Name: Bobo's Pandy Conspiracy Theory | Ep 14 | Bad Friends with Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee
Uploaded: 2020-05-18T16:00:20.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobo's Pandy Conspiracy Theory | Ep 14 | Bad Friends with Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobo's Pandy Conspiracy Theory | Ep 14 | Bad Friends with Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-18. Transcript available.

Bobo's Pandy Conspiracy Theory | Ep 14 | Bad Friends with Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee

you two are bad friends who are these two idiots white dude and an asian dude
you two are disgusting you two are something we're bad friends can i play you a
song to start the
show why i want to play you a song you can do whatever you want it's your show
baby oh boy
it's you you make all the decisions i'm gonna do this i'm gonna do i'm gonna
come up with these
little games that we do call-ins and these little sketchy sketch things and
when i'm gonna choose
the bad friends colors and the background and i'm gonna change i'm gonna do the
art direction can
you imagine and and then bob you just show up okay so why do you even ask me
i mean it's see what i mean there we go yeah is it nothing about my flat face
or nope okay
did you sing it no there's a kid named amfu it's a remix from last week's
episode
this is that is is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that
is that is that
yeah okay is that is that is that is that is that all right is that is that is
that is that is that
it's really i don't have enough problems that's really good i don't have enough
problems oh get
fucked that's such a fun song that some guy did rude do you like it yeah yeah
you do because i'm
gonna say this you live in my house rent free baby all right and you pay her
and i pay you and i feed
you all right so how about one time you're fucking how about one time you're
fucking side with me oh
papa is angry shout out to um my friend ramey and branson and frankie they live
in georgia we play
warzone together shout out to you guys we took number one one time during the
week what's up babies
it's shout out to my georgia uh warzone buddies on online what's up babies yeah
what's up
babies yeah you know the thing is which the thing is is that
is that is that is that i love that song um i've been uh trying to get you to
play warzone but now
you won't play because of the fact that um fatty eric griffin put posted online
i don't want to be
on youtube yeah we're not gonna because i'm not that good when we play we're
not gonna go online so
will you promise me this do you play tonight yeah did no promise me this that
you play tonight or no
i can't play tonight why because i have a thing what thing it's date night
tonight really at midnight
i'm asking we're supposed to be fucking them oh so you fuck every friday night
no no well we
a lot of nights but i'm saying we do it because the pandemic has kept us in the
house and we don't
like have any normal lives we've been doing date night once or twice a week so
we arrange a nice
night to get dressed up to make a nice dinner to like like not just do the like
the tv sit around
fuck off thing well what about then saturday night warzone baby okay saturday
night i'll play it's
at midnight whenever whatever time you want to play or but if you're not on
dude i'm done with this
podcast great okay oh don't roll your eyes because i'm being real baby stupid
threat because i've been
asking for you all week and i get hurt i tell all everybody you get hurt i get
hurt but you sit there
with eric griffin chumming around with griffin are we gonna go in here bobby
here we're gonna go get
the money bobby hey bobby he's leading you around that game and you're letting
him do it it's making me
sick it's making me sick i know i understand that i don't like what he does i
don't like it i don't
like it either but bobby we gotta go over here to get this day cash drop yeah i
don't like it no
put it in the box and make it a balloon go how the balloon go up i know i don't
like it i don't like
it either and then he puts it on youtube i'm asking you to play i will so that
we can weed him out he's
gonna get so mad when you know what's gonna happen i don't know i don't know
what you think that i feel
good about a fatty fat fuck like him leading me in a war we're gonna get here's
what's gonna happen
hey baby he goes hey baby let's go into that fucking uh mcdonald's right there
wait wait for
the i know what he's trying to fucking do half of the game was spent in fast
food for some reason
i know he always wants to go to those fucking like abandoned fucking fast food
places i don't know why
because it's like rem it's like an old ptsd thing yeah i don't know taking it
back so hey
tell me before you left to go outside you think the pandy is a conspiracy well
you know here's the
here's the thing bobby me yeah you're bob yeah i don't know much i read i you
know i read i read
articles on on the web yeah i watch the news the you know maybe it's the fake
news i have no idea well
it's all fake yeah and and and i'm getting i get pulled one direction right
because for me my
foundation is i'll admit is i you know papa's a liberal i'm a liberal you're a
liberal yeah and um
so then i kind of generally listen to oh yeah i'm on this team but there are
sides of me now that is
being pulled in the other direction well what led you to this what article did
you did you read well it's
just that um it's just i sometimes i listen to like joe rogan and all those
kind of brian callen and
those guys well don't listen to callen that's a that's a foolish mistake that
guy's a moron and then
then i just i sent joe rogan you know he said that maybe he's gonna move to
montana or something so
he can do stand-up and stuff he wants to move because he has enough money to go
wherever he wants
yeah if you were that rich wouldn't you just leave i would have left a long
time what would be the
purpose yeah like paulie flew to hawaii i would fly to hawaii too if i had yeah
he's in hawaii right
now speaking of hawaii and your shirt look at you got a hawaiian shirt on i
watched your movie last
night and i called you didn't i uh oh god i watched so david listen listen david
spade has a new movie
called the wrong missy on netflix where spades our homie we love spade he's our
buddy swartzen is in
it who by the way so funny and i texted nick i go very funny in the movie he
goes it's the fattest i've
ever been and i go i don't i don't know it is the fattest he's probably yeah
definitely but it's not
that he was fat he's not fat in it it's just i think um bloated it looks like
that he like jimmy
he was regular size and he died went into the ocean they found him and then you
know over the
week the the the ocean water made him bloaty that's mean he's our friend that's
mean he's our friend
oh then it looks like instead of that it looks like that he uh it was a regular
guy right he got
real hongo hongo right and then just ate a buffet in vegas for 24 hours
straight and then flew to
hawaii to shoot and then no and then went onto a boat got shot in the head went
in the water and then
he got blown i called you after i watched the movie and that you put me in a
bad mood i didn't put you
in a bad mood i said this let the let's let the fans decide then i said this
phrase my wife and i said
an under utilization of your talent it's a bummer that i didn't see more of you
that's a compliment
bob that's saying i wish i i wanted to see more of you i i was bummed since the
year 2000 i've been
auditioning for adam sandler movies i auditioned for a bunch of them uh the
pixels did you go out for
that yeah a bunch of zohan a bunch of stuff okay and i could never get into his
world you know i
memorized the lines i go in there i could never get into a movie and that was a
dream like i just want
to be in an adam sandler movie yeah okay now you are so then last summer spade
calls me he goes hey man
will you do one line in my movie in hawaii and if anybody had asked me that
yeah i'd be like ah
yo mark you look deal you would if i asked you you would do it for me there's
rare occasions i would
do it for you yeah but most people most people i just feel especially if my
agent called me because
it's one line he'd even talk me out of it probably and go i i don't think it's
worth your time but spade
wanted you to do it he called you directly yeah spade called me and i and i go
one line i go i don't know
and he goes it's a big favor to me and adam and that was like to egret no adam
sandler oh the other adam
who produced it so i go ah maybe this is my way into that world and and you
know i went i went there and
i was kind of just like i have one line so it was no pressure i didn't i slept
fine that night you
know so usually when i'm i've been in a movie before did you stay in that hotel
that you guys shot in
no it was a different hotel that they shot but my point is is then when i
showed up um i'm on set
and you know i see all my friends are there witowski love him he's so funny so
funny um lapkus yeah spade
yeah and i'm um and i i do i do one life sandler's wife i do one take right and
then i hear cut
i shouldn't be talking about this i'm gonna i'm why this isn't bad it's not bad
i know
i shouldn't be talking about this but um i hear cut and then i see on my
peripheral vision mr sandler
come across you know i mean to come to me you gotta do it a different way yeah
yeah and
it's just not right whatever i'm doing is not right the vibe wasn't right what
he wanted
yeah i think i was making because you know back in the mad tv tv mad tv days if
they gave me a line
i would do everything i can to get a laugh from that one line well that was the
that was the job
right right that was so even if it was like you know you know welcome to mcdonald's
right i would
go you know do something what you know may i do a stutter or you know i mean do
what you would do
i would do something to get especially in front of a live audience do whatever
i can to get a laugh
you'd go welcome to make a dino yeah yeah you'd do it huge but i didn't do that
it's a movie so i go you
know i'll just play as real but try to get a bend it just every take was like
it's too broad it's too
i don't understand what you're you know it just wasn't working so what you see
in the movie is
as you know what i did and um it hurt my feelings feelings have you seen the
whole film you haven't
watched it no no so you don't even know what it is well i've seen the clips
that they sent you the clip
fans go ah you got a line and you find that condescending i find it to be um
listen i'm not
like some of these other comics that you know are trying i'm not like i don't
want to name anybody
okay don't name anybody but i've done a lot of tv shows and yeah movies it's it's
not as if
it's my first rodeo baby nah papa banana and i um so you know by doing one line
i'm doing a favor
i'm trying to like go you know what try to be in service yes service the film
service the film yeah
that's the move and um i did that but in retrospect maybe i shouldn't have done
it well here's the
thing and you've been in those situations before bob come on bud i have the you
want you want to you
want to have the fans get a real good laugh go ahead and watch uh james franco's
uh the disaster
artist which is based on the movie the room which is one of the worst movies of
all time
uh your boy is in four scenes i'm in the first fucking scene like the first
thing you see it's my big
fucking orange head guess what i say what nothing this is i go like this and
they cut me out i have
literally zero dialogue yeah you see me about to say something four times nathan
fielder and i had a
whole bit in an alleyway gone i was so mad about it i know like so hurt by it i
know you were that i
genuinely wanted to say something to franco and be like my guy i respect what
what people do when they
cut a movie and things end up on the editing floor that's how it goes but then
don't show me
what do you mean well don't show me and i don't say anything all right don't
show me cut around
you yeah don't show me oh cut around you don't show me but if it's a white shot
and your little
orange head because it's not it's hard it's not hard to miss your ugly orange
head vfx can do wild
cool stuff you could have just done something right get rid of me get rid of me
cut around me it's you
know you know how television and film works you do because you do a thousand
takes there's a way to
cut arou