Name: China [teaser]
Uploaded: 2025-05-01T11:01:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'China [teaser]' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-01. Transcript available. Watch the whole thing at https://www.patreon.com/joytactics.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'China [teaser]' from Joy Tactics on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-05-01. Transcript available. Watch the whole thing at https://www.patreon.com/joytactics.

joy tactics which chinese dynasty do you guys think you'd be a part of
han no question han so you would like to be in a golden age of culture science
and bureaucracy
that shaped chinese identity for millennia is that really what you'd like uh
hell yeah the golden age where they buried a bunch of people in the or not
buried a bunch
of people but they buried a king with like thousands of soldiers oh his the
king and his
crazy clay soldiers yeah yeah yeah i want to be in that dynasty man yeah is
that the terracotta
mines or whatever crazy terracotta warriors yeah by the way if you're gonna
make an army bro
why i would suggest using something a little stronger than clay man i can break
that shit
with that dude woke up in hell and was so pissed off he was like what the fuck
i got none of it i
built like thousands of clay soldiers and none of them are here and i'm in hell
i'm in hell why'd he go to hell because he's not a christian man of course oh
my fault
do you guys have you guys seen that video of the um the performance artist
modern artist the woman who
was just in the moma in like 2010 just sitting there in a red dress and people
could come up to
her and look look at her and basically what happened was in the 80s she was
dating another sort of
performance artist guy and they did this big performance art thing where they
were each going
to start on one side he started on one side of the china great chinese well the
china's great wall i
guess is actually what you call it and then they met in the middle job and then
they didn't exchange
any words they just kissed each other and then that's when they broke up what
yeah people are like
what are you calling them or just like on video what's the they filmed it they
filmed it why'd they break
up why'd they break up they're making a statement about the about how love can
fade but why'd they
break up but but but but that's in the 80s okay so you understand what this
just happened there
no they filmed it okay they started an other one they they said you know what i
want to break up and
then they said hold on a second i don't want to make crazy ass some crazy
content from this
this podcast would be five minutes long if we didn't have to over explain every
i feel like we
we say something and then we have to explain it in five different ways in similes
analogies definitions
this is this is a two minute if you look at like people understand the bare
bones bullet points of
what we talked about it could it's like this is a one minute 30 second podcast
this is a esl podcast
hands down this is a podcast that they play in schools for people that have
come from other
countries well wait a minute to learn english here's my question different
style what was it
i have more to say about this story about these artists so let me know when i
can continue okay
oh no it was i was just gonna say i would love to see a a transcript where it
has like everything
highlighted in red that is true and everything or no the other way around
everything that we say that
is correct in green and everything that is false in red i'd be interested with
a big asterisk at the
top that says they're trying their very best or they're trying their best in
this moment they could
have done something and what is that's too black and white that's too fucking
things are more complex
than right and wrong sometimes the best thing you can do is the worst thing you've
ever done
right but so this video is made right and then they never saw each other again
until 2010 maybe 25
years later 30 years later she's doing another a beautiful piece of performance
art where she's just
sitting there and people can come up and stare at her and who walks in but the
man she did the great
wall chinese wall experiment with her ex okay that makes sense in silence and
what happens she didn't
react to anybody single tear comes down and she broke her rules and went up and
grabbed his hands and they
had a moment can you imagine having beauty like that in your life can you
imagine something so rich to
enter your lives that's fucked up that's like being at burger king and like
your ex comes in while you're
working you know and it's like it's rush hour right now yeah that's
disrespectful man no man i think he made it
about himself huh he made it about himself yeah he kind of did yeah right
respect what would you guys
fuck at whatever age he was if you guys could do a performance art piece what
would you do i know
this is like a lofty thing but here's what i would do i'm fully um naked and i'm
surrounded by clothed
models beautiful sexual models from every single country
one from norway one from sweden male and female by the way surrounded by beauty
and they are basically touching me all over
yeah i'd do that i would do that
top of the highest building in fucking singapore
wow okay is this porn is this if you think of it that way then it is but that's
the interesting
experiment that i'm playing is this is it porn you'll see at the end
how about that eric i think we got a game show for you finally we've been
looking for that could
it be porn you host a show called could it possibly be porn right now to this
could this possibly be
porn well you could bust anything that's for sure but when does it cross the
threshold right you have
do is it do you have to say it's porn for it to bring bring the fcc commissioners
in
what about like sexual hugging i feel like that is where the line is like a hug
that gets to
like once you get to the lower back i feel like once you go past that and get
to the booty with the hug
you know what i'm saying but then it becomes porn i don't know if a hug can
ever be sexual
i wonder i'm gonna search on porn hub right now i feel sorry for you there's
like if you wrote a sexual hug
i'm gonna look up sexual sexual hugging on porn hub and see if that if anything
comes sexual hug i mean
i want you to see me did you want you huh jack maybe you can enlighten me on
this is boxing it's
not mma so maybe it's not up your alley but did you see the fight between chris
eubank jr
and connor ben no i don't know what that is you haven't heard about this this
was a these guys
this was a crazy a hug happened basically what happened is in the 80s or 90s
there was this
boxer named chris eubank have you heard him he talks he like has kind of talks
like this
he's british talks very elevated but he's a vicious fighter and he fought with
this guy named
ben yeah wait i don't remember what the what his dad's name is nigel ben nigel
ben versus chris eubank
and they fought each other they were kind of rivals and then guess what they
both had sons
and recently those sons just fought each other fucking right in the ring and chris
eubank was
beefing with his son the chris eubank jr and then like he was calling him out
on social media saying
he's disrespecting my wishes this and that but then guess what day of the day
of the fight
they're filming the walkout of chris eubank jr and who's right next to him it's
chris eubank
senior accompanying his son to the ring the fighter of old accompanying the new
young fighter to the ring
well that's normal isn't that sick the two dad the dads are in the ring who
used to fight
their sons are there both dads are there that's funny and i would say it was
got me nearly emotional
frankly well it's funny dude because they were hugging by the way that's the
that was the transition
right they were the fathers were hugging and by the way there's no in my porn
hub search there was no
it was just full porn what what did i say so that's a fucking gap in the market
exactly what people look i think people would get into that people hugging for
like 20 minutes
and just like kind of different angles of course
mmm naked low angle one naked one clothed no no some people like to hug hug hug
rough you know
i'm saying in public giving you the best soccer game because i've gotten some
sometimes that's a red
flag if someone's too good at hugging get the fuck off of me now
get the fuck off of me man
dude well wait a minute i just to bring up the the boxing thing for a second
yeah we're talking about how beautiful it is the dynastic feud
but what i'd want to if that's correct
yeah familial feud maybe family feud
uh i can't help but be rewired and redirected towards the concept of nepotism
and how a lot of these people in boxing too man
they wouldn't be getting the fights that they get
but if it wasn't for old daddy yankee walk them down the aisle
these guys are british
what do you mean
what do you mean by that
so that wouldn't be the yankee it would be probably like
old british daddy
all right well daddy yankees puerto rican right right right right right
sorry but what i'm saying is um
uh you know what i'm saying the nepotism isn't it interesting how
familial ties can be beautiful or they could be dark twisted sadistic
or they can be both i'll put it like the i want to expand people's minds
you could have you could you you could be best friends with your dad but turns
out your dad is
a white supremacist whoa now slow down there horsey that was only but a teaser
just a little taste of what i can only assume is one of the most fire podcast
episodes ever recorded
head over to patreon.com slash joy tactics now to unlock this crazy ass fucking
episode
while simultaneously getting in at the ground floor of an exclusive community
of like-minded individuals
using positivity to change the world
Cheers.