right up to the glass.
Did you notice that you did that, Nate?
No.
I got a great idea about that.
You're the only person to ever read every word of the Rosetta Stone.
Oh, I was looking at everything.
You were reading it.
I saw you reading it.
I was going, you know.
Going down on the Rosetta Stone.
I was going down on it.
With my eyeballs.
Spitting on it.
Jacking it off.
Oh, God.
Damn.
All right.
Doesn't have anything like that.
You ever heard somebody come in three different languages at the same time?
Si.
Gracias.
What did the hieroglyphics, like, what did the ancient Egyptians, like, what
did that
sound like, their language?
I can show you right now.
They still speak it to this day in certain parts of Egypt.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Yeah.
Not possible.
I meant it sounded like an Australian.
No, probably not.
I'm just joking.
So, yeah, we saw the Rosetta Stone.
We saw many artifacts today.
We experienced many curiosities.
That thing is shaking, huh?
Yeah, the table shakes.
Also, the dishwasher's on.
So, if that's something that sounds weird, just fucking deal with it.
You're, it's Joy Tactics, all right?
This isn't.
Yeah.
This isn't Diary of a CEO.
What's that?
Which I've been desperately trying to get on to, by the way.
Show the video of this.
Ordering Starbucks like that?
Yeah.
Lucky.
I would like, for this will be the last order you ever take.
I would like a large ice cream espresso with a honey blender.
Half syrup.
Half pump syrup.
And my name.
Cold foam.
Is Dr. Crazy.
Dr. Crazy.
Bleep that, bleep that, bleep that, bleep that.
No, no, that was good.
That was awesome.
Did I say something sad?
Nah, yeah.
So, this is coming to the end of our UK trip.
Yeah.
And I'm feeling that in the last three hours, I have finally gotten over my
illness.
Congratulations.
Congrats, dude.
I am finally feeling it, and I'm now feeling like, damn, I wish we were all
about to start
hanging out for a week right now.
Jack, you need to fucking send it tonight.
I am going to send it.
Jack's sitting on a broken chair.
Chair's broken, wood came off of it.
Damn, and that's going to come out of the fucking Airbnb expense.
Great.
My ratings.
Oh, great.
It's my rating, bro.
My rating is going to plummet.
Don't even pretend for a second.
I went on the shared trip, dude.
I know.
I joined the trip, dude.
I know.
I know.
That was a three-episode callback.
You see how advanced the intellect is functioning?
Wait, we are in the Patreon episode, correct?
Yeah.
And we're past the sort of...
No, we're not.
It depends who's editing.
We're not past the teaser.
It depends who's editing.
Right, because I do the tiny ones, and you put out like full episodes.
So, it says the teaser is Jack.
Can I tell you my logic?
Please.
Isn't it a thing about monetization that you want the video to be 10 minutes or
longer?
Exactly, bro.
Exactly right.
So, I make every bonus 10 minutes or longer.
Is that what I said?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But also, why not?
Make it 30 minutes.
I don't give a fuck.
Make the last 30 minutes to pay.
Make the last one minute to pay.
You know, my rationalization for that is when we started the podcast, I was
just looking...
I don't listen to any podcasts, and I was just looking at different podcasts
and what
they do, and I saw Red Scare does like two-minute teasers, and I was like...
You followed their example.
I was like, I'm just gonna...
We've learned many things from those ladies.
It's time to let go of the Red Scare and pick up the blue...
Wave.
Well, what's the opposite of Scare?
Blue Comfort.
Come here for some Blue Comfort.
This is a Blue Comfort-style podcast, for sure.
The Blue Nouveau.
The Blue Wizard.
But this is what we need to talk about.
We're probably...
And if we're not past the teaser point, we promised this on the last episode
that we were
going to talk about Rio's.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, let me see what that was.
I mean...
Whatever.
We can just cut it whatever this is.
We can just cut it off as the ultimate cliffhanger.
Just so you know, it's about to fucking end right now, and in the full Patreon
episode,
we're about to go into the craziest sexual sauna experience in London.
The most busted fucking ass sauna in all of...
Maybe all of the world.
Whoa.
Now slow down there, horsey.
That was only but a teaser.
Just a little taste of what I can only assume is one of the most fire podcast
episodes ever
recorded.
Head over to patreon.com slash joy tactics now to unlock this crazy ass fucking
episode while
simultaneously getting in at the ground floor of an exclusive community of like-minded
individuals
using positivity to change the world.
Cheers.